I’m still beating myself up after the encounter with Huntley in the locker room a few hours ago. How could I be so stupid? I was about ready to rip her clothes off and then, for whatever sardonic reason, sense returned. I hated the look on her face when I pulled away and I hated myself more for putting it there, but I was playing with fire. It took every ounce of restraint I had not to kiss her or worse. Do more than just kiss her. It took me three cold showers to calm down after she left but it didn’t make me feel like less of an asshole.
“If you don’t quit hounding me I might just piss in YOUR beer bro,” I bite back. When I say I’m not in the mood I’m not lying. Fortunately, he’s the only one who knows how to deal with me when I’m like this. “You gonna tell me what’s got your balls in a knot or must I play ‘I Spy’ and guess for myself?” he asks, eyeing me over his beer bottle. I think about it carefully, wondering if I should tell him what he most likely already knows. I decide to see if he was smart as he thinks he is. “Ok fine, I’ll guess,” he taps his finger on his chin in an exaggerated movement and finishes the last of his beer. “I spy with my little eye, something beginning with H and ending in untley.” Like I said, he already knows. I look at him but still don’t say anything. “Yeah,” he sighs, “I thought so.” His expression isn’t mocking. It’s filled with understanding and sympathy.
“I was a total asshole,” I mutter, not quite sure if he heard me.
“Didn’t take you long,” he replies, “What happened?”
I tell him everything, starting with how she walked in and caught me by surprise, in nothing but a towel, and ending with how she practically ran out like her life depended on it. “I feel like I’ve been losing my mind ever since I met her,” I add. He looks down at his empty beer bottle, pulling his bottom lip into his mouth. That’s how I know he’s thinking and I won’t like what he’s about to say. “Look Gray –“ he stops short when his phone starts ringing. He frowns at the number and then answers, “Hey Dem –“
I see the look on his face change from confusion to concern and back to confusion. Why is Demi calling him? The fact that she even has his number makes no sense considering they can’t stand each other.
“Yeah he’s here. Why?” Brody answers and looks at me. Why would she be looking for me? Sure, Demi and I have been friends since kindergarten, our families are pretty close, but why not phone me instead of Brody? The thought makes me pull my phone out.
What the fuck?
Six missed calls and four text messages. How did I not hear my damn phone?
“Ok, you need to calm the fuck down Demetria! Don’t yell at me woman!” he yells into the phone. Seconds pass and he yells again, “Yeah, alright, we’re on our way! No need to get your panties in a twist!”
Judging by his tone he’s pissed. And I’m confused. What the fuck is going on?
He ends the call, pulling out a few dollar bills and throwing them on the counter. “Grayson, we have to go. Now.” He starts for the door and I jump up to follow him. “Care to tell me what the fuck is going on?” I yell to his back, trying to speak over the loud music. He doesn’t respond until we’re in my truck.
“Drive to Huntley’s apartment building.”
“What’s wrong Brody?” I sound panicked.
“Look, Demi said Huntley won’t answer the door but she called Demi earlier, sounding like something was really wrong. Demi said she sounded hysterical on the phone but couldn’t make out what she was saying because she was crying so hard. Demi’s there now trying to get Huntley to open the door but there’s no sound coming from the apartment. She’s freaking out, wanting to know what you did to upset Huntley so badly.” He brushes his hand through his hair, letting out an exacerbated sigh.
“Dammit,” I yell, hitting my steering wheel and turning the key in the ignition. I don’t think twice about flooring it when my tires spin on the asphalt. I know she was upset when she ran out of the locker rooms but hell, I didn’t think it would hurt her this much.
Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.
It takes us ten minutes to get to Huntley’s apartment block. I pull into the parking lot and Brody grabs my arm before I can jump out. “Wait Grayson, I need to tell you something.” His face flickers with concern. “Remember when I told you Coach warned us to stay away from Huntley?” he asks.
“Yeah?”
