“That makes sense.” CeCe nodded. “Oooh—I know what you should name her!” She squealed abruptly, hitting the back of the seat.
“What CeCe?” I said in surprise.
“It’s so good and I thought of it. You’re going to love this; I’m so smart.”
“I don’t think she’s naming her CeCe.” Richie said, looking at CeCe like she was a crazy person.
“No. I have the perfect name, even though mine’s pretty perfect—one good gift from my mother.”
“Cecilia Kathryn! Be good to your mother.” My mother said from the front seat, eyeballing her through the rearview mirror.
Okay, Okay. Are you ready?” She wiggled in her seat.
“Sometime before the baby’s born, preferably.” I said.
“Okay, are you sure you’re ready?”
“Yes!” The rest of us said in unity and exasperation.
“Geez, you don’t have to yell. I’m trying to help here.” She said, pretending to be offended. “Lucy.” She smiled, looking at me.
As soon as I started to reply, surprised by her offer, I felt something inside stop me. Almost like little tiny bubbles floating upward. I paused for a moment as the bubbles dispersed. I hadn’t remembered feeling anything like that other than the butterflies the night I met Skylar.
“So, Char—what do you think?”
“Why Lucy?” Richie asked dumbfounded.
“Shhh!” I said to everyone in the car.
“Is everything okay?” My mother asked, concerned.
“Lucy, the name she gave Skylar, as hers, the night she met him.” CeCe said smiling.
“Shhh!” I said as I suddenly felt a few more bubbles flowing through my belly.
“What is it Char?” My mother pressed.
“I don’t know. I’m feeling a strange bubble-like feeling in my stomach.” I said, putting my hand on my belly.
My mother smiled, “Someone heard her name.”
“Lucy, I don’t know why I didn’t think of that.” I said with both hands on my belly.
“I remember the first time I felt each of you move. It was wonderful until you got to be the size of a watermelon and then it just kind of made me have to pee. When they’re little like she is now, it feels like fizzing bubbles.
“Do you like Lucy?” I said rubbing my belly. As soon as I finished saying that I realized that this was the first time I had talked to her. I felt a few more bubbles gravitate upwards.
“See—I told you I had the perfect name. You’re welcome for my awesomeness.” CeCe said, happy with herself.
“Lucy is a pretty name.” My mother added.
“How about Lucy Richie?” My brother asked. “Now that’s a good name.”
“Oh my gravy—that is not a good name.” CeCe said, looking at Richie with a frown embracing her face.
“How about Lucy Grace?” My mother asked.
“Lucy Grace. Lucy Grace. Lucy Grace.” I said trying to get a good feel of it. “Lucy Grace. I like it.”
“It’s pretty.” CeCe said. “And you’re welcome?”
“I get some credit too.” My mother said, looking for an acknowledgement.
“Yes, thank you ladies. I think Lucy likes it too. I’ve been feeling bubbles almost the whole time you’ve been talking.”
“I want to feel.” CeCe said leaning over the front seat.
“I’m not sure you can feel them. I feel them inside but I can’t feel them with my hand.”
“It will probably still be awhile until you can feel them on the outside—give it another month and then we should be able to.” My mother said smiling as we pulled into CeCe’s parent’s house.
“So, I’ll see you before you leave on Saturday—right?” I asked CeCe.
“Absolutely! Besides I need some more home-cooked meals before I leave for school and we know that’s not going to happen at my house. My mother fired Mrs. Ikanza while I was away at school. She thought she was stealing her clothes while she was at work. I’ve been starving since I’ve been home except for the few times I snuck over to Mrs. Ikanza’s house.”
“Was she stealing her clothes?” Richie asked.
“No, I don’t think so. I think she just didn’t want Mrs. Ikanza over, with her twenty-one year old beautiful daughter. She’s going through a bit of a mid-life thing where she’s been really judgmental of herself and finding that little Brazilian beauty swimming in her pool, one day, in her thong swimsuit didn’t help her self-esteem.”
