by Claire Adams
I let the door slam behind me and it wasn’t until I’d thrown myself onto the couch, face buried in the cushions, that I realized that I had left my backpack at the dining hall. I hadn’t even thought about it while I was making my retreat. I had had to get out of there—nothing was going to stop me. I groaned. Not only had Zack humiliated me in front of everyone, but now I had to figure out how I was going to get my textbooks back.
I had to assume that Jess would bring them back to the dorm. She was flighty but she would definitely have noticed that I’d left empty-handed. I screamed into the cushions until my throat felt raw and I started coughing, hot tears flowing from my eyes as I thought of how much I had been humiliated. I lifted my head from the couch and slammed it back down, grateful that it was well-padded. I did it again and again. I was so stupid. I had let Zack mix me up; I had let him get in my head. I should have never gone to the stupid party with Jess, I should never have let Zack kiss me, I should have never let him take me back to the frat house. I should have known better. Zack was no better than any other guy on the planet, even if he had been there for me when my mom first got sick. He was just another asshole who would take advantage of me and then embarrass me for my troubles.
I sat up on the couch after a while and started to calm down. Jess would grab my backpack; I didn’t have to go back for it and face the prying eyes and smirks of my classmates. I could live down the humiliation. I’d lived through far worse than humiliation and come out of it okay. I could get through it. I would bury myself in my work and I wouldn’t even give anyone the satisfaction of remotely showing I’d ever cared about Zack. I’d just pretend like it was some stupid thing that didn’t matter at all. I took deep breaths and decided to wash my face.
Thirty minutes after I had stormed out of the dining hall, I heard a knock at the main room door. I was confused—and more than a little alarmed. If it was Jess, I’d have to apologize if I had accidentally locked her out. Sometimes she forgot her keys, which was understandable—and usually neither of us was very far away. I’d also have to apologize for making her haul my books back up to my room, and for running away the way I had. If it was someone we knew, I didn’t know whether or not I should answer it. It could be someone who wanted to rub salt in my wounds and tease me some more about Zack’s display. It could be someone who somehow had managed not to even hear about it, or someone who had but wanted to comfort me. I stood in the common area for a long moment staring at the door, hoping that whoever was on the other side of it would just go away and leave me in peace.
But if it was Jess, and she had brought my books up, I couldn’t just leave her hanging outside. There was another knock. Either way, I thought, I would have to face the situation eventually. I took a deep breath. When I went to turn the knob on the door, it wasn’t locked; I set my spine—clearly it wasn’t Jess, then. If she had come up, she would have tried the door before assuming she was locked out. And she would have known for sure that I’d come straight to the dorm instead of going to the Library after that mess. It had to be someone else.
I opened the door. If I could have formed any expectation of who was on the other side of it specifically, other than Jess, I would never in a million years have guessed that it would be Zack. He stood there, looking both mischievously amused and concerned, his dark eyes glinting and widening at the sight of me.
“Whoa,” he said, stopping just short of coming into the room. “Are you okay? What’s wrong?”
My anger—which had started to subside—exploded in me like coals on a low fire.
“What the hell do you mean, what’s wrong? You humiliated me in front of the entire dining hall! Why? What the hell, Zack?” Words tumbled out of me—I asked him if it was because of the stunt I’d pulled, asked him if he’d demanded the date just so he could set up the stupid thing in the dining hall; I kept talking until I couldn’t think of anything else to say and just stood there and sighed. “Well?”
Zack was shaking his head, a smile still tugging at the corners of his lips. “Evie,” he said gently, coming closer to me—coming into the room and closing the door behind him, reaching out to put his hands on my shoulders. I sidestepped, still feeling hurt and betrayed. “Evie, no one was laughing at you. Everyone was laughing at me.”
“Those girls you were sitting with were definitely laughing at me. They pointed. I saw it.”
