“Is it what was bothering you at the sht...,” she tried to remember the German name, but had to give up, “the place we got married?”
He shook his head. “Nein,” he said softly, then sighed deeply. “Anna, I don’t suppose you’d be willing to wait until tomorrow to talk about it?”
Anna swallowed. “Whatever you would like, Alex,” she said softly, lowering her eyes. She would be obedient and quiet.
“Anna, I don’t want your day to be ruined,” he said taking her hand in his. “I want you to have a good wedding day.”
“Yes, Alex,” she whispered.
Why should today be any different from any other day? Maybe it would just be better if she didn’t know at all. It was very distressing for Alex; it must be very bad. Her fingers felt raw and she rubbed the backs of them.
They sat silently for a few minutes. Alex put his arm around Anna and hugged her to him. She stared at the floor and wondered what would happen next.
“Alex? Oh, there you are. Where have you been?” Greta walked through the double doors of the library, cheerful as ever. It was a stark contrast to the somber mood of the library. “Mutti wanted to know where you were. It’s time for dinner.”
Alex glanced at Anna and smiled at her. She gave him a nervous smile and stood when he did. He took her hand and led her out of the library, down through a long formal sitting room, past the garden, and into the biggest room she’d ever seen. Anna stopped short in the arched entryway, amazed.
Along the walls, columns three stories high and topped with statues of people supported a vaulted wooden ceiling. Three enormous crystal chandeliers hung from the heights, bathing the room in light. Arched windows high on the walls between the columns let in the last traces of evening sun. An enormous white marble fireplace took up most of the wall at one end of the room, so large that a dozen people could easily stand inside.
In the middle of the room sat the largest table Anna had ever seen. There were enough seats for Alex’s entire family, children included. Despite Anna’s discomfort with Alex in the library, she clung to his hand as he guided her to a seat to the left of the head of the table, where Wilhelm sat. Alex sat between herself and Wilhelm. Kurt and Gretchen sat across from them.
Gretchen gave her a strange smile as she sat directly across from Anna. She held Otto in her lap, kissed the baby’s head and glanced pointedly at Alex, who was talking to his father. Gretchen looked back at Anna with a haughty look and a wicked smile.
A wave of nausea hit Anna as she somehow understood what Gretchen was doing. No! It couldn’t be true. Alex would have told her if he’d fathered a son with Gretchen.
Wait. Would he have? Was it any of her business? No wonder Gretchen was so proud. She had given Alex something that Anna would never be able to give him. Maybe this was what he didn’t want to tell her. How would Alex be willing to go back to the US if his son was here? Was this the real reason he came back in the first place? She thought he’d been telling the truth about why he came back and that he didn’t want Gretchen, but maybe she’d read him wrong.
The look that Anna had seen on Alex’s face when he looked at Gretchen in the hallway haunted her. It was full of emotion; the same way he often looked at Anna.
Anna looked down into her lap and swallowed, willing her stomach to get under control. She didn’t want to embarrass Alex or make him regret marrying her even more. Surely he couldn’t be happy about marrying her if Gretchen had his child. But it would be difficult with her married to his brother. Did Alex have feelings for Gretchen?
Anna looked up to see Alex staring at Otto. There was a longing in his eyes that stabbed at Anna’s heart. Of course he wanted children. He needed children. He was the oldest son. He had to have a son to pass his title to.
*****
Wilhelm watched Anna and Alex carefully. Something was wrong, but he couldn’t figure out what. They had been so happy when they’d returned home earlier in the afternoon. What had happened in between then and now? Alex kept looking at Anna with concern. Had Alex told her she was pregnant?
Anna sat quietly with her eyes downcast. She was so pale. Wilhelm sighed. She was acting like a slave again. What had happened to make her feel inferior again? Was she ashamed of her pregnancy?
He glanced at his son and noticed him staring across the table at Gretchen. His eyes narrowed. If Alex started things up with Gretchen again, he was going to have a serious talk with him after dinner.
