“A dog. We never had one and neither did you. A dog is a member of the family. You care for it, play with it, companion, friend. Dogs are all those things. They also have a short lifespan. I feel like, if I’d had a dog as a kid, losing my mom wouldn’t have been my first experience with loss. Her death, I knew it was coming, but I had nothing to base those feelings on. I wish I’d had a pet, something I loved I had lost before… I think somehow I would have coped better.” He opened his eyes then. “And her death prepared me to help you. But it’s a cycle, it’s life, and we’re living. I just need the focus to be on living for a while.”
Something was wrong, off. I couldn’t put my finger on it, and though I hoped it was just hormones, I still needed to know if it was my imagination running wild.
“What’s wrong, Ahren?” I asked. “Something’s wrong. This isn’t you. We’ve spoken about all of this…except the dog thing, but I agree. It’s good for kids to have a pet, especially that nothing-lasts-forever life-lesson we all have to learn. It’s easier to start with a dog than a human. You’re worried about something.”
“Yes,” he admitted.
I saw it then, plain as day, he was scared.
“About what specifically? Is it because I’m so sick? This is normal, you know. This happens. It’s just the surge in hormones.”
“No, it isn’t that. Not just that. I am worried about you, but that’s only because I don’t like to see you miserable.” The side of his mouth lifted in a half-smile, but his eyes didn’t join it.
“Ahren—” I tried, but he was quick with his words.
He was still holding my head when he said, “We’ve had a good run, you and I.” He paused and took a deep breath before he continued. “I feel like we’re waiting for the other shoe to drop.”
I held onto his wrists, tears filling my eyes, because what he was saying had been in the back of my mind, too. I didn’t dare tempt those thoughts to come to the forefront. I felt like even entertaining those fears was tempting fate.
“We have to have faith, Ahren.” I kissed his lips softly. “Think of all we’ve been through. I’d like to think that the worst thing that’s gonna happen to us in the next fifty years will be our dog dying.” I smiled and let my forehead rest against his.
He then rocked my world in one of those moments that I’ll never, ever forget. “I know I shouldn’t say this to you, not now, not when your body is changing, you’re getting everything ready for the wedding…”
“You’re wrong, whatever it is. This is exactly what you should be doing. Not keeping things from me, even if you think I can’t handle it. I’m in this with you, all of it, and whatever you’re worried about, I don’t want you to carry that alone.” I took a breath and explained, “I was scared…for so long…scared of feeling, scared of pain, but mostly scared I would have this incredible love and then lose it. I couldn’t face that possibility, but now I know, this, what we have, Ahren. It’s worth the pain.”
He wrapped me in his arms, and I felt him fight against the emotion that came from baring that raw fear to me. He didn’t want me to see it, but him giving it to me made me love him more.
“Little pieces,” I whispered.
“Sorry?” he asked against my hair.
“Just when I think I can’t love you more, you give me another piece to add to my heart.”
“Genevieve,” he said. “I just want to keep you close,” he admitted. “I just want to know you’re never too far that I can’t keep you safe, especially now.”
“Some things are out of our hands. You can’t stop drunk drivers, bad weather, cancer, or heart attacks. You’re good, Ahren, but you’re not that good.”
He moved his head back to look at me, his eyes glittering with tears, and granted me a huge smile. “Thanks, baby.”
“I didn’t do anything.”
“You did exactly what my mom would have done. She would have told me it’s all going to be okay, even if she wasn’t sure. But she wanted to believe it would be, somehow. I forced my way back into your life.” He chuckled. “But I will never regret it.”
“Thank God you did,” I sniffled.
****
Ahren
He was happy that Genevieve had kept her dinner down. Hopefully she was coming out of the worst of this morning sickness thing. He hated to see her so miserable physically, but he knew, emotionally, she was happy. She’d told him that growing up and getting married to him was a dream, and it was going to come true.
He hoped it was going to come true.
Because when bad things happen to good people with no rhyme or reason, shit luck, bad timing, whatever that reason may be…those good people, no matter how happy they are, are always waiting for the other shoe to drop.