“I wasn’t completely honest. Coach didn’t say anything about us staying away from her. In fact, he asked us to keep an eye on her,” he looks down. “I’m sorry I lied, but I saw the way you looked at her and the last time you looked at a girl that way,” he looks back up at me, meeting my gaze, “she ripped you apart. I can’t watch you go through that again man.”
Under normal circumstances I would be pissed that he lied, but right now I know he was looking out for me.
“I get it bro, but we need to talk about this later.” I nod, a silent agreement between us that he’s forgiven, and we jump out the car. I race through the front doors and ignore the guy from campus security yelling at us in the lobby. We take the stairs two at a time until we hit the fifth floor. Demi is waiting outside Huntleys’ apartment, tears streaming down her face. She looks scared.
“Oh thank God,” she says, running straight into Brody’s arms. He wraps his arms around her and starts rubbing her back, whispering soothing assurances. Their exchange astounds me. On a good day they can’t have a decent conversation without yelling at each other. This is weird.
Demi calms down and hesitantly pulls away from Brody. She scowls at me, anger radiating from her tiny little body. Demi has always been a firecracker, but if looks could kill I’d be a pile of ashes.
“What the hell did you do Grayson?” she shrieks, a few more tears slipping down her cheeks. Dammit, I’ve really screwed up.
“What did Huntley tell you?” I ask carefully. I don’t need to upset her more than she already is.
“She phoned me in complete hysterics! She said something about seeing you in the locker rooms and then mumbled something else before we got cut off. I’ve been trying to get her to open up for the last thirty minutes.” Brody turns to wipe her face and she looks up at him, a small smile tugging at her lips. They’re definitely acting weird.
I knock on the door and listen for any sounds of movement. Nothing.
I knock louder. “Huntley, open the door!”
Still nothing. Shit.
I bang on the door, feeling it vibrate through my hand. “Huntley, if you don’t open this door I’m gonna kick the fucking thing down!” I yell.
When there still isn’t any response I take a step back. Brody moves, pushing Demi behind him. My foot makes contact with the door followed by a loud snap. The doors’ lock breaks and it swings open.
I walk into the dark apartment slowly, listening for anything suspicious. Turning to face the hallway, I see a figure on the floor in what I assume to be the main bedroom. As I move closer I realize it’s Huntley, she’s curled into a ball on the floor. Panic hits and I almost run the short distance, kneeling beside her when I get to her room.
Demi and Brody aren’t far behind. Demi walks in and switches a bedside lamp on, illuminating Huntley’s tiny body. Her face is red and tear-stained, with her hair sticking to her cheeks. As her chest moves up and down her breathing is shallow. I move slightly, and she stirs, but doesn’t quite wake up. I slip my arm under her legs and then her arms, lifting her off the hard floor and moving her to the bed. She makes a soft sound and clutches my shirt in her small fists. “I’ll grab a blanket,” Demi whispers. I lay Huntley down and slowly pry my shirt free of her vice grip. Her eyes flutter open and she looks straight at me. Her eyes pierce mine and I can see how red they are, their blue color slightly dull and almost lifeless. I want to know what made her cry so that I can fix it.
“What’s going on?” she croaks. Demi hands me the blanket and I take a seat on the bed next to her, carefully pulling the blanket over her.
“Demi has been trying to reach you for the last half hour
. She’s been standing outside your apartment and when you didn’t answer she called us,” I say, my voice straining slightly. She lifts herself into a seated position and looks at us, not saying a word.
“Grayson,” Demi whispers, “Let me talk to her alone. Why don’t you and Brody go to the living room?”
I look at Huntley, searching her eyes for God knows what, the look on her face unreadable. Dammit. I squeeze her hand once and leave the room with Brody. Demi moves to close the bedroom door and just like that we’re thrown into silence. “Fuck!” I whisper-yell as I slump onto the couch. Brody takes a seat next to me and I push both my hands through my hair in frustration.
“Don’t beat yourself up over this Gray,” Brody says. I know he means well but until I know why she’s so upset I’ll blame myself.