“Oh my!” My mother said. “That’s too bad. If you get hungry, you know you can always stop over.”
“Was your dad checking her out?” Richie laughed.
“Richie—you can hit him CeCe.” My mother said glaring at him.
“No, he might have though. She’s been so cranky, I don’t blame him. At least Mrs. Ikanza’s daughter is always smiling and happy. She’s actually really sweet, just like Mrs. Ikanza.” CeCe said matter of fact.
“Maybe I should come with you to Mrs. Ikanza’s house next time.” Richie said.
“Ouch!” Richie moved away from CeCe quickly.
“Nah, you don’t want to meet Mrs. Ikanza’s husband. He’s 6’2 and I’m sure he hits a lot harder than I do if any boys get too close to his little girl.” CeCe said smiling, in a satisfied way, as she stepped out of the car.
“Alright, I have to go before Harley’s unleashed. I love you Char. I love you too Lucy Grace.” CeCe said as she hugged me and reached down to rub my belly.
“Bye CeCe, we’ll see you soon. Tell your mother I said hello.” My mother smiled.
“Bye Mrs. Buchanan. Bye Richie.” CeCe said, waving as we pulled away.
A few minutes later we were home. It was almost dinner time and my mother had my father pick up a pizza for supper. Although my dad hadn’t said more than two words to me since Christmas Eve I hoped that he would be excited to see the ultrasound pictures. Maybe my mother would tell him about the appointment. She was a great buffer between us kids and him, especially when he got upset. She helps ease him out of his frustration and reminds him of what it is like to be young as she’s almost always lighthearted and fun to be around. Her personality is the perfect fit for a Kindergarten teacher. Her students all love her and she loves them. She says that the reason she enjoys teaching is the excitement she feels at the moment when the light bulb goes off in their curious developing minds. They figure out the joy of learning something new—like reading and writing and learning about new worlds. To my mother it’s like watching a jumbo 747 jet take off for the first time; incredible.
“Hi honey.” My mother said as she kissed my dad to greet him. “How was your day?”
“Good. We just started pruning the trees today. If the weather continues to cooperate, we should be able to get all the pruning done within the next two weeks.”
“Thank you for picking up the pizza. I wasn’t sure what time we’d be back and I didn’t want dinner to be too late.” She said as she got out paper plates.
I stepped into the hallway, just out of sight, to put my coat away.
“Did the appointment go okay?” I heard my dad say lowering his voice.
“It went really well. Her doctor, at least the one seems nice—very professional but nice.”
“Is everything okay with her and the baby?” He asked, with his voice still low.
I stayed quiet and leaned against the hallway wall. I wanted to hear everything they were talking about. My dad was actually asking about me. Why wouldn’t he just talk to me—ask me?
“Yes, everything looks good. In fact, she got to find out the sex of the baby!” My mother said with a bit of excitement in her voice.
“So, what is it?” He asked.
“Richard Roe Buchanan you are going to have to talk to your daughter sometime. If you want to find out the sex of your grandbaby—then you are going to have to ask her yourself.” She said in a firm but flirtatious way.
I smiled. My mother knew how to communicate well with stubborn so
uthern men, like my father, and always with charm and a smile.
“Oh come on Suez. I am going to talk to her as soon as I’m a little less likely to squish her.”
“We both know you won’t squish her. You have to talk to her sometime. She’s still hurting and worried about all of this. She needs her father now more than you know.”
“I just don’t know what she was thinking Suez. We didn’t teach her to run off and sleep with some boy she barely knew.”
“You know what? I was upset too when I found out. More than anything, I was disappointed and worried—worried that my daughter is going to have to raise a baby on her own with no man to protect her and stand by her side through all of this. She knows what she did was wrong. We are Christians Richard—how long are going to hold this against her? Right now she needs the two most trustworthy people she knows to help her through this the way God has helped us through some of our hardest times—she needs you and not your judgment.” My mother said as she walked out of the kitchen and into the hallway where I was standing, abruptly surprising me.
