by Vikki Vaught
Helen’s voice shook as icy fear for her child filled her mind. “I’m so s-scared that I’ll l-lose the b-baby. I was thrown against the d-door hard. My s-shoulder and back are very painful, but other than some bruises and cuts, I think I’m all right. I’ll feel better when the doctor gets here and examines me. I’m beginning to warm up a bit. I was f-freezing out there!” Helen was still shivering, and her teeth were chattering as she tried to speak.
“Well, why don’t you try to rest? I’m sure that the doctor will be here soon. I’ll just go check and see if he’s arrived yet.” Cassandra hurried from the room.
Helen lay there, and the tears rolled down her cheeks. She didn’t understand why these things kept happening to her. There was no way that the carriage should have lost a wheel. Matthew was extremely careful to keep all their coaches in excellent condition at all times. He was very particular about anything to do with his horses. It felt as if someone were deliberately trying to hurt her.
Matthew arrived before the doctor and he hurried into the room. When he saw Helen lying there, he rushed to her bedside. “Helen, where do you hurt? Lady Ralston said you hurt your shoulder and that you have cuts and scrapes on your back. Oh my love, please don’t cry. I can’t stand to see you cry. I wish I could hold you in my arms, but I don’t want to hurt you.” Helen looked over at Matthew with tears running down her pale cheeks, and it just about brought him to his knees from fear of losing her.
Why did these things keep happening to her?
Taking a deep steadying breath, Helen said, “Oh M-Matthew, I’m so…so scared! I don’t want to l-lose the b-baby. I hit the door of the carriage hard, and now my shoulder hurts so much. I have cuts on my back and my b-bottom. Oh God, please don’t let me lose my baby!”
He sat down on the side of the bed and held her hand. As Helen cried, he felt so helpless. He was so afraid she would lose their child, and he knew that Helen would be devastated if that happened.
The door opened and the doctor entered the room.
Dr. Moore examined Helen, and when he was through, he said, “Lady Collingswood, you have bruised your shoulder. It isn’t dislocated again, but since you injured it before, I recommend that you use a sling for a few days. I’ve put some ointment on your back. The cuts aren’t deep and don’t need to be stitched. You’re going to be very sore for several days.”
“Doctor, what about the b-baby?” Helen asked, “Do you think…I’ll lose it?”
“Since you’re not cramping,” he replied, “I don’t think you’ll lose it, but it would be a good idea for you to stay off your feet for a week. If possible, you need to stay where you are instead of traveling back to Collingswood Hall.”
Leaving the doctor with Helen, Matthew went to find Lady Ralston. He found her in the drawing room. “Lady Ralston, the doctor doesn’t want Helen moved. I hate to impose on you, especially at Christmas time, but can she stay here?”
“Oh my, of course she can stay. That won’t be a problem at all. I’ll come with you now and let Helen know,” Cassandra said.
When Matthew returned to the room, Dr. Moore was giving Helen some laudanum for the pain so she could rest. When the doctor finished, Matthew led the doctor out of the room and asked, “Are you sure she’ll be all right and that she won’t lose the baby?”
While stroking his chin, Dr. Moore said, “I can’t tell you that she won’t lose the child, but since she’s not cramping that’s a good sign. If she’s going to lose the babe, it will happen in the next couple of days. If she makes it through them without having any cramping, then I feel sure that she’ll be fine. Just keep her in bed so she can rest.”
By the time Matthew got back to the room, Helen had fallen asleep. He looked over at Cassandra and asked, “Lady Ralston, would it be all right if I stay with my wife? I hate to inconvenience you, but I don’t want to leave her.”
Cassandra smiled sympathetically. “Of course you can stay. Helen needs you here with her. She’s very scared about the baby, and she needs your support. I’ll leave you now, but I’ll have a tray sent up for you.”
