"Where did you get that scar from?" She said flatly.
Instinctively, my hand went up to cover where I was bitten. I could barely feel any flaws in my skin with my fingertips, but the pain of that day and night flared to life. I stammered, not able to find the words to answer.
"Charles, shut the door." Stephanie said in her same flat voice and Charles sprang up at her command. I fidgeted under the weight of their eyes with no idea what I could say. Visions of Jerald and Sundown burning strangled me. I couldn't tell her.
Then the door was shut and Charles was bouncing back to the bed. He was excited, sensing our mood but not able to follow exactly what was going on. Stephanie dropped the sodden rag back in the bucket, and then took a few steps toward me.
"I know what bite marks look like. I've seen them. Who bit you?" Her voice was quiet and low. Her face was pale.
I didn't want to lie, I couldn't even force myself to lie, but my lack of an answer was indication enough. I shrugged and stammered, and Stephanie still came forward.
"I've heard rumors before I got here, and Connie talks. She's crazy. No one ever pays much attention to what she rambles on about, but I listen." She stopped when she was only a few feet away from me. "The disease doesn't always infect everyone, does it?"
"You can't tell anybody, okay?" I pleaded, knowing it was already too late. I didn't want the others to know. I didn't want to end up being crucified in the parking lot.
Her eyebrow raised and her head tilted to the side, as if she was seeing me differently now. "So a madman did bite you?"
I nodded. "I was bitten and survived. Ali too. We're both immune."
"How?" was all she said as she sat down in the chair I had fled. Charles seemed to be taking it all in stride, but I was certain he didn't fully understand our conversation. "My mother was bitten and there was nothing we could do. She just got sicker and sicker until..."
"I got sick too." I filled in for her silence. It lingered on afterwards until I added. "I didn't know people could be immune until then."
"They heal fast, so you heal fast too?" She asked, standing back up to come inspect my wounds again. Charles walked by her side, wanting to see.
"Yeah, we think so." I swallowed before pleading with Stephanie again. "Please don't tell anyone. I think that's the only reason Reed didn't have us killed. He knows."
"How?" She said, looking into my eyes.
"He's immune too."
Her voice was strained and she seemed a bit breathless when she whispered again, "How?"
"Our eyes." I said simply, and saw her focus change as she took in the color of my irises. "Mine turned green. Ali's were always green, they just got darker. They're the same color as Reed's."
"What color were your eyes before?" She asked me.
"Blue." I answered. I wished I could tell what she was thinking. She was chewing on her plump bottom lip, lost in thought with her eyebrows drawn together. Several seconds passed until she inhaled deeply, pulling herself back to the present.
"Sit." She said, pointing to the chair, and I complied. None of us spoke while she picked up the rag again and went back to caring for my shoulder. I felt the cool scissors against my skin as she clipped the stitches. They itched as she pulled them free. Charles stood close by, interested in it all.
"I'll bandage you back up, just make sure you wince every now and then, okay?" She said as she was drying me off. "But it looks like you'll be completely fine soon... if what you say is true. I'd like to take a look at it again later."
"Okay," I nodded in agreement.
Stephanie didn't ask any more questions. She just finished up with the mock bandages and cleaned up the room.
"I should get back to the kids." She said when she was done. "I won't tell anyone. Neither will Charles."
I looked at Charles and he was nodding in agreement, but I wasn't sure if he was really aware of what had just happened. I liked them both, but I wasn't ready to trust them with my secret. Even Stephanie couldn't understand how dangerous it could be. I didn't either until I'd seen what happened in Sundown. Now I had no choice but to trust them.
Stephanie left shortly after with Charles right behind her. I stood by the window for a while, enjoying the breeze when it found its way in to me. It was a small relief in the stuffy room, but I had a whole new slew of problems to worry about. Reed had a reason to keep his immunity a secret also. Was he scared of what his men would do if they found out? Would he be crucified too?
I worried the rest of the day away.
