by Parnell Hall
“Actually, I think it’s more quaint to use the word quaint.”
“I’m getting a headache.” Sherry raised an eyebrow. “Now there’s a phrase you must hear a lot from the women you date.”
“How did we get on the women I date?”
“I’m not going to touch that.”
“Or them,” Aaron suggested.
“You’re not going to touch them. I’m not going to touch that.”
“I’m glad your sense of humor is returning,” Aaron said. “Isn’t this the point where you offer me coffee?”
“You want coffee?”
“Not really, but it helps with the social awkwardness.”
“I wasn’t aware of being socially awkward.”
“You’re not. But I get all flustered when women come on to me.”
Sherry cocked her head. “And just when we were doing so well,” she said ironically. “Yes, I guess we’d better have coffee. You can consider it one for the road.”
“Is that a hint?”
“Of course not. I wouldn’t expect you to take a hint. Don’t worry. When I want you to leave, I’ll throw you out.”
“I appreciate that,” Aaron said.
Sherry turned away to suppress a smile as she led him into the kitchen. She knew she was overdoing it, bantering incessantly with Aaron Grant, but she just couldn’t help it. She told herself it was just because it wasn’t often she had an intellectual equal who could give it back at her as good as he got. Irritating though Aaron Grant might be, she found sparring with him strangely exciting.
Sherry washed out the coffeepot in the sink, poured in water. Aaron Grant watched what line she filled it up to.
“Four?”
“They’re small cups,” Sherry said. “I always make two for one.”
“Oh.”
“I wasn’t planning on us drinking coffee for hours, if that’s what you thought.”
“No, I would consider that slow, even for me.”
“Can you utter a single phrase without sexual overtones?” Sherry demanded.
“I’d examine your own overtones. That phrase had none.”
Sherry put in a new filter, measured four tablespoons of coffee, switched the coffeemaker on. It began to burble.
“There,” she said. “That will take about three minutes. Do you suppose you can last that long?”
“No fair,” Aaron said. “That one was deliberate.”
“All right, that one was,” Sherry said. “You wanna declare a truce?”
“Only if you do. I’m not sure we can communicate without wordplay.”
“Oh, that was wordplay? I thought you were just naturally antisocial.”
“See what I mean?” Aaron said. “You can’t control yourself.”
“Oh, is that a fantasy of yours? And in your fantasy, what do I say?”
“How did you get in here?”
Sherry’s eyes widened. “That’s crude, even for you.”
Aaron pointed. “And it’s probably somewhat confusing to him.”
Sherry blinked. Turned.
Chief Harper stood in the doorway.
27
“Sorry,” Chief Harper said, “but you left the door open.”
Sherry Carter found herself blushing bright red. “I what?”
“Left the door open,” Chief Harper repeated patiently. “And your car’s gone, and there’s another car in the driveway. I was afraid you were being robbed.”
“That’s my car,” Aaron Grant told him.
“Yes, I can see that now. You’ll pardon me, Miss Carter, but where is your aunt?”
“She went out.”
“Out? At this hour?”
“That’s what I said. She insisted on going.”
“Where?”
“To look for clues.”
“But we have a clue,” Chief Harper said. “That’s why I’m here.”
“And you want Aunt Cora to interpret the clue for you?”
“Of course.”
Sherry frowned. “I think we have a problem here, Chief. There’s a killer running around leaving crossword puzzle clues. It would be nice if these clues meant something. And maybe they do. But if you want Aunt Cora’s opinion, she thinks they don’t. She’s out looking for more clues. But not this kind. The other kind. The muddy footprint. The distinctive tire track. The bloodstained knife.”
“Vicki Tanner was struck with a blunt instrument.”
“That was just an example. Though I’m sure Cora will be grateful for the information.”
Chief Harper frowned, narrowed his eyes. “Are you telling me she’s not going to help with the clue?”
“What help do you need, Chief? I mean, what do you think it means?”
Chief Harper shrugged. “A yes vote with three letters? Seems to me it has to be aye.”
Sherry turned to Aaron. “Now, don’t you feel dumb?”
“He had time to think it over,” Aaron said. “You spring it on me in conversation, then say, What’s it mean? before I’ve even had time to consider.”
“You think it does mean aye?” Chief Harper asked.
“Of course it means aye,” Sherry replied. “It’s simple and obvious. At least to some people.”
“And what does your aunt think?”
“Aunt Cora thinks it’s a red herring. That the killer’s just teasing us. That it doesn’t mean anything.”
“So you said. I mean about this particular clue. Does she think it means aye?”
“Let’s put it this way: She doesn’t think it means anything else.”
“That’s less than helpful.” Chief Harper was scowling.
“Why don’t you show him the grid?” Aaron suggested.
“Grid?” Chief Harper said.
“Crossword puzzle grid. Sherry’s been laying out the letters.”
“Really?” Chief Harper said. “I certainly would like to see that. Ah, is that coffee you’re making?”
“Can’t fool a policeman, can you?” Aaron said. “Good thing you made four cups.”
Sherry poured coffee for the three of them, set milk and sugar on the table. Chief Harper and Aaron Grant added liberal helpings of both. Sherry took hers black.
