by E. S. Moore
With slow deliberateness, he pressed the flat of his palms on our heads.
At first, I felt nothing but the loopiness I’d already been experiencing. And then there was a tug. It sort of felt like a stitch being pulled, but it was inside my head, rather than on my skin. It started out painless, but as the pulling continued, it started to hurt.
And I mean it fucking hurt.
Sienna cried out and went rigid next to me. I would have grabbed her hand, but I was in no condition to do much more than suck in a pained breath. It felt like he wasn’t just trying to move our souls, but was ripping my brain straight from my spine.
Something tore in my head. I no longer felt my body. The pain was gone. I couldn’t see, couldn’t hear, couldn’t feel. It wasn’t so much that it was dark as it was an absence of everything.
And then it all came slamming back. The world shifted as pure agony flared into my disoriented head. I fell backward and clunked my head against the concrete floor.
“Finished!” Beligral said, jovially. “I’ll show myself out so you can check on them.” The last was obviously aimed at someone else.
I trembled on the floor, feeling terribly weak. The pain was mostly gone, as was the slimy feel of the jelly on my forehead, but I didn’t feel good at all. There was a blast of heat that swept over me like a warm blanket and then was ripped suddenly away as Beligral stepped through the tear.
I rose to a crouch, fighting hard not to be sick. I looked down at my hand and was surprised to see small delicate fingers. The floor felt hard beneath my now callous-free palms. My arms were thinner, far weaker than ever before. I dragged myself over to Beligral’s chair and pulled myself to my feet. I swayed there a moment, eyes closed until the world stopped trying to flip me back over onto my ass.
“Kat?” Ethan asked somewhere behind me. I couldn’t tell if he’d come into the circle or if he was still standing by the wall. “Sienna?”
I took a deep breath. “I’m okay.” My voice sounded strange, causing me to open my eyes. The chair was empty. I must have fallen out of it at some point.
And then it came back to me. I wasn’t in my body. I hadn’t fallen out of the chair. This body had never been in it.
If so, then where was my body?
I turned to my left to find Sienna on her hands and knees, head down much like mine had been. Her back was moving up and down at an alarmingly quick rate. She was making strange gurgling sounds deep in her throat.
Jeremy and Ethan were pacing outside the circle, acting as if they weren’t sure if they should come in or not. Beligral might be gone, but there was no telling what he’d done to us while he’d been there.
“Sienna?” I asked, still marveling at the strange sound of my voice. “Are you okay?”
Her head slowly rose. Eyes filled with need bore into me. Blood trickled down her chin as she grinned. Her upper lip lifted in a snarl, showing bloody, extended fangs.
And then with a growl of rage, she attacked.
17
Instinct took over.
Or at least, it tried to.
Sienna charged straight at me, eyes feral and hungry. I moved to try to flip her over my shoulder—a move I’d done at least a thousand times—but she moved too fast for me. She slammed into me, knocking me back over the chair, which probably saved my life. I hit the floor hard on my shoulder, just missing cracking my skull. Pain rocketed through my body as I rolled away and scrambled across the floor.
“Sienna!” Ethan screamed. He seemed frozen to the spot, staring in fear at the girl who was now in control of a full-fledged raging vampire body.
Jeremy grabbed a gun off the table, but didn’t aim it at anyone. He frowned at it a moment before tossing it back where he’d gotten it.
I couldn’t get to my feet fast enough, so I crawled toward them. I knocked over one of the candles in my haste to get away. Already hardening wax spilled across the dual circles. My knees ached from contact with the concrete floor and it felt like I’d broken my shoulder, though if I had, I wouldn’t be crawling anywhere.
Sienna screeched behind me. My voice sounded strange coming from someone else and I vaguely wondered if that was what I always sounded like or if Sienna was having a hard time adapting to her new vocal cords. Either way, I was in trouble.
Ethan grabbed me by the arms and hoisted me to my feet. He pushed me behind him as Sienna limped toward us. I think the only thing keeping her from running at us was the burns I’d suffered on my feet. I never thought I’d be thankful for such an injury, but hey, whatever kept me alive, right?