“How long have you been standing there?” My mother asked as I pretended to be walking down the hallway.
“For as long as you two have been talking.” I said, loud enough for my father to hear, as I walked out the front door to get some fresh air. “I’ll be back in a bit I just need a walk. I have to work later on tonight.”
My father’s words hurt me. I knew he was angry but for how long would he be angry at me? I didn’t just find someone and sleep with him. I had real feelings for him and I thought a future. I didn’t sleep with him to spite my parents. I was the one paying for my mistake as my mother at least acknowledged. If anything was my crime it’s that I’m too nice—too naïve. I think the best of everyone and it always comes back to bite me in the butt. It was so unfair. Life had tricked me right when I thought it couldn’t get any better. Now, I’m the one, with a baby on the way, home with my parents, working at a diner, and a college drop-out—me the Valedictorian of my high school voted most likely to be ‘most successful’ in my high school year book. I didn’t need my dad to show me how colossally I screwed up. It wasn’t Lucy’s fault. I would love her no matter what. I was still trying to wrap myself around all of this when my father knocked me two steps back just as I was finally starting to accept this fate.
I avoided my dad the rest of the day and went to work that night. I saw several of our friends, home for holiday break, from high school. I told them I was just helping out Trudy, because they were short-staffed, until I started back to school. This was a true statement. I was hoping to go back to school, at least community college for now. I didn’t feel the need to open up my Jerry Springer epic to anyone else. I had enough grief for the week with my father.
The next few days flew by and I was already saying goodbye to my best friend for the first time since third grade. I couldn’t believe we were going to be separated. We’d go for days but never for weeks, and God-forbid months, being away from each other. I thought about what she was going back to—the freedom to live, meet new people, and do whatever she wanted without thinking twice. CeCe somehow always had the best luck even when she made questionable decisions; it always turned out right for her. I was feeling a bit of jealousy all over again thinking about her leaving for college in Athens. I was frustrated with myself for being secretly upset with her. She was nothing but good to me. I couldn’t be mad at her because she wasn’t in my shoes and couldn’t understand what it was like to be where I was standing. I love CeCe and was happy for her. I didn’t want to be without her. I tried to be happy for her getting to do what we both had dreamed of since we plotted it out on the school bus years ago.
“I can’t believe you’re not coming back with me.” She said sadly, with her big puppy dog eyes looking at me and her head slanted to the side.
“I know; me too. I wish I could—I’d rather be there than here.”
“I’ll come back for spring break in March if not before. If your mom can’t make it to the childbirth classes before then, call me and I’ll drive back.”
“CeCe, you cannot make that drive for an hour class.” I said hoping she’d say of course she could. I knew she’d made some new friends with the Tri-Deltas. I needed assurance, without telling her so, that I wouldn’t be replaced by some perfect Barbie-figured fake blond with big boobs and hot pink lipstick with half a brain.
“But I would walk five hundred miles and I would walk five hundred more
just to be the man who walked a thousand miles to fall down at your door,” she started singing our favorite Proclaimers’ song as she grabbed my hands and danced silly.
“CeCe I love you. I’m going to miss you so much. We’ve never been separated for this long—I feel like a Siamese twin—being surgically removed from your hip.”
“Oh honey. No amount of miles will ever separate this crazy cool duo—I’ll be back before you know it. I’m going to miss you t-w-o too.” She said hugging me on the front steps of my parent’s porch.
“Hey CeCe, I packed you some orange mocha balls, some lemon shortbread cookies, and a loaf of zucchini bread to take with you for the trip.” My mother interrupted as she came out with her hands full of baked goods for CeCe.
“Awe thanks Mrs. B.”
“You drive safely CeCe and don’t stop too long at those truck stops.” My mother urged. “Call us when you get there.”
“I will.” She promised, hugging my mom tightly.
She gave me one more hug and hopped down the stairs and into her parent’s SUV. As she started to pull away, she stopped and rolled down the passenger side window. “Don’t forget me while I’m gone.”
“I promise as long as you promise not to replace me with some plastic-looking girl pretending to be human.” I smiled partially restricting my grin.
“We don’t play with Barbie’s anymore.” CeCe said sarcastically whipping out a full-fledged smile. “I love you Charlotte Renee Buchanan and Lucy Grace—the cutest baby ever.” She yelled out the window before taking off.
I blew her two quick kisses and smiled, feeling a bit sad to see her taillights heading for the road. I felt an arm gently wrap around my shoulder and then my mother’s hair tickle my cheek as she kissed the side of my head. I should have been happy for her but I couldn’t even imagine being without her for the next two months. My mother’s comfort came, as usual, at the perfect time.
“Richie’s almost done washing the dishes. Let’s say we make some cappuccino’s—decaf for you, and watch a good girly movie?”
“I saw Sleepless in Seattle is coming on at eight tonight and I picked up some Twizzler’s.” She said trying to lull me out of my moment of self-pity.
“Okay, sounds good. I’m a bit tired—I think my feet are swollen from being on em all day. Stretching out on the couch sounds good.” I said as we headed in together.
Chapter 12: Southern Women and their Tea
I awoke to tiny jabs in my side. It had been eight weeks since I watched CeCe’s headlights disappear out of the driveway. I missed being with her every day. We phoned each other at least twice a week to catch up on life and gossip. Home life hadn’t changed much though. My father was still giving me the silent treatment except when my mother gently forced him to talk with me at times—like at dinner when she pretended not to hear his requests to pass the dumplings and I was the next closet person to them. Lucy was starting to grow quickly and enormously. My little bump turned into a cantaloupe-sized lump. The tiny bubbles I felt, when she moved, turned into soccer-ball punts into my ribs and anywhere else she felt like visiting with her powerful little kickers.
My mother took me shopping and bought me several pairs of maternity overalls. I read in a magazine that you could keep wearing your regular jeans by using a rubber band and tying it through the button hole and fastening it all together by looping the rest of the rubber band around the button. I was so excited that I could actually wear most of my jeans by doing this instead of w
earing the huge, goofy-looking maternity jeans. Having comfortable and stylish clothes made working at the diner a lot more bearable when I saw people I knew. My belly was somewhat noticeable depending on what I wore. Some clothing was more concealing like my regular jeans paired with a big hoodie.
During this time, my mother and I went to the local college and I signed up for two classes. The classes would be over by the time Lucy was born and they were general requirements that I would’ve taken at the University of Georgia anyway. I felt a little better about myself taking some classes. Dropping out of college didn’t sit right with me. I didn’t want to be the stereotypical knocked up girl—looking to everyone else to pay her ride. I was determined to keep going to school and finish, even if it took twice as long. I, also, didn’t want to feel any more judged than I already felt by the stares at the diner and at church—even by CeCe’s mother, Beverly. I had caught her looking down at my belly, from across the aisle, during mass. Her face was scowling and she whispered something to James while shaking her head. I wasn’t surprised. She would have acted the same way with CeCe if it were her. I didn’t tell CeCe about it during our weekly phone calls or she would have called her mother and busted me out. I was just happy that my mother even though disappointed with some of my choices, was supportive and loved me especially during the times I doubted my self-worth and potential. I knew CeCe would’ve had it worse than I if she were pregnant.
I put my hand on my belly and waited for any movement. A minute passed by and she remained still. She must have kicked herself into a comfortable position and went back to sleep—now that I was wide awake and it was only six thirty in the morning and I didn’t have work or school. I figured this was what the next 10 years would hold; early morning rise’s with a busy baby, toddler and school-aged-up-at-the-crack-of-dawn kid. I needed to get use to not sleeping, I guessed, and invest heavily in coffee. I turned onto my side and propped a pillow under my belly and one behind my back to get comfortable again. The bed creaked as I heaved myself onto my side.
Southern Belles, a Novel About Love, Purpose & Second Chances (9781310340970) Page 14