I pulled a chair up to the window and sat there while the hours passed. I thought of Ali and how we were ambushed in the middle of the night. I had been frozen with fear, unable to help her, waiting on her to come save me. Maybe if I knew how to fight, I would have been able to help get us out of this. It was embarrassing how easily I was caught, and then I had to watch Ali get beaten. I sighed deeply, once again feeling myself hope against all hope that she was okay.
When dark settled in, I was able to relax enough to fall asleep and was grateful when the morning sun woke me from more nightmares.
Stephanie sat with me again at breakfast. She told me stories about everyone that shared the floor with us, but I knew I'd never be able to remember them all. After sitting with her, I did feel better about her keeping my secret.
I found Anna about midday and asked again if there was anything I could help with and, again, I was turned away due to my injury that wasn't actually an injury anymore. Heaving a sigh, I asked for a book instead. She seemed quite pleased with that and took some time finding one for me. Eventually she came back with a copy of Moby Dick. I smiled, thanked her, and returned to my room somewhat disappointed. I was hoping for the kind of book Ali had been reading to me, but was still thankful I had something to help keep my mind occupied.
It was early afternoon when I realized I wasn't going to get the peace and quiet I was hoping for. Dread sprung up in the pit of my stomach when I heard a commotion in the hallway. I had left my door open in case anyone wanted to come see me, but these weren't the visitors I had been hoping for.
A few of the children had started to cry from the lobby area as two of Reed's men came stomping through the floor. Anna's hushed voice made it to my ears as she was herding them into the rooms.
The men were coming for me. I dropped the book on my desk and stood, putting on my brave face. I waited.
The first one in was Tristan. I was almost relieved until I saw the tense expression on his face. His teeth were clinched together so tightly, I could see his jaw ticking. The man that followed him in was rough looking. He was quite stocky and much shorter than Tristan. The twisted sneer he had fixed on his face instantly made me think he was one of the bad ones. My brave face faltered.
Tristan was meek behind him, but he met my eyes. I couldn't read anything in his blank expression. I knew he would probably kill me if he was ordered to, just to protect his family. I wouldn't blame him.
"Time for show and tell, boy." The stocky man grumbled and tossed a bundle of rope to Tristan. "Tie him up good. I think I'm gonna have to pretty him up before we head downstairs."
The lump of dread in my stomach grew until I felt like I was going to puke, but I didn't fight Tristan as he followed the orders. I'd like to think he was somewhat lenient with the rope tying too, since he didn't bind my hands as tightly together as he could have. That could have just been my imagination though. I was afraid to find out what the fat man meant by prettying me up.
I didn't have to wait long. As soon as Tristan had me secured, the stocky man pulled his hand into a fist and landed a solid punch to the side of my cheek. My head spun. I would have fallen over if Tristan hadn't caught me and held me upright. I barely had time to register the taste of blood in my mouth when another fist connected with my face again, plowing into my eye.
I rocked backwards, Tristan catching me again. My vision was going fuzzy and I couldn't focus.
The third punch hit me on the right side of
the face. This time, Tristan couldn't catch me as I fell into a dark, dreamless pit.
CHAPTER 6 – ALI
At some point, exhaustion overtook me and I fell into abysmal nightmares. Horrible, unthinkable visions assailed me and trapped me in a state of unrest that I couldn't pull free of. It was the sense of light coming into my room that woke me, but it was a struggle to find the will to move.
I looked up to my bed, no longer seeing Russell's hand outstretched and hanging over the side. Slowly, I peeked over the edge to see that it was empty. Sitting up straighter, I looked beyond my bed to see the monster I had created.
Russell was standing in the middle of the room, facing the light seeping in through the windows. A single stray beam was glowing across his face and I could see his eyes were unseeing and bloodshot. The irises a deep, dark red. I had created a freak.
Seeing him now, it was odd that I didn't feel any surprise. I had accepted the truth of it last night and knew I would find him like this. The tears and remorse had played themselves out already, and I just didn't have anything left. I was numb.
