The rain beat down on us, but the cold was nothing compared to the pain that clenched my heart. Aki didn't move at my call; his eyes remained fixed on two gravestones that were at his feet.
I closed my eyes, tears rolled down my cheeks at seeing Aki in so much pain. First his sister. Now his parents. Why?
I walked up to him, allowing my hands to slide around his waist; I pressed my body against him in a hug. I knew this small comfort would do nothing to warm his cold, broken heart. But the least I could do was remind him I was here. I promised to be there for all of my men in times of despair. He needed my love and I didn't care if he tried to push me away. I'd fight to stay by his side.
"Storm..." he whispered, on the verge tears.
"I'm here," I spoke gently. I let go of him, giving him a chance to turn around and face me.
His green eyes filled with tears and revealed his agony and pain. "Why? Why do I lose everyone I care about? Am I cursed or being punished for being who I am or what I am? If so... I don't want to be close to anyone anymore. I don't want to lose you too," he confessed.
"I'm not going anywhere, Aki."
"You don't know that!" he yelled.
"Akihiro, I won't leave your side. You can't assume you’re cursed. Life will take its course and when it’s time for us to leave, there’s nothing we can do. Your parents and sister didn't deserve to die. They were taken before their time and no words can convey my anger and sadness. But I won't let them die in vain. I'll find the culprit and you will be there with me when I do," I vowed.
He stared at my confident expression and I could see the internal debate going on behind those eyes. I took a step forward and leaned up to kiss him. He needed to know he would never be able to push me away. I would always love him and help him find justice, just as I loved the others and would always be there for them.
He returned my kiss, wrapping his arms around me. When he broke the kiss, he pulled me into a hug and cried. Long and hard he sobbed in my arms as the rain continued to beat down on us.
I rubbed his back soothingly and hoped in this moment, he'd be able to rise from his heartache. This world was nothing but cruel, but I wouldn't let the harsh realities of life take my men away from me.
No matter what, I'd protect them and give them as much love as I could. Just as they had done for me.
"Crimson? Wake up," Akihiro’s soft voice urged.
"Woof?" Uru barked quietly before she began whimpering.
I opened my eyes to a blurry image as tears rolled down my cheeks.
When my vision cleared, I saw Aki staring down at me with a worried expression. I felt Uru’s nose nudge my cheek before she began licking my face.
I blinked a few times and let the tears fall. The dream was so sad and my heart ached for Aki. Even if to me, it was only a dream, I knew it was one of Storm's memories and the events had already come to pass.
"Crim? What's wrong? Why are you crying?" Aki looked at me with a worried expression.
I closed my eyes and shook my head. I didn't want to talk about it now. It felt like the wound of his sadness was fresh in my heart and the only words that would come out of my mouth were how sorry I was that I hadn't been there.
It wasn't my fault I'd missed out on the hardest moments in the guys’ lives. We didn't know one another then. Yet, each night when I slept, I shared a moment with each of the guys. Whether it was a steamy dream with Quil or a running session with Malachi. Magic practice with Haru or creating weapons with Itsuki. I'd dream of night walks through the towns with Yoshi and thrilling adventures with Aki.
Last week, my dreams had been filled with Storm's memories of when she was alive with her men who loved her unconditionally. Their happiness made me wake up overjoyed and ready to tackle the day. But this week had been filled with sad memories and I just couldn't handle it anymore. I heard Aki sigh and felt as my body was lifted into his arms.
I'd recently got caught up working on commissions. They’d only tripled since I'd took the guys’ advice and changed my pen name to Crimson Storm and added the logo Aki had created for me. I had been so busy working, I’d fallen asleep working on the latest piece.
He carried me to my room and laid me on my bed. I heard Uru jump up and cuddle next to me. Even with Uru next to me, I felt alone, and it was times like these where I wished James was here.
But he wasn't. He hadn't been here for a week, only coming in to pick up clothes for training or to say he left this or that. I knew our relationship was falling apart because of the whole Storm situation, but this wasn't how I thought he'd act.
