by Ruby Loren
After delving around in the lost property box, I came up with a pair of jeans that would do and popped off to the loo to change. While I was changing I thought some more about that job opening and couldn’t help wondering if the board were deliberately delaying their decision to see if we could get by without an extra keeper. It wouldn’t surprise me if they saw it as an opportunity to cut the budget. It seemed to me that they were focussing on bringing in large, flashy, amusement park style attractions. It felt like the animals were being pushed into second place.
Clad in my poorly fitting ‘new’ jeans I walked back into the staffroom to pick up Olive but found my eye drawn to a bright, orange bit of paper that had been pinned to the noticeboard. An emergency meeting of the board of directors had been called and the meeting title was listed as ‘Resolving the activist problem’.
My forehead creased. It was clear that the board had had enough, but while I couldn’t blame them, I privately thought that coming up with ways to strike back was not the solution. While the notification didn’t exactly spell it out, I had a strong feeling it was what they had in mind.
As always, staff members were invited to attend and contribute to the meeting. I bit my lip, knowing that I would have to go. I at least had to try and curb anything that might get the zoo in even deeper trouble. I only hoped that the rest of the zoo staff would recognise the potential for problems by leaving decisions like this one to a group of people, who for the most part, didn’t actually work around the zoo.
I sighed and picked Olive up, intent on leaving the zoo via the main entrance. Perhaps I’d be spotted and shouted at by the protesters, but I refused to be cowed and alter my route. Especially when I was actually in the process of doing something for the good of an animal’s health.
My short blonde hair frizzed around my head as I shook it, dispelling such self-righteous notions. What ever happened to enjoying the day-to-day life of working with animals?
A slight smile tugged at my lips. “Nothing’s ever that simple, is it?” I said aloud and nearly bumped into Jenna, who was coming round the corner of the corridor.
“Hi. I was just getting coffee,” she said. I watched as her eyes darted around, looking anywhere but mine. There was a mobile phone in her hand. I inwardly sighed and wondered who she’d been texting this time. Tiff and I had assumed she must have run out of male staff members who worked at the zoo, having either achieved rendezvous with them, or badgered them enough to know she wouldn’t be getting anywhere.
“Having a good day?” I asked out of politeness.
Jenna shrugged. “Busy as usual. I hardly get a minute’s rest,” she said, and I tried to look suitably sympathetic.
Tiff had informed me that Jenna’s colleagues told her tales all the time about how little their supposed manager really did. Her idea of busy was apparently sneaking off on endless coffee breaks to chat to more guys.
I did my best to not take secondhand opinions on board, but the evidence was kind of stacked against her today.
“Hey, you saw the people who broke in, didn’t you?” Jenna suddenly brightened. She could smell gossip a mile away.
“Yes, I did,” I said, and then didn’t know what to add to that. Jenna leant forwards, her eyes managing to widen even further as she did so. “Well, they were wearing balaclavas and they broke in and I told the police I thought they might be trying to poison the animals’ food,” I continued and Jenna wound her neck back a little. Her folded arms hinted she wasn’t satisfied and I could tell she had a hundred and one questions on the tip of her tongue.
I made a show of looking down at my phone screen and pasted a suitably horrified expression on my face. “I said I’d get to the vet at eleven! I’d better run, or I won’t make it. See you soon, Jenna!” I said, perhaps a little too cheerily.
In an effort to turn the corner before Jenna could call me back, I sped up, only to jump when I nearly collided with the person coming the other way. It was apparently a day of bad timings all round. After blinking back the surprise I realised I recognised my near miss.
“Alison… hi!” I said. The new shop worker gave me a thin smile and hurried on past. I was about to walk around the corner for real this time when I thought to glance back at Jenna. Although her head was half turned away, I could read on her face that she wasn’t at all surprised to find Alison back here at a time when most people were working. If I didn’t know any better, I may even have thought she was expecting her.