They carried the coffee cups into the office, where the crossword puzzle grid was still up on the screen.
“Look at that,” Chief Harper said. “They actually fit.”
“They do so far,” Sherry said. “Though you’ll notice this last one doesn’t intersect.”
“Did your aunt work this out?”
“No. I did.”
“Oh.”
“Which doesn’t necessarily mean it’s wrong,” Sherry said with a slight edge in her voice.
“Still, Miss Felton’s the expert,” Chief Harper pointed out. “Are you telling me she hasn’t tried to solve the puzzle?”
“No, I’m not. Once again, I’m telling you her opinion is there is no puzzle to solve. Which is in itself a solution. But let’s not get sidetracked here. The point is, if these are three genuine puzzle clues, and these words are the solution, they could fit together in a grid of this size.”
“And no other size?” Chief Harper was staring at the screen.
Sherry grimaced. “That’s not entirely accurate. This is the only size in which I’ve been able to intersect the words queue and ewe. There’s no reason why I couldn’t fit them into another puzzle where the words simply didn’t connect. You notice, in this grid the word aye doesn’t connect with either word. And there’s no way that it could. It can’t intersect with queue because both words go down. And it can’t intersect with ewe because it has a higher number, so it must be lower in the grid. You see what I mean?”
“Not exactly, but I get the gist,” Chief Harper said. “Listen, no offense meant, but I really need to talk to your aunt.”
“Why?”
“Because she has to be the key. The killer’s leaving crossword puzzle clues, and the Puzzle Lady lives right here in town. This can’t
be coincidence. There has to be a connection, and your aunt must be the key. Doesn’t that make sense to you?”
“In a way.”
“Oh? Well, in what way doesn’t it? Because I have slightly more than a casual interest. I just left the crime scene. The prosecutor would like nothing better than to see me gone, and is just looking for an excuse to stab me in the back. And, guess what? Right now he’s got all the ammunition he’d need.”
Chief Harper paused, took a sip of coffee, and gestured with the cup. “I withheld the clue sent to the paper. No problem there. There was no reason to believe it was genuine. It was something that needed to be quietly checked out. No one could fault me on that. But now this.” He spread his arms. “Here’s a clue attached to a corpse. Pretty authentic, wouldn’t you think? I mean, I’d be hard pressed to argue this could be the work of a copycat prank. This is not the type of thing I should be withholding from anyone. This is evidence removed from the crime scene. It’s the type of thing that could cost me my job. Your aunt saw fit to steal it from the pocket of the corpse, and here I am.”
“No, you’re not,” Sherry said.
That caught Chief Harper up short. “What?”
“That’s a very pretty speech, but it’s full of holes. We were there. Both of us. At the crime scene. When Aunt Cora gave you that paper. We left, you stayed. With the clue. You could have turned it in, you could have shown it to someone, you could have bagged it for evidence. You could have done any number of things you policemen do with clues. Instead you came rushing over here just as soon as you could to find out what it meant.”
Chief Harper scowled. “Are you telling me I’m a bad cop? Are you telling me I should be off the investigation too?”
“Not at all. I’m just saying don’t blame my aunt for everything. You’re the one who bought into this withhold-the-puzzle-angle bit. It’s up to you if you want to keep it up. If you don’t, fine. You’ve got a newspaper reporter right here who’d be happy to print the whole thing as soon as you give him the go-ahead.”
“Quite frankly, your aunt is driving me nuts. First she steals this off the body. Then she slips it to me as she’s leaving. Then I come to see her and she’s gone. And you tell me she’s out looking for clues. I have to wonder what other evidence she might be messing up.”
“Well, I like that.”
Three heads turned at once.
Cora Felton stood in the doorway. Her face was dirty, and her hair was matted and greasy, but her eyes were bright. She was holding a paper bag.
She smiled. “If you keep talking about me like that, I won’t show you what I found.”
28
“They were in a dumpster,” Cora Felton told them. “Which is why I’m not at my sartorial best. You also might want to stand downwind.”
“What have you got there?” Chief Harper said.
“See for yourself.”
Cora Felton dumped the contents of the bag out on the table next to the computer.
They were a pair of brown leather shoes and a pair of white cotton socks.
“What’s this?”
“Penny loafers,” Sherry Carter told the chief. “Where did you find them?”
“Like I said. In a dumpster.”
“Don’t be a pain. Where is this dumpster?”
“Behind the high school.”
Chief Harper gawked at her. “Are you telling me …?”
“That these are Vicki Tanner’s shoes?” Cora Felton said. “Absolutely not. I’m just bringing them to you. Identifying them is your job. But they certainly look like her shoes. She was in the habit of wearing penny loafers and white cotton socks. I couldn’t swear Vicki was wearing these last night, but I bet someone else could.”
“What were you doing in a dumpster at the high school? Don’t tell me you were looking for these shoes.”
“Actually, I was looking for the murder weapon,” Cora Felton replied. “The shoes were just a bonus.”
“You found the murder weapon?”
“I’m afraid not. I found the shoes. But I was looking for the murder weapon.”
“Why?”