Ahren was waiting, and the worst part was this feeling he couldn’t shake. It was a sickening anxiety that made him jerk awake in the middle of the night. It began the minute he realized Gen was pregnant, an irrational panic that took his breath away. But it wasn’t irrational; he knew that better than anyone. In an instant, it could all be gone.
He slipped into bed beside her and watched her breathe. He calmed his mind by focusing on those breaths, like counting sheep, and when he finally found sleep, his last thoughts were of BASE jumping.
It wasn’t like I didn’t know the day was coming, but the death of Gloria was everywhere, and I felt the shock like everyone else. Her suicide was the top local news story for three days, and, just after Lauren was seen laying flowers at the home they shared in San Francisco, Gloria’s dad was quick to steal the show. He told the reporters he would personally investigate every aspect of her death, and claimed, “My daughter would never take her own life.”
Asshole.
Ahren and I took a drive up to Napa a couple of days later and stopped at an Internet café. Gloria had done her research, given me specific instructions, and, without difficulty, I closed all the accounts she’d asked me to. Ahren and I both spoke about how this particular task might come back to bite me in the ass, but if it did, Gloria had a contingency plan. She had a copy sent to her lawyer, along with a letter to her father, and I expected, at some point, he would either make a huge stink about it, or go quietly back to his lair. What I did know, her medical records had “somehow” been leaked, and since that happened, her father had remained quiet.
It was good we had a day to just…be. Wedding plans were complete, and aside from getting beautified on the day, there was nothing left to do. I thought the long drive would send me into a puking frenzy, but I was pleased to report that I’d forgotten to take my medicine that morning and hadn’t felt nauseous at all. I didn’t tell Ahren, just in case it was a fluke. I figured I’d surprise him with sex later.
Each and every time I thought about sex with him, I looked to his crotch and felt everything between my legs swell with need. This was a sexual hunger I had never, ever experienced before. My nipples tingled and hardened against the cup of my padded bra, and, as he made a gentle turn with the new SUV he’d bought last week, the seatbelt hit my nipple and instantly made me wet.
“Oh my God,” I said quietly.
“What is it?” the ever-alert Ahren asked.
“If you find a good place to pull over, do it.” I made my request and put my hands on the dash to steady myself. Just as I moved forward, the seam of my jeans hit my already swollen clit, and if he didn’t hurry, my jeans were going to give me the release I would have preferred Ahren to give me. I’d read about this, of course, the hormones, etcetera, the increase in sexual drive. It wasn’t like we needed any help in that department, but this was like being drunk on little blue pills.
Ahren found a road that turned off the main highway. There was a small group of trees and beyond that, rolling fields of grapevines. He turned off the car and twisted in the seat to look at me, waiting to hear any directive.
So I gave it to him.
“Ahren?” I tried to control the need in my voice by speaking as evenly as possible.
> “What can I do?” he replied attentively.
“Can you take the big blanket out of the back; lay it down in that field, just next to the trees?”
“Baby, if you can’t hang on till we get home, I’ll find somewhere to stay the night.” He started searching his phone.
I took his hand, slowly laced my fingers with his and decided to reword my request. “Ahren, can you take the big blanket out of the back, lay it down in that field, and fuck me like there’s no tomorrow?”
I’d never seen him move so fast. He fumbled with the keys and dropped them into the gravel, swearing and losing his footing at one point. He ran through the trees and flicked the blanket open and carefully straightened the edges. He ran back to the car, huffing and puffing, his chest rising and falling as he flung my door open and slowed his movements to a snail’s pace.
“Let’s go pretend like there’s no tomorrow,” he said with a shit-eating grin.
I bounded out of the car after him. He stopped me with an arm around my waist and said, “I can see you’re feeling better, but let’s not tempt fate. I’m looking forward to this like you would not believe.”
We slowly walked, hand-in-hand, to the blanket where we stood and faced each other. I hadn’t realized how cold it was until my sex-adrenaline was face-to-face with fog settling in the valley in the distance.