Matthew stayed by Helen’s side all through the night, but she continued to sleep. The next day, she woke up and smiled over at Matthew when she saw him. “Have you been sitting here long? I’m feeling much better this morning. Even my shoulder isn’t hurting as much. It just aches a little, and I can feel all the scrapes. I’m sure my back is covered with bruises. Where did you sleep last night?”
Matthew rubbed his jaw, covered with a day’s worth of beard, as he answered, “I’ve been here all night. I didn’t want you to wake up alone. I’m so relieved that you’re feeling better. I was so worried when I got the message telling me you’d been involved in an accident.”
“Oh Matthew, you didn’t need to stay here last night. I would have been fine. I just don’t understand why I keep having these accidents.”
Matthew was gravely concerned, but puzzled at the same time, as he contemplated yet another near-fatal accident. “I’ve talked to the coachman, and he checked out the carriage. He seems to think it’s been tampered with. It’s obvious that someone is deliberately trying to hurt you, but I can’t imagine who would do this. I’m going to stay with you this entire week. I’ve sent to Collingswood Hall for some of our clothes, so they should be here shortly. Sally is also coming to help take care of you. Let me ring for some breakfast.”
“I’m famished, so food would be wonderful. Matthew, you don’t need to stay here with me. I’ll be fine as long as I do what the doctor says. I’m not experiencing any cramping at all, and that’s what the doctor said would happen if I were going to lose the baby.”
“I want to stay with you. Helen, I love you and can’t imagine my life without you. I know you’re very upset with me right now, but I just want you to remember that I love you, and I’ll do anything for you. I pray that someday you can return my regard.”
“Matthew, it will take me some time to get over what you told me the other night, but we’re married, and I’ve begun to care about you. I’m sure that with time I’ll move past this.” Matthew heard the pain in her voice, and it ate at his soul, knowing he’d caused it.
There was a knock on the door, Helen said, “Come in.”
Cassandra entered the room. “Good morning. How are you feeling today? I’ve been thinking that since you’ll be here for Christmas that you must send for the children so Christina and Catherine won’t be alone for the holidays. I’m sure my sons will enjoy their company.”
Helen looked at Cassandra with gratitude in her eyes. “I’m feeling much better this morning. Thank you for thinking of the children, but I hate to be so much trouble.”
Cassandra smiled. “This is no imposition at all. We’ll enjoy the company, and I’m sure the children will love it.”
“Lady Ralston, thank you so much for your kindness. Are you sure about the children?” Matthew asked. “We hate to impose on you any more than we already are.”
“It’s no problem at all. I’m sure you would do the same thing if I’d had an accident and needed to stay with you. It will be fun.”
Meanwhile, on the other side of town, when Cecilia heard that Helen had survived yet another attempt, fury surged through her body and she was throwing things again. Since all her figurines were broken, she picked up a small table and threw it against the wall, causing a picture to fall to the floor. All afternoon and well into the evening she paced back and forth as she continued to rage. Her servants gave her a wide berth since she was shouting and kept throwing things. Finally, Cecelia began to calm down after several glasses of brandy. She continued to mull over how this could have gone wrong.
How could Louis be so incompetent?
The bitch had the best luck in the world. There was no way she should have survived that carriage accident and still be pregnant. Oh, all this was so unfair! The bitch was already starting to show, which meant she must be close to five months along. She couldn’t give Matthew a son.
Th
at evening, when Louis finally showed up, she walked over and slapped him as she screamed, “You promised me you would make sure she died, and again you have bungled the job. From what I understand, she wasn’t even seriously injured, and she’s still carrying that brat. You could have at least caused enough damage for her to lose the baby. I tell you I want her dead now!”
Cowering in front of Cecilia, Louis said, “I’m sorry. I just knew that she would be killed when the carriage rolled over on its side and slid on the ice. The carriage must have slid fifty feet. I’m not sure why she wasn’t hurt.” Louis, hesitantly, continued, “Cecilia, I think we’re going about this all wrong. The next time she goes out on her own again, I’ll abduct her, and once I get her away, then I’ll do the deed. This time I promise I’ll not fail you. I’ll make sure she dies!”