Hawk could be back anytime to check on me. As soon as that door opened, Russell was going to go into attack mode. I had to come up with a plan.
I could kill him and hide him in the bathroom, but eventually the smell of rot would draw attention. There would be no way to explain how Russell became a freak and how I'd managed to stow him away. I dismissed the idea of killing him. That left me with only one option.
I stood, catching his attention immediately, but he didn't advance. Knowing his personality, it wouldn't surprise me if he was one of the freaks that would bite if touched. I picked up the flashlight and flicked it on, aiming the beam of light right into his eyes. He squinted away from it and it gave me enough room to slip by him. He followed my movement, so I backed down the hallway to the door with him shuffling along behind me.
The bathroom was small, so I wasn't sure how I was going to maneuver around him. The last thing I wanted to do was touch him. As I backed into the bathroom with him coming around the corner, an idea popped into my head. He was following the light more than me, so I simply pointed it down on the floor and led him to the corner. His single-minded focus stayed on the beam of light, and I easily slipped around him. It was so ridiculously easy, I nearly laughed out loud.
Stowing my new flashlight away, I stood nervously in the center of my room. My mind was exhausted from the nearly sleepless night, but I needed to await my daily visitor. I wasn't able to get over the fact that I had a freak locked in the bathroom. A freak I'd created.
I was going to go mad.
As soon as I started to pace, I caught sight of a mug on the desk and remembered that Hawk had dropped something off during his last visit. Next to the mug of cold, congealed broth lay three pills. I swallowed all three of them dry, nearly choking on the big antibiotic, and ignored the disgusting cup of goo. I was hoping the pain killers would help my mobility.
Then I began my pacing again, waiting for my first visitor. It was Mona.
I shrank to the side when her candlelight entered the room, and I clutched my hands behind me to hide my shaking hands. She carried my food tray and dropped it on the desk, casting a weary glance my way. I was too afraid to speak, afraid for her to speak in case Russell heard us. Remaining silent, I willed her to hurry.
She didn't disappointment me. She turned to leave without a word, but as soon as I thought I was clear, she paused.
No, no, no! What are you doing?
Without a glance back at me, her hand went to her apron and fished around for a moment. When she pulled it out, I heard the dull thud of something hitting the carpet. My wide-eyes stared at her back but she didn't explain or wait for me to ask questions. She left quickly, just as she had the day before.
Confused and intrigued, I rushed to where she had been standing. I ignored the jarring pain as I dropped to my knees and ran my hands over the sticky carpet. After only a few moments of searching, my fingers ran across something hard. As soon as I closed my hand over it, I knew immediately what it was. A ring.
Using the wall to pull myself back to my feet, I took it to the window to hold it up in a ray of light. It was my ring. The one my father had given to me so many Christmases ago. I slumped against the wall and clutched the ring to me, wondering what this meant. Had Mona gone in search of my things or had they already been passed out? Did she do this for me?
I kicked the heel of my boot against the wall in frustration and immediately regretted it. Not just for what the jarring motion did to my shoulder, but for the noise it made. I slid down to my pallet, wanting to appear innocent in case someone came to investigate the noise. No one did.
I ignored the food she had brought, instead staying on my pallet with worry and fear over what I had become. Somehow, I had always feared this. Somewhere in the back of my mind, the seed of doubt had taken hold and I was never able to shake it free. This was the whole reason I had kept my distance from Seth. As much as I was willing to accept him, as much as I wanted to accept him, I couldn't shake the fear of what could happen if I ever did.
Now I knew. I was a walking disease as sure as any of those freaks out there were.
I was still on my pallet when I received my second visitor of the day. I sat up easily to the light of the lantern, and mentally berated myself after seeing the look of surprise on Hawk's face.
"Feeling better?" He asked me as he frowned over the full tray of untouched food. "Or not..." He dropped something bulky alongside it, but I was too worried about Russell to even be curious about it.