Olive swung gently in the carrier case, as my footsteps continued down the corridor and back to the public area of the zoo. What business could Jenna and Alison have with each other? Jenna managed the reception, but Alison was a shop and odd job girl, so under the jurisdiction of Tiff. I raised an eyebrow as I briefly considered that perhaps Jenna really had gone through the entire male staff… so now she’d started on the women. I snorted and startled a couple of kids who were peering into the mouse house. While it would be amusing if the queen of gossip became the zoo’s next hot topic, I knew Jenna well enough to also know the thought would never cross her mind.
“Come on, Olive. Time to face the music,” I muttered as we cleared reception and made it into the car park. I glanced across to my left but to my surprise, only two protesters were there with their placards and they didn’t even glance my way. “I guess it’s our lucky day,” I murmured, before continuing onto the car.
Olive didn’t like travelling.
The loud yapping was replaced by the gut wrenching sound of yucking up, with five minutes of driving left to go. I winced and stole a glance down at the car seat, which I’d preemptively covered in a towel. I couldn’t see any signs of projectile vomit, but that didn’t mean I wouldn’t find it, or smell it later.
“You are going on a diet!” I growled when I tipped the ungrateful otter out of the travel box and back into the enclosure that lunchtime. I huffed as she ran off and immediately began chattering to her partner, Popeye.
If I’d been her zookeeper for longer, I knew I wouldn’t have made the same mistake. I’d have also figured out a way to stop her from hogging all of the food from poor Popeye, who was definitely dwarfed by his mate’s circumference. Of course, now it was down to me to devise some method of feeding them separately. The ghost of a smile lifted my lips. It might seem crazy, but I loved these little challenges.
The zoo seemed conspicuously empty when I walked back through the visitor route. I was hoping there’d be time to grab a sandwich from the fridge before the next round of chores ate away my day. After walking for a few moments more without seeing anyone at all, I started to think it was strange. Mondays were busy days, especially during the summer holidays. Where the heck was everyone?
I instinctively ducked when I heard an enraged screech.
A yellow and black missile shot over my head and landed on one of the sculptural dead trees the zoo had nailed on, to pretty up the outsides of enclosures.
Well that was one mystery solved. The absence of the general public was down to the squirrel monkeys having escaped their enclosure. Now they were out, they would proceed to run rampant, doing what damage they could to both property and people. Until someone unfortunate was assigned the task of catching them dragged them back.
I watched the small, furry face with those two dark, bright eyes that looked back at me from the ex-tree. Dextrous monkey hands kept the squirrel monkey in place and it made inquisitive noises that would lull anyone with less experience into a sense of false security. They might even think they were cute. I’d seen zookeepers with scars that proved otherwise.
“Well, good day to you, small monkey. I’ll be on my way now,” I said, keeping a wary eye on it as I walked past, hopefully heading out of the danger zone. The primate section of the zoo was further in, although there was always a chance that some of the little scamps had made it this far, even though their keeper should have been hot on their tail. I felt a stab of annoyance but reflected that at least this time they’d evacuated the zoo. Monke
ys sought out small children like homing missiles.
My mind was so firmly fixed on the tuna and sweetcorn sandwich I’d spotted earlier in the daily selection within the staff fridge that I nearly bumped into Tom when he appeared from a side gate. His sandy hair was tufted from pulling but his eyes immediately lit up when he saw me. My heart sank like a stone and I relegated all thoughts of lunch.
“Madi, you wouldn’t mind rounding up the monkeys for me, would you? I’d have sorted it already but I’ve got a meeting with the head of the board and I can’t miss that. Give it a shot, but they’ll probably go back home once they’re bored, you know,” he said, holding out a net.
I didn’t take it.
“Really? You just happen to have a meeting right after the monkeys escape.”
His expression morphed into a frown and his bottom lip jutted out. I was reminded of exactly why I’d refused him when he’d suddenly decided to ask me out the last time we’d spoken. Tom would play whatever character he chose in order to get what he wanted from you.
