I shut the door, noticing the musty smell of the apartment from being closed up for so long. Wrinkling my nose, I walked over to the terrace doors and opened them. A warm breeze floated into the room, refreshing everything it touched.
I walked back to the kitchen. I’d had no appetite all day, but I was pretty sure there’d been a case of beer in the refrigerator when I’d left. After grabbing a bottle, I walked to the living room and flopped down onto the couch.
It had been a good day at work. It was nice being back home with my friends, but I couldn’t enjoy it the way I usually did because I was too busy being miserable over Zane. I’d been grateful when he hadn’t pulled away from me the night before. I’d wanted to provide him comfort and support, and it seemed like he appreciated it. He even looked like he might kiss me when I was about to leave, but then Isaac called his name and he’d pulled back.
I lost track of how many times I’d checked my phone throughout the day, hoping he might call or text. Each time, I was filled with disappointment when my phone remained silent. What was I going to do if Zane decided he was better off without me? What if he could never forgive me and eventually he ended up meeting and falling in love with someone else? I rubbed my hand over the pain in my chest.
I took a drink of beer and closed my eyes as my head dropped to the back of the couch. I felt like I was losing my mind and it had only been one day since I’d seen him. How would I get through days, months, a lifetime, if he decided to end things? A knock on the door pulled me from my miserable thoughts and I stood up with a sigh, setting my beer on the table and then making my way to the door.
My breath caught in my throat when I opened the door and saw Zane standing there. He was holding his bag in one hand and a bouquet of flowers in the other.
“Hi,” he said nervously.
“Hi,” I breathed.
“Can I come in?” he asked.
“Oh! Yes, of course,” I said, shaking off my surprise and stepping aside so he could enter.
Zane walked in and looked around at my place before turning to me with a small smile. “This is bigger than the cabins,” he joked.
“Yeah, but it doesn’t hold the memories that they do,” I said without thinking. I saw Zane wince and I wanted to kick myself for bringing it up. My memories of the cabins were filled with me falling in love with him, but his were probably tainted with the last day there, when I’d broken his heart and shattered his trust.
“They could’ve been better memories,” he said quietly.
“I know. I’m sorry I fu…” I started to apologize, but Zane cut me off.
“No, it’s my fault,” he said. My mouth dropped open and I was sure confusion was written all over my face. “It’s true. I was hurt when I found that file. I was confused, and I felt betrayed. You came to me though and you explained everything. You laid your heart out to me, and I was too stubborn to listen, I refused to accept that you really loved me.”
“I do love you, more than anything else in the world. More than I ever thought it was possible to love another person,” I insisted.
Zane nodded his head. “I know that now. I believe you and I trust you. You said you’d stay by my side no matter what and you did, despite the fact that I’d basically tossed your love aside.” He set his bag down on the floor and placed the flowers on top of it then he turned to me and put his hands on either side of my face.
“Our memories at the cabins could’ve been so much better and they would have been if I’d told you how I truly felt,” he said.
“And how do you feel?” I asked, a small smile forming on my lips. My hands were trembling as they moved up to rest on his hips. He smiled at me and his crystal blue eyes sparkled.
“I love you, Jeremy O’Brien. I love every single part of you and I can’t imagine not having you in my life. You make me so happy,” he whispered.
We both had tears in our eyes by the time he’d finished, and I breathed a sigh of relief as I leaned in and covered his mouth with mine. Our kiss started slow, but it seemed like a lifetime since we’d made love, and soon, our hands and tongues were exploring, both of us needing more. My hands cupped his ass and lifted him up in the air. His legs went around me, and I carried him to my room and laid him down on the bed, all without breaking our kiss.
Our movements were frantic, desperate, as we stripped each other of our clothes. Zane clung to me as I licked a path down his chest, swirling over taut nipples and dipping into his navel before finally licking over the head of his cock.
His hips jerked, and he cried out as I took him into my mouth and began to suck. I was like a starving man as I lapped at his cock, which was already dribbling at the tip. I’d been so afraid of never being with him again, never experiencing the bond between us, that it was impossible for me to get enough.
I wet a finger and slowly slid it inside him while I licked over his balls, sucking one and then the other and swirling them around in my mouth. I moaned around his cock as I worked another finger in, twisting my wrist.
Zane panted heavily, writhing on the bed and murmuring my name over and over again. I reached between my legs and gripped the base of my cock firmly in my hand to keep myself from spilling over. I moved back up his body, nibbling and sucking until I reached his lips. He clasped my head between his hands plunging his tongue inside my mouth, moaning as he tasted his own pleasure on my tongue.
I slid the drawer open next to the bed and fumbled blindly for a condom and a bottle of lube. I knelt between his legs and ripped the condom wrapper open with my teeth, quickly sliding it down my length. I clicked open the bottle of lube and then reached for Zane’s hand, pouring the lube into his open palm.
My eyes rolled to the back of my head as Zane’s sure hand rubbed my cock, slicking the condom and squeezing my shaft in his hot fist. He teased me then by slowly licking his lips at the same time his fingers rubbed over his hole, wetting it and preparing himself to take my cock. I growled deep in my chest as I watched his finger dip inside and he laughed as I quickly brushed his hand away and settled myself between his legs.