“How can I not? When she left the locker rooms earlier she was upset because of me”.
Brody doesn’t reply and we sit in the silent darkness for what feels like forever. I keep running through the last month and wonder when I started caring about her so much. I tried avoiding her, tried staying away because I knew what would happen after the first time I saw her. It’s only happened to me once before and when it ended I was left to pick up the pieces of my life. Alone. I can’t risk it again. But I’d be lying if I said there wasn’t something more pulling me towards Huntley. Something about her.
The sound of footsteps pull me from my recurring thoughts and I look up to find Demi standing in front of me, arms folded over her chest. She looks pissed.
“Is she ok?” I ask, making no attempt to hide the fact that Huntley scared the shit out of me.
Demi glares at me and then sits on the coffee table directly in front of me. “She’s fine. I gave her some pain killers for her headache and she’s sleeping now.”
I breathe a sigh of relief and rest my elbows on my knees. “Good.”
“What the hell were you thinking Grayson?” Demi asks angrily.
“Now don’t be getting involved Dem, this doesn’t concern us,” Brody intercedes before I can respond. This is not good. When these two start fighting it takes nothing short of a damn hurricane to get them to stop. I swear they’re in love and just won’t admit it.
“The hell I won’t! Did you not see what a mess we found her in?” Demi’s voice raises a few octaves and her drawl becomes more prominent the angrier she gets. “I know it wasn’t all Grayson’s fault, but that little stunt he pulled today certainly didn’t help!”
“Don’t act like Huntley’s completely innocent in this! She was there too!” Brody snaps.
I can’t deal with this. My head is already at war with itself, the last thing I need is to add Brody and Demi’s impending fight. I stand up and walk to Huntley’s bedroom. I just need to see her, make sure she’s alright, more so for myself. I push the door open quietly and walk until I’m standing next to her side of the bed. She looks peaceful, her long black eyelashes resting on her cheeks and her chest moving rhythmically.
I start thinking about what it is that draws me to her so enigmatically and I can’t help but feel like she might be as broken as I am.
I sit down, careful not to wake her, and place a feather-light kiss on her forehead. “I’m so sorry beautiful girl,” I whisper, hoping against all hopes that somehow she will hear me and feel how sorry I am. I don’t want to be the reason she breaks any further. I don’t want to be the reason her eyes are puffy and her cheeks are red.
I want to fix her.
Because deep down I know she’s going to fix me.
Chapter 10
~ Huntley ~
I hear Grayson leave the room after kissing me on the forehead. I’ve been awake but decided to keep my eyes closed to avoid having to talk to him. It took everything in me not to grab him and hold on tight when he whispered “I’m so sorry beautiful girl.” I don’t want him to blame himself for the state they found me in but that means I’d have to open up about my past and I’m not quite ready for that yet. I don’t know if I ever will be.
When the pain killers Demi gave me kick in, I decide not to fight my bodies need for rest. I fall into a deep sleep only to be assaulted by a haunting memory I wish I could permanently erase.
Jake’s huge house is empty. Something immediately feels off because there’s always a party here on a Friday night. In the three years I’ve been with Jake he’s never skipped throwing a party unless his parents were home, which wasn’t often. Their business always kept them away from home for long periods of time and I’m certain that’s why Jake is the way he is.
I’m already on edge and the fact that something doesn’t feel right isn’t helping with my nerves. The doctor called me today and after rushing over there he confirmed that I’m eight weeks pregnant. It’s Jakes’. I know that because he’s the only guy I’ve slept with but I don’t know how he’s going to react. I never know how he’s going to react to anything these days and I’m convinced it has something to do with drugs and alcohol. His parents have been home less and less and that’s made him party more.