“What? Do you want me to get him to write a note?” he sneered and let go of the pole of the net, forcing me to catch it. He lifted his chin and looked down on me (something which he didn’t actually have to lift his chin to do) before spinning on his heel and making to walk back through the gate he’d appeared through, having found a victim.
“Hey, Tom, how did the monkeys escape?” I called after him and a fresh glower appeared on his face. He opened the gate and slammed it behind him without answering.
“I’m guessing they climbed out using the clematis. Who would have thought?” I looked back the way I'd come. The squirrel monkey started to chatter. He was probably already laughing.
I didn’t even bother to chase the monkey I’d already met, although he ran ahead of me all the same as I walked deeper into the zoo. My first port of call was to get rid of that clematis, or the squirrel monkeys would be one short shimmy away from another shot at freedom.
Abandoning the net on the bridge next to the enclosure, I rolled over the side of the bridge, glad that everyone was so studiously avoiding the monkey zone. I ended up hanging by my fingertips with my legs kicking the air in a futile attempt to reach the bank below. In the end, I had to let go and drop, trusting that the bank really was only a couple of inches beneath me. After a brief wobble, I realised everything was okay and I hadn’t yet fallen in the river. It was the first thing that had actually gone to plan today, I realised.
I tugged down the tendrils of plant, which the monkeys had clung to on their way out. My eyes scanned the enclosure but I was unsurprised to find it entirely deserted. You had to hand it to the monkeys, when given the chance for freedom, they seized it.
Getting out of the enclosure was harder than getting in and there were several times where I even toyed with the idea of hanging out there all day and claiming I got stuck. It was an almost watertight guarantee that I wouldn't see any squirrel monkeys. The only thing that held me back was the lack of loos and the knowledge that the responsibility for getting the monkeys back rested entirely on me. With the primate specialist at his incredibly convenient ‘meeting’. I was the keeper who looked after the odds and ends, which somehow made me next in line. “But I’ll be damned if I’m going to do it all alone!” I grumbled, sweating, and no doubt red faced, when I finally managed to roll back over the side of the bridge.
I left the net where it was and instead went to load up on tasty snacks to use as monkey bait. Better to bribe them than boss them. “Time to go see about some recruits,” I muttered, stalking deeper into the zoo in search of a posse.
The first part of my search yielded no results. On either side of the walkway, animals looked through the glass viewing windows and I could swear some of them seemed puzzled by the lack of faces looking back in at them.
More concerning was the glaring absence of the escapees. Had they finally managed to escape the confines of the zoo, or were they already creating mischief somewhere?
I almost jumped for joy when I found a person wearing the zoo uniform. She had her back to me and was looking into the otter enclosure. Brown, shoulder-length hair swung around her neck, and I could see her right elbow moving, as though she were writing something down.
“Hi!” I said brightly, making the girl jump. I didn't let my smile falter when I recognised Alison Rowley. Not even when she slipped the notebook into the back pocket of her jeans, so fast she must have hoped I’d missed it.
“Hi,” she said, turning her head and looking behind her, clearly keen to get away.
I gritted my teeth and kept up the smile. “You’re just the person I need. I know you’re great with animals and have some really good knowledge. You’ve probably heard that the squirrel monkeys have escaped and I really need a hand from someone smart to help me get them back where they belong.” I wondered if I was laying it on too thick. “And you’ve probably also noticed everyone else is hiding.” There, I thought, as a hint of a smile tweaked Alison’s narrow lips.
“I am at a loose end right now, seeing as the zoo is shut. What’s the plan?” She flipped her palms upwards and I tried not to seize her hands with gratitude.
“The plan is bribery and if that doesn’t work, more bribery,” I said, opening the messenger bag I’d filled up with fruits like cherries, strawberries and grapes. I’d actually had to raid the staffroom for some of the bits, but I figured it was the least people could do if they were all going to play hide and seek.
