by M. A. Hunter
‘How’s the inspector coping?’
‘She’s obviously disappointed that she wasn’t able to keep Natalie alive, but she’ll receive specialist counselling… which reminds me—’ He reaches into a pocket, pulls out a laminated flyer and hands it over. ‘I highly recommend the two of you seek some counselling too. PTSD can be a silent killer in its own way.’
I take the flyer, recalling the counselling I was forced to attend after Anna’s disappearance, and then my eyes widen in panic. ‘Oh God, I just remembered I’m supposed to be meeting Jack.’ I look down at Maddie, not wanting to leave her alone.
‘Go,’ she urges. ‘I’ll be fine, I promise.’
Chapter Nine
Now
Hyde Park, London
Hurrying through the bitter drizzle, I’m annoyed at myself for running late. I know how keen Jack Serrovitz has been for today to happen, and I promised I wouldn’t allow Maddie’s ability to drone on to get in the way of making a good first impression. I’m sure there’s probably a more direct route from London Bridge to Marble Arch, but I’m not a Londoner and I’m not yet au fait with how the underground network operates. I know there are different lines and a bazillion stations, but how they all interconnect is still beyond me. In fact, there probably was a quicker pedestrian route I could have taken, rather than relying on a black cab, but given everything that’s happened so far this morning, it was the simplest choice – and God knows I could do with some simplicity in my life right now.
I asked the driver to drop me at Marble Arch station, as Rachel had told me that was a short stroll from the entrance of Winter Wonderland at Hyde Park. Of all the places Jack could have picked for us to meet, this one is certainly picturesque… if not ridiculously overcrowded. Reaching the main entrance, I can see nothing but tourists, wrapped up against the cold, hustling and bustling past me. Checking my phone, I can see Jack has messaged to say they’ll wait for me by the ticket booth but I’ve no clue where that is, and I find myself being swept along and in through the entrance by the crowd. It’s only when I feel a firm hand on my shoulder that I realise Jack has located me, and he steers me out of the tide of tourists.
‘You made it then,’ he declares, though there really isn’t any need for the conversation to be awkward.
‘Yep,’ I reply, equally uncomfortable.
I’ve known Jack for a little over three months, since he helped me in the hunt for missing seven-year-old Cassie Hilliard. Jack was the police liaison that was organised for me to review the historic casefile, and despite a bumpy start, something like friendship has started to blossom since. He’s a nice guy – handsome, funny at times, and I know we wouldn’t have successfully located Cassie without his help and support.
But this is the first time Jack and I have seen each other since we visited Turgood at HMP Stafford. I wince as I recall the moment Jack informed me that pictures of my sister had been discovered on the hard drive, and then Turgood’s sneer appears behind my eyes again.
‘He wanted to rile you,’ Jack said afterwards, ‘but you shouldn’t let him get the better of you.’
Easy for him to say!
All I have left are three facts: my sister went missing twenty years ago, she was still alive when the video was made four years later, and Turgood knows more than he’s sharing.
Jack shuffles from one foot to the next as a cold breeze blows between us. He promised he would do whatever he could to make Turgood talk and wouldn’t stop until he’d helped me find Anna, but he’s not been able to offer anything more than words of encouragement. Turgood’s major heart attack eight weeks ago hasn’t helped matters. He’s currently considered ‘too ill to be interviewed’, from what Jack has told me. Too convenient if you ask me. At least karma appears to be in play for that belligerent monster.
The reason for today’s meeting is because Jack has been begging me to come and meet his daughter Mila. She’ll turn seven on Christmas Eve, which is less than a week away now, and I think it’s why he’s chosen Winter Wonderland as the venue for our introduction.
As we make it through the crowd and to a small clearing just beyond the ticket booths, it’s only now that I see Mila is holding his hand. Dressed in a faux-fur coat, leggings and ankle boots, she looks much older than her six years, but when she turns to face me, she is one of the prettiest girls I think I’ve ever seen. Her long dark hair hangs straight and loose down her back and when she smiles, I can see she has inherited her father’s goofy grin.
