by Jade Winters
‘It’s okay.’
Cara wanted to say more but thought it best to leave it alone. She got the hint – Erin only wanted to be friends with her now. If that’s all she was offering, it would have to do. Cara didn’t want the day to end on a sour note and an idea came to mind. She twisted around in her seat to face Erin. ‘Look it’s getting late now and it’s a long drive back. What about staying in a hotel for the night and going back first thing tomorrow. We can have dinner, a few drinks…’
Erin looked doubtful. ‘I don’t know.’
‘Okay it’s up to you. If you want to take a chance driving back in the dark over those scary mountains...’ Cara’s eyes widened in mock horror. ‘Not to mention what could happen if we break down.’
‘Okay, okay you win. But we’re having separate rooms.’
Cara feigned shock. ‘Erin… What type of wanton woman do you take me for?’
Her eyes searched Cara’s. ‘Er, no comment.’
From the look on her face, Cara couldn’t tell if Erin was being serious or not. But it didn’t matter. She was going to spend an extra night with Erin – who knew what could happen!
Chapter Nineteen
Twenty minutes later they stood in an empty foyer waiting for the receptionist to finish her phone call. Erin had decided to stay the night, not because she was scared of the drive home; she didn’t want to tell Cara but she had made the journey between Cumbria and Edinburgh numerous times before and it was always by herself. No, she had decided to stay because she had begun to feel close to Cara again. It was the kind of connection that not many people were lucky enough to have in their lifetime and she missed it. Though she didn’t know if she was ready for the kind of closeness Cara had implied in the lake. The attraction was definitely still there but Matt was in the back of her head. It was as if she was betraying him all over again. She knew this way of thinking was stupid – Cara was single and had in no way led Matt to believe that they would be anything but friends. Despite this, she just couldn’t help the way she felt.
The male receptionist put the phone back in its cradle and eyed their wet hair and damp clothes with an enquiring look. ‘I only have one room left I’m afraid – no twins, only a double bed,’ he said, in response to their request for two double rooms.
A ripple of desire coursed through Erin at the thought of sharing a bed with Cara. It was tempting, but also dangerous. Before Erin could answer, Cara had already whipped out cash from her pocket and placed it on the desk.
‘No problem.’ Cara signed the registration form and the receptionist handed over the key and gave them directions to their room.
They rode up in the small lift in silence and Erin trailed behind Cara towards the room. Once inside, Cara turned to Erin. ‘You can have a shower first and I’ll order room service. What do you fancy?’
You. Erin brushed past her and walked towards the bathroom. ‘Just a club sandwich and a glass of Merlot, please,’ she said, before disappearing behind the door.
I can do this. It’s just one night. I’ve made my position clear to her. I’m not interested in a romantic relationship. She stripped naked and stepped underneath the hot spray of water. She wondered what Cara was doing next door as she washed her hair with the complimentary shampoo provided. Was Cara regretting showing her cards and revealing she still had feelings for Erin? As Erin soaped her body, her mind flashed back to Cara holding her in the lake. The feel of Cara’s nipples pressing against her back. She didn’t know whether it was the heat from the shower or the thought of Cara that was causing her face to redden. Why couldn’t things just be simple? Girl meets girl – they like each other and walk off into the sunset together. Why did there have to be so many mitigating circumstances? But she knew for a fact the only thing that was holding her back was her loyalty to Matt.
The rap on the door brought her back to the moment. Cara called out that the food would be ten minutes. Reluctantly she rinsed the soap off her body and stepped out of the shower, wrapping a large cotton towel around herself as she stopped in front of the mirror and stared back at her reflection. Just enjoy yourself and stop thinking so much!
Cara was standing by the window when she entered the room; looking lost in a world of her own as she gazed over the city’s night lights.
Erin cleared her throat. ‘Is everything okay?’
Cara spun around, startled out of her muse. Her eyes dropped from Erin’s face to her towel then back up again. ‘Sorry, yes everything’s fine. If you’re finished in there, I’ll just take a quick shower.’