No...he wasn’t staring at Gretchen, he was staring at...Otto? Was he mourning that Anna was having a child that wasn’t his? Is that why they were having problems already? Wilhelm knew Alex wanted children. He missed his little girl. But there would be chances for other children after they’d rid Anna of Devin’s control. They’d talked about it many times. He thought Alex had come to terms with it. Maybe they needed to discuss it again.
*****
Alex stared at his soup, his appetite gone. Anna had withdrawn from him. Though she was sitting right next to him, she was as far away as she had been while in San Francisco. She wasn’t cold. That wasn’t in her nature. She was just...submissive. She would be quiet and obedient to him, but nothing more. The warmth and joy were gone.
But would it have been better had he told her about Otto in the library? He supposed there was no good time to tell his new bride that he’d fathered a son with his brother’s wife.
Did Kurt know? Alex doubted it. Gretchen wouldn’t have told Kurt until she knew how Alex took the news. Poor Kurt. He really had loved her when they married. Now? Now Alex knew more than he’d wanted to know about Gretchen.
What a mess.
Anna remained silent throughout the dinner, unless spoken to, and then she kept her answers soft and short. She kept her eyes downcast and ate all the food that was set before her. He hoped she wouldn’t be sick from eating so much.
She trembled when Alex put his hand on hers or put his arm around her shoulders. Why was she afraid of him?
Dinner was one of the longest he could remember. He intentionally had not looked at Gretchen the entire meal. He didn’t want her thinking that he approved of the news or that he wanted anything to do with her.
When the meal finally ended, Alex and Anna were given leave to go be alone and he eagerly led her out of the room and up to the third floor where his chambers were.
As he walked across the sitting room towards the double doors where his bedroom was, he began to doubt himself. He had been looking forward to tonight. To carrying her into his bedroom and slowly making love to her. Now, as she walked silently, slightly behind him, he didn’t know what to do.
He walked up the few steps that led to the doors and hesitated. He sighed and decided to do what he had planned. He opened the door, turned, swept her off her feet, and carried her inside.
Chapter Thirty-Eight
Anna looked around at the massive, rectangular room. The ceiling, twice as high as a normal room, was paneled in dark wood. Three diamond paned windows alternated with three square paned, each rising from about five feet above the floor to just below the ceiling. The wooden floors were covered in several places by red oriental rugs placed about the room. Along the left wall, matching bookshelves flanked a dark wood writing desk. Across the room, two wingback chairs sat on an oriental rug in front of a massive marble fireplace.
At the far end of the room a huge, intricately carved wooden canopy bed sat on a huge red oriental rug, framed by deep red curtains with gold tassels. A coat of arms carved into the headboard presented two crowned, double-tailed lions holding a shield with a crown on it. The shield had another crowned, double-tailed lion on it holding a sword. The whole thing was surrounded by an open tasseled curtain with a crown on top of that.
Anna had been here before, but in the dark. The night she first saw Alex. And now she was here again. As his wife. But it wasn’t the joyous moment she’d been expecting all day. No, she felt nauseous and tired. She wanted to sleep and make everything just go away.
> But she was sure Alex had expectations.
She turned to him. “How may I please you, my lord?” It came out her mouth without her thinking about it.
She saw his jaw clench and knew she’d upset him.
“I-I’m sorry, Alex,” she said quickly. The last thing she wanted to do was upset him. “I wasn’t thinking.”
*****
Alex looked down at his precious wife. He hadn’t meant to get angry at her words. He was angry at himself for making her feel the way she was feeling, not at her.
Alex took a deep breath and took her hand to guide her to the bench at the foot of his bed. “Schatzi,” he said in a soft voice. “I kept what Gretchen told me from you so that it wouldn’t ruin your day, but I can see that not telling you has probably made things worse.” He took another deep breath. “Anna, Gretchen told me that....” He hesitated. How best to tell her? “Otto is my son and not Kurt’s.”
She looked up at him with her big green eyes. “I know.”
“I.... You know? Did you hear us talking?”