Zack smiled. “Yeah, well, they’re jealous, that’s all. They were laughing at you to make you feel bad because they’re jealous of the fact that it’s true: I’m still stupidly, crazy hung-up on you.”
I staggered backward until the corner of the wall caught me between my shoulder blades. “What?”
Zack smiled wider. “I’m in love with you, you stupid girl. What did you think?” I shook my head slowly, feeling shock as deep as I had when he had jumped onto the table. “I never said I’m not an idiot.”
I laughed in spite of myself. Zack moved closer to me again, licking his lips nervously.
“I’m sorry if you felt humiliated. I didn’t mean to humiliate you. I meant to…I don’t know…make those stupid girls feel like idiots. And put the attention back on me. I could tell you’d noticed what was happening.” Zack was maybe two inches away from me. He brushed his lips against my temple. “Look, I’m an idiot, but I’m an idiot in love.”
“Just…no more public spectacles, please?”
Zack chuckled lowly. “I will try my hardest. But you’ve got to live up to that too.”
He brought his lips down along the side of my face, to my cheek, down to my jaw, and then around to my lips. Before I could even think of the reasons why I should stop him, he had me pressed against the wall, my mouth sealed, his hands on my waist, holding me frozen. Zack’s tongue swiped across my lips and I opened my mouth without thinking, immediately and completely enthralled and stunned by the kiss. I should have expected it; when his lips had moved down along my jaw, I should have known that he was going to kiss me—but I had been so wrapped up in the moment that I hadn’t been thinking at all. I came out of my shock but the feeling of Zack’s hard, muscled body against mine, and the emotional high I was on, made it completely impossible for me to pull back and tell him to stop. I couldn’t think of anything rationally; all I knew was that I wanted that kiss, that I wanted it to keep going and maybe even never stop.
Zack’s hands fell to my hips, and I moaned against his lips as he gave me a careful squeeze; I could feel the heat of him through my clothes, the tension in his body. Zack deepened the kiss more, his tongue probing my mouth, his head tilting to give him complete control, lips moving against mine. He sucked my bottom lip into his mouth and nibbled on it playfully, making me half-gasp at the tingling jolt of sensation the tactic sent shooting through me. I was hot and cold all over, trembling from the dizzying upset and the sudden onslaught of lust I was feeling. I couldn’t quite believe what was happening; it was like my brain was five minutes behind the rest of the world, and that I just couldn’t seem to manage to catch up.
Zack’s hands began to move all over my body, tickling my waist and then grazing my breasts, moving back down to my hips. I snaked my arms around his broad shoulders and pressed myself against him. Moments before, I would have said that the last thing I would ever do would be to kiss Zack. I would have told you—after the situation in the dining hall—that Zack was dead to me and that any feelings that I had for him were completely finished. But between his apology and explanation, and the way he was kissing me, I couldn’t even remember how I had felt moments before. All I knew was that I absolutely needed him and couldn’t stop touching him. If I stopped touching him, stopped kissing him, I might tremble and shake so hard that I would fall apart.
I didn’t break away from the kiss, but I groped behind me blindly, fumbling around with my eyes closed and my face occupied to try and find the door to my bedroom. I reached out and knocked my hand against the door hard enough for it to briefly hurt—and then found the lever-handle. Zack, hearing the
noise, pulled back and I almost groaned in sudden frustration. “My room. Now.” My voice was breathless and tight to my own ears.
“Good idea,” Zack said—in a voice as breathless and tense as my own.
We tumbled into the room together and I barely remembered to close the door behind us. In the moment I was out of Zack’s arms I realized—barely—that if anyone came in they’d know what we were up to immediately. I lurched toward my computer and turned on my music, not even bothering to pay attention to what playlist I had selected.