Cecilia began to calm down and thought about what Louis said. Maybe they were going about this all wrong. If they abducted her first, then surely Louis would be successful in killing Helen. Once he had the bitch within his grasp, her luck would have finally run out. They could still make it look like an accident. “All right, Louis. I like this plan, but just make sure you succeed this time. I want that bitch dead, and it needs to be soon. If she has that baby, it will ruin everything. Continue to watch her, and the next time she leaves the house alone, grab her.”
“I promise, I won’t let you down again,” Louis replied, then left Cecilia’s house.
Why did this have to be so hard?
Oh, why did Matthew have to marry that bitch?
Cecilia continued to fume about this. Her mind was obsessed with killing Helen. She just knew that once Helen was out of the way, she could convince Matthew to marry her. After all, he had found her quite alluring until he decided that he needed to marry. It was a big mistake on her part to not have seen this coming when the old earl had died. Well, she would make sure she didn’t make the same mistake again. Once the bitch was out of the way, she’d make sure she got pregnant so Matthew would marry her!
Chapter 20
Winter 1821
Since Helen was worried about their plans to distribute the baskets, Matthew went and made sure Mrs. Smith got them ready. He asked Margaret to help him, and they delivered the baskets the day before Christmas. His tenants were so appreciative that some of the wives cried, and they all told him to tell Lady Collingswood to get well soon. Lady Ralston invited Margaret and Peter to come and celebrate Christmas day with them so they wouldn’t have to celebrate alone.
On Christmas morning, Matthew carried Helen downstairs so she could participate. Matthew gave her a beautiful blue topaz pendant with matching earbobs. “Oh Matthew, these are so gorgeous. Thank you so much. I just love blue topaz, and they’ll go so well with my new dinner gown.”
“I wanted to get you something that would go with your gorgeous blue eyes.” Matthew picked up his present from Helen. As he opened the box, a new pair of black leather riding gloves fell out. “Thank you, Helen. I really needed these. My old pair is coming apart at the seams.”
After the adults exchanged their gifts, they brought the children down so they could open up their presents. Christina and Catherine were thrilled with their new dollhouse. It looked like a fairy castle similar to the one painted on their bedroom wall. Their new dolls were dressed like medieval princesses, and they even had knights to go with them. Cassandra’s sons got knight costumes with small wooden swords, and they were swinging them around and having a jolly time with them.
The rest of the day went well. The meal was delicious and the conversation delightful. After dinner, everyone went into the drawing room and took turns playing cards. Helen and Matthew played with Peter and Margaret first and won the set. Then they played a game with Lord and Lady Ralston.
While they were playing, Helen turned to Cassandra. “Matthew and I want to thank you for having us. I feel so bad about having to be here during the holidays. I hope we’re not taking away from your family time. We appreciate your generosity so much. Thank you for allowing the children to come, and Peter and Margaret. We’re having a marvelous time.”
“Helen, it’s been delightful having you here. I love to have company, and your children are so well behaved. They’ve actually helped keep my sons entertained. I feel as if we have gotten to know each other much better.” They finished the game, and this time Lord and Lady Ralston took the set. Cassandra called for tea, and shortly after that, Peter and Margaret left, and everyone else retired to bed.
They were all having such a good time that they ended up staying through the New Year. By then, Helen’s shoulder was no longer bothering her, and her back was feeling much better, so she was allowed up again. Dr. Moore had checked Helen and pronounced her fully recovered and told them that she shouldn’t have any more problems as long as she didn’t have any more accidents. Helen was now more than five months along, and the baby was constantly moving. After the doctor left her room, Helen cried, “Matthew, come here! The baby is moving!”
Matthew touched her belly, and this time he felt a very faint flutter. He was awed by the experience. “Helen, thank you. I know you’re still angry and hurt, but I appreciate you letting me share the joys of your condition. I remember very little of my first wife’s pregnancy.”
