As my bail hearing began, I tried to keep from expecting anything; the best or the worse. My time incarcerated taught me to expect nothing, so I stood next to Mr. Reed too numb to actually look forward to going home. I was prepared for anything; prepared to go home and prepared to live out the rest of my life as many things, but above all, a convicted murderer.
The only thing I felt was the constant cramping in my stomach. Thankfully, I was miscarrying. Yet, God was getting me back with cramps that felt very similar to the contractions that I felt while I was giving birth to Jordan.
I saw some of my family and Tricey’s friends in my peripheral as I walked in; Tricey, my mother, Lyric, and Blood. However, just in case I wasn’t let out on bail, I kept my head low and acted like I didn’t even see them. I hadn’t communicated with or seen them since I pled guilty to these charges almost a year ago. I needed to forget that they existed so that I could do my time without the pain of missing them.
I needed that to continue if today didn’t turn out as Mr. Reed planned.
“Good afternoon, Your Honor. Melissa White, State’s Attorney for the State of Illinois.”
Her voice made me want to vomit. She was the same State’s Attorney in my first case. Therefore, she reminded me of that time in my life and the horror and dread that I felt. Thankfully, this time around, I had some practice. Since I now knew the legal system more and had been locked up for some time, I was no longer afraid.
“For the defendant, William Reed. Good afternoon, Judge.”
The judge was an older Black man; clearly in his sixties, stout, and stern. He said, “Good afternoon,” as if to be so kind was the last thing that he wanted to do. He continued on as robotic as any machine; lifeless and without any care for my well-being or my side of the story. “All right. This matter is before us for a bail hearing for the defendant. I’ll hear from the State first. Then I’ll hear from Mr. Reed. Keep it as short and simple as possible, okay, Counsel? Let’s not take all day. Ms. White?”
The State’s Attorney went on and on about how I have been convicted of drug trafficking and murder. She explained to the judge how, even as I was being held without bond, I committed another murder. She told him that because of my charges and violent history, I should be held without bail.
Yet, when it was Mr. Reed’s turn to plead my case, he explained to the judge how my case was now being appealed because there was new evidence that the drugs weren’t mine. He told them that I was a naive nineteen-year-old that was simply giving my friend a ride to the laundromat; a friend that fled the scene when we were pulled over by detectives; a friend that did not inform me that the laundry bags that she put in my trunk were filled with bricks, not dirty clothes as I expected.
Mr. Reed also told them that I knew nothing of Tim’s murder. He told them that there was only proof that I did indeed know Benz and Scoop, but no proof that I had actually been a part of the robbery scheme that led to Tim’s death. He went on to tell them that since I was convicted of Tim’s death, his sister, GiGi, stalked and threatened me with death as I awaited trial in the County, so, therefore, when she attacked me for the second time, I defended myself insistently because I was driven by fear.
I cringed when the obvious facts were left out. I felt guiltier when he didn’t say how I had full knowledge of the robbery, but was too torn to stop it because I didn’t know whether to be loyal to my new boyfriend or my friends that introduced me to him for the sole purpose of setting him up.
“Your Honor, taking everything into account, I would respectfully submit that the State’s evidence is inherently weak and that bail be granted to the defendant. It is to that end that I invite you to grant Ms. Anderson bail today. Unless, I can assist you further, those are my presentations.”
Though the rest of the room seemed to hold their breath in anticipation, I stood there lifeless and stared into the floor; anticipating nothing.
The judge cleared his throat long and hard before speaking, adding further intolerable anticipation to those in attendance. “On the matter of bail, it’s obvious that this defendant has been involved in very serious crimes. To what extent will be decided during trial. Until then, the defendant will be reprimanded. Bail is denied.”
VICTORIA
I hurriedly cleaned my desk as the round of knocks on my office door began again. Then I glanced in the mirror to make sure that there wasn’t any powder on my nose.
On my hand was a bit of residue. I licked it, enjoyed the taste, and quickly came back to reality.