Why couldn't he be here for me? Why was he acting like this was all my fault? I'd done so much for him and done everything I could to try and make him happy.
If he wanted to go out with his friends and didn't want me coming along, I obeyed. Any time he had a family get-together and didn't want me coming along, I stayed at home alone. For years, I'd let him have his way for the sake of his reputation, keeping our ‘relationship’ in the dark.
He was my first kiss and I let him take my virginity so he would be happy. I always tried to please him. Now the one time I wanted to do something right, and help the guys who'd shown nothing but compassion and care when I was in need, he was punishing me by not being here.
"Aki," I whispered through sobs.
'Yes, Crim?" I opened my tear-filled eyes to see him kneeling down next to the bed. He didn't abandon me or leave like James would have done if I was really depressed. He wouldn't budge unless I asked him to and my gut told me that was how he always was. He would never abandon someone when they were in need.
"Can you stay? Please?" I whispered.
He gave me a soft smile and nodded. Uru got up and moved to lay up against the wall until Aki and I were settled. He pulled me into his arms and let me cry into his chest while Uru stretched across our legs.
"Crim. What have you been dreaming about as of late?" Aki looked down at me.
I was silent, pressing my head against his chest. His hand soothingly went through my hair.
"Please, Crim? I can't keep waking up to you whimpering. The others have noticed and we're all worried. I get you don't want to depend on us, but just this once, let me know what’s going on, please."
"Why do you guys care? My boyfriend doesn't give two shits about me, yet you all show so much compassion for me. I don't deserve to have you all. Storm deserved it. Not me!" I cried.
"If we have to tell you over and over again, Crimson, we will. We aren't in your life just because you carry a piece of Storm inside you. Sure, it's what connected us to you initially. And maybe to some, they would think it’s rude or offensive that we're attempting to move on so quickly from loving Storm. I can't say that we all love you, but we’re interested in trying with you in the near future. You're so humble, despite the world treating you so poorly, to the point you think we're concerned about you for our personal gain or pity. We're here because we want to be, Crimson. We are here for you. You don't need to suffer alone. Please let me in," Aki whispered.
I let his words sink in and I knew he was right. All of them had comforted me in different ways this week, whether it was something simple like making sure I drank and ate when I got so caught up in my art, or bigger things like carrying me from the couch and putting me into bed. They always made sure Uru was fed, and she too did her part to keep me company.
I knew it was rude to continue pushing them away, but I didn't want to open myself up again. I was trying to act blind to everything that was going on, but everything felt like it was crashing down around me. I'd be twenty-three soon and I felt so alone. I didn't have friends, my family hated me, and my boyfriend was ashamed of me.
I tried to act like I was strong and tough. I worked hard to prove to the outside world that despite all the rumors and neglect I received throughout the years, I was still trying to achieve something. But I was tired of having my hopes shattered over and over again. I was only human; there was only so much I could take.
"It’s Storm's memories. Since the day we came back to my place, every night I've had a different dream. Well, it’s a memory in a form of a dream. At first, I didn't mind. They were happy memories and I got to see them through Storm’s eyes. I got to feel her joy and love for each of you...and with each memory, I came to like you guys more and more. I know it’s stupid. No, it’s crazy. I shouldn't be letting her memories affect me. But then I spend time with you and get to learn more about all of you each day. These days with you have been the best I’ve ever experienced," I confessed. I pulled away and sat up to wipe away the tears that rolled down my cheeks and continued to vent.
"Every day, I have the privilege to wake up early and enjoy morning runs with Malachi. Even Haru and Itsuki who both suck at running join because they want to. I get to spend time cooking and eating with all of you, trying different meals from various backgrounds and cultures. You and Quil have helped me with my self-defence and have given me tricks on how to fight people twice my size. Yoshi's been teaching me magic spells and incantations that I never got the opportunity to learn when I was young. You guys are all investing your time in me when I may revert back to a human."