‘This is Mila,’ Jack gestures. ‘Mila, this is Daddy’s friend Emma.’
Mila extends her small hand, and does a half-curtsey as we shake.
‘It’s lovely to meet you, Mila,’ I say, with my most welcoming smile.
‘Are you Daddy’s girlfriend?’ she asks, without a trace of malice.
‘Um, well… no,’ I reply, thrown by the directness of the question, and glancing at Jack for help.
His cheeks have taken on a beetroot hue too, as he quickly stammers, ‘No, we talked about this, Mila. Emma is just a friend. Remember?’
‘We’re just friends,’ I concur.
‘Emma is that famous writer I was telling you about,’ Jack adds. ‘Remember? You said you wanted to meet her because you want to be a writer one day too.’
‘Oh yeah, I’ve decided I don’t want to be a writer any more,’ she corrects. ‘Seems like too much hard work.’
‘And what do you want to do instead, when you’re older?’ I ask inquisitively.
‘I’m going to ride horses at the Olympics, and then I’m going to be an actress.’ She says it so matter-of-factly that you’d think it had been pre-ordained from upon high and etched into a stone tablet.
In fairness, I never thought I’d end up writing professionally. I was a major bookworm when I was younger, but in hindsight I think it was just easier getting lost in a book than having to deal with the fallout of Anna’s disappearance. Reading made me want to write stories of my own, where I could control the narrative and the course of the characters; some would say that means I’m a bit of a control freak, but I would counter that I’m just a sucker for a happy ending.
‘You can’t even ride a horse,’ Jack chimes in, still confused by Mila’s self-predicted future.
‘Not yet, but when Santa brings me a horse for Christmas, then I’ll have to learn to ride, won’t I?’
I don’t know where to look; the expression on Jack’s face makes me want to howl with laughter, as he stutters to explain that Santa is highly unlikely to bring Mila a horse for Christmas. He stops short of telling her the truth about the big guy dressed in red.
‘Besides,’ he concludes, ‘a horse won’t fit down your mum’s chimney, will it? Plus, her garden isn’t big enough to accommodate livestock.’ He turns to face me, keen to change the subject. ‘Shall we go in now?’
I nod, stifling the laugh. Once through the entrance, we find ourselves in a muddy thoroughfare, with market-like stalls on both sides, already encouraging visitors to part with their hard-earned money. There are stalls with bespoke tree decorations, handmade fudge, speciality cheeses, and carved wooden ornaments. I have to be honest, I’m already starting to feel more relaxed and festive, and I have to catch myself before I get swept up in the atmosphere.
I feel awful for leaving Maddie to handle Sergeant Daggard’s questions alone, though I was relieved to see her showing him her certificate of training as I was leaving. She definitely didn’t do anything wrong in my eyes, and if necessary I’ll phone Sergeant Daggard myself and tell him as much. Whipping out my phone, I fire a message of support to Maddie, offering to return after this catch-up with Jack. I’m due to stay at Rachel’s flat in Ealing tonight, but we haven’t agreed a specific time for me to be home and I’m sure she’d understand my not wanting to leave Maddie alone after what happened. Undoubtedly, the suicide has already made the news headlines across the capital; certainly there were photographers gathered at the entrance to the building when I left. Thankfully, a
small tent had been erected over where Natalie must have landed, so hopefully the front pages won’t be plastered with a gory shot.
‘Are you okay?’ Jack asks when we’ve made it through the stalls. ‘You seem distracted.’
I’m conscious that Mila can probably overhear anything we discuss and I don’t want to ruin her day. ‘I’ll tell you later. I’m sorry I was late arriving.’
‘You weren’t late, not really. Well, maybe by a few minutes, but I’d already taken into account the fact you’d probably get lost on the way from your agent’s office,’ he chuckles, to show he means no offence. ‘Listen, I promised Mila she could go skating on the ice, if you fancy it?’