“It’s getting pretty cold. And it smells like someone hit a deer near here.” Ahren pulled me into his body, then wrapped his open coat around me.
I looked up at him with the best bedroom eyes I could muster. “I’m thinking this is one of those situations where I open your fly…like this.” I unzipped carefully, feeling his hard length as it strained against his jeans and boxers. I pulled him out and stroked him with my hand.
His head tilted back as his fingers sifted through my hair. “Fuck, that feels good.” All thoughts of the setting sun, the suddenly cold late November weather, and road kill were gone.
As much as I would have liked to drop to my knees and take him in my mouth, my gag reflex probably wouldn’t appreciate that considering the workout it’d been getting. Instead, I went to my knees, dropped my jeans and panties, turned and waited with my ass in the brisk air. I didn’t wait long as he dropped down behind me. His long fingers brushed each cheek gently before they curled onto either hip, and, in one stealthy maneuver, he pushed inside.
My eyes squeezed closed, and my head snapped up in the sheer pleasure of being filled by him. There was an ache, so deep, I kept urging him, “Harder… harder,” to which he responded immediately.
It had been two weeks, or seventeen days if you wanted to be precise, since we’d had sex. We were always intimate, always touching, holding hands, kissing…but I sure missed flat-out fucking, and so, apparently, did he.
After I came, twice, he was slowly working up to his own second coming. I was now on my back, looking to the sky, when I heard footsteps.
Footsteps.
A man cleared his throat, and I mumbled, “Oh no no no no no. No no no. Please don’t be a psycho, please don’t be a psycho.”
“Ahren?” the man asked.
“Chad?” he returned. “Give us a sec, will ya?”
“Sure thing man. But make it quick.” Chad Healy, my best friend’s half-brother, the man who carried me away from my family’s accident, local law enforcement, and hot guy had just seen me and Ahren in the throes of ecstasy, where I was pretty sure I’d said something along the lines of, “Your cock feels enormous,” and “Keep fucking me until the sun comes up tomorrow, baby.”
Clothes on, we walked to Chad, who was leaning against his car, his cell to his ear.
“Yeah,” he said. “Just off the highway at the back of the winery. The fields on this side are empty. Yeah. Yeah, I’ll wait. No problem.”
Before I could hide my embarrassment and Ahren could apologize for trespassing or whatever the hell it was that brought Chad to seek us out, Chad spoke first. “Did you two hear about that missing old guy? Dementia patient? His son reported him missing a few days ago. That winery beyond the hills there is his. He handed it down to his kids. He walks the grounds, but they said he usually stays right around the big house. Anyway, they checked out here already, but I volunteered to drive around and keep my eyes out. Saw your new car parked randomly, some might even say suspiciously… Anyway, he’s lying under those trees about ten feet from where you guys were.”
What?
“Excuse me?” I asked. I felt Ahren squeeze my hand.
“There’re tire marks, a deep skid. The forensics guys will go over all that, but my guess… He was probably out here, it was dark, hit and run. In fact, most drivers would assume with how dark it gets out here, they’d hit a deer.”
“God, just like Darryl Oskin,” I commented under my breath. Ahren caught it, but Chad didn’t.
The thing about being a professional mourner, it’s assumed you have no problem at all with dead bodies. And normally, I probably wouldn’t. However, this was what you called a special situation. There’s strong stomach and there’s downright creepy stomach with the addition of pregnancy. This was beyond creepy.
I slowly turned from Ahren and took huge, cleansing breaths while chanting to myself, “I will not throw up. I will not throw up.”
His hand was at my back. “Gen?” he asked.
But I just shook my head. I was afraid to talk for fear of puking.
“At least we got to have some great fucking sex,” he whispered.
Then he was laughing. I could hear him trying to keep from laughing, and worse, Chad had joined him as he walked up to me and put his cell phone near my ear.
“Rocky wants to talk to you.”
Great.