Uru whimpered, walking over to lay in my lap.
Aki sat up and was listening to all the thoughts that spilled out of my lips. I just wanted to be heard and now that I had gotten the opportunity, I couldn't seem to stop.
"I'll lose all my powers and bam! I'll just be Crimson. Not Crimstorm or Crimson Storm. I'll be Crimson Arashi, the child of Konashi and Mosuki Arashi who has no powers and is just human. Everyone will go back to ignoring me, wishing I never existed. James will probably either leave or continue his juggling nonsense with our so-called relationship and the only thing left I'll have is my art. At the end of the day, I'll be alone and always will be," I confessed, putting my head down to cry.
"You're not alone, Crimson," Aki whispered.
"I am, Akihiro. For my whole life, I've been alone. Anyone who comes close to me either disappears or is forced to leave. Hotaka Jiyuna used to be my mom's best friend and he'd pay attention to me, even if it was only during his visits. The moment I started looking forward to his visits, he stopped coming. I got close to Hakua, bam! My father sends her to the mountains and makes it ten times harder for me to see her. I had to learn everything by myself and make my name known in the art industry with no one’s help. You can't guarantee my father won't do the same and kick you guys out of my life too."
I glared up at him. "He always destroys my happiness. Anything that will make me enjoy life is taken away because I don't deserve it. I've made his life a living hell so I deserve this as punishment. He's already told you guys to leave because he knows! He saw how you guys wanted to defend me unlike James who stood back and did nothing. It's because of me that you guys can't find refuge and concentrate on who killed Storm. I'm holding all of you back."
I looked down to Uru who met my gaze. Her pink eyes looked sad which only made me cry harder.
"The moment the crystals are rediscovered and the culprit or culprits who killed Storm received their justice...you guys will go too. Even Urufu will leave me."
"WOOF!" Uru argued, shaking her head.
I gave her a sad smile and wrapped her in my arms. I didn't want to lose her either.
"Crimson, give me your hand," Aki instructed.
I gave him a perplexed look, but Urufu seemed to understand and moved out of my lap to sit next to me. Her nose nudged my right hand over and over again.
"Why?" I whispered.
"Trust me," he reassured.
We shared a look and I sighed, lifting my right hand and placing it in his outstretched left hand. He closed his eyes.
"I, Akihiro Tomashuna swear to not leave Crimson Arashi's side unless she deems so. I will protect her and show her the joys of life. No matter what outside forces that want us to be separated, I will fight and stay by Crimson's side and only leave when she no longer wants me," he vowed.
My eyes went wide in shock as I watched the orange-gold magic circle appear between our joined hands.
"WOOF!" Uru placed her head on top of our hands and another magic circle formed in white. She howled softly as if confirming Aki's words and both magic circles vanished with a poof — flecks of glitter in white, gold and orange fell down and faded.
I felt a little dizzy, but it wasn't as bad as when I'd asked James to make an oath of secrecy regarding the guy’s location. We remained sitting in silence, as the shock of what Aki just did finally clicked in my brain.
"You...just did an oath!" I practically shrieked, but it came out more like a little mouse squeak.
Aki gave me a confident smile while Uru stood up and began to howl quietly as if she was singing. "I did," he retorted.
"You...you can't do that," I argued.
"Why not?"
"You just took an oath to stick with me for like forever. That's like marriage!"
He rolled his eyes. "It's not like marriage. I would need a ring for that and I don't want to deal with five other guys right now," he mumbled.
"Are you listening to the words that are coming out of your mouth? Akihiro! You just completed an oath to stay with me. You too, Urufu!" I looked at my familiar who paused mid-howl to blink innocently at me.
She then gave me a happy expression before walking back into my lap. "WOOF!" She began licking my face.
"Gah. Urufuuuuu." I giggled at the ticklish sensation.