I shake my head rapidly. ‘No, no, no, ice and I are not friends,’ I explain. ‘I never learned how to do it when I was a child, and then when Rachel and I were at university she said she’d teach me, so we went along to a rink one night, and despite her best efforts I ended up with a ligament strain in my knee and a behind that resembled a bruised banana. Don’t let me stop you two though. I don’t mind watching from the safety of the perimeter fence.’
‘Good heavens, no,’ Jack replies. ‘I can’t skate for toffee either, but Mila’s happy going on alone, aren’t you, sweetie?’
She nods, totally unfazed by the prospect, so that’s where we head, Jack paying for her to hire skates and then helping her strap them on. He joins me at the fence once she’s on the ice. I’ll admit to feeling pangs of jealousy at how effortlessly she can glide across the temporary rink. If she hopes for an Olympic medal one day, she’d be better off focusing her efforts on skating rather than equestrianism.
‘She’s a natural,’ I say, as Jack snaps some pictures of her on his phone.
‘I’d like to take the credit but her mum’s been taking her skating since she could first walk.’ He puts the phone away. ‘I’m glad we’ve got a moment to talk without her earwigging. I wanted to ask how you’re doing?’
‘Me? I’m fine.’
Jack turns so he’s looking straight at me, and I can see the concern etched around his eyes. ‘Are you sure? I know we’ve spoken a few times on the phone since, and shared emails, but I sense you’re still carrying the burden of what Turgood said when we went to see him, and—’
‘Turgood is lying,’ I say with certainty, ‘but short of beating the truth out of him, there isn’t a lot more either of us can do about that, is there?’
Jack doesn’t respond at first, but continues to stare into my eyes. ‘I’m sorry it wasn’t the news you were hoping for. Believe me, I’ve met my fair share of Turgoods, and monsters like him get off on thinking they know more than the rest of us. You have to remember that you beat him before. If it wasn’t for your extensive research and determination, he would never have been brought to justice for the abuse he oversaw at St Francis. You’re the reason the police opened an investigation into the home. You’re the reason he was tried and sentenced at The Old Bailey. And you’re the reason he will never be able to repeat those abuses.’
But I’m also the reason that Anna stomped off that day.
Jack brushes a stray hair from my face, and gently tucks it behind my ear. ‘Have you had any new leads emerge on the website you set up for Anna?’
After the success of Monsters and the media attention when Cassie Hilliard was found, there had been a spike in the number of messages I received through the site, but these were words of support rather than clues as to where she might be.
I wish someone could find a bittersweet ending for my story.
‘Nothing new,’ I say despondently.
‘Is that why you’re so distracted today?’
I shake my head. ‘When I was at Maddie’s office, a woman died by suicide after throwing herself from the roof.’
Jack is blinking at me, maybe trying to work out if I’m trying to prank him. ‘Seriously?’
I nod. ‘Check your phone; I’m sure it’s probably trending on Twitter. Her name was Natalie and she must have been about my age, give or take. One minute she was there, and the next…’
Tears bite at my eyes.
Jack puts his arm around my shoulders and pulls me into his fleece coat.
‘I’m so sorry. You should have said… We could have postponed today.’
‘It was a bit late,’ I say, relaxing into his grasp. ‘I’ll be okay. I was going to ask actually… the woman – Natalie – had something to do with the disappearance of a girl called Sally Curtis. I wondered if it was a case you’re familiar with?’
Jack shakes his head. ‘Not a name that rings any bells with me, I’m afraid. Certainly not a name that’s tied to any of the backlog of cases I’m currently reviewing. Do you have any more detail? Where she disappeared? When?’
‘No, just the name unfortunately. It’s definitely a name I’ve come across but I can’t quite figure out why. Never mind.’
Jack’s giving me a cock-eyed smile.
‘What?’ I ask.
‘That look in your eyes.’ He sniggers. ‘I’ve seen it before. When we first met in September you had that look then as well.’