“Sienna,” Ethan said, holding out his hands. “Calm down.”
“Hungry,” she said, just before leaping at him.
I tried to pull him out of the way. I grabbed his shirt and yanked, managing to move him all of a few inches and knocking him off balance before she crashed into him. Ethan went down under her weight—my weight in reality. His head bounced off the concrete floor.
She bared her fangs at him. Blood dripped from her lips, splattered on his cheeks.
“Sienna, please,” he mumbled just as I screamed, “Sienna, no!”
I’m not sure which of us got through to her, but she paused before striking. She looked at Ethan and then turned confused eyes to me. I didn’t for a single second believe she was in full control of the vampire raging inside her, but that single moment might have saved Ethan’s life.
Jeremy crashed into her side just as a sneer crossed her face. They went tumbling across the room and smacked hard against the cage. The metal bars rattled as Sienna fought with all of her strength to be free of the werewolf. I could only watch as she dug her fingernails into his cheek in an attempt to rip his face clean off.
Jeremy screamed and bucked, causing her to lose her grip on him with only minimal damage. He bled freely as he rolled to his feet, grabbed the cage door, and flung it open. Sienna spun and charged at him. Jeremy didn’t try to get out of the way. Instead, he opened his arms and wrapped them around her, letting her momentum propel them both into the cage. They hit the far end with a rattle of metal and a scream of pained rage from Sienna.
I was glued to the spot. I’d never felt so weak in my life. Even when I’d been a Pureblood, I’d been stronger. I’d worked out constantly, honed my body to be able to withstand a vampire or werewolf ’s assault for the few seconds I would need to put a bullet in their brain.
But Sienna was different. She’d always lived at home, had never fought a supe before in her life. She wasn’t out of shape or anything, but there was little to no strength in her body. I felt crippled, inferior. If only Levi would hit me with some of his power now. I could really use the extra strength and speed.
Ethan dragged himself to his feet, looking a little out of it. He rubbed his head as he scanned the lab, until his eyes fell on where Sienna and Jeremy struggled. His hand froze and then slowly lowered. He took a hesitant step toward the fight and I thought that he might go in to help Jeremy subdue Sienna long enough to get the cage door closed.
Instead, a strange growling, keening sound issued from his mouth and he charged forward.
“Get off of her!” he shouted as he ran into the cage and aimed a kick at Jeremy’s head. He missed by inches.
“Ethan!” I sounded as terrified as I felt. “We have to.”
He turned on me just as Sienna pushed the stunned Jeremy away. She was on her feet and leaping so fast, I was sure she’d take Ethan down.
Jeremy got a foot up just in time. Instead of crashing into an unprepared Ethan, all of the air gushed from her lungs as her stomach met Jeremy’s foot. She staggered back into the cell, clutching her gut, but in no way was she incapacitated.
Jeremy scrambled to his feet. He grabbed Ethan by the back of the shirt and practically threw him across the room as he got them both out of the cage. He slammed the door closed just as Sienna rushed forward. She clawed at him through the bars as he slid the lock home and stepped away.
“Jesus,” he said, wipin
g blood from his face. “What in the hell just happened?”
“It’s not fair.” Ethan edged toward the cell, but jerked back when Sienna made a grab for him. “She doesn’t deserve to be locked up like this. She doesn’t know what she’s doing.”
“Exactly.” Jeremy frowned at him. I expected him to reprimand Ethan for trying to kick him in the head, but instead, he laid his hand on the other man’s shoulder and squeezed. “This is only temporary,” he said. “She might be in Kat’s body, but she’s still a vampire for the first time. Her mind wasn’t prepared.”
Ethan looked sick as he nodded. Jeremy studied him a moment, as if to make sure he wouldn’t try to unlock the door, before turning to me.
“What about you?” he asked. “Are you all right?”
I wanted to tell him I was fine, but that would have been a lie. I was trembling all over and my shoulder hurt horribly. “I couldn’t stop her,” I said. “She attacked me and I was completely unable to keep her from taking me down. I’m too weak.” How in the hell was I going to put an end to an angel like this?
