No, he couldn’t leave Anna here. Who knew what Devin would do? And now that Alex was...well, Alex’s “ownership” of Anna had passed to Wilhelm. It wasn’t as strong as Alex’s, but at least Wilhelm was an Elder. He could match Devin’s authority, if not override it.
*****
Wilhelm watched with concern as Anna stared out the window of the plane, grasping Alex’s wedding ring where it hung from a chain around her neck. She’d refused to let go of it when he’d given her a bath, so he found a chain so it wouldn’t continue to cut into her palm from grasping it so tightly.
They were on their way back to Germany. Wilhelm had made the decision to take Anna home with him and told Devin to fuck off when he protested. Wilhelm wouldn’t abandon Anna when she needed him most. It would be difficult having both Ilsa and Anna dependent on him, but he would manage. Maurice was with Ilsa now, as were the children. Ilsa was surrounded by loved ones and was a strong woman. The strongest woman he knew.
Anna...Anna had strength in her, but it had been so badly beaten down that she didn’t know it was there. But she would survive. Maybe he should encourage Kurt to look after her. With Alex gone, Kurt would have to take his place in the Brotherhood. It wouldn’t be inappropriate for Kurt to take his brother’s wife, after he divorced Gretchen, which Wilhelm would now encourage. He didn’t want Gretchen anywhere near the Brotherhood. Even if Anna wasn’t interested in Kurt, Gretchen was not a good wife for an Elder. It hadn’t mattered before....
Anna’s position in the family would not change. If she had been pregnant with Alex’s son, he would have inherited and become Elder after Kurt. Wilhelm had an option to provide Anna with children, if she wanted. Maybe it would help her in her grief.... But now was not the time to ask. She wasn’t functioning enough to make that sort of decision. She was barely functioning at all. He had to command her to eat and drink.
A memorial service would be held on Sunday for Alex and his men. Wilhelm had told Aaron and Isaak that he would fly over anyone who wanted to come. Many of the dancers had indicated their interest. That was good. Anna would be surrounded by her friends. But he couldn’t leave her vulnerable in San Francisco. Not until she was able to take care of herself.
Lili, the stewardess, walked quietly up to where Wilhelm sat. “Herzog, lunch is ready.”
“Thank you, Lili. We’ll be there shortly.”
She curtsied and walked away.
Wilhelm put his hand on Anna’s arm. He’d learned quickly that he had to physically get her attention before talking to her. She was so lost in her own little world, she heard nothing going on around her. If the plane fell from the sky, he doubted she would notice.
“Liebling?” he said softly.
She blinked, but didn’t turn to him.
“Let’s go eat.” He took her hand and she followed him meekly to the dining room.
When their plates were set before them, Wilhelm touched Anna’s hand. “Anna. Eat.”
She blinked and picked up her fork. He hated commanding her, but it was the only way to get her to take care of herself. She was unable to do anything on her own. Losing a baby or husband was terrible enough, but losing both within two weeks had pushed her over the edge.
She ate half of her food and Wilhelm was satisfied. It was more than she’d eaten this morning.
*****
The jet landed several hours later in a rainy Frankfurt. It taxied to the hangar and he saw the limo waiting for them. When the jet door opened, Lili handed him an umbrella and he took Anna’s elbow to lead her down the stairs. The door to the limo opened and a distraught Ilsa got out and ran to him.
“Wilhelm!” she exclaimed, burying her face in his shoulder.
Chapter Fifty-Nine
Anna felt the cold rain on her head and looked up. It was only for a second and then another umbrella sheltered her. It took her a moment to focus on the face in front of her. For a split second, she thought it was Alex, but no. It was Kurt.
She looked to her side and saw Wilhelm and Ilsa embracing and weeping together. Another reminder that she was alone. Wilhelm had a family to comfort. Why did he bring her back here? She could have been left alone in San Francisco. She wanted to be alone. She didn’t want to be around people.
“Hello, Anna,” Kurt said softly.
She looked up at him, but didn’t say anything. She didn’t smile. She looked back at the ground.
“Kurt, bring Anna to the car,” Wilhelm said, guiding Ilsa back to the limo.