I walk into the foyer expecting Jake to walk in but he doesn’t. It’s too quiet. I put my hand on my stomach and allow myself to think about my baby. Our baby. I wonder if he will have his daddy’s dirty blonde hair and brown eyes, or if she will have my blonde hair and blue eyes. I haven’t decided what to do yet, I wanted to tell Jake first so that we could decide together. Aborting is not an option but I would consider adoption. I’m too young to be a mom, though I know my mamma will support me no matter what. Jake won’t give up his party boy lifestyle and he definitely won’t want to be saddled with a kid now.
I walk up his staircase, deciding to check his room. Big mistake.
I hear moaning and as I walk in I see him and my best friend Taylor on his bed. They’re both naked and he’s on top of her, her legs wrapped around his waist as he thrusts into her. Their moans muffle the sound of my entrance and I stand stuck in the doorway. I think I might get sick. I gasp, covering my mouth as the tears build in my eyes. She screams his name and looks up, locking eyes with me.
“Oh fuck,” she says. Jake stops and looks back. His eyes go wide when he sees me but the look on his face is what finally gets me to move. I spin in the doorway and run towards the stairs. “Huntley wait!” Jake yells. As I make it to the top of the stairs his hand wraps around my arm, pulling me to a stop. I can’t bring myself to look at him. If I do then I know I will be sick, the image of them replaying itself in my head repeatedly. “Huntley I’m –“
“Shut up Jake! Just shut up!” I yell, interrupting whatever pathetic excuse he was prepared to give me.
His grip on my arm tightens. “You weren’t supposed to be here,” he growls. What the fuck? Anger temporarily takes the place of the betrayal I feel. He’s got nerve, I’ll give him that. My head snaps up and I look at his flushed, sweaty face through tear-filled eyes. “I came to tell you that I’m pregnant you asshole!”
His face pales and then contorts in anger. “You cheating whore!” he yells. His arm comes up and his fist makes contact with my jaw, making a popping sound. Pain shoots through my face. The force of his punch makes me lose my footing and I stumble, falling face first down the stairs. Everything around me is a blur and it feels like every part of me is on fire. I curl up at the bottom of the staircase, placing my arm over my stomach protectively. It hurts. It takes seconds to realize what’s going on but when I come to I hear Taylor yelling at Jake. “What the fuck Jake? You pushed her down the stairs?” She runs down but Jake gets to me first. His bare foot makes contact with my ribs and I cry out in pain. Why is he doing this? I know he’s aggressive but he’s never lifted his hands to me. Until now.
“You cheated on me!” Jake yells, kicking me again. I want to die it hurts so much. Taylor pulls Jake away, yelling “What are you talking about?”
My eyes are closed but I can tell he’s looking at me while he answers her. “She came over to tell me she’s pregnant! There’s no way that baby’s mine so sh
e must be cheating!”
I suck in a breath, praying for enough strength to get myself and my baby out alive. The pain in my stomach has me wondering if there’s even still a baby to care about. “It’s yours,” I choke out. Between crying and the pain I’m having a hard time saying anything coherently. “Only you,” I choke out again, feeling the tears slide down my face. I know there’s no point in explaining he’s the father, he clearly doesn’t believe me.
“Oh my God Jake, she’s bleeding!” I hear Taylor shout. I don’t need to open my eyes to know where the blood is coming from. I can feel it and it makes me cry harder.
I feel hands on me and Taylors’ voice in my ear but then everything goes black….
I wake up in a cold sweat, tears streaming down my face and I clutch at my flat stomach. The memories of that night are still so fresh, even after seeing a therapist to help cope with my ‘loss’ as they called it.
A sob escapes my mouth and I cry harder, wishing that the pain I feel would just go away.
A few minutes later, two strong muscular arms envelope me. I don’t need to look up to know it’s him, his apple and mint smell give him away. I should push him away but right now I just don’t have it in me. I want to feel safe. I crave security in any way I can get it, even if it’s temporary.
“Sssh” his voice soothes me, “its ok beautiful girl.” His hand moves up and down my back. Somehow, amongst all the other messed up things I’m feeling right now, having him here with his arms wrapped around me protectively and his scent surrounding me, I feel calmer.
Beneath Your Beautiful Page 7