Jeremy glanced back at Sienna and then turned back to me with a shake of his head. “It’s strange,” he said. “I know I’m talking to Kat, but all I see is Sienna. It’s really messing with my head.”
“Tell me about it,” I said.
Sienna sagged down to her knees, panting. Some of the rage had fallen away, but there was still an acute hunger in her eyes.
“It hurts,” she whispered. The blood had stopped dripping from her mouth, but her fangs were still extended. “I’m so hungry.”
“I’ll get her blood,” Jeremy said. He started to walk away, took one look at me, and altered his course. “After we get you somewhere safe.”
“I’m fine,” I said as he took my arm. “I’m just a little woozy.”
All this time, Ethan stood staring at Sienna in her cell. He didn’t speak, didn’t make a move toward her. Even though I couldn’t see his face, I knew his heart was breaking.
Jeremy tugged gently on my arm. I started to go with him, but shook him off. “One sec,” I said before walking over to the cage. I knelt in front of Sienna. She looked up and met my eyes. It was eerie since it was my face looking back at me.
“I’m going to take care of Levi,” I promised her. “As soon as I’m done, I’m going to make Beligral switch us back.”
Sienna’s nostrils flared and I knew she was trying to scent my blood. “No,” she said. “You shouldn’t have to suffer like this ever again.”
“Neither should you.”
I stood, wincing. My shoulder hurt far more than it should. I could move it fine, but something was definitely not right. I was going to have to figure out the capabilities of Sienna’s body and I was going to have to do it fast.
“We need to go,” I said, touching Ethan gently on the wrist. “Give her time to calm down. Jeremy will get her some blood. If you want, make her something else to eat. She’ll need that too.”
He nodded and tore his gaze from the trapped girl. He gave me a harsh look and I knew he was trying really hard not to hate me for what I’d done.
“Don’t you dare hurt her,” he said. “You’d better come back alive or I’ll . . .” He shook his head and walked away.
I let him go. It would take him some time to forgive me. Hell, I was struggling with it too. I’d never wanted this. If it hadn’t been for Ethan telling her about the demon’s offer, we could be working on another solution even now.
“Let’s go,” Jeremy said from across the room.
I walked past him, doing my best not to appear as weak and tired as I felt. Jeremy closed the lab door behind us, leaving Sienna alone, scared, and confused. Ethan was right when he’d said this wasn’t fair. I was going to make sure her suffering was worthwhile.
We were halfway up the basement stairs when my legs gave out. I just about smacked my nose on the steps, but managed to turn my head aside at the last second and cracked my ear instead. Weak wasn’t the word to describe how I felt. It felt like dying.
“Let me help.” Jeremy used his one good arm to lift me. He practically had to carry me all the way upstairs, taking only a short break before moving on to tackle the steps that led up into my room. We were halfway up when the urge hit.
It wasn’t pain like Beligral’s mark when he wanted to gain my attention. There were no marks on Sienna’s body as far as I could tell. This was a mental pain, an urge so strong, I very nearly knocked both Jeremy and myself down the stairs when I jerked and tried to push past him.
“No, you don’t,” he said, holding tight. “You need to rest.”
“I have to go,” I hissed. I didn’t just need to go to Delai. It was a burning desire so fierce, I knew I would die if I didn’t give in and head there right this very instant.
Jeremy refused to let me go. He clamped tight to me as he took the stairs one by one. I trembled in his grip, but thanks to my years of controlling my vampire rages, I was able to keep from fighting too hard. I felt like throwing up, felt like screaming in the purest of agonies.
The wave of need didn’t last long. I’m not sure if Levi could feel how exhausted I was or if something else had distracted him, but by the time Jeremy muscled me down the hall and into my room, I hung limply in his grip. I collapsed into bed and lay panting there. Sweat beaded my brow and my entire body ached from my recent struggles, both physical and mental.
“Are you going to be okay for an hour or so?” Jeremy asked. “I know where I can get some blood for Kat . . .” He frowned and shook his head. “For Sienna. Damn, this is confusing.”