“Kommen Sie, Engel,” Kurt said gently, and put his arm on her back to lead her to the limo. He let her in first and then closed the umbrella and handed it to the driver.
“Anna,” Ilsa said, reaching for her hand.
Anna stared at the floor and didn’t say anything, but didn’t pull away from Ilsa. She liked Ilsa. Ilsa had given birth to the man Anna loved.
Memories of her last morning with Alex threatened to surface, but Anna pushed them away. She didn’t want to cry, she didn’t want to think. She didn’t want to feel. Her numbness was her cocoon.
She vaguely felt the limo begin to drive away.
Kurt, Wilhelm and Ilsa talked around her, but Anna didn’t listen. Instead, she stared out the window.
Too soon, they were driving up the familiar drive to Alex’s family home. A huge lump filled her throat as the memories threatened to overwhelm her. Her eyes burned with tears that she didn’t want to release. Her hands shook as she grasped Alex’s ring hanging from her neck. Why had Wilhelm brought her back here?
They walked into the entryway a few minutes later. Wilhelm was instantly engulfed in the embraces of his daughters. Anna stood to one side and stared at the floor.
Ilsa came up to her. “I’ve had Alex’s room readied for you. If you’d like to freshen up, we’ll have dinner soon.”
Anna nodded absently and walked to the stairs. Greta grabbed her and hugged her before she made it there.
“Oh, Anna,” Greta said, hugging her tightly. “Please, Anna. If you need to talk or anything, come find me?”
Anna nodded absently again and walked up the two flights of stairs to her bedroom. She walked through the door and stared at the bed where she and Alex had made love. The bed where she had first seen Alex years ago.
She couldn’t sleep there.
She walked to the closet, picked out one of Alex’s sweaters and put it on, then curled up on the rug next to the fire crackling in the fireplace. Bathed in its warmth, she instantly fell into the oblivion of sleep.
*****
Wilhelm went to get Anna for dinner. He knocked on the door and walked in, knowing she wouldn’t answer. His heart stopped when he saw the empty bed. Where had she gone?
He looked around the room and saw her curled in a ball next to the fireplace, wearing one of Alex’s sweaters.
Maybe putting her in this room hadn’t been a good idea, but he didn’t want her to think that because Alex was dead her position in the family had changed.
He sighed. He felt helpless to comfort her. Her grief went beyond anything he could fully comprehend.
His heart was a constant source of pain since he found out about Alex and the others. He loved his son so much, and he had been so proud of the man he’d turned into. Wilhelm couldn’t deny that there had been moments when he’d doubted, but Alex had pulled through his immaturity to become a wonderful man.
Wilhelm blinked back the tears that threatened to fall. He needed to be strong for his family. There were things to be done and if Wilhelm lost it, his family would too. No, he needed to stay in control. For their sake.
Alex had made Anna so happy and vice versa. Watching the two of them together was the most beautiful thing he’d ever seen. Anna in love was a beautiful sight. She had changed from the scared, beaten down girl he’d first seen in the Hall of Devin’s Manor into a beautiful confident woman who knew her place in the world. Her dancing had been entrancing when he’d watched La Bayadere. It had been beauty in motion.
An
d now....
Her life was just one tragedy after another. How much more could she take?
“Anna?” he said softly. She didn’t lift her head and he walked over to kneel next to her. He brushed her hair back from her face. “Anna. It’s time for dinner.”
She got up without speaking. Her hair was a mess and she wore jeans with Alex’s sweater hanging down past her knees.
Wilhelm took her into the bathroom and brushed her hair, and then went into the closet to find something for her to wear. He returned with a long sweater dress and helped her into it. He stroked her cheek and found her skin cold, so he went back to the closet and returned with a sweater and slippers, put them on her and then led her downstairs to dinner.
*****
Dinner was subdued. Even Derek and Sofie were quiet. They knew their Uncle Alex wasn’t coming home anymore.
Gretchen sat quietly, feeding Otto some sort of mush. She had calmed down dramatically the last few months, which had surprised Wilhelm quite a bit. He needed to speak to Kurt about her, though. Well, he needed to speak to Kurt about many things.