“Come in.”
Vince entered my office with confusion all over his face. “Why was your door closed?”
“I was paying some bills. Didn’t want to be bothered. What’s up?”
I honestly regretted what Vince was about to say. I was glad that I was beginning to feel so high that whatever he was about to say was going to go over my head anyway.
For the last week and a half, every time Vince opened his mouth, he was talking about that bitch of a baby mama or that other bitch, Jesse. Vince always had a habit of being my Mr. Fix It, so, of course, he was adamant about addressing the fact that Jesse was not my biological father.
“Have you decided if you’re going to find out who your father is?”
Instantly, I rolled my eyes into the back of my head.
See? Vince was determined to beat this dead horse until it came back to life. I have been able to avoid this convo. Since me and Vince don’t live together, it’s easy to avoid major discussions when necessary. But since we work together, he can easily corner me and then I’m unable to shake this nigga.
“Vince, there really isn’t anything that I can do. Who am I suppose to ask? My mother?”
Vince rolled his eyes at my sarcasm.
“I mean, we can go have a séance on her grave and ask her who she was messing around with, if that will make you happy.”
I didn’t mean to be an ass, but coke made me feel so giddy. When I was high, every week was like being on vacation, and every day was like a holiday.
I noticed Vince’s frustration and immediately apologized, “I’m sorry, baby. Lighten up.”
“Why do you think this is funny?”
“Why do you think this is so important?”
Vince look flabbergasted. “Knowing who your father is isn’t important to you? Finding the one family member that might be still living isn’t important to you?”
“I just don’t really care, Vince.”
“Why not?”
“I just don’t!”
With loads of frustration, I sighed and ran my fingers through my hair. Vince was fucking up my high, and I didn’t like it. He sat across from my desk looking so fed up with me. It was that same disappointed look that he always gave me. I often felt like I wasn’t good enough for Vince. I often felt like he didn’t like the woman that I was and was constantly trying to change me into what he thought was better.
Hell, one of the reasons that I got high was that when I was high, I was the content, blissful, and attentive woman that my reality didn’t allow me to be to him.
“Vince.” I called his name lovingly. “It’s only been a few days. Let the news marinate on my soul for awhile before you force me to take action. I’m not ready yet. Maybe one day I will be. Just not today.”
TRICEY
I was obviously disappointed. But, as Star stood to leave, just in case she blessed me with eye contact, I didn’t want to look like we had been defeated.
As we stood to leave, Blood took my mother’s hand to support her obviously weakened heart.
“I want my baby to come home,” she said, fighting back tears.
We filed out the courtroom and I began to think that telling my mother of the new trial might have been a mistake. I should have freed her of this burden of anticipation and disappointments and only made her aware of anything once Star was released; if she would really be released.
Lyric intertwined her arm with mine as we walked out of the courthouse
. Blood was in front of us, continuing to comfort my mother. I was jealous of my mother at that moment. Blood hadn’t been that responsive to me in, what felt like, forever.
“I can’t go through this again,” I said with a sigh.
“Well, you have to,” Lyric told me. “This is a great opportunity for Star to get out. We’re gonna experience some road blocks, but we have to stay positive.”
“She looked so … so different.”
Star appeared heavier than she use to be, and she looked hard, rough, and cold. There was no life in her eyes and her expression lacked any feeling.
“She didn’t even look at me,” I said sadly.
Lyric asked, “You still haven’t talked to her?”
“No,” I answered as tears filled my eyes.
“Even after the lawyer told her about the new case?”
Sadly, I shook my head.
As we approached Blood’s truck, I leaned against the back of it for support and tried to get some air. Blood assisted my mother into the car and Lyric stayed behind with me.
“Fuck my life,” I said with a frustrated growl.
Lyric rubbed my knee soothingly. In a whisper, she asked, “Is Blood still acting funny towards you?”
I laughed sarcastically, “It’s that obvious, huh?”
My life was a mess.