Zane spread his legs wide, pulling his knees up to his chest. “Is there something you want?” he purred as I lined the head of my dick up with his entrance.
“You. All I want is you,” I whispered.
I slid inside him in one smooth motion and he gasped, throwing his head back on the pillow. After a few moments, he began to move beneath me and my hips rocked forward. Our movements were smooth and sure, our bodies perfectly in tune with each other.
Our hands clasped together above his head and we stared into each other’s eyes. In that moment, the world outside my bedroom door ceased to exist. There was only him and me and the bond we shared and the love we were making. Words were whispered, promises made, and our hearts were healed as we became one.
Zane went rigid beneath me and he shouted my name as hot liquid spilled between us, coating our stomachs and slicking our movements. I followed close behind, filling the condom with my seed as Zane kissed me, effectively swallowing my scream.
My body was liquid, boneless, and I collapsed on top of him. He wrapped me in his arms, smoothing his hands down over my back and whispered loving words in my ear as my body continued to shake. When I gathered my strength, I lifted off of him and led him into the bathroom where we took turns washing each other under the hot spray of the shower.
When we were finished, I toweled him off. I dried his legs and then stood back up, wrapping the towel around his waist and using it to pull him close. He laughed, but he came to me, wrapping his arms around my neck with a smile. I bent my head, licking over his bottom lip and pulling it between my teeth. Zane sagged against me with a moan.
“Will you stay here with me, tonight?” I asked. I kept my eyes averted so he wouldn’t see how much his answer meant to me. I wanted him with me, always, but I would understand if he wanted to go back to Isaac’s.
“I kind of assumed I would be. That’s why I brought my bag wit
h me,” he admitted shyly. I looked at him then and smiled.
“Thank God. Ever since I got used to holding you in my arms, it turns out that I can’t sleep without you anymore,” I told him.
“Is that so?” Zane said with a pleased smile. I pinched his ass through the towel and he jumped away from me with a laugh. I smiled at hearing my favorite sound in the world.
We walked out of the bathroom and Zane sat on the bed to call Isaac and let him know that everything had worked out and he’d be spending the night. “He’s such a worrier,” Zane told me as he dialed his brother’s number. He shook his head, but I could see how happy it made him to have his brother back in his life, caring about him.
I pulled on a pair of sweats and padded out to the kitchen. I grabbed some menus out of the drawer and called in a delivery order of Chinese food. I was just ending the call when a pair of arms snaked around my waist. Zane pressed his lips between my shoulder blades and kissed my bare back. I slid my hands along his arms, holding him close to me.
“How was Isaac?” I asked him, turning around to face him. I leaned my hip against the counter and pulled him to stand between my legs.
“He’s over the moon that we’re together. My little brother is such a romantic,” Zane said with a chuckle.
“Well, you’re quite the romantic yourself, if I remember correctly from our first date,” I reminded him.
“Oh! Speaking of romantic gestures.” He laughed as I stuck my bottom lip out in a pout when he pulled out of my arms. I watched him curiously as he walked to the front door where he’d set his bag. He came back carrying the bouquet of flowers and my pout turned into a broad grin.
“These are for you,” he said, holding them out. “They worked so well for me the first time, I figured it was worth trying again.”
I took the flowers from his hand and wrapped my other hand around his waist, tugging him up against me. He grinned up at me and I felt my heart trip all over itself. He was a beautiful man inside and out and, somehow, I’d gotten lucky enough to have him want me.
“I love the romantic gestures, but I love you even more,” I told him.
Zane’s eyes softened as he stared up at me. “In the last two days, I’ve gotten everything I could ever have dreamed of. I love you so much, Jeremy.”
I kissed him until the doorbell rang and then I tossed him his bag and waited until he got to the bathroom before opening the door for our food. We decided to eat our dinner in bed, curled up against each other. We talked, sharing bites of food in between me telling him more about my friends at work and him telling me all about the center where his brother worked.
It was the perfect evening, but neither of us had slept well the night before. By the time we’d finished eating, we both were exhausted and decided to go to bed. I locked everything up and turned out the lights then slid into bed beside Zane.
I pulled him close to me and he curled into his usual position with one arm over top of me and his head on my chest. It was seamless, like we’d never been apart, and I drifted off to sleep with a smile on my face.
One year later
We said goodbye to Edith, smiling at the group of fishermen who passed us on their way inside the bait shop. The smell of food grilling and the sounds of children laughing as they chased each other with water guns floated along the breeze. It was the Fourth of July weekend, and while we had several cookouts to attend back home, we’d decided to carve one day out for just the two of us. So, we’d promised everyone we’d be back in time for their parties the next day and took off for one of our favorite places, Bradbury Lake.
We’d been back a few times over the last year, the first time to pack up all of my things and get my truck, and then after that, just to visit with Edith. We’d even brought Isaac, Hudson, and Matt with us a few times. They’d enjoyed the quiet the lake offered, and Isaac had been particularly fond of the deer.
Jeremy wrapped his arms around me, walking behind me as we slowly made our way around the lake. Every so often, he would lean in and place a soft kiss along my neck or behind my ear. It was dark already and the fireworks show would be starting soon.