Anna sat next to Wilhelm in Alex’s place and stared at Otto. Wilhelm had forgotten about the whole fiasco from their wedding day. Perhaps it wasn’t wise to have him at the table.
Maurice sat at the other end of the table, next to Ilsa. Wilhelm had invited him to stay so that Wilhelm could tend to Anna and Ilsa wouldn’t feel neglected. Ilsa and Maurice spoke softly together. A twinge of jealousy twisted his stomach. Maurice clearly adored Ilsa and Ilsa was very fond of him. Wilhelm was glad Maurice was here for her, but he couldn’t deny the tiny bit of jealousy.
Ilsa and Wilhelm had talked before he arrived home and they had both decided that making sure Anna was okay needed to be Wilhelm’s priority. Ilsa would be all right. She was surrounded by loving family. Anna needed someone she could count on and the most logical person was Wilhelm, especially since he was her Master now.
Maybe Wilhelm should take Anna to his bed tonight. He’d gotten used to sleeping with her and rather enjoyed it. He didn’t want her sleeping alone and for some reason didn’t like the idea of Kurt sleeping with her. At least not until he was accepted into the Brotherhood.
Yes. He would keep Anna with him. Maybe with his attention she would feel comfortable enough to start talking again. It worried him that she wouldn’t speak.
*****
“Anna, would you feel more comfortable staying with me in my room?” Wilhelm asked her after dinner.
She had gone with him to his study so he could finish a few things before bed. He’d said he needed to get in touch with the world Elders. There was a special Gathering when Elders or Sons died.
Anna looked at him with questioning eyes. What would Ilsa do?
“Ilsa is staying with Maurice. I realize that you might not be comfortable staying in the other room.”
The idea of staying in Alex’s bed alone was heart wrenching. Being with Wilhelm was some comfort. She gave him a tiny smile and nodded.
He sighed. “I’m glad, Anna. I...I like having you with me.” He looked down at his desk for a moment. “Do you want to stay here while I send out the email or do you want to go to bed?”
Anna thought for a minute. Sleep was a relief. She wished she could sleep all the time. “I think I’d like to go to bed,” she whispered.
Wilhelm looked at her in surprise and then nodded. “Kommen Sie,” he said, walking around to where she sat. “I’ll get you settled in and then come back.”
*****
Later, Anna lay in the dark, alone in Wilhelm’s bed. She was thankful for the warm blankets because the room was cold. It was strange, lying in Ilsa’s spot. But Ilsa had come and told her personally that she was all right with her being here. Anna didn’t want Ilsa angry at her.
Anna had fallen asleep briefly, but the strange room made strange sounds.
The door opened and she sat up. Wilhelm walked inside and closed the door.
“I didn’t mean to wake you,” he said softly.
“I was awake,” she said.
He walked into the bathroom and returned a few minutes later in his pajamas. He got into the bed and Anna curled up next to him, resting her hand on his chest and her knee on his thigh.
A wave of desire swept through her body. Sex. Sex would help her feel better. But would Wilhelm think poorly of her if she touched him?
She moved her fingers lightly on his chest over his shirt. When she ran her fingers over his nipple he inhaled sharply and grabbed her hand.
“Wilhelm...,” she whispered, almost pleading. She opened her mouth several times before coming up with something to say. “Please....”
He brought her hand to his lips and kissed her palm, then turned onto his side. His lips captured hers and he pulled her close.
In desperation and despair, they shared their grief and found comfort in one another’s arms.
*****
The room.
Moonlight poured through the window, spilling its silver light over the empty chair. The rest of the room was shrouded in darkness.
Whose room was it? Why was she here?
Chapter Sixty
“Holy shit,” Aaron mumbled under his breath as the Mercedes van drove up to Alex’s family home. He’d known Alex came from a wealthy family, but it never quite hit home. Until now. The other dancers around him were having similar reactions.
Alex never came across as arrogantly wealthy. He could be arrogant about his looks or his abilities with women, but he never made a big deal about his family. The castle-like structure at the end of the drive bewildered Aaron. Somehow the jet they rode in to get here didn’t quite have the same effect, although maybe it should have.