I don’t know what look he’s referring to, but I won’t deny that Natalie’s final words have piqued my interest.
You need to find her. Find Sally. Tell her I’m sorry.
Chapter Ten
Then
Wareham, Dorset
The walk to school on Monday morning was a lot more painful than Natalie had anticipated. After the grilling from her mum and dad, she’d ended up leaving late and missing the early bus. She preferred catching the early bus as it was always quieter than the later one. By the time she reached the bus stop, the line was already ten-deep with students of varying ages. On any normal day, she would have had time to bypass the bus stop and walk to school before the morning bell sounded, but with every step such agony, her pace was much slower today.
When the bus had arrived, it had already been packed with teenagers wearing the same dark green blazer and tie as herself. There were no seats available, but at least the bus driver allowed her to squeeze on, perched perilously just behind the yellow line. Three stops later, and she was practically bundled from the bus as the throng of students pushed forwards to get in through the gates to see friends and copy homework before the bell.
Natalie had looked for, but failed to find, either Louise or Jane in their usual hangout at the far side of the playground near the enormous sports centre. When the bell had sounded, she’d hobbled as quickly as she could in through the main doors, up the stairs to the first floor, and along to class 9-E. No sign of Louise or Jane in their seats either, though the space at Sally’s desk was almost haunting. Natalie deliberately kept her eyes from looking over at the desk, as if Sally’s absence was news to her, as it would have been to most of her other classmates, who were shouting and cooing and gossiping about last night’s Hollyoaks.
Mrs Engleberry – their registration tutor – arrived two minutes later, and was just wishing everyone a good morning when a knock at the door was followed by Louise and Jane scuttling in and taking their seats on the far side of the class. With heads bowed, they quickly apologised for being late, but neither looked at Sally’s desk and both avoided eye contact with Natalie.
When the second bell sounded to announce assembly, Natalie did her best to cut through the flow of classmates to stand beside Louise and Jane, but both were too far ahead and showed no interest in waiting for her.
Louise is probably just feeling guilty about slapping my cheek last night, Natalie tried to reassure herself, though in truth it should have been her avoiding them after what had happened, and she wasn’t enjoying this cold-shoulder treatment.
What about the pact? They were supposed to be in this together, weren’t they? Didn’t that mean banding together and supporting one another through thick and thin?
Assembly was as irrelevant as ever but a real strain for Natalie to remain standing for the entire fifteen minutes of sermons, school hymn and notices. The fact that
the canteen was serving spaghetti carbonara was hardly newsworthy; besides, they’d all see the canteen menu when they went in for lunch anyway.
Natalie finally managed to collar the pair of them at mid-morning break, having twice missed them before and after double-science. She didn’t want them to know she suspected they’d been avoiding her all morning, but she couldn’t keep from checking that they’d both stuck to the plan so far.
‘Sally’s mum was on the phone to mine first thing,’ Natalie bowled out with right away.
Before she could check whether their mums had received similar calls, Louise grabbed Natalie’s arm hard, pinching the skin, and yanked her out of earshot of anyone else.
‘What the hell is wrong with you?’ Louise snapped.
Natalie rubbed her arm gingerly. ‘What? All I asked was—’
The spiked glare fired by Louise was enough to stop Natalie repeating her mistake. ‘Jane and I were thinking that it’s probably best if the three of us just lay low today. Yeah? Don’t want to draw unnecessary attention to ourselves. Sally’s mum is bound to have phoned the school to say that… she won’t be coming in today, but it’s probably too early for her to phone the police.’
Natalie’s eyes widened but she didn’t speak.
The police? Natalie hadn’t even thought through the full repercussions of what they’d done last night. Would the police really get involved? Natalie had been so concerned with just getting home without her parents discovering she’d snuck out that she hadn’t dared to fast forward to possible ramifications.
‘So we’ve just got to stick to our story, yeah? We’re all agreed? Last night didn’t happen. None of us snuck out, none of us went to the woods and we don’t know what happened to… her.’