“Your bed, baby,” I answer the wind knocked out of my sails by now leaving me slightly confused and nervous.
“So?” He asks his eyes opened wide.
“So?” I ask trying to keep up and not be totally distracted by not only watching him, but by my own thoughts.
“Are you my girl or not.” He asks again. Yes. I want to say yes, but I can’t. Both of us silent till he shakes his head and he mutters, “Fuck angel, I swear.”
“Parker,” I start to say but the look he gives me means business, and I am smart enough to stay quiet.
I watch silently as he finishes folding the table. The entire time I’m pretty sure he’s saying things under his breath that I can’t make out. Then with one last exasperated look at me, shaking his head he walks out of my room. With KC’s massage table in tow.
I sit up in my bed, still covered in my favorite lavender cotton sheet. It is so worn that it’s probably time to get rid of but I loved it too much to toss. It was one of the first things I bought myself when I turned eighteen and left the foster care system. Sitting in the silence of my room I can hear KC and Parker talking, but it isn’t loud enough to make out what they’re saying.
On one hand, I’m glad it isn't loud. I’m glad because it means that KC and Parker aren’t fighting. I heard the distinct sound of the front door of my apartment open and close, heavy footsteps heading towards my room. My door opens and Parker’s large body graces my doorway. He steps in, closing the door behind him.
“So?” He stands in front of me, his hands at his hips.
As hot as he looks ruffled up and pissed, I’m now annoyed. Not because he’d just had a mini fit about me having a massage. We could have had a conversation about that. No. I was annoyed he’d just sent my friend away. A friend, who was taking time from his schedule and had come to me, a friend, who I hadn’t seen in a long time. A friend, who I didn’t even get to say good bye too!
“Umm”, I mutter out. Not because I’m unsure of what to say. No, I know what I want to say, I’m just not sure of how to say it.
“Really?” He says taking off his muscle tank, throwing it carelessly towards my dresser, falling haphazardly over my pretty perfume bottles. This granted is hot, except it is also the wrong thing to do. My patience not only was worn thin, it was worn out. My back hurts, he suddenly had a cannoli up his ass about changing the rules between us and he sent my friend away and was making a mess in my room!
“Park…” My heart is beating hard.
My mind is running a million miles a second. Was this a bad side of him that somehow I hadn't realized? I haven’t been the brightest crayon in the box in the past about finding good guys. I’d shit luck attracting and finding decent men in the past. I stare at him slightly tongue tied, because that happens to me when I am pissed or scared. Sure enough I felt a lot of one and a smidge of the other.
Parker’s a big guy with strong, clearly defined rock hard muscles. He has big hands with a huge amount of strength in them. Suddenly I feel a lot smaller than him and slightly defenseless. I didn’t like feeling defenseless or weak. Been there done that and owned the t-shirt from when I was a kid in foster home after foster home. I prided on having left those feelings behind me. My body is stiff and I unconsciously tighten my hold on the soft lavender sheet.
I’m trying to think rationally, knowing that nothing about Parker has ever raised a red flag before, but can’t seem to snap the bad thoughts of the past away.
All I know is that my back aches, Park sent my masseuse/friend packing and we might or might not be arguing about me being his girl.
Which in itself, I’m not even sure if he means girlfriend, a girl friend, or one of his “girls.” Not that we’ve even discussed the possibility of either of us seeing anyone else. I know his work schedule can be flexible and between the times I work at the shop and the late nights finishing up cakes, he could technically still be seeing someone else and it wouldn't reflect on him because this conversation hasn't been brought up.
Not that I like the idea of him fucking someone else while we’ve been seeing one another, and off the top of my head there were three reasons for this. One, we’ve been having unprotected sex and I seriously don't want to catch something. Two, to me Parker is one of the good guys. I don't know him that well, we’ve only been seeing one another for a little over a month and a half and the entire time I actually let him in. Not just in my pants but into my heart. A heart I kept hidden behind thick concrete walls. I’m still not sure why or how I let him in, I just had... from the start. Third reason I don't want to think that he’s fucking someone else is because I don't want him to be like Jake. Jake and I had been through hell and finding out he’d messed around had burned me. Yet with Jake, even after three years I hadn’t let him in, not the way Parker had wormed his way in only after a month and a half. If I’m being honest, I’d never really let anyone in the way I let Parker in. Parker had the capability to do much, much worse than just burn me.