Anna shook her head. “Well, yes, I heard you, but I didn’t understand you. But I know he’s your son.”
Alex didn’t know what to say and was quiet for a long minute, trying to understand. “How did you know?” he asked softly
“The way Gretchen acted at the table. She told me with her actions.”
Alex carefully counted to ten to keep himself from jumping up to find Gretchen and strangle her. How dare that woman! He had half a mind to kick her out of the house right then and there.
But she had his son.
Tears filled Anna’s eyes. “I’m happy for you, Alex,” she said softly. “At least you’ll have a child, even if it isn’t from me.”
“Anna...I knew when I asked you to marry me that you were told you could never have children.” He carefully constructed his thoughts before speaking, because when he married her, he knew she could have children. He wanted to be truthful. “Anna, Otto will never be my heir, despite what Gretchen thinks. He is illegitimate and not eligible.”
She nodded absently and stared at the ground. “Are you...happy about Otto? That you have a son?”
“Honestly, Anna. I don’t know how I feel about it. I’m furious at Gretchen right now. If you’re sensing any anger from me, Schatzi, please believe me, it has nothing to do with you, except that I’m furious at her for upsetting you.”
She didn’t say anything. He wondered if this would be a good time to tell her she was going to have a baby. Maybe it would lessen the sting of Gretchen’s actions.
He took her hand. “Anna....”
She looked up at him, worry in her eyes. “Yes, Alex?”
He gave her a tender smile. “Schatzi, about you not being able to have children...it’s not true. Under the right circumstances, you can get pregnant.”
She looked at him doubtfully. “Are you just trying to make me feel better?”
He shook his head emphatically. “No, Anna. I’m not. I know it’s not true.”
“How?” she whispered. She didn’t believe him, he could tell.
He cradled her cheek. “Because I believe you are pregnant right now.”
Her eyes grew big as she stared at him, then filled with tears. “Why would you tease me about that, Alex?” She stood to walk away, but he held her hand.
“I’m not teasing, Schatzi. My mother is convinced that you are. You’ve been nauseous, tired....” He grinned. “Your breasts are definitely fuller than they were the last time I saw you.”
Anna blushed. “I can’t fit into my bras.” She sat down and looked at him. “Are you sure?”
“My mother has known with each of Gretchen’s pregnancies. And a couple of cousins as well. She has excellent instincts.”
Her eyes sparkled for a minute and then grew sad again. “But it’s obviously not yours.”
He stroked her cheek. “I don’t care, Anna. I will raise it as my own...if you want me to.” He paused. “Do you...well, I thought it might be Ben’s baby. What do you think?”
Her face fell. “It could be any number of men’s, Alex. It could be Devin’s for all I know.”
He shook his head. “Anna, for you to trigger your body into conceiving there must be a deep emotional connection. I would assume that would have only occurred with Ben, am I right?”
*****
Anna nodded in answer to Alex’s question. “Yes,” she whispered. “He’s the only one I’ve been emotionally connected to for a long time. Until you.”
A tear rolled down her cheek and she put her hand on her stomach. Was it really possible that she was carrying Ben’s child? The thought overwhelmed her with joy and trepidation at the same time. Would Alex really want to raise this baby as his own?
“Schatzi, please don't doubt me. I love you. I am thrilled that you are pregnant. It gives me hope that we will have children together.”
She loved the idea of giving Alex children. She looked up at him and smiled, even though tears ran down her cheeks. “Ben’s mom would be thrilled.” Would he let her tell Katherine?
He put his hand on hers. “I’m sure she would be.” He pulled her close and kissed her head. “You don’t need to be upset about Gretchen, Schatzi. We will have our own children. Together.”
Joy suddenly overcame her and she flung her arms around Alex’s neck. “I’m really going to have a baby?”
Alex laughed. “Ja, mein Frau. You are going to have ein Baby. Nein, we are going to have ein Baby.” He kissed her firmly on the mouth. “Perhaps we should go practice making them so when it’s my turn we are ready,” he murmured against her lips.