Vic was parked in front of my house when Blood, Lyric, and I pulled up. She was actually standing outside of her car with the windows down. I could hear the Gucci Mane that was coming from her speakers that she danced to as she text messaged someone.
Of course, Lyric’s facial expression read her irritation with Vic being there.
I didn’t have time for that decade old catfight. That too was frustrating me, Lyric’s obvious dislike for Vic; so obvious that Vic didn’t even feel comfortable attending Star’s bail hearing because she knew that Lyric would be there.
“I need a drink,” I replied with a sigh as I hopped out of the car.
Now that we had dropped my mother off, I was ready to drink my frustrations away.
With no words, Blood got out of the car and headed for the front door.
Though he had no problem ignoring me, he went over and beyond to speak to Vic. “What up, Vic?” He even hugged her and kissed her on the cheek.
Still dancing, Vic told him, “What it do, beau!”
She was overly jittery and bouncy. Even Blood and I gave her the same curious expression that Lyric had been giving her.
Blood simply laughed and walked away.
Standing next to me outside of the truck, Lyric continued to stare at Vic so obviously that I had to slap her shoulder.
“Stop it,” I told her.
“Why is she so damn jumpy?”
I laughed and shook my head. “You’re so mean.”
“You see that shit. Is she high?”
“Stop being a bitch.”
Vic smiled at me like Lyric wasn’t even standing there. She bounced towards me, still dancing to the beat.
“I’m out of here,” Lyric quickly told me. “Call me later.”
I simply rolled my eyes at her.
She and Vic missed one another by seconds; Lyric walking away just as Vic approached me.
Surprisingly, she put her arms around me. “How are you? What happened? Did Star get bail?”
Reluctantly, I told Vic what happened. Immediately, she suggested that we go find somewhere to relax. Being in the house with Blood and his attitude was only going to make me feel worse, so I agreed and got in her car.
I didn’t even bother telling Blood that I was leaving.
As we rounded the corner, I suggested to Vic that we go to a neighborhood lounge.
“Good,” she said. “I need a drink too. Vince is getting on my damn nerves.”
“Why?”
As if she was saying any ordinary thing, Vic replied, “He keeps insisting that I find out who my real father is.”
“Excuse me?!” I was confused and didn’t hide it.
She laughed, very unexpectedly and loudly. Like Lyric, I questioned her jumpy and jittery mood.
“Oh, I haven’t told you! Jesse isn’t my father.”
I was speechless and it showed.
Again, she laughed loudly. “That’s how I looked when I found out!”
“What the fuck happened?!”
I hadn’t seen or heard from Vic in a couple of days. My personal ordeals kept me from checking in on her. Yet, it looked and sounded like shit had definitely hit the fan in her life as well.
As Vic drove at a very rapid speed through the city, I listened in sheer shock and awe at the details of how she found out that Jesse wasn’t her father. “Well, a little over a week ago, Jahleel got stabbed outside of the school. He’s been in the midst of some beef that, come to find out, had something to do with him getting fronted some drugs and not having the money when he was suppose to.”
Confusion buried itself inside of my brain. I didn’t understand why or how a preacher’s kid was wrapped up in drugs. But, we were talking about Jesse, so I let Vic continue. “So me and Lynn rush to the hospital. I was asked to give blood since I was the only blood relative present, so I thought. After Jesse and his wife make it, the doctor comes back into the room asking for additional blood donations because my blood wasn’t a match. I assumed it was because Jesse wasn’t really Jahleel’s father. But then Jesse offered to donate his blood, and now I am clearly confused…”
“Right.”
“Then Jesse just looked at me and said that he wasn’t my father.”
I damn near fell out of the car.
Vic actually laughed at my response, like this wasn’t bothering her at all. “Actually, he said…,” then she very overdramatically mocked Jesse, “Vic, I’m sorry, but I’m not your father,” and fell out laughing.
In a very serious and caring tone, I told her, “Vic, this isn’t funny.”