“Do you ever regret leaving here?” Jeremy asked suddenly.
I stopped walking and turned so I could see him. “What would make you think that?”
Jeremy shrugged and looked out over the lake. “You haven’t had much peace in your life and I know that you love being near Isaac, but I guess I just wondered if you ever miss the peace you’d found here,” he said quietly. I touched his cheek and he turned back to me. I could see the concern in his eyes and it made me fall in love with him even more.
“You’re right. This lake brought me the first peace I’d ever known, but my heart is with you, wherever you are. You are my peace now and next to you is the only place I want to be,” I answered honestly. His smile was immediate, and I leaned up to kiss him before we continued on our way.
We walked around to where we’d parked the truck in Edith’s driveway. I pulled the tailgate down while Jeremy looked behind the front seats for a blanket. We’d talked about it over our dinner of barbeque chicken, potato salad, and macaroni and cheese and decided that we’d rather watch the fireworks from the bed of the truck. That way we could make out all we wanted to without any interruptions.
I sat down on the end of the tailgate and looked out over the water. Glow sticks floated along the surface and all around us, fireflies lit up the night sky. I couldn’t believe everything that had happened over the last year. Isaac and I were closer than ever. Rarely did a day go by that we didn’t stop at each other’s houses for a visit or talk on the phone. I’d met all of his friends, as well as all of Jeremy’s, and they’d all welcomed me with open arms.
Jeremy had officially asked me to move in with him the day after we made up. I said yes, of course, and then we’d gotten to work, christening every available flat surface. Jeremy made more than enough money with his job to support us, so he’d told me to take my time and figure out what I wanted to do.
I already knew what I wanted though, so I did some research, and a month later, I was enrolled in an EMT training program. I passed with flying colors, and soon began working as a certified EMT. I loved the work I did, and it brought me a new level of peace every time I was able to help someone.
Jeremy came back a moment later with a blanket. I helped him spread it out across the bed of the truck and then we both climbed on top of it, settling in next to each other along the back window. Jeremy took my hand in his, and we stared up at the stars.
“This has been the best year of my life,” he said softly. I smiled as I turned to look at him. He was staring back at me, a serious expression on his face. That’s when I noticed the ring he was holding between two fingers. I gasped as my eyes flew back to his face.
“I came to this lake a little over a year ago because I was told to search for a man. I knew I was looking for Zane Wilkinson, but I had no idea that my search would end with me finding my best friend and the love of my life all in one person. You are every single thing I’ve ever dreamed of, but never thought I’d find. You make me laugh more, try harder, and love stronger than I ever knew I was capable of.” Tears were swimming in my eyes and I brushed them away as he held the ring up, presenting it to me.
“Zane Wilkinson, will you do me the honor of spending your life with me? Will you marry me and be my husband?” he asked.
“Yes,” I answered, crying and laughing at the same time. “Yes, I’ll marry you.”
Jeremy slid the ring on my finger and then brought my hand to his lips, kissing the cool metal band and my skin. He pulled me into a tender kiss and then we lay beside each other, kissing as the fireworks flashed over our heads.
In that moment, I finally let go of the last bit of anger and pain from my childhood. My mother’s abandonment and my father’s abuse no longer held any power over me. Isaac and I had come out the winners. We had each other and we’d both found loves that would last a lifetime.
<
br /> I smiled as I gazed at the ring on my finger and snuggled into Jeremy’s side. He’d said such beautiful things to me, but it could all be said about him too. Jeremy had given me more than I could ever repay. He’d given me his love, my brother, and a new life that I couldn’t wait to live. He was everything I never thought I’d find. But, then again, I hadn’t found him; he’d found me.
The End
As always, my first thanks go to my family; my husband, my children, my siblings and my parents. You have stood by my side from the moment I said I wanted to write a book. You offered your support, your wisdom and your encouragement and none of this would have become a reality without you. I love you guys. You are my heart and soul.
Thank you to Deena for always standing by my side. No matter what I do, you are always there, supporting me and loving me and that is such a unique and priceless thing to find. Your friendship gives me the strength to try new things, while knowing that I will never be doing it alone. I love you.
Thank you to Jenn, my PD for being my best friend and my sister by heart. It’s hard to remember a time when you weren’t a part of my life. Our friendship is not about the big gestures or the times we get to see each other. It’s about reaching out to each other every day and ingraining ourselves into the other’s life. It’s about knowing every single thing about each other and loving each other regardless. Through all of our laughter, tears and conversations, you have become my person and I will ALWAYS choose you.
Thank you to my team: My editor, Allison Holzapfel, Jay Aheer of Simply Defined Art, Judy Zweifler of Judy’s Proofreading, Stacey Blake of Champagne Formats and my beta readers; Lee Rey, Melissa McIntyre, Jenn Gibson, Meredith King, Lori Greis, Wendy Lynn, Luna David, Anita Ford, Andy Rogers and Nemerald. You all have shown me more support, encouragement and enthusiasm than I could ever repay you for. Thank you all from the bottom of my heart.
Found_Hamilton's Heroes series Page 19