“So, not much of a plan then,” Alison observed and in spite of the evidence warning me not to, I found myself warming to her.
“Yep, we’re probably going to get our asses handed to us, but maybe by the end of the day we’ll have managed to herd them back home.” I hoped so anyway. Otherwise I’d be staying late… again. I wondered if Tom would come and lend a hand once his ‘meeting’ had finished. Somehow I suspected he’d be trotting off to the car park at the end of the day, as quickly as his treacherous legs would carry him.
“Just remember the golden rule… don’t be fooled by the cute and furry,” I started to say but Alison was already nodding.
“They bite, scratch, and maim. I know,” she said with such trepidation that made me think she’d had firsthand experience. Once more, I found myself wondering what someone with so much obvious animal expertise was doing working as a temp odd jobs girl, before I focused on the task at hand. Interrogating my only helper was not in my best interests right now.
“All right, let’s go catch some monkeys!” I said, sarcasm on point.
The monkeys remained elusive. With the exception of the lone one I’d spotted before I’d known there was trouble, the main pack had yet to appear. It wasn’t until we heard the familiar clamour of construction tools that I spotted one of the escapees, peering over the top of a half-finished boundary fence. Three other monkeys were dotted around the still to be completed capybara enclosure. One was doing something unspeakable to a previously decorative tree.
I wasn’t the only one to have spotted the freedom seekers. Rich had quit overseeing his colleagues and was reaching out a hand to the monkey on the fence. The other builders looked on with stupid grins fixed on their faces, as their boss made monkey noises towards the curious squirrel monkey. A couple of the others, Todd and Jack, were trying to get closer to a monkey perched on an excellent example of the zoo’s favourite sculptural dead trees. Jack had taken out his phone and Todd was inching closer and closer while they tried to snap a picture.
“Oh dear Lord,” I said, exasperated. Unwittingly, my gaze was drawn across to the left, where Lowell was about to haul away another wheelbarrow full of dirt. His dark eyes met mine and seemed to shine with a hidden amusement, as if he knew as well as I did what was coming next. Our shared moment seemed to go on forever, until he nodded once and turned away, leaving me with the strangest sensation in the pit of my stomach.
I almost missed the action.
The squirrel monkey Rich had been making noises at
saw something it liked. It jumped and landed neatly on Rich’s shoulder. He spread his palms and grinned to his mates. “I’m an animal magnet,” he said, just as the monkey seized a tuft of hair and pulled.
Rich screamed.
I couldn’t blame him, he didn’t have much hair left to lose and the mischievous monkey had just nabbed a fistful of what was left.
“Getoff!” Rich made to swipe the monkey off his shoulder, while his underlings fell about with laughter. The monkey sank its sharp little teeth into his hand. This time his scream was even higher.
“Ouch,” Alison commented. We exchanged nods of good luck and stepped into the fray.
In the end, Rich was the only person who lost blood. Jack and Todd’s photo taking session was interrupted as soon as Rich started to scream and flail. The other monkeys rushed to help their friend, but sweet treats and swift movement had persuaded them to avert their attack.
“I thought they were the cute fuzzy kind,” was all Rich had had to say when the monkeys were led from him. That was probably as much thanks as I was ever going to get.
Once the monkeys knew I had food, they flocked to sit on me and I had to waddle back to their enclosure, clad in furry psychos, who were likely to start scratching and biting as soon as the food ran out.
Alison opened the door to their sleeping compartment and the monkeys had been unceremoniously dumped back in. The loner had been lurking nearby the enclosure, and after the main offenders had been contained, it wasn’t hard to draw him in and put the happy family back together.
“Thanks so much for helping,” I said to Alison, once the door was firmly shut behind the monkeys.
“Don’t mention it. It beats stacking shelves,” she said with a weak smile.
“How come you’re doing that job? If you don’t mind my asking…” I tilted my head and looked up at her in what I hoped was a non-threatening manner. With our height difference, I probably didn’t have to worry.