Zack wrapped his arms around me and then his lips were on mine once more and I pressed against every inch of him, reeling, and my mind spinning. I could feel the hard ridge of his cock straining at his jeans, digging into my hip. I was trembling again, my heart pounding in my chest, my hands shaking as they trailed along his back and shoulders, over the tee shirt he wore. I barely noticed the wail of electric guitars, the shrieking of a female voice launching into a fast-paced song—in the back of my mind I recognized it as Yeah Yeah Yeahs; I couldn’t focus enough to think of the song itself. Zack pulled and tugged at the hem of my shirt, working it up over my breasts while I squirmed. I threw my arms over my head and we broke away from the kiss at the same moment, just long enough for him to pull the shirt over my head and throw it across the room.
My hands slid along the lines and planes of his back; I could feel the rippling muscle down along his spine, the heat of him through the fabric of his tee shirt—I was moving instinctively as Zack caressed me almost everywhere all at once, cupping my breasts through my bra, tickling my ribs, gripping my hips, trailing across the small of my back as he pulled me close to him. I brought my hands around and found the hem of his shirt and started pulling it up. I couldn’t think of anything that I wanted more than to see him naked—I absolutely had to see him again. The sight of him, the taste of him, the feeling of him, had haunted me from the time we’d had sex on the couch at his frat—no matter how angry I’d been or how depressed, I’d remembered how incredibly hot it had been, how much better than anything I’d done since I’d lost my virginity to him a few years before.
Somehow Zack’s shirt was over his head, and Zack’s lips shifted along my jawline, brushing and leaving a tingling trail in their wake as he brought them down to my neck. He kissed along the column of my throat, moving down one side and up the other until he came to my ear. I moaned as he slipped my earlobe between his lips, sucking it and then nibbling it playfully, worrying it with his teeth and tongue—it was more erotic than I would have ever thought it could be, sending hot and cold electric jolts through my body. Zack’s hands slid against my skin, trailing around to my back, and I felt his deft fingers touching and feeling for the clasp of my bra, finding the hook-and-eye in a moment. He unhooked it and shifted back from me just slightly—I could still feel the brush of his skin against mine—and guided it away from my body. It seemed like it almost evaporated, disappearing off somewhere—I didn’t care where. He lifted me up onto the bed and slipped between my splayed legs, bringing his mouth back up to mine and once more kissing me hungrily.
Before I could make my brain work to figure out what was going on, Zack pulled away from my lips and dropped his mouth to my breasts, kissing along the tops of them, working his way slowly to my right nipple. He cupped the underside of my breast and took my nipple between his lips, sucking and licking. I cried out—a flood of pleasure gushed through me, and I felt my pussy getting wetter and wetter as his tongue lapped at the sensitive bud. He teased me for what seemed like an hour—even grazing my sensitive flesh with his teeth sharply enough to send a jolt through me that might have either been pain or pleasure—before he switched to the other nipple. I threaded my fingers in his hair, writhing and twisting, pushing my hips down against his. Through the fabric of my clothes, I could feel the hard ridge of Zack’s cock pressing right up against my soaking wet pussy and I rubbed myself against him, wrapping my legs around him as tightly as I could and rocking my hips.
Zack groaned with my nipple between his lips, his hands on my waist tightening convulsively. “Fuck,” he said, panting, breaking away from my breasts for an instant before he buried his face against them, and nuzzling me. “Evie you’re driving me insane.”
“All your fault,” I managed to say.
Zack sealed my lips with his own before I could elaborate, kissing me so hungrily, so thoroughly that for a moment I thought I might have forgotten how to breathe. He found the zipper on my skirt and tugged at it blindly, not fumbling but somehow not managing to catch it in the right direction for a few moments; I almost laughed—he was just as mindless in his desire as I was. Finally he caught the zipper the right way and tugged it down, loosening the skirt at my waist. He lifted me up from the bed with one arm and pulled the skirt over my hips with the other. I uncoiled my legs from his waist and the fabric fell to the ground, neither of us caring what happened to it. Zack tugged away my panties, almost ripping them in his urgency, throwing them across the room without a look before he kissed me again.
Moments later, he was shifting down onto his knees, his hands rubbing and massaging along my thighs, up to my hips. He spread my legs wider, and sank down in front of me, looking up with eyes almost black with desire.
“You always tasted so good, Evie,” he told me, dragging a finger along my slick labia and bringing it to his lips. He smiled as he sucked it clean. “You still do.”
He buried his face against my pussy and I cried out—not even sure if the sound of my pleasure was drowned out by the music playing over my computer, but not caring one iota as Zack began to suck and lick. He went to work as if he were starving—as if he was dying of thirst and I was a river, the slurping sounds barely reaching my ears. Zack’s tongue played along my inner labia, darting against me to slide into me for just a moment before dancing away, teasingly sliding and slipping right around my clit but never exactly on it. I writhed and moaned out, tangling my fingers in his hair and pushing my hips down against his face, struggling for better contact than his teasing mouth would give me. Zack rubbed up against my clit with his nose even as he sucked my inner labia between his lips, his tongue gliding up and down in a quick fire movement that made me gasp.
Finally, finally, when I was certain I couldn’t possibly take any more teasing, Zack brought his tongue up to my clit and began to lap at it—gently, carefully at first, pausing to gauge my response. I moaned. It felt so good—I had to have more. In moments he was alternating between teasing my clit with his flickering tongue, batting at the bead of nerves so fast I couldn’t even imagine it was possible, and then shifting down to lap up the fluids from my labia, and then back up again. I fell back onto the bed, one hand still tangled in his hair, the other gripping the sheets as tightly as I could as my hips bucked and flexed, my body not under my mind’s control but moving like an animal out of pure instinct. I felt my pussy gushing, my inner walls flexing and fluttering erratically, a sensation like a knot deep down between my hips tightening every moment the sweet torture continued.
In my ears another song roared—but I barely heard it; the pounding of my heart, the sounds of my panting and my moans, my cries of pleasure, were so loud that everything else went away. I lost all ability to judge time—it could have been minutes or hours as my pleasure mounted and mounted and I thought that it was going to drive me insane. When I least expected it, every muscle in my body tensed and I almost shrieked with pleasure, arching up off of the bed, tugging at Zack’s hair without concern and twisting the sheet until it nearly ripped in my hand. Wave after wave of pleasure washed through me, hot and cold flashes of sensation working out from my pussy up to my brain, out to my hands and feet, until I was nothing more than a collection of tingling, firing nerves, my whole body so overwhelmed that it might have been pain instead of pleasure that I was feeling. I pushed my hips down against Zack’s face, and he continued his oral assault, lapping up the fluids that gushed out of me, not even slowing down with his tongue against my clit and
then between my labia, moving between the two so steadily that I thought it would never end. Just when I was starting to be slightly afraid of that—when I started to wonder if a person could actually come forever—the spasms started to abate, and Zack began to slowly pull back, slowing down and gradually breaking away from my pussy.
I lay panting and shivering, trembling from head to toe, in my bed, naked for Zack to see, wracked with aftershocks of an orgasm so potent I couldn’t even think. I half-heard metallic clattering and the rustle of clothes in a break between songs, and then Zack was climbing into the bed with me, wrapping his arms around me tightly and dragging his lips along my neck, along the line of my jaw until he came to my mouth. He caressed me all over, soothing me instead of teasing me, and I slowly came back to myself by inches, my breath slowing down and my heart finding its usual rhythm once more. Tremors of muscle spasms danced up and down along my arms and legs, and everything below my hips felt unreal as I curled up to Zack’s naked body and buried my face against his chest. That had been more intense than any orgasm I had ever experienced in my life—and I had no idea why. Zack was amazing, but some combination of the emotional high and his newfound skill had culminated in pleasure so intense that I was almost scared to try it again.
After a few moments, I tilted my head back, looking up at him. “That is just not fair,” I told him, smiling slightly.
“What’s not fair?” Zack grinned.