I was too pooped to say much more than “Yeah.”
“I’ll have Ethan wait outside the door,” he said. “I’m worried he’s going to go downstairs and let her out. If you hear him, find a way to stop him.”
I nodded weakly. My eyes felt heavy. How long had it been since I’d actually slept? A pack of ravenous werewolves could attack the house and it was unlikely I’d be able to do much more than curl up into a little ball. I was that tired.
Jeremy stood there a moment longer. I could tell he was debating whether or not he should leave me alone. Finally, he reached into his pocket and removed his cell phone. He dropped it onto the bed next to me.
“If something happens, call Jonathan.”
One more weak nod. Jeremy’s voice sounded as if it was coming from a million miles away.
“I’ll be back soon.”
His footsteps faded. The bedroom door clicked closed. I tried to wait for the sound of the car starting up in the garage, but I’d had it. Darkness rushed in and for the first time since I’d been turned, I fell into a deep, natural sleep.
18
The sound of birds chirping woke me. I stretched and sat up in bed, somewhat dazed. Sometime during the night, I’d been moved so that when I woke, my head was on the pillow and a blanket covered me. I’d somehow slept through it, which wasn’t like me at all.
With a yawn, I rose and sludged my way across the dark bedroom, into the bathroom. I flipped on a light and jumped back in surprise when I saw my face.
Sienna stared back at me. It was strange knowing I was looking into a mirror and yet, not recognizing the face as my own. I ran my fingers down my cheek, stretching the skin as if I thought it might slough off, revealing the same old face I was used to.
“This is fucking weird.” Even my voice didn’t sound right.
I turned away from the mirror with a grimace. Smells and sights were muted from what I knew. I couldn’t hear as well as before either. It made me feel as if I was wrapped in cotton, or crippled, perhaps.
And then there was the whole washing thing. I really didn’t want to see Sienna naked, but if I was stuck with this body for any length of time, there was no helping it. I doubted I’d be able to go to Delai, find the summoner, kill him, and then get back to switch bodies before I started to stink.
I quickly stripped out of Sienna’s clothes, stepped into the shower, and tried to wash
her body without actually touching anything.
It’s my body now, I reminded myself. I needed to start thinking of it that way so that if I came across a situation where I needed to react quickly, I didn’t try to act like the vampire I once was. That would only get me killed.
Once I was clean, I dried off and hurried into my room to get dressed, pointedly not looking in the mirror as I passed. There wasn’t much that fit me right, but I managed to find an old T-shirt in the back of my closet that wasn’t too big and a pair of shorts that worked well enough once I strapped on a belt. I felt like a little girl playing dress-up with her mom’s clothes.
The sound of birds continued. My eyes were drawn to the sound.
My heart was in my throat as I crossed the room to the window. The blinds were taped to the wall so that no light could penetrate them. Heavy curtains hung over them for added protection. Ever so slowly, I pushed the curtains back and pulled the blinds away from the window.
Light struck me square in the face. I cringed back, expecting to feel burned and weak, but instead, the sunlight on my skin felt warm and comforting. I opened the blinds wider and looked out on a sunlit world I never thought I’d see again.
Tears sprung suddenly to my eyes, so I closed them. The sun warmed my flesh, sent my heart soaring. While I couldn’t see it directly, the sunlight lit up my eyelids so that they seemed to glow bright pink.
With a cry of pure joy, I spun and ran out of my room. I was crying hard now and couldn’t make myself stop. I didn’t know if it was the body or if I was just that overjoyed about what I’d felt. Either way, my emotions were getting the better of me. And right then, I didn’t care. All I wanted to do was feel the sun directly on my skin, revel in the light of day for the first time in a very, very long time.
I threw open the front door and ran out into the yard, heedless of anyone that might be lurking in the surrounding trees. I spread my arms wide as I raised my face to a sun that shone so bright, so strong, it was a wonder the entire world didn’t burn. A breeze played across my skin, warm and reassuring. I fell to my knees and cried.