“Dude,” I said carefully. “I’m… Dude.”
She was laughing hysterically before she spoke. “I just want to say, your life is super fun.”
“I have to speak quietly or the puke fairy might join our conversation. I was feeling great all day, so I’m thinking this bout of nausea is because of the rotting corpse smell I can’t get out of my nose now.”
“Gross,” she said. “Kinda surprised that bugs you though.”
“Me, too, but this is… ” I walked farther away from Chad and Ahren, farther away from the origin of the smell, and whispered to Rocky, “this is like a horror movie scene. We were having sex right next to a dead body.”
“If you reached out your hand, could you touch him?”
“Well, no,” I replied.
“Then it’s not right next to him. I get it; it’s weird, but from what Chad said, you guys were really going at it. Don’t let the dead guy ruin a great memory.” I just listened and kept taking deep breaths as another car pulled up. “Gen, this is one of those times when you’ll be old and sitting on the dock Ahren rebuilt and you’ll say, ‘Remember that time we fucked on the edge of that vineyard where that dead body was?’ It’ll be dinner party conversation that’ll make your kids cover their ears and say, ‘Lah lah lah.’ You hear what I’m saying?”
“How’s married life?” I asked, changing the subject. My friend had found the silver lining.
“Married life isn’t much different than non-married life. Awesome because I’ve got a great guy, piece of paper or not.” She was my maid of honor and right-hand man when it came to, well, everything wedding. “It’s going to be a beautiful day, honey.”
We wrapped up our conversation, and I gave Chad his phone back. It had beeped twice with another call trying to get through, and, considering the circumstances, I thought I better not tie it up anymore.
We were two hours from Greer’s Rest when we’d pulled over. I’d managed to snooze a bit, and once we were away from the smell I would now file away in my “don’t go any closer” pile, I no longer felt sick. Hallelujah. No sooner had we arrived home did my cell ring.
“Hello?” I said into the phone.
“Genevieve…” Cheryl spoke the next words carefully. “You better come down… Bryce.”
Ahren convinced me to eat something, assuming we would have a long night ahead of us. I quickly showered and changed my clothes before we made our way to The Elms. He stood at the door and watched as I took up residence next to Bryce and held his hand.
Bryce lifted the oxygen mask from his face and said, “Cookie. Might not make it to your wedding.”
I was ready for this. I’d told myself on the drive there, I was ready. He’d hired me. I was meant to be strong for him.
“Sorry, Gen girl. Reaper’s an asshole like that.” He grinned and put the mask back to his face while I wiped away a tear. “Where’s your fella?” he asked, his voice muffled.
“Hello, Bryce.” Ahren was suddenly behind me with his hands on my shoulders.
“She loves you somethin’ fierce. Lucky… Great titties on her.”
Ahren chuckled silently while Bryce’s mouth moved into a slow smile then removed his mask again.
“Cookie, I’ve got a DNR,” he breathed. “Part of me wants to change it so I can be there for ya. First time I’ve ever entertained the thought of being kept alive by a machine.” He took a few more labored breaths, and I could see the energy it took. “Gimme a kiss, Cookie.”
I leaned in and kissed his cheek, and Bryce held my hand.
“I’ll be sure to keep your family company over there at Eden Hills. I’ll grab my Missus and head on over for a good old-fashioned haunting. You put out five glasses of champagne for them on your wedding night so we don’t have to all share, you hear me?” I nodded, not speaking a word. He put the mask back on. “Time to go, Cookie.” He spoke as he closed his eyes. “Gonna miss ya… You walk to your man on the big day, hold your head high, know you got people alive and dead walking every step of the way with ya… Love ya, girl.”
And he was gone. Just like that.
My sobs came fast and hard, my entire body buckling with each one. I laid my head on his shoulder to hug him and realized that Bryce, the quintessential bitter, old man had opened up to me, and in doing so, he opened a part of my heart that I’d kept closed up tight for years.
The Morbid and Sultry Tales of Genevieve Clare Page 19