“To be in your mind right now, it’d probably be fucking confusing.” He says, still standing away from me, but somehow I’d missed quite a show while I’d been inside my own thoughts.
He’s now shirtless, the top button of his dress pants undone and his belt on the floor his feet bare of shoes. His arms crossed over his broad chest, and he’s just staring at me. His beautiful, usually smiling face, scowling.
“What?” I ask stupidly. I know I’m getting on his nerves. I can tell. A blind person could tell. But I’m lost. So many different feelings and thoughts washing over me and I’m not sure what I want. Liar a little voice in me says.
“It’s not a tough question, angel,” he hisses.
I usually like when he calls me angel. That’s not true, I always do. Except for how he’s using it right this moment. Snide and sarcastic as if I am stupid. Walls I thought came down start to build-up within me slowly.
“I don’t know!” I blurt out holding tighter onto the sheet in my hands. I’m just as confused as I am pissed. “I don’t know if you mean girl as in girlfriend. Or do you mean a friend who's a girl or just a fuck buddy type your girl!” My voice is getting louder with every word that comes out of my mouth. Frustrated and semi-turned on, I glare at him.
“You have to be shitting me,” he growls.
“I’m serious, Parker! Have you asked me to be anything to you? No. You haven’t. We hang out.You cook for me. I bake for you. We sleep together. We have amazing sex. But do I know where I stand with you? No. I don’t. I don’t because YOU haven’t told me.” I huff out and since I’m on a roll, I keep going, “I get that I made it easy for you, sleeping together before we even knew one another for twenty-four hours, but for all I know this is what you do. For all I know you are seeing someone else as well.”
Sitting on the edge of my bed didn’t help in the least because it put me at a severe height disadvantage. I had a spring box and mattress but no frame, I wasn’t super tall and he was. Standing in front of me as I speak, I notice his face changes. From clearly angry, to trying to hide his amusement. Then giving up and letting it show he is clearly being entertained. As hot as he looks, it grates on my nerves
He kneels in front of me. Knees to the ground, bright smile that shows me his straight white teeth, dancing grey eyes, smiling so much his dimple shows and the cute little lines by his eyes deepen.
“Angel…”
“What? It’s true! And why are you smiling? A second ago you were pissed!”
“You’re cute,” he says smiling and I huff. CUTE!
“Puppies are cute, Parker.” I say seriously as I try to stand up. Try being the key word because the moment I do, he put his hands on my thighs to keep me where I am. Frustrated, achy, my feelings hurt and my mind confused, I am not amused by him.
“You’re smart and funny.” He says, making me freeze, my mind blanking just to hear and take in what he has to say, “So damn beautiful, I can’t take my eyes off of you. A complete hard ass that has a platinum shell
to protect herself with, but the moment someone gets in there... you care and love fiercely. I’ve seen you do it. You’re blindly loyal, completely giving. You have been through so much shit that it makes sense for you to have that shell around you and never put it down. But you do, you put it down more than you think you do. Not only with your girls, but fuck, baby, mostly everyone that comes in contact with you.” He tells me, his eyes and voice so damn honest something hitches inside of my chest.
“The moment I laid eyes on you, I knew. I knew you were special. I saw you across a room, and I knew. It only took one look. Then by chance I saw you at that gala. Found out your name, even though I made a complete ass out of myself asking stupid fucking questions about a fake cake just knowing your name made it easier for me to breathe. Then the moment at the bar at Wind, buying you a drink, talking to you, I knew you were it for me. I didn’t see you coming. I didn’t think someone like you even existed for me.” He says so damn honest and open I feel like the wind has been sucked right out of me.
