He raised his head as if it were almost too heavy for him to bear. Then I sat up to face him, stretching my arms, feeling as well as I ever had in my life. He stared, his mouth opened wordlessly, and joy lighted his eyes like sunrise over mountaintops. I hugged him.
“Kor, you rascal, you did it!”
“Did what?” demanded Tass.
“He brought me back from Mahela’s grasp! I was nearly dead—”
“Dan,” Kor interrupted, “I did nothing.” He had hold of me by one shoulder, as if I might somehow float away from him.
“You must have! Without knowing, as you held me. I was as good as gone—”
“Perhaps we only thought that.” He was smiling, but he looked abashed. “Perhaps we’re a pair of jackasses, Dan.”
“You certainly look it,” Tass snapped, and she turned away, stabbing kindling into the embers at the heart of our firepit.
“How could we say for a certainty that you were dying? Perhaps you were just about to take a turn for the better.”
“You know as well as I—”
“He was bright-eyed enough when I woke him,” Tass put in, busy with the fire.
I lost patience, lunged up and started ripping at my bindings. “What are you doing?” Kor exclaimed.
The bandages were stiff with old blood. “Get these filthy rags off me,” I raged. In my haste I could not manage the accursed knots tied behind my back. Kor got up and complied, to humor me. And as the swaddlings fell away, I turned to face him.
“Now,” I challenged him, “say you have done nothing.”
He gaped, turning so pale I thought he would faint. For my wound was gone as if it had never been.
“No,” he whispered, swaying where he stood. I went to him to steady him, but once by his side I could not help but embrace him again.
“No!” he declared more loudly, forestalling me. “I am not—who you say I am!”
“Why do you fight it so?” I asked him, astonished. To be Sakeema and bring life and healing to an ailing world—what could be more splendid?
He straightened and met my gaze, his strength somewhat regained. “Dan,” he stated, “I am overjoyed to see you well. But I tell you plainly, put that notion out of your head or I will knock it out.”
Behind me, Tassida laughed. I puffed my cheeks in exasperation.
“You’re tired,” I said to Kor. “Rest. I will bring in meat.” I threw a wadded blanket at him. But when I bent for my arrows and bow, a dizziness overtook me and I had to brace one hand against the ground to keep from falling on my head. It was Kor who laughed that time, warm and low.
“Healing or no healing, you have not eaten in too long a time, brother.”
“Sit down, both of you,” Tass ordered. “I have a few ends of old meat.”
Strips of bison dried for traveling, she meant. She brought water, then washed stones and put them in the fire for boiling with. She made a three-legged stand nearby, slung a deer gut from it to cook in, squirted water into the gut from a goatskin, and put in the meat.
I sat and watched her, trying to calm the pounding of my heart when her movements brought her near me. Tassida. She was not many men’s dream of womanly beauty, perhaps. Not dainty, she. Limbs long and strong, scarred from hardship and battle, a face somewhat like a comely youth’s, firmer yet more fine. Her clothing was a wanderer’s rough clothing, deerskin leggings, a patched tunic of brown wool. I had loved many women more soft and sweet.… Gazing at Tass, I could not think of their names.
The stones had heated. She moved them from the fire to the cooking water with loops made of green willow.
“Brother?” she inquired when she was done, as if Kor had just spoken.
We lifted our right hands to her, smiling, and showed her our matching marks—all my wounds had been healed except this one that I cherished. Then Kor showed her his sword—stone flashing red in the pommel—and we told her all that had happened since we had seen her last.
After a time she gave us warmed and softened meat to eat. “I am not hungry,” she said abruptly. Her manner was odd, but it did not matter to me. She had always been distant with us, her past a mystery, a fargazing look in her eyes.