Anna couldn’t help but burst into laughter. She felt so light. So good. She knew now why she’d been sick and tired. She wasn’t getting fat. She was having a baby! And now she wanted nothing more than for Alex to pick her up and take her to bed with him.
“I agree.”
Alex laughed in delight and picked her up and carried her to their bed.
Chapter Thirty-Nine
Anna woke with a grin on her face and snuggled closer to Alex. The room was cold, but he was very warm. He had once again proven what an incredible lover he was. She didn’t know how many orgasms she’d had, but they had each been incredible. And Alex...! Oh, my, she couldn't believe that he fit inside her, but he made her feel so good, once her body had adjusted to his size. They’d made love at least four times last night, each time better than the last.
He promised he’d go back to normal and Anna was somewhat relieved. She didn’t want him to have to go so slow every time they made love. She remembered how hard he had fucked her that one night and wanted him hard like that again...once she was satiated with the gentleness.
“What are you grinning at?” Alex asked in a raspy morning voice.
“You.” She traced around his nipple and he shivered. She leaned forward and bit it, making him groan. “Are you feeling better?”
“Mmm,” he mumbled. “Mostly.” He rolled over on top of her and nuzzled her neck. His cock pressed against her inner thigh.
She rolled her hips forward and pressed up against him. He moved forward, stopping at her entrance. She moaned and wiggled beneath him.
“Please, Alex,” she moaned. “I need you again.”
He chuckled and moved forward into her body, making both of them sigh.
*****
Two hours later, Alex and Anna were in the shower. He had washed her body all over and she was returning the favor. She ran her hands over his hard buttocks and he moaned softly. Kneeling next to him, she moved her hand down and reached between his legs to caress his balls.
He hissed and leaned his hand against the wall for support. She had such talented hands. He felt himself growing hard again. God, they’d made love so many times since last night, and he still could get hard? Even he was impressed with his stamina. Maybe that’s what the teasing at the Schloss was really for.
Her fingers explored backwards and brushed against his as
shole. It was tender from the previous night, but it felt good at the same time. Aside from the Elders it had been a while since he’d had sex with a guy.
Oh, he didn’t need to be thinking about that while his sweet little wife caressed him. He loved her. He liked women. A lot. If anything he was selectively bi. And by selectively, he meant that there were only a handful of men he would ever consider being with.
“I’m sorry, Alex. Did I hurt you?”
He opened his eyes and saw her looking up at him. He glanced at his erect cock and smiled. “Not at all, Schatzi. It...felt good.”
Her eyes widened. “It did?”
Had he frightened her? “Does that bother you?”
She smiled up at him and brushed the ring of muscle again. His eyes closed and he groaned as she caressed him there. Most women were apprehensive about their own asses, let alone a man’s. But what Anna was doing felt so incredible. And she did it willingly. He was the luckiest man!
He inhaled sharply when she pressed a finger against him.
“Oh, yes, Schatzi,” he breathed as she pressed inside him.
He stepped his legs further apart and hung his head as she finger fucked him and stroked his cock. He moaned when she slipped another of her slender fingers inside. He didn’t want to consider the possibility that she’d done this before, but she probably had. There was probably very little she hadn’t been forced to do. The thought saddened him and gripped his heart with guilt. He always felt guilty when he thought about her abuse. If only he hadn’t been so stupid, then maybe-
“Do you want me to stop?” she asked quietly, her hands stilling.
His eyes flew open to see her uncertain eyes. “Nein, Schatzi. Unless you want to.” He smiled at her. “It feels very good.”
He saw a spark of curiosity in her eyes before she looked away. He wondered what that was about, until she started moving again and forgot everything except her touch.
*****
Anna wondered if Alex was one of the guys Travis had hinted about that “swung both ways.” Most men didn’t like their asses caressed unless they did. But he was so manly. She couldn’t imagine him submitting himself to any man or going out and flirting with men.
The Life of Anna, Part 3: Embraced Page 22