Never in my life has someone been that emotionally honest with me. It’s beautiful and so damn special, but at the same time is terrifying, and I have no idea what to do with that.
Parker
Her eyes are starting to get watery and she looks away from me. My strong angel doesn’t like to show her weaknesses and crying to her is one of them, so I keep talking as I gently press my fingers under her chin to make her look at me.
“I’ve never taken a girl back to my place. Ever! I’ve made you stay with me since that first night. What did you think I wanted?” I ask honestly and she swallows hard. I can tell she’s fighting away tears. So damn strong trying not to show her vulnerable side, I don’t like making her uncomfortable, but I’m done. This isn’t just a casual thing between us, even if she has tried to trick herself into thinking it is.
“I want you to be mine. My girlfriend! Shit, babe I’m thirty-four, be my woman.” Her eyes wide, as I tell her as honestly as I can. I watch as she breathes in deep and straightens herself out.
"But you hardly know me...," she whispers and I smile.
"Ellie... I know you." I tell her confidently.
"No. You don't."
"Fine. I don’t know every single thing, but I know what's important about you."
"No, honey...."
"I know what's important to me." I tell her and it's true. I want her. For however long this can work. Shit, for however long I can make her smile. Whether its thirty-seven days or fifty-seven years, I want her. I want there to be an, us. An official us.
"You really want me?" She asks so softly I could have easily not heard her if my eyes weren't fixed on her face.
I’ve only known her for a month and a half. I don't know all her expressions yet. The one on her face right now is special. I know this because my girl doesn’t show her vulnerability to anyone. Yet here, looking up at me, her face soft and open, she sits in front of me completely exposed like a turtle without its shell.
"You scare me." She whispers, a slight tremble in her bottom lip that she quickly bites down on.
"Why?" I ask carefully.
"You could seriously hurt me." She says looking at me. Every fiber in my body clenches. I wonder if Jake did more damage than she’d told me. The thought of Thompson raising his hand to her, made my blood heat up.
"I'd never hurt you." I told her my voice gruff. I never would. I would work hard to never hurt her.
She breathes in deep, her sweet, dark browns on me.
"I think we should take things a day at a time. Get to know one another..."
"Fine." I say and I see relief yet a little sadness in her eyes, “We can take it a day at a time. That's fine. But it's with the understanding that we are going through each day together."
"Park..."
"I'm serious, angel." I kneel in front of her, moving her hair from her face, "I don't share, Ellie. Especially, not with shit that's important to me. Needless to say you fall into that category.”
"I don't think I'm thrilled at being labeled as cute and 'shit that's important'…,” she sasses and I answer her back the only way I know how. Honestly.
"Tough because that’s what you are. I’ll be honest I'm not usually like this. Usually, I only do no strings attached with women. I can do that with my eyes fucking closed, and to be even more honest it's usually me making sure the lines are written in stone from the beginning. But then again, I hadn’t met you yet.”
“Park.” She gasps softly.
“It’s true.” I tell her and she stays quiet. Silently staring at me, until the moment I see it in her eyes that she’s made a decision.
“Okay.” she says rolling her eyes playfully at me.
“Okay what?” I press, needing to hear her say it.
“I’ll be yours, if you’re mine,” her voice is soft and I can’t help the way happiness soars through my body side by side with the blood in my veins. I pull her close to me, burying my head at her neck, and I laugh. I’ve never been this happy.
I move my face in front of hers and I kiss her. Slow and sweet, but enough to remind her of everything we share. Pulling away I look at her, and like every time I look at her she takes my breath away. Except this time it’s more. I’m looking at MY girl. My woman! Mine.
“Park…” She starts to say, but I kiss her again and she surprises me by pulling away, something a lot like fear in her eyes.
“What is it?” I ask cupping her soft face in my hands and she bites her lower lip nervously.
“I don’t share either….”
“Babe…”
“I think you get that… Jake and I…”
“I’m not him.” I growl, a small delicate finger coming to my lips.