“Because that’s the whole problem, isn’t it? Where was she killed? If she wasn’t killed in the graveyard, her body was brought there from somewhere else. Her car was found at the high school, so it might have been there. Not necessarily, of course, but it’s something to be checked out. If she was killed there, the murder weapon might have been left at the scene. As far as I can determine, it wasn’t. Unless it was left in her car.”
“Her car?”
“Yes. Her car’s locked. I couldn’t search it. Of course, you can.”
“Miss Felton, you can’t go around searching crime scenes.”
“So arrest me. You want these shoes or not?”
“That’s not the point. The point is you can’t continue to do what you’re doing.”
Cora Felton smiled. “Of course I can. The only question is, what are you going to do about it?”
“Cora, don’t be rude,” Sherry said.
“I’m not being rude. Just stating a fact. This started out as fun—with all due apologies to that poor young girl who was killed. But I didn’t know her. Now it’s personal. Vicki Tanner was my friend. And I intend to get to the bottom of this if it’s the last thing that I do.”
“Uh-oh,” Chief Harper muttered.
“What?” Aaron Grant said.
“That never even occurred to me.”
“What’s that?”
The chief turned to Cora Felton. “That’s right. Vicki Tanner was your friend. The killer taunts you with clues and then kills your friend. Is there a connection?”
Cora Felton sighed deeply. “I’d thought of that,” she said softly. “I really hope there isn’t.”
Chief Harper said, “I hadn’t thought of that. I’m thinking of it now. And I don’t like it at all. As if I didn’t have enough to worry about. Now I gotta make sure your other bridge players are safe.”
“Not to mention her,” Aaron Grant said, pointing to Sherry. “If the killer really is targeting the Puzzle Lady, she’d be the main target.”
Sherry gave him a look, but Aaron Grant seemed serious.
“See here now,” Cora Felton said. “You’re a nice young man, but I won’t have you frightening my niece. In point of fact, she has nothing to worry about.”
“Oh? And just why is that?” Aaron Grant said.
“Because Sherry’s smart enough to stay away from the killer. Which Vicki wasn’t. Which doesn’t seem right somehow, though I guess I can understand it.”
“What do you mean?” Chief Harper said.
“Well,” Cora Felton said. “Obviously the killer is a handsome young man, attractive to women. Which is how he is able to get close enough to kill them. Picking up a runaway from the Midwest couldn’t have been hard. Picking up Vicki Tanner would have been difficult. I still can’t figure out how he could have done it. She leaves the Country Kitchen in her car intending to go home. Or so she says. Vicki would not be the first woman ever to tell a fib. Especially if she thought she was on her way to meet a young lover.”
“Are you serious?” Chief Harper said.
“It’s one possibility, and seems most likely. Vicki said she was going home. Instead she went to a rendezvous which got her killed. If that rendezvous was not planned in advance, if Vicki didn’t know where she was going when she left the Country Kitchen, then how would the killer intercept her? Was he waiting in the restaurant parking lot? That would certainly be risky. If anyone saw him talking to her there, he’d be on the hook for murder. I can’t imagine him taking such a risk.”
“So if he didn’t …?” Chief Harper asked.
“Then we have an even bigger problem. Vicki Tanner leaves the Country Kitchen and heads home. Now the killer has to intercept her car. Get her to drive to the high school. And how is he going to do that?”
“I have no idea.”
“Neither have I. And that’s the thin
g we have to figure out if we have any hope of solving the case. But looking at it logically, everything points to the fact Vicki Tanner knew where she was going before she left.”
Chief Harper snorted in disgust. “Fine. That’s all well and good. You want to help me with my problem here? We have a puzzle clue—or rather, I have a puzzle clue, because as far as anybody else is concerned, I don’t have a puzzle clue. Because they don’t know I have a puzzle clue. Because you swiped it off the corpse. Now, if that comes out, it will cost me my job. And not just for not telling people about the clue, but for being so incompetent as to let you steal it in the first place.”
“You weren’t even there,” Cora Felton said. “How can they hold you responsible for something that happened before you even got there?”
“Aunt Cora, I don’t think he wants to debate this,” Sherry said, glancing apprehensively at Chief Harper’s face.
“I most certainly don’t,” he said. “What I would like is for you to tell me what it means. This clue you stole from the crime scene.”
“No fair. I gave it to you,” Cora Felton said.
“Right,” Chief Harper said. “Making me an accessory to the crime. Tampering with evidence is usually not advisable for a police chief. It is not the best career move one can make.”
“Your sarcasm is noted,” Cora Felton said.
“Good. Now that we all understand the situation, do you think you could help me out with the clue?”
Cora pointed to the computer monitor. “It would appear you’ve already done that.”
“Your niece has played around with the words. What do you think of her solution?”
Cora Felton smiled. “Sherry is extremely clever. I’m sure she’s done well.”
“That’s not what I mean. Try not to be deliberately dense. If someone is sending you a message about these murders, I need to know if you’re getting it. Have you decoded the clues?”
“No more than you see there. And as for fitting them into a grid, I don’t see how that can possibly help.” She gestured to Sherry. “Though you should certainly go ahead with your efforts because, on the other hand, it can’t possibly hurt.”