Aki smiled at the exchange and waited for Uru to settle down before he spoke. "Storm Yuna taught me a lot of things over the years. She was there for me when my sister died. She was there for me when my parents were murdered. And when Storm died...I had a dream. I didn't understand it and it honestly pissed me off at first," he confessed.
"What was your dream?" I was curious as to why it would have pissed him off to see Storm one last time.
Aki smiled and met my gaze. "She told me to move on. She said she’d known somewhere deep within that she wouldn't live long enough for us to fulfill the promises we made, but she was foolish and hadn’t listened to her gut. Now she was gone and had left us all with broken hearts. But someone new would come into our lives and she told me not to look back," he confessed.
Uru whimpered, moving over to comfort Aki.
He grinned, ruffling her white fur before continuing. "When I woke up the morning of her funeral, I was so angry I didn't even want to go to the ceremony. When I talked with the others, they all mentioned having similar dreams that same night. She told them all we would find someone new and it would be foolish for us to pass it up."
"So...you think that person is me?" I didn't know how I felt about this revelation, but Aki didn't let me think on it, reaching for my hand and squeezing it gently to get my attention.
"I don't know. Maybe it is you or maybe it’s someone else. Who knows? But the guys and I agreed we wouldn't fall in love or even be interested in anyone just because Storm said so. When my eyes landed on you in the alleyway, when James and Haru were resuscitating you..." he trailed off, looking like he was trying to find the right words.
"I felt the same pain in my heart. The same heartache I had with my family and with Storm. I stood there, completely lost as to why a stranger had such an immediate impact on me. And the others have said they felt the same. Haru would have never healed a stranger for his own personal reasons, but without a second thought he threw himself to the ground and began doing compressions and trying to restart your heart like he'd known you for years."
Haru. I didn't know much about him yet, having just begun my magic lessons with him a few days ago, but he said so himself that he didn't like using his powers on others unless he was ordered to.
I stared into Aki's green eyes as he continued. "When we brought you to your family’s house, we agreed we would just wait it out. With how the Council acted regarding Storm's case, we didn't have much hope of you cooperating with us. But when you woke up and Yoshi talked to you, he was moved. He explained that he kn
ew you would do well and maybe it would be okay to give you a chance. Just as friends or partners trying to solve Storm's case."
"But then we got to know you. Little by little, day by day, until we’d all been together for about four weeks. I've thought hard about this and I know it may seem rushed to move on so quickly...but I wouldn't mind trying with you. I loved Storm and there’s a part of me that will always love her. But if she wants me and the others to love again, I would like to try with someone as humble, strong-willed, and inspiring as you," Aki finished.
I stared at him in complete shock. To have a man express his vulnerability and feelings the way he just had left me speechless. Not once had a man ever said they wanted to date me.
Even with James, it was me who asked him if he wanted to try a relationship, and that was honestly just because I was lonely and curious. We both wanted companionship, but it had been for all the wrong reasons.
Aki gave me a wide smile which tugged at my heartstrings because for the first time since meeting him, he looked genuinely happy.
"Just give us a shot to stay by your side. Let us prove to you that, regardless of who you are, Crimson Arashi, we won't abandon you. It doesn't matter if you stick with James or not. We'll be here, whether as friends, protectors, or anything you want us to be," Aki vowed, bowing his head to me.
"Woof!” Uru howled quietly and bowed her head too.
I smiled at the both of them and let the last of my tears roll down my cheeks as I let down the invisible walls that had shielded my heart for so many years.
"Okay."
Maybe this was what Storm Yuna wanted. She told me to love these men and accept them and their flaws. I wasn't perfect and I didn't know what the future had in store for us, but maybe the power of healing would mend our broken hearts.
And maybe, I'd learn what real love was.
"Just a little more, Crim," Haru encouraged.
"But I'll burn something. Like the carpet or the sofa," I said through pants as I tried to maintain the ball of fire cradled in my hands.
Taming the Storm (Crimson Storm Chronicles Book 1) Page 14