Erin stepped aside and let out a sigh as Cara walked into the bathroom and closed the door gently behind her. She was towel-drying her hair when there was a firm knock on the door. Fumbling in her bag, she found a bank note and tipped the young waiter after he had wheeled in their food.
Now alone, Erin poured two glasses of wine from the bottle Cara had ordered and drank deeply. It was just what she needed to relax. Her nerves were still on edge from the incident at the loch. The touch of Cara’s body pressed against her own had made her feel… she stopped the thought abruptly. Don’t even go there. Not now, not ever. But how can I help it? Every nerve end came alive whenever Cara was near.
Erin was on her second glass of wine before Cara made a reappearance. She stood in the doorway, droplets of water glimmered on her shoulders. Her wet hair was slicked back making her high cheek bones even more prominent.
Erin’s breath caught, a quiver of excitement in her stomach. Wanting Cara so badly that she could barely breathe was nothing new – it was a default mode within her. But she had forgotten what it was like to be held in her arms. To feel the nakedness of her smooth skin. Heat rose to her face.
‘Wine?’ Erin scrambled for something to say. She could hear the shakiness in her own voice.
‘Yes please.’
Cara started towards her and for a moment Erin had to fight the urge not to run. The closer Cara got the faster her heart beat.
Erin racked her brain again for something to say. ‘So you’re a hundred percent sure about renting the shop?’
Cara nodded. She was feet away. ‘I’d be crazy not to don’t you think?’
‘Hmmm. Most definitely.’
Cara accepted the glass of wine Erin held out to her before raising it to her mouth. Erin had great difficulty taking her eyes off Cara’s lips. They looked intoxicating – just begging to be kissed.
The room seemed to be closing in on them. No one but the two of them seemed to exist any more. Whether it was the alcohol that had loosened her defences or because she had no defences left, Erin didn’t know, but when Cara’s fingers brushed against her cheek as she pushed a strand of loose hair away, a spark was ignited that she knew couldn’t be extinguished. Nothing else mattered but the here and now. Erin didn’t want to talk about the past, present or future. She didn’t want to think about Matt or how this one action would affect him. All she wanted was Cara – in every way possible.
Erin felt an overwhelming rush of emotion – it was as if she was eighteen again, seeing her first love for the first time. As if Cara had read her mind, she took a step closer until they were barely touching. Holding Erin captive with her gaze, she lowered her lips to Erin’s in the gentlest of kisses. Erin was astounded at the familiar warmth that suffused her at Cara’s touch and responded enthusiastically, caught up in the moment. Erin pulled her closer and covered her mouth with her own. The kiss deepened as Erin’s tongue danced carelessly with Cara’s, tasting the hot sweetness of her mouth. It had been so long since the two of them had connected like this, but the familiarity of her taste made it seem like yesterday.
Cara’s hand slowly slid inside Erin’s towel and gently stroked her breast. Erin took a sharp intake of breath on contact which seemed to encourage Cara to go further because she immediately tugged the towel down, exposing her swollen breasts. The warmth of Cara’s hot, moist mouth sucking hard on her nipple sent a surging tide of heat between her legs.
With
out warning, Cara spun Erin around and pushed her face up against the wall. Cara pressed against her and reached round with one hand to massage her breast. With her free hand she hitched the towel up to Erin’s stomach. Just the touch of Cara’s fingers seeking out the most sensitive part of her soul sent wild tremors along every nerve in Erin’s body. Cara’s fingers worked miracles on her clit. Lifting the hood away, she rolled it between her fingers. With a soft pressure, she used her forefinger to circle the delicate bud and tease the tip with feather-light touches. It swelled and throbbed. Erin arched her back and lifted her hips. Cara continued to kiss and stroke the back of her neck with her tongue until Erin’s body trembled beneath her. Draping an arm over her pelvic bone, Cara held her still and curved her fingers before pushing them deep inside her. Suddenly she stopped mid-thrust and slowly withdrew her fingers. Erin turned around in a daze, biting down on her bottom lip when she caught a glimpse of Cara’s eyes as she removed Erin’s towel and took in her nakedness — they were wild, and hungry with desire. Instead of touching her again, Cara cocked her head to one side.
