Sidney’s mum also liked Captain Kirk. She goes all giggly whenever he’s on TV. Come to think of it… she goes all goggle-eyed at the sight of the Tracy brothers when they’re jiggling about, saving the world from another disaster, much to Sidney’s embarrassment.
‘I mean, thank you, sir, I don’t know what to say,’ Sidney replied with a sudden grin that stretched across his whole face.
‘Indeed, thank you, sir,’ Sitwell added, beaming from his son and back to the squadron leader again.
‘Continue to study well, Sidney Spider. You have the makings of a fine astronaut and you should go far, in every sense of the word.’
‘Thanks to Dad and David Bowie.’
‘David who?’
* * *
‘I can’t wait to talk about it on my website,’ Sidney said, and grinned at his dad.
‘First we have to get it cleared at web headquarters with the head tarantulas,’ his dad explained in the car on the way back home. ‘We don’t have the authority to talk about the spaceship spider shuttle itself or give any details about the flight. The only thing we can mention is that you are officially a junior trainee astronaut and that you did go up in space.’
‘But only when we get the go-ahead from the tarantulas at the top,’ Sidney said. ‘No sweat, if it’s part of being an astronaut, then I can do it.’
‘Good lad. It’s only until Monday, Sidney. They work fast at the top, you know, and then we can tell your mum, the family, your school and your friends and the whole world.’
‘I can’t believe what happened to me today, Dad.’
‘Neither can I, son. You amazed us all and I’m proud of you.’
Sidney smiled to himself. He’d never forget today. Not in a million years. Not in a trillion years. Not in a zillion... well! You get the picture. He’d always remember this day.
‘Hey, Dad! I have a brilliant name for the spaceship spider shuttle. How about The Bowie?’
‘The what-ee?’
Chapter Eight
Thirty minutes later, Sitwell and Sid arrived home.
Sitwell pulled into the driveway and parked behind Sheila’s car. A soft light was burning and the house looked warm and inviting.
They jumped out of Sitwell’s Alfa, crawled up the path, and opened the door to find Sheila typing out an order for a batch of organic spider shampoo.
The stuff she ordered was made from lemon juice, green grass, and morning dew. And it was entirely cruelty-free. Which meant it wasn’t tested on humans. It makes sense. How many humans do you know who walk about covered from head to toe in spider bristles! Okay, your Uncle Harry might be known as Uncle Hairy - within the family - but it’s not the same thing.
I mean, really!
The television was playing softly in the background. Sidney glanced over and gasped. He shook his head as if to clear it. For a moment he could have sworn he was watching an old episode of Star Trek.
He blinked and looked again. No, it wasn’t an alien only that skinny human from a girl band making the news again.
Probably for buying a new pair of shoes or something. Humans! Really!
It wasn’t large. The television. Unlike people and their need for extra-wide, super duper large screens, spiders don’t share the same desire for big televisions or tiny mobile phones.
‘Hello, you two,’ Sheila said, as she typed in a set of figures.
‘Hi, Mum.’
‘Hello, dear.’
She paused and looked over at them with a smile. ‘Did you have a nice day on base?’
Sitwell glanced at Sidney as they each pulled out a chair and sat down at the kitchen table. ‘Yes, thanks, we had an interesting time,’ her husband replied. ‘How was your day?’
Sheila removed her reading glasses and put them down on the desk next to the computer. ‘It was busy, absolutely crazy, if you must know. I envy you two having an uncomplicated day out.’
Sitwell nodded and said nothing. Sidney sat staring straight ahead. He looked like he was still in shock.
‘Even if I asked, you wouldn’t be able to say, would you?’
Sheila knew there was something they weren’t telling her but she also knew not to pry. She appreciated her husband’s work was top secret. I mean, almost like James Bond! Well, not really, but you get the idea.
‘No, love,’ Sitwell said, and smiled. ‘We’ll fill you in as soon as we can though, don’t you worry.’
‘Ooh, Sidney,’ Sheila said as she jumped up and crawled over to where Sidney was sitting. ‘I ran into Mr Simon today and guess what! He loved your project and wants to send it to the ESSP for them to assess. He thought your work showed superior knowledge and maturity.’