“Matthew, I’d never deny you the opportunity to experience the wonder of your child. You’re the father, and even though I’m still angry and hurt, I want you to participate.”
Shortly after the holidays, Peter received a message from his family asking him to come home right away. His uncle had had an apoplexy. Matthew lent Peter and Margaret one of his coaches so they could go to Peter’s uncle.
Gregory showed up right after Peter and Margaret left. Gregory had stayed with friends for the holidays, and the school term had just started, so Matthew knew something had happened. With an expression of frustration on his face, Matthew asked, “Gregory, why have you come home, the school term just started? What’s going on? Have you gotten yourself in trouble again?”
Gregory belligerently replied, “I’ve been expelled from school, and they told me they would never let me back in. I had an affair with the wife of one of my professors and got caught. I was bored with school anyway, so I’m glad they kicked me out!”
Just what he needed, when he was so worried about Helen. Gregory was surely ruining his life. Matthew knew he was going to have to take drastic measures, “At this point, I think you need to consider a career in the military. I’ll buy you your commission. Now that you aren’t in school, you need to find something to do. If you don’t want to be in the army, there’s also the navy. Which would be better for you?”
“I think I would rather try the navy. I like the idea of traveling to foreign places, and I’ve always loved the sea.”
“I have a friend who has his own ship. I’ll write him. Even though we aren’t involved in a war, there’s still plenty of opportunity for you to have a productive career in the navy.”
Matthew wrote to his friend Captain Stephen Martin about Gregory. He hoped Gregory would find his way in the navy. If he continued to get in trouble, he would have no choice but to cut off his allowance and ask him to leave Collingswood Hall. It would pain him greatly to do that, but he refused to allow Gregory to continue down the destructive path that he was on.
A week later, Captain Martin wrote back and told Matthew to send Gregory to Plymouth since his ship would be there undergoing some minor repairs. Gregory left for Plymouth the next day, and he actually seemed excited about it. Matthew was hopeful that the navy would work out for his brother.
Matthew received a letter from Margaret, and he shared it with Helen. Peter’s uncle had passed away, so Peter was now Viscount Hartford. The letter was filled with information about the house and how she was going to enjoy redecorating it. Peter’s estate was in a small village about five miles from Basingstoke. and Margaret thought she would be happy there. They were about four hours from London, so she liked the idea of being close to town. Si
nce they were in mourning, she wouldn’t be able to participate in the season, but they could still go to London and participate in the other amusements it had to offer.
Soon everything began to settle down, and Helen was getting bigger every day. She was now six months along, and Matthew was treating her as if she were a precious jewel. Each day, despite her feelings of betrayal, she fell more in love with him. There had been no more accidents, but they still didn’t have any answers about who had been behind them. Matthew didn’t want Helen to go anywhere without him, so whenever she went to visit Lady Ralston, Matthew took her.
Helen had finally been able to go to some more committee meetings and had visited the orphanage again, but since she was definitely showing now, she wouldn’t be able to get too heavily involved until after the birth of her child. It bothered her that she couldn’t go places without Matthew, even though she loved him desperately. She wasn’t used to being so constrained. Of course, until they found out who was behind her accidents, she knew it would be foolish for her to travel alone.
Kathryn had finished the portrait of the twins and sent it to Helen. When Helen unwrapped it, the picture astonished her. It was wonderful, and she knew Matthew was going to be so pleased when she gave it to him for his birthday. While Kathryn had always been very talented, it was obvious that the Art Institute had improved her work dramatically.
Matthew’s birthday was on the twentieth of February, which was coming up in a few days, so Helen decided she’d do something special. She met with Cook and planned a special dinner, having her fix all his favorite foods. Cassandra had recently gone to Plymouth, so Helen had her pick out a riding crop for Matthew. She knew he needed a new one, and she would give it to him as an extra gift for his birthday.