‘You haven’t changed one bit,’ Cara said.
Erin twined her fingers at the nape of Cara’s neck and she pushed into her, thrilled at the feel of Cara’s erect nipples pressing against her chest.
‘Why have you stopped?’ Erin asked between ragged breaths.
Cara’s lips curled into a mischievous grin. ‘I just want to look at you for a minute.’
Erin shivered as Cara bent her head and lightly snaked her tongue across Erin’s breasts, leaving behind a wet trail. Erin desperately wanted to push Cara’s head between her legs and feel her tongue inside of her. The subtle arch of her hips wasn’t missed by Cara.
Cara ran her finger along Erin’s thigh, stopping just before her glistening entrance. ‘Still as eager as ever, aren’t we?’ she said, with a playful grin.
Cara’s dark, hooded eyes were full of lust, all sense of play now gone. With great poise, Cara let her towel drop to the floor. Erin drank in the perfection of her body – high breasts, long legs and a taut, smooth stomach. Her loose hair cascaded gently over her slender shoulders. Erin became wetter at the thought of being skin-to-skin with her. Without saying another word, Cara dropped to her knees in front of Erin. She looked up at her. ‘Put your leg over my shoulder.’
Erin thought she had misheard what Cara said, ‘Over your?’
‘My shoulder. Trust me.’
Tentatively Erin draped her leg over Cara’s shoulder, using the top of her head to keep herself steady. Cara pressed her face against her. Erin let out a groan as the velvet warmth of Cara’s tongue began making a circular movement on the inside of her thigh. Cara gripped both of Erin’s bum cheeks and used her tongue to suck, lick and explore every part of her until she reached the most vulnerable tip of her body. The part that was screaming out to be released from its self-imposed bondage.
Cara’s insistent tongue teased Erin’s pulsating spot softly at first and then, with a swift change of intensity, the tip of her tongue flickered rapidly over the swollen nub. Erin gripped Cara’s shoulders, her nails sinking into the firmness of Cara’s flesh as she tried to anchor herself as a swimming giddiness spun her around and around.
‘Don’t stop,’ Erin whispered. Her breath came fast, her heart pounding furiously against her chest. ‘Please… I’m so… so…’ Erin panted, straining for each new breath as her stomach swooped up and down, hard and heavy. ‘Oh… yes… yes…’ Erin screamed as she threw her head back, a cluster of stars flashing before her eyes as the pleasure inside her continued to build like a torrent of fire. All the while Cara continued to rake her tongue against Erin’s clit; one of her hands remained gripping Erin’s bum cheek, the fingertips of her other hand driving into the warm wet entrance.
Locking her fingers in the thickness of Cara’s hair, Erin tugged at it as an intense wave of pleasure washed over her.
Then, rising up from between her legs, Cara stood and her mouth was on Erin’s again, kissing her deeply, sharing the delicious taste of desire. Erin pulled Cara against her sweat-soaked body. She couldn’t wipe the smile off her face.
‘Do you want some water? You look delirious,’ Cara asked.
‘If this is what it feels like to be delirious, I’ll take it any time of the day. And no, I don’t want anything to drink.’ She pushed Cara back onto the bed and lay on top of her, moving around until their clits finally touched. ‘All I want is you.’
Cara smiled and swept her tongue across her lips. ‘I’m ready and waiting.’
Erin’s eyes wandered from Cara’s face to her breasts. ‘Good.’ Erin reached behind her and slipped her fingers easily into Cara. ‘You’re so wet,’ she whispered huskily.
Cara looked up at her with a lazy smile. ‘Hmm, I wonder why.’
Erin continued to grind her clit against Cara’s as she held her gaze. ‘You don’t know how much I’ve dreamt about this moment and now it’s here I don’t know where to start.’
Cara reached up and gently massaged Erin’s breasts. ‘If you want my advice, start at the top and very, very, slowly, work your way downwards.’
Chapter Twenty
Erin awoke just as the sun was rising over the horizon. A feathery-light sensation ran through her body as if it was having its own recollection of the night before. She smiled to herself – their lovemaking was something that she wasn’t going to forget in a hurry.
Her phone sounded at the side of the bed. It was probably work. Absent-mindedly she picked it up and scrolled down to her messages. Her heartbeat picked up speed and she broke out into a cold sweat as she looked at the sender – her brother. ‘I need to see you tonight! Need to talk.’ The familiar feeling of guilt returned tenfold. Panicked, Erin wondered if he’d somehow found out about them? She looked at the woman beside her who she loved with all her heart. What was going to happen now? What should she do? The situation she found herself in was impossible to figure out. She had been impulsive and foolish. It was obvious that this time was no different to all those years before. Matt was still in love with Cara and there was no way that Erin was going to hurt him.
How stupid had she been to unearth a passion that had been buried so long ago? She had let herself get carried away and now she would have to pay the price.
As if somehow sensing her inner turmoil, Cara’s eyes slowly opened and she gave Erin a reassuring smile. ‘What are you looking at?’ she challenged playfully.
‘Quite possibly the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen,’ Erin replied.
Cara smiled a slow, poignant smile and Erin sighed, flopping back against the headboard.
‘What’s the matter?’ Cara asked.
‘Why does everything have to be so damn complicated?’ Erin grumbled, staring absently up at the ceiling.
‘It doesn’t have to be complicated, Erin,’ Cara assured her, reaching up and taking her hand. ‘If this is about Matt, you’ve got to let it go. We can’t punish ourselves forever. It’s been twelve years.’
‘Did twelve years change how you feel about me?’ She read the answer in Cara’s eyes and said, ‘My point exactly…Matt still loves you, and I can’t destroy him by taking you away from him again.’
Cara sat up, indignant. ‘You didn’t “take me away” from him the first time, I wasn’t with him anymore, remember!’
‘Yes, I remember and I in no way mean to be insensitive, but if we hadn’t been together when you found out you were pregnant, you would have got back with Matt,’ Erin retorted.
‘How the hell do we know that?’ Cara’s voice rose in anger. ‘I really don’t understand why you’re being so obstinate about this. Is Matt’s happiness more important to you than your own? Or than mine, for that matter?’
‘He’s my brother, Cara, and I’m the traitor who slept with his girlfriend.’
‘I wasn’t his girlfriend then and I’m not now, goddammit!’
‘Well, you can’t be mine either,’ Erin said quietly. She hesit
ated before speaking again. She didn’t know if she could bring herself to say the words she knew she must. ‘Last night was a mistake, Cara.’
‘Don’t say that.’ Cara reached up and stroked her cheek.
‘Don’t’. Erin turned her face away and closed her eyes. ‘It can never happen again.’
Cara put her fingers to Erin’s cheek and brought her face round towards her own. ‘Why are you letting the past dictate our future?’
‘Because I can’t do this to Matt.’
Cara frowned. ‘Do what exactly?’ she said slowly. ‘Love me?’
‘You know what I mean.’
‘No, I don’t think I do.’ Cara edged herself off the bed and grabbed her t-shirt from the chair, slipping it over her head.
‘Cara. I can’t hurt him, I just can’t.’
Cara walked over to the window and kept her back to Erin. ‘And what about us? We’ve got to suffer because your brother has a teenage crush on me?’ She turned around, but remained where she stood. ‘Erin, I have never said anything to make Matt think there was any chance of us getting together – not in a million years.’ Cara sighed as she ran her fingers through her hair. ‘Look, I’m very fond of him but I’m gay through and through and most importantly…’ She glanced apprehensively at Erin. ‘I don’t love him. I love you.’
Erin held her face in her hands. Her throat ached with unshed tears. ‘If what you say is true, you’ll do this for me. You’ll leave Cumbria and never come back.’
Chapter Twenty-One
Cara had only herself to blame for the situation she found herself in. Sleeping with Erin was not meant to happen. Neither was falling in love with her all over again. What was it with her letting her emotions get the better of her? I do not need Erin. I do not need sex. I do not need a relationship and all the bloody stress that goes with it! She reminded herself repeatedly as she strolled along the hotel corridor. It was sod’s law that they had run out of milk in their room. She couldn’t think straight without her morning fix of caffeine.