“Girl, yes it is,” she said waving me off as she sped through a yellow light.
“Slow down.”
“Fuck Jesse. Fuck Jahleel. Fuck all of them!” She cursed them with a smile as she continued to go fifty miles an hour down city streets. “This is a celebration! At least now I know that the motherfucker that beat the shit out of me and tried to get some wasn’t my biological father. At least it was somebody not blood related to me doing that shit. I can sleep a little better at night knowing that.”
It was obvious that this news was affecting me way more than it was affecting Vic. Vic’s mother died when she was in seventh grade. The only blood relative that she knew was Jesse, and he was the root to all evil in her life.
I was proud of her for being strong, but, since I have known this woman all of my life, I knew it was all a front.
“Anyway, girl! Enough about me.” Vic smiled at me with eyes that were wide and bouncy, and I could have sworn that I saw her shaking. “Did you get a chance to talk to Star?”
My head began to hurt as my curiosity rose to stress.
This was all too much for me. I just wanted to dive into a pool of 1800 so that it will all go away.
Six
Thursday, June 9, 2011
VICTORIA
I giggled flirtatiously at Derrick’s efforts as he pulled my ponytail.
He held on to my hair with both hands as he consistently penetrated my pussy with aggressive and mean strokes that hurt so damn good.
In order to take the pain while enjoying the pleasure, I hissed in response and growled daintily.
“Take this dick.” He encouraged me, making the hairs on the back of my neck dance.
He didn’t have to coax my pussy into doing anything though. When I was high, sex was amazingly wonderful. I was a sex superhero when in La-La Land. I could cum over and over again, and every damn time felt like pure euphoria.
I was a freak of the industry when I was off that “white girl”.
Suddenly, I had a taste for Derrick. I hopped off of his magic stick and spun around so that I w
as face to face with every inch of him.
I fell towards his manhood instantly, as if I was drawn to it; as if being on all fours in front of it wasn’t close enough.
I wrapped my lips around it, and his slight groan moved me.
Suddenly, Derrick’s hands were in the way of my feast. White powder began to fall in front of my eyes like falling snow. He was holding his dick and making a line on it from the baggie that once laid on the coffee stand next to his bed. I smiled eagerly at his efforts, and, once formed, took the line off his dick and continued my feast.
The pre-cum that oozed from his tip provoked my taste buds.
He put his hand on my head, tangled his fingers amongst my hair, and pulled it slightly, encouraging me.
As I put his dick in and out of my mouth, Derrick’s moans sung to me a song of admiration and deference. He liked the way my jaws wrapped around him like the wet tight insides of my walls. As I continued to suck and jag his dick with tight cuffed hands, he was short of breath. I allowed my spit to spill over his shaft like a waterfall.
Moving my hair out of my face and holding it back, Derrick’s eyes begged for more and I gave him more. I moaned, sucked, and allowed my gagging noises to sing to him as his dick repeatedly hit the back of my throat. The choking promoted more saliva, driving Derrick crazy. My mouth, spit, and tightly cuffed hands fucked him as if it were a tight wet pussy.
“Arrrgh! Your mouth feels so fuckin’ good.” He hissed and moaned my honors, successfully encouraging me to continue fucking him with my face.
Just as his dick began to throb impulsively between my cheeks, he grabbed my face and brought it to his. With his arms around my waist, he laid me down while passionately kissing my lips. As our tongues made love, I massaged his balls, still wet with my mouth’s juice.
He whimpered with weakness.
My pussy was calling out loud for attention. Yet, instead of words, she cried slick tears of moisture; so much so that it began to run down my leg. We continued to kiss as I took his hand, gliding it along my southern pair of lips; showing him how ready I was for this.
In response, he took his hand away from mine, and licked his fingers seductively; sucking them free of me.
Good Girls Ain't No Fun Boxed Set (The SIX romance and urban fiction volumes of the LOVE, SEX, LIES series) Page 73