“Did you know about this?” Aaron asked Isaak, who sat next to him.
Isaak shook his head. “I had an inkling, but the reality is far more impressive.”
The van pulled up to the front of the house and a gray-haired man opened the door. Wilhelm stepped out a moment later, dignified as ever, but with grief evident in his face. When the door to the van opened, everyone stood and made their way into the house. Wilhelm greeted each dancer by name and thanked them for coming.
“Aaron,” Wilhelm said simply and they exchanged sad looks and handshakes.
“Thank you for bringing us over, Wilhelm,” Aaron said sincerely. “It means a lot to us.”
“Of course, Aaron. I wouldn’t have it any other way.”
While Aaron waited for Wilhelm to greet the other dancers he looked around. Man, was this place impressive! Kurt, Ilsa and Alex’s sisters came around a corner looking somber, but there was no sign of Anna.
Aaron walked up to Kurt and they shook hands in greeting. Kurt looked more sober than Aaron had ever seen him. He stood taller and had an aura of seriousness that hadn’t been there before.
“Hello, Aaron, I’m glad you could come,” Kurt said. “Have you met my sisters, Liesl and Greta?”
“I think I did once a while ago.” Aaron exchanged greetings with the two girls. They were both very pretty and looked like Alex and Kurt.
Jenna walked up to the group and greeted Kurt and introduced Matt.
“Where’s Anna?” Aaron asked Kurt quietly.
Kurt’s expression fell even more. “In the library. She spends all her time in there. But I’m sure she’ll be glad to see you. Let’s get you to your rooms and then I’ll take you to see her.”
*****
Anna stared out the window as usual. Wilhelm had said that once the dancers arrived, she needed to stay in Alex’s room. If she stayed with Wilhelm, her reputation would suffer and that he couldn’t do that to her. The other dancers wouldn’t understand the relationship that Anna and Wilhelm had. It was fine with her. Sex wasn’t helping her feel better. Nothing stopped the ache in her heart.
Suicide was once again tempting, but she had a feeling it wouldn’t work since she was half-Immortal. There was no relief. Nothing to take the pain away. Just an empty future
of heartache.
Something brushed her shoulder and she jumped and looked up to see Aaron standing above her.
“Hey Anna,” he said softly.
She turned back to the window and hugged her knees to her chest. Aaron sat on the other end of the bench.
“Kurt says you’re in here most of the time.”
Anywhere else hurts too much.
“Do you want to go for a walk outside?”
Anna looked back at him. A walk didn’t sound too bad. She shrugged her shoulders.
“That’s as positive a response as you’ll get,” said a German-accented voice from behind her. Kurt.
Kurt had been very attentive to her since she arrived. Gretchen had disappeared after that first night. She heard Derek and Sofie sometimes, but she didn’t hear any baby’s cries. Where was Otto?
“Kommen Sie, Anna,” Kurt said, taking her hand to pull her to her feet. He put a heavy sweater over her shoulders, and then he and Aaron walked her out the door to the terrace.
The fresh air felt good on her face. It was cold and crisp. Kurt and Aaron walked on either side of her and talked. Anna zoned out, but kept walking with them.
It felt good to walk, but she had no desire to talk.
*****
They walked around the gardens for about an hour. Aaron listened as Kurt told him about the discussion he’d had with Wilhelm about taking Alex’s place.
“I will be brought into the Brotherhood at the Gathering tonight,” Kurt said. “Then I must start learning everything that Alex has spent the last fifteen years learning.”
“You don’t sound especially excited about it,” Aaron commented. Not that he could really blame him.
“It is my duty now to step into Alex’s place. Someone must take over after Vati.” He glanced down at Anna. “And be able to watch over Anna as well. Vati will not leave her vulnerable to Devin.”
Anna didn’t respond to her name, which worried Aaron. “Has she started talking again?”
Kurt grimaced. “A little. Vati said she talked to him a few times, but I haven’t heard her. She does not hear you unless you get her attention first, either.” He stopped and put his hand on her shoulder. “Anna?”
The Life of Anna, Part 3: Embraced Page 33