I ate and stole glances at her, utterly content, joy of living filling me so that I knew Kor had to feel it as well—I sensed his smile even when I was not seeing it. Even when I was looking at Tassida, her handsome face, the way the light brown lovelocks of her hair stirred in the mountain breeze, the soft sheen of her doeskins. Or at the wide-spaced pines with trunks nearly as orange as flame, the lush grass of the parks between them, or at the horses roaming there, my ill-tempered dun mare, Kor’s yellow Sora, Tassida’s beautiful, grass-eating Calimir. Or at the sky, so close, so blue I could scarcely bear it in my happiness. These were the uplands my people loved to roam, and I could not have chosen a better place to awaken in. My belly was being filled. Who could want for more?
Red deer came out of the distance, appearing like visions to graze at Calimir’s side. And suddenly I felt the pang of an old longing, so old most folk knew it only as legend. There had once been eleven sorts of deer besides the red. Where had they all gone? We were few, we tribesmen, and the Demesne we hunted was vast. We had not eaten them all. Not even a tithe had we eaten.
The red deer sufficed to feed us, but the longing of the spirit went unfulfilled.
I felt Kor’s wry gaze on me, and shrugged, and reached for my arrows and bow. Leaving him and Tass by the fire, I went off to down us a deer for our supper.
Chapter Two
Truly, Kor was weary, after nursing me more nights and days than I have fingers on one hand. I had thought he would be talking with Tass when I returned with a yearling hart, but he lay soundly asleep. Tass and I skinned and butchered the young deer ourselves. It did not surprise me that she was expert. She had been on her own, hunting and warring and carrying on some nameless quest, for years, maybe her lifetime of years, for all I knew. She had told us little, Kor and I.
“You hunt with mercy,” she commented, severing the neck.
I nodded. The spine was broken cleanly by my arrowhead of chipped flint, so that the deer had died within an eyeblink. The Fanged Horse Folk, and even some of my own Red Hart Tribe, said that meat tasted sweeter when it had leaped in fright and pain, but I did not care. Venison downed by my bow might be cooked the longer, to my way of thinking, for the red deer were like tribesfolk to me, and I wanted never to make them suffer. I had practiced long to learn the skill of killing them instantly.
“If I cannot slay with the single bolt,” I said, “I do not shoot.”
“You should have so much mercy on Kor,” said Tass.
“What do you mean?” I demanded, though I knew well enough.
“Calling him Sakeema.”
I glowered at her. “Can you say it is not true?” I argued, lowering my voice so as not to awaken him.
“I hope it is true.” Dark fire in her voice, for no one knew more of the legendary past than Tass. She traveled plains and mountains and seacoast in search of it. With a jolt I realized that her longing was perhaps greater than my own.
“Why does he deny it?” I muttered.
“You know what they did to Sakeema, Dan.”
Ai, yes. Torments—and Kor had already withstood torments enough for any ten heroes. Shamed, I kept silence.
“Also, you know Kor, that he does not speak untruth or lack for courage. But you cannot know Sakeema for certain. So stop badgering Korridun. You are hurting him.”
I retorted the more sharply because she spoke truth. “You dare speak of hurting Kor?” I whispered furiously. “You, who spurned his proffered pledge?”
I should have known those waters were too deep for me. She looked me levelly in my eyes. All powers, but she was strange and beautiful, her dark-browed face as startling as a dream.
“I spurned him for your sake,” she said, “and if you should be fool enough to ask me the same, I would spurn you for his.”
; I stood up, reeling a little as if I had been struck, and took the offal away upon the deer hide to feed it to the fanged mares up on the slope. And there I stayed watching them, though their rendings made no very pleasant sight.
“Bring mushrooms for stew!” Tass shouted up the mountainside at me, and her shout woke Kor.
I gathered mushrooms and crowberries in a fold of birch bark. By the time I had enough I felt ready to face Tass again. She and Kor scarcely glanced at me when I came back to the fire, for they were quarreling. Or rather, Tass sounded vexed, and I sighed. Our Tassida had been the best of comrades when she was a boy: steady, courageous, ardent in a quiet way. But since we had found her to be a maiden, she seemed always to be on her mettle.
“I can’t get any sense out of her,” Kor appealed to me. “She says she just happened to find us here.”
“It is true!” Tass dumped mushrooms and berries into the stew, stirred it savagely. “Wind of chance pushed me this way. Whatever urgings govern me, I always obey them.”
Kor quirked his eyebrows at me, as if to say, See? But I was in no fit mood to dispute with her, and kept silence. She crouched with the stirring paddle in her hand, her lips slightly parted—they were of the shape of a noble bow, double bent. My mistake, to notice those lips. I felt a warm tide rising in me and battled it, ashamed, knowing Kor would feel both the warmth and the shame. No matter. He knew far worse of me.
“And you, Korridun King,” Tass added more quietly after a moment, “you will be bound homeward now?”
“No. I mean, yes, but only for a little while.” How his head lifted at the mention of his home along the western sea.
“Only for a little while? But where, then?”
“To go with Dannoc, to find his father.”
It took the best wits of both of us to explain to her that Tyonoc had been gone for years, only the shell of his body left, possessed by a devourer that made him, seemingly, into a monster. When, maddened beyond bearing at last, I had struck with my sword, the devourer had rippled out of the wound and flown away. Tyonoc’s body had crumpled like a husk, then disappeared.
“His self and his body are together again, somewhere,” I declared, “and I must find him!”
Tass put down the spoon she had been holding. “Dan,” she said with an odd gentleness that cut worse than wrath, “you are a blockhead.”
“So I have often been told,” I said stiffly.
“And justly so. If—”
Whatever she meant to say, I smothered it in noise. “You,” I cried, “who venture alone to the arid plains in search of—nothing, mere smoke puffs, imaginings, you call me blockhead? My father is real!”
I had come close to truth, for I saw her startle as the lash stung. “And you are besotted with him,” she retorted. “You have been besotted with him since I have known you.”
“It is called love,” Kor put in mildly. “Have you a father whose name you know, Tass?”
The soft-spoken question, with not even a tinge of wrath or self will in it, served to stop us both at full career. The look on Tassida’s face smote me. Then for the first time she answered us a question about herself.
“No,” she said briefly. “I am sorry, Dan. All that I meant to say is, how can you tell me he is—whole, somewhere? When the devourers try to take you, it is as if you are nothing. You no longer exist.”
So she knew that much. And the doubt she raised was one I had not wanted to face. I no longer felt like shouting at her.
“If it is so for my father,” I said heavily, “then we will find it out.”
Silence.
“There is my mother, also,” I said after a while.
“And my mother the king,” Kor said, his voice low, “and my father, who followed her.”
“And where do you expect to find them all?” Tassida asked.
“Westward,” said Kor, the single word.
The vast water that lay beyond his headland home. The sea from which the devourers came, to which they returned.
“The ocean?”
Kor nodded. “Mahela’s realm is reputed to lie beneath the waves.”
“Would you two think with your minds instead of your hind ends?” Tassida’s voice rose. “How do you propose to reach Mahela’s realm?”
“Getting there is no problem,” I quipped, trying to make a jest of death. Tass gave me a glance of such fury it silenced me. But Kor spoke quite serenely.
“I am a king of the Seal Kindred. If my mother’s blood runs strongly enough in me, I will be able to find my seal form.”
Be a seal, he meant, and swim to Mahela’s court, as his mother Kela had once done for his sake. Nor was Tassida very much staggered to hear it, for she had seen many marvels.
“Have you ever done so?” she demanded.
“No. I never wanted to, before.”
“Then how—”
“Fasting, vigil.” Kor shrugged. “That is as it comes.”
“And Dan? Do you propose to go out in a coracle and drown yourself?”
Kor winced, for such was very nearly the way in which his own father had died.
“That also is as it comes,” I said.
“Meaning, you have no plan,” said Tass acidly.
Kor smiled. “Are you thinking of coming with us, that we must answer so many questions?”
“That is as it comes,” she retorted, mocking us. “Once you are at Mahela’s court, supposing you should ever reach it, what then? She is the goddess. You will not be able to take from her anything she does not wish to give you.”
“We will see,” Kor said quietly.
Tass snorted like a horse. “You are a cockproud ass! If—”
Kor interrupted, though without heat. “I meant what I said just as I said it. We will see. If we gain nothing else, we will gain knowledge.”
“Much good it will do if it dies with you at the bottom of the ocean.”
“Be of better hope, Tass!” he protested.
“Dolt,” stated Tass, and she got up and strode off between the trunks of the great yellow pines until we could no longer see her. Kor sighed with exasperation.
“Do you want her to come with us?” he asked me, not turning to look at me.
I grimaced, for it was a vexed question. Being without her was perhaps less of a torment than being with her. “She plans to have neither of us,” I said.
“Truly?”
“Yes. It is perhaps a mercy. If anything could turn us against each other, it would be she.”
“I think nothing can. And I wonder what is her reason for refusing us.” Kor was still staring straight ahead. “Do you want her with us? In some ways she is wise. And she will never betray us.”
“Blast it.…” My thoughts floundered helplessly. I took joy in seeing Tass, in hearing her, in being near her. Not joy enough to ease my thwarted desire, but still … “How am I to say I do not want her with us,” I burst out, “when I long for her?”
“I have seen you looking at her. Well, we still make a matched pair of fools, then, Dan.” Kor smiled and stretched as if waking from sleep. “I will ask her when she comes back.”
He and I sat companionably, stirring the stew from time to time, heating the stones to cook it, dropping them in with the willow loops. Afternoon passed. Sometimes he dozed in the warm sunlight. Sometimes we talked. Evening drew near, and the sun sank, heart red, toward the snowpeaks. Silently we sat, side by side, and watched it.
Color flamed through the sky. By Kor’s side, the stone in the pommel of his sword blazed red, seeming to answer the sinking sun.
As if something had spoken to him, he picked up the sword and with both hands held it before him by the cross of the hilt, blade down so that the tip rested on earth. Like a young shaman taking vigil he sat holding it thus, his face uplifted to it and to the sunset light and to the blood-red light of the jewel. His dark eyes seemed to see far, forever, and his look was rapt.
“Zaneb,” he said.
The name of the sword.
And I knew it was not a name he had made for the weapon, but a name he had found. Sundown, it meant, and sun sank behind the eversnow as he said it. But as it vanished a glory went up, as if to crown the mountainpeaks, a splendor of the purest glowing amaranthine light, a half-circle flash of that unheard-of color, and then gone.… The blessing of Sakeema in the sunset, his greeting, gone. Long shadow of evening fell over us, and out of that sudden dusk strode Tassida.
And the heart-red jewel in the hilt of the sword in Kor’s hands gave forth light like a bubble of blood that burst skyward, as if yearning for the lost sun. And Tassida stopped in her tracks.
But Kor was not looking at her. Softly he laid his sword down on the ground. “Zaneb,” he hailed it, and lightly she rose and presented her hilt to his hand.
“How did you know her name?” I breathed.
“It came to me, as the sword came to me in the tarn.”
“You would have known Alar’s in like wise,” said Tass, “had you not been so afraid.” By the scorn that roughened her voice I knew that she was herself afraid. But some nameless sadness was on me so that I did not answer her. Zaneb. Sundown.… I sat gazing at Kor as he held the sword, I felt the touch of something beautiful, yet—fated.…
“Dan,” Kor said to me easily, quietly, as if I had spoken to him, “there’s a notion I want out of your head.”
“I cannot help what I see as truth,” I told him just as quietly, “but if it distresses you, I will say no more of it.” All powers be thanked, not even Kor could read thoughts. Or so I believed.
“Well enough,” he said.
We ate in silence, watching the snowpeaks turn dusky purple and disappear into nighttime sky. The stew was thick and fragrant. Kor and I used the last of the millet to make flatbread, which we toasted on the hot stones. We all ate ravenously. Only after every scrap was gone, except the chunks of cooked meat meant for the morrow, did Kor break silence.
“Ready to ride on the morrow?” he asked me.
“Yes.”
“Truly? You feel strong and well?”
“As well as I ever have. You?”
Mindbond Page 2