“I know. Just let me say this okay?” She says and I nod, picking her up, sitting down on her bed, her perfect round ass on my lap is covered in a soft purple sheet.
“Okay talk to me.”
Taking a deep breath looking into my eyes, her guarded chocolate brown staring at me.
“You get under my skin.”
“Good.”
“I’m serious,” she says hitting my shoulder playfully.
“I am too.” I tell her sincerely. Her eyebrows go up.
“I’m so drawn to you it isn’t funny. I didn’t believe someone could even feel the way I do. I want to be under your skin, because you’re under mine. I want you to be as latched on to me as I am to you.” I tell her, meaning every word.
“Wow.” She whispers and I smile.
“So is heart to heart time done?” I ask smiling, and she nods. Leaning my face into hers, I kiss her softly.
“Tell me you’re my girlfriend.” I demand, as something courses through my veins. Need, urgent and primal need. That’s what it is.
“I’m your girlfriend.” She whispers against mine and I kiss her hard. Pulling my lips away, I stand us up, gently having her stand up next to me beside her bed, letting go of her body.
“Lay back, baby, on your stomach in the middle of the bed for me.” I tell her and she looks at me slightly surprised.
“No one touches you ever, just me. So that means if my angel needs a rub down, I’m the one that’s going to give it to her. I’m the only one that gets to see this hot body naked. I’m the only one who gets to hear you whimper and moan in pleasure.” I tell her. Just the thought of anyone else touching or seeing what’s mine has me seeing red.
“My back really does hurt, Park,” she says sounding doubtful and I smile. She probably just thinks I want to get in her pants. I do, but that’s not the point.
“I get that, angel.” I tell her.
Frowning and biting her lower lip, she goes to the center of the bed. As she starts to get comfortable, I get the body oil KC gave me. It wasn't that I thought he was going to get handsy with her, because it was obvious that wasn’t going to happen.
It was more of the fact that since laying eyes on my angel I had somehow regressed and turned part caveman. As fucked as
that was, when it came to her being mine, and protecting what’s mine… I didn’t give a shit. I’d do anything for her.
For my angel, I’d fight at the gates of hell to get her back if I had too, and I sure as hell won’t share.
Liz
He starts at my feet softly, his rough calloused hands feel good as they calmly and gently work my feet, moving from my ankles to my calves and shins all the way up behind my thighs. His hands were magic. I had been getting massages from KC for years and never had it felt this damn good. It didn’t hurt that Parker was the one touching me and it turned me on. His body shifted onto the bed, making it dip as he straddles me, sitting right below my bottom.
“Am I too heavy?” He asks and I shake my head, enjoying his weight on me.
“No. I like you on me.” I tell him, my head is resting on my favorite pillow. The pillow that smells of him.
He starts at my scalp slowly, gently working it and never once pulling my hair. His agile hands move down to my shoulders. Digging and soothing into my flesh in a way that teeters on the line of pain and pleasure. But mostly pleasure. Pain seems to disappear beneath his touch. His fingers massage deep with a confident strength, as he works out all the knots in my shoulder blades. His fingers relax me fully as he rubs out the knots on my upper back. He only stops to add more oil to his hands. The room fills with the familiar citrusy scent of the oil KC usually used on me. At that moment I know I’d never be able to smell lemons again without thinking of Parker.
His hands on my body, the sweet lemon scent in the air makes me want to bake him something with the citrusy fruit. Lemon tarts, lemon cookies. His hands work magic on my spine and sides until he reaches my lower back. Not able to hold back my groans as his two big strong hands are splayed at my lower back reminding me of the hot way he’d held my waist the night before. I squirm slightly.
“Too hard?” He asks. His voice is thick and deep the way it gets when he’s turned on.
“No”, I say trying to sound unaffected, but I know I can’t fool him. My voice is soft and breathy.
His hands move lower, working the skin and muscles right above my ass. I feel him lift his body slightly off of me.
Etched in Stone (Six Degrees Series Book 2) Page 17