‘Well done, Sidney! Mr Simon sounds like he knows what he’s talking about,’ his dad said.
‘That’s decent of him,’ said Sidney.
‘I thought you’d be pleased.’ Sheila smiled. ‘I’m happy for you, Sidney. Congratulations, love.’
‘Thanks, Mum.’
He couldn’t wait to tell her that after today he was officially employed by SASA as a trainee astronaut. He’d managed to bypass ESSP and go directly to the top people. He was on his way to becoming a real major and an astronaut.
Just like in David Bowie’s song!
‘You deserve it, you’ve worked hard,’ she said. ‘Now then, you must be hungry. How about something to eat?’ Sheila looked from Sidney to her husband.
‘To be honest I’m not that hungry,’ Sitwell replied. ‘Have you eaten?’
‘No, I was waiting for you two.’
‘Well then, how about I make one of my omelettes,’ he said. ‘With eight legs it’ll take only a couple of minutes,’ he added with a grin.
‘That’ll be nice, dear, and I think there’s some lemon moth soufflé in the fridge. How about it, Sidney?’
‘I’m not really hungry, Mum, not right now.’ He stood up from the table and crawled over to the fridge. ‘I’ll just have some juice and then I think I’ll go up to bed, if that’s all right.’
‘Of course it is, son,’ Sitwell replied.
‘Off you go then, Sidney. You do look a little worn out. Too much excitement, I expect.’
‘Yes, something like that,’ Sidney said, and grinned. He poured himself a glass of juice, put the jug back in the fridge, and said, ‘Night, Mum.’
‘Night, dear, pleasant dreams. I’ll look in on you in half an hour. Perhaps by then you’ll fancy a marmalade and dust mite sandwich.’
‘Thanks, Mum. Night, Dad.’
‘Night, son, sleep well,’ he answered, and smiled fondly at Sidney.
He was so proud of his son. What a day! Sitwell watched as Sidney climbed the stairs and then turned to face Sheila. He looked thoughtful as he leant closer to his wife.
‘Sheila?’
‘Hmm?’
‘What’s a “Bowie”?’
* * *
Sidney crawled into his bedroom, placed the juice on his desk, sat down on the edge of his bed and stared. He stared in front of him at nothing in particular. He simply stared then flopped back on to his duvet.
‘Ground control to Major Tom, I mean Sidney,’ he began to sing. ‘Ground control to Major Sidney... yippee!’ he cried out and punched the air with his legs - all eight of them!
Sidney was now on his way to becoming a qualified astronaut and he’d travelled in space. His dream had come true. Not how he’d imagined it, but then, does anything turn out the way we expect?
Not that it matters.
All that mattered was that Sidney’s dream had come true.
He’d flown in space and from today he was employed as a junior flight major and trainee astronaut at SASA. It didn’t get any better not as far as Sidney Spider was concerned. He felt like he was the luckiest spider in the whole world. The universe! The... well... you get the picture.
He was a happy spider!
Suddenly, a flashing light caught Sidney’s attention. For a moment he
thought he was seeing things. What? Not more lights, surely. Everywhere he looked he saw flashing lights.
He’d probably dream about flashing lights.
The soft burr of his mobile phone began to ring. Thank goodness for that! He wasn’t seeing things. Sidney crawled off his bed and grabbed the phone from his desk.
‘Hello?’
‘Sidney!’ It was Sacha. ‘You’ll never guess what happened! Sid, you should have been there, mate, you missed out on all the excitement!’
The End... or is it just the beginning?
I’ll tell you something else. This story is based on a true event. Absolutely! Would I lie to you? Of course I wouldn’t! Extend the truth a little perhaps all in the name of storytelling... let me explain.
Spiders do get to fly in space. It’s all to do with warm weather and thermals and I don’t mean those things you wear underneath your clothes during the winter months to prevent you from turning into a walking fish finger - I’m talking about weather thermals.
Spiders get caught up in them and whoosh… off they go!
Spiders don’t need a spaceship spider shuttle to fly in space.
That part is only fiction... or... is it?
The End
Sid in Space Page 5
