Isabella thought of screaming. Thelma was not far away, but as she opened her mouth to yell Tiger swooped. Isabella did the first thing that came to mind. She bit his lip.
"Ouch. You wretch!" He stepped back, stroking his tongue over the drop of blood she'd drawn.
"I may not be able to kill you, but I'll fight you in any way I can, Tiger Carstairs. Leave me be."
"Jesus." He turned away, and Isabella saw his shoulders heave as he dragged in a deep breath. "What do you do to me? You turn me into a man I hardly recognize."
"What do I do to you?" she sneered. "You've ruined my life, and you ask that. I wish you'd left me to Malloy. At least there I knew what life had in store for me."
"You have your new husband, Bella, now get out of my sight before I do something I'll regret."
"What? Such as beat me? You've already raped me and put a babe in my belly, what else is there but killing me?"
"Rape? Never that." His tone softened as he turned to stare at her from beneath lowered brows. "Accuse me of all else, but never that. And please don't start that nonsense about the child again."
"The babe will be born in September, you'll see. And it'll look like its father. You." Unable to face his scorn she ran to her room. Only it wasn't her room any more, but her and her husband's.
As she was stepping out of her dress a soft tap came on the door. Before she had a chance to ask who was there Dougal came in.
He eyed her silently as he put his new clothes on the end of the bed, then said, "I'll just leave these with you, will I? I . . . I'll best be off. See you later on." He shuffled about a bit, then left the room in a rush.
With a ragged sigh she slumped beside his new trousers. What had she done? There was no going back now. Damnation on Tiger Carstairs. May he rot in hell, for she was already in a hell of his making.
Chapter Twenty Two
Isabella stared at her marriage bed and ran a hand over the starched, crisp sheet Thelma had, that morning, helped her put on.
Her friend's eyes had been sympathetic as she'd said, "Make the most of a bad job, Bella. Dougal's a good man, better for you by far than Tiger."
"I know that, Thelma. That great English dolt can go and jump into a river and never surface as far as I'm concerned."
"Aye," Thelma agreed, knowing they both lied.
Now Isabella shuddered as she waited for Dougal to join her. He was bathing out the back. Tiger had ridden off after the evening meal. Thank the Lord—how she would have borne sharing Dougal's bed for the first time with Tiger on the other side of the wall, so near, yet so far, she didn't know.
How could she have let him make love to her again this morning? She must be the whore he'd named her for giving in to him so easily. But it would never happen again, she swore. The door creaked behind her and she gave a startled cry.
"Did I frighten you?" Dougal asked as he came into the room, closing the door after him. "Sorry I took so long." He hovered just inside the room, looking young. And very dark.
Isabella bit her lip. For all she cared he could have taken all night. Goodness, she had to pull herself together. Dougal was her husband and he had rights. Feeling numb, she stretched out on the bed, pulling the sheet up to her chin.
Apart from trousers Dougal wore nothing else. She'd seen him without a shirt before so for the life of her couldn't understand why his bare chest made her feel intimidated. Black hair curled thickly over his front, tapering to his stomach, contrasting dramatically with Tiger's fine golden body hair.
Sitting beside her he reached out to finger a lock of her hair, his eyes meeting hers for the first time since he'd come in. Her toes and fingers clenched as his knuckle brushed her cheek.
"You look beautiful," he said softly, reaching to pull the sheet from her fingers. For a moment she resisted, but then realized how foolishly she was behaving, and allowed him to pull it back. "Let me look at my wife."
His voice held a strange hard edge that made her nervous.
"Please?" Without her consent he began to undo the front of her nightgown. Isabella clutched at his wrist as he fiddled awkwardly with the ribbons.
"Wait," she pleaded.
He ignored her, working his way down painstakingly until every tie was released, his eyes intent, absorbed on his task. Then with a jerk he pulled the sides of the bodice apart, gasping as he laid her breasts bare to his gaze.
"I've waited an' waited, Bella. The waiting time is over." As he spoke he began to fondle her, lowering his head to suckle her. "You're mine now, an' I'll touch you, an' look at you as much as I want." His voice was hoarse and while he fondled one breast he pulled on the other greedily with his mouth.
Isabella willed herself to relax. She owed him that much. Waiting for the ache of longing that always shafted through her at Tiger's touch she was sorely disappointed. All she felt was revulsion. Biting back a moan of repugnance she pushed at his shoulders. He just groaned and tugged her nightdress lower to expose her belly.
"Dougal," she bit out. "I don't feel like this. I'm sorry. It must be because of the baby. Could we please just lie beside each other for a while?" She hated the pleading note in her voice.
"Don't feel like it?" He stood and began to take off his trousers, all the time staring down at her, his eyes roving over her bare breasts. "Because of the baby, you reckon, eh?"
Isabella nodded, pulling the fronts of her gown together as he turned to hang his trousers behind the curtain. He frowned when he saw she'd covered herself, leaning over and uncovering her again with little effort. Then with one easy movement he peeled the gown down her body and tossed it aside. She tried to cover her nakedness with her arms. His eyes blazed now with a heat she recognized as lust.
His manhood was swollen and she shifted her eyes to his face as he knelt beside her, pressing it on her thigh. "Well now, if it's the baby that's turning you off making love with your husband, kindly tell me how you could lay with the great Tiger on this very morn; the day you was to wed me." He shouted the last sentence. "I ought to whip you."
A man she didn't know was glaring at her.
"I . . . How do you . . .? What do you mean?" she whispered as he loomed over her.
"Spare me the lies, Bella. I saw you with my own eyes, giving yourself willingly to the great Tiger. He's right, you're a whore. Damn you."
"Then how could you wed me?" she cried. "Knowing I made love with him, how could you bring yourself to go ahead with the marriage?" She scrambled away from his hands as they began to wander over her belly and up to her breasts again. "You're no better than me." Tears coursed down her cheeks, but he ignored them. He pulled her back to his side, gripping her arms as he caressed her thighs, outside and in between her legs.
"'Tis simple. I always wanted you. He doesn't want you for anything other than to satisfy his lust. Well, now you're legally my wife an' if he so much as puts a finger on you I'll kill him. Even if I swing for it, I'll do it. You're mine."
"How can you say such things?" she croaked. Dougal, her friend, had disappeared.
"Easy." His fingers were delving inside her as he spoke and she shuddered. He didn't appear to notice her revulsion. Or if he did didn't care. "An' Tiger knows how I feel, don't fear."
"I'll not give myself willingly, Dougal," she said through stiff lips, her insides shriveling. Pressing her legs together as tight as she was able she tried to wriggle away from him, without success. He pressed harder with his fingers and she bit back a cry of pain.
"No matter. I'll take you, Bella. It could have been different." His voice broke. "I loved you with all my heart, an' you shoved that love down my throat." He threw his head back as if in some kind of agony. "I know it's his babe in your belly, but I'm not so proud I won't take his leavings. Now be still." A large hand pressed onto her belly, and she tried to shift it. But he covered her body with his, grunting when she thumped at his shoulders.
"Don't carry on like a virgin," he hissed. "How many men did you have while you was off with that Drake who
re, eh?"
"None. Dougal, I've lain with no man but Tiger. Please believe me," she sobbed. "Don't do this."
"I must. Now relax." His order came through gritted teeth as he began to push into her.
"No!"
Her scream echoed from wall to wall of the tiny room. Isabella fought with every ounce of strength within her. "This is rape, Dougal," she cried. "I thought you cared for me."
"I did. But you tossed my love to the dogs time an' time again. I must have you. You belong to me. Now be still, for pity's sake," he growled.
But she could not, would not, allow him to violate her this way. "Get off me." She bucked, and he cursed again.
"Never!"
Hitting out with her fists she caught him around the ears and shoulders. He grunted, rearing back onto his haunches. "Lie still, or so help me I'll bash you," he shouted, grabbing her shoulders and shaking her mercilessly.
Isabella brought her knee up and caught him where his manhood pulsed.
He sucked in a breath, warning, "Why, you wildcat, do that again, an' I'll. . ."
She cut him off with a fist to his mouth. That really angered him, and he threw her back, pressing her down with his weight until she couldn't breathe. Pinning her arms above her head he started to press inside her again. Isabella screamed, an agonizing sound that gurgled up from her throat.
"Jesus. Shut up," he roared, and when that didn't stop her he clasped both of her wrists in one hand and brought the other back to slap her full across the mouth with the back of it.
The door suddenly thumped back on its hinges and Tiger yelled, "What in heaven's name is going on in here?"
Dougal was so deep in the throes of his release that for a minute he ignored Tiger. But as he groaned and spilled his seed into Isabella he turned his face to stare up at Tiger, who stood at the end of the bed. Never had Isabella seen such a look in Tiger's eyes. If she hadn't known better she would have thought he was ready to murder Dougal.
"Get out," Dougal ordered hoarsely, rolling onto his back. Isabella tried to cover herself; futilely, for the sheet was caught beneath Dougal. A dark tide of shame washed over her and she moaned, wishing she were dead.
Tiger left, but a moment later returned with a cloth, which he handed to Isabella. "Wipe the blood off your mouth," he ordered, his face grim as death as he glared at Dougal, who still lay with his legs spread, flaunting his nakedness.
"Cover yourself." Reaching down, Tiger picked up her nightgown and passed it to her. Isabella caught a fleeting look of pain on his face before he masked it. "You too, man." With an angry oath he dragged the sheet from under Dougal and flung it over him.
Dougal wiped a hand over his face, then sat up, the sheet draped over his lower body. "This is all your fault." He shook a fist at Tiger.
"My fault? Come, man, surely you can't blame me for your behavior. You acted no better than an animal."
Dougal muttered a vile word and Isabella wondered where her shipboard friend had gone; the one who was always so patient, caring, and devoted. Never had she heard him use such language.
"If you'd controlled your lust she would have come willingly to me," Dougal went on. "But no, the great lover Tiger Carstairs has to win every willing female in these parts. Why couldn't you leave well alone? She would have grown to love me one day." Dropping his head into his hands he groaned.
Tiger pounced on him, dragging him up by the shoulders. The sheet fell to the floorboards, but neither man seemed to notice. Tiger's exclamation was like a growl as he bit out, "You can't make anyone love you if they haven't the feeling in them. You're a fool Dougal. Why didn't you take it gently, then perhaps she would have grown to care for you? But let me tell you I'll have no man in my house who takes a fist to a woman. Put one finger on her in anger again and I'll have you flogged. And this isn't an idle threat, believe me. You may be a free man, but I'll still see you get what you deserve."
Dougal stumbled, falling onto his hands. Standing, he took his trousers from the peg and tugged them on, sneering, "Have no fear—I've no more fancy to share her bed. Lord knows why I've pined after her all this time." He gave Isabella a look of repugnance. "You're welcome to the trollop." He stormed from the room.
For long moments Tiger stood looking at Isabella's hunched form. She looked like a trapped animal. Feeling like the lowest form of animal himself he went and touched a finger to her shoulder. She shrank back as if he'd hit her.
"I'm sorry," he said, but she curled into a ball and for all he knew hadn't even heard him.
Dougal was right. This was his fault. But who'd have thought such a kindly person would turn into a monster. Perhaps all men had a streak of the animal in them. Even one as seemingly subdued as Dougal.
Even while he deplored Dougal's actions some dark part of him reveled in the knowledge that Isabella had given herself willingly to him, yet fought not to yield to her new husband. Something wasn't right, for if she'd grown acquainted with whoring while at Selena's then surely she would have no problem coupling with Dougal, who'd always so blatantly adored her.
Could he have made a horrendous mistake?
"Bella, are you all right?" he asked quietly.
Wiping the cloth across her eyes she turned slowly to face him. A sneer twisted her beautiful mouth. "Aye. But I'd be much better if I was miles away from here. I wish more than anything in life I didn't have to set my eyes on your hateful face again. And I don't wish to be a wife to Dougal. Can you get me unmarried as swiftly as you arranged for me to be wed?"
"I can't do that, Bella, as you well know." Tiger shrugged. "If it's any consolation I hate myself just as much as you do."
"Impossible." She turned her back on him. Waiting a moment more, he slowly left the room. Her muffled sobs tore at his heart.
"What a mess," Thelma said as he entered the kitchen.
"Thelma. What are you doing up?" Tiger dragged out a chair and sat down opposite her, resting his elbows on the table. Wiping his palms down his jaw he shivered.
"Could anyone have slept through her screams? I was going to her when I heard you in there." Thelma lifted a hand to push back her hair wearily. "I thought you intended to stay away all night."
"I had. But then I got to thinking it was useless to shy away from my own home. As it worked out 'twas a good thing I returned. I would never have dreamed a man could change so much, Thelma."
"A man who's eaten up with jealousy can be driven to all sorts of things. Even murder." Thelma gave him a thunderous look.
Tiger ran his fingers through his hair, then rubbed at a temple where a sharp pain was beginning to throb. "I thought his love would be enough for the two of them."
"You're a fool, Tiger. I can't believe you're so blind. Like you said to him, no one on this earth can force their feelings. You've done wrong by her. But 'tis no use crying over spilt milk. What's going to happen now?"
Tiger shook his head despairingly. "By all that's holy, I'm sure I don't know. Perhaps she'll come round."
"Perhaps that grate over there'll take wings and fly." Thelma pushed herself up.
Tiger noticed her wince as she dragged in a labored breath.
"D'you think I should go to her?" Undecided she glanced at the door at the rear of the kitchen. Isabella was still sobbing softly.
"Who knows, Thelma." He grimaced. "You're a woman, you work it out. I'm going to take my flagon to my room and try to drown out all thoughts of what happened this night."
"Aye. Typical."
Tiger chose to ignore that as he picked up the rum flask and strode to his room. But unfortunately the rum did nothing to drown out the sound of Bella's sobs from the next room.
He'd intended to stay away for fear of what the sounds of their coming together would do to him, never suspecting her plaintive sobs would keep him from sleep and tear his heart asunder. Something had brought him home, some premonition of disaster. The cards had failed to hold his interest. In fact he'd lost on every hand he'd been dealt, his concentration on the g
ame was so lacking.
Contrary to what she thought of him he did have a heart and