"Sure," I answered, my mouth going dry. I was straining to hear any sound that might be coming from the bathroom, but the blood was already rushing through my eardrums, drowning out any distant noise.
Hawk watched me for several minutes with an odd contemplative look on his face. Finally he offered me his hand. I grasped it with my left and winced when he pulled me up. He made sure I was steady on my feet before he moved away.
"Not hungry? I can bring you some more broth." He casually leaned against the desk as he watched me. I tried desperately to hide my growing nervousness.
"No, no more broth, please."
"Okay." He chuckled slightly. "I managed to get my hands on this." He said as his hand moved the bundle into the light and I finally saw what it was. My belt pack! I gasped as I reached for it eagerly.
I quickly went through it, not surprised that some things had been removed, but what I had asked for was there. Two of my books were shoved in the pack, as well as my MP3 player, the locket, and the small black stuffed kitten. Everything else was inconsequential.
"The rest of your things are secured, although you'll never be armed again while you're here." He said in a soft whisper. Looking up into his eyes, I saw something more there than just his words, and wondered if he was eluding to his offer again. "They'll be safe, though. Perhaps Joss can use them when he's healed."
I swallowed hard as I looked away, picking up the stuffed kitten and nervously rubbing its head with my thumb. It was a reminder of where I was and what would happen if I couldn't find my way out of here. Of course, I could just start biting everyone, but that wouldn't save me from Reed.
Suddenly, a thump against the window made me jump. I was so tightly wound from Hawk being in the room with Russell just barely hidden away, the unexpected noise had me shaking so badly I dropped my pack.
"Easy," Hawk said as he reached for it. He handed it back to me with an apologetic smile. The thumps against the window continued as he explained. "Didn't think he'd be out there so fast, but I got your request. Reading light."
He waved toward the window as the screech of nail against wood could be heard from the other side. The room brightened as the large board at the top of the window began to fall away. The lantern wasn’t needed now. At least four inches of the top of the window was uncovered and allowed the natural light in.
I sighed with relief, feeling my shoulders relax a bit,
but I still wasn't able to feel any gratitude towards the man responsible. It felt as if now there would be favors owed, and that made me feel sick to my stomach. As the noise died away outside, I turned to him to force myself to say thank you. Before I could get the words out, I heard it.
There was a thud in the bathroom, and the words caught in my throat. It was as if I was watching in slow motion as Hawk's head started to turn toward the hallway. My hand moved of its own will before my mind could tell it to stop. I reached out, catching Hawk's chin with my fingertips and turning him back to face me. He didn't resist. His shock that I had actually reached out to touch him mirrored my own.
"Thank you." I stammered out, not as graceful as I would have liked. I pulled my hand away quickly, repulsion already swirling in my stomach. His hazel eyes reflected the sunlight and his expression was unreadable. The way he so intently watched me made me increasingly uncomfortable, and I wondered if I had sealed my fate.
The thump came again. This time he didn't flinch, but I knew he heard it. His eyes continued to bore into mine, and I realized his teeth were clenched a little too late.
Hawk was fast. Faster than what I could counter in my weakened state. He grabbed me and spun me around too quickly for me to fight against him. He had me pressed against the wall in seconds. I blinked as the light of the sun shimmered in my eyes.
I shoved him as hard as I could. It knocked him back only a few feet, but I had already dropped to the floor for my last line of defense. It was only after I had pulled my knife on him that I realized he hadn't advanced on me again.
I stood slowly, the sharp pain I was trying to ignore had tears springing to my eyes. My vision kaleidoscoped until I blinked them away. As the tears spilled over, I saw Hawk staring at me blankly. He was ignoring the knife in my hand.
"I know what you are." His words drilled through me and the silence afterwards was suffocating.
The seconds stretched out as I stared at him. He didn't lift a hand to defend himself, but I couldn't advance on him, either. Visions of those dead eyes swarmed me and I knew I didn't have it in me to do it again. Not like this.
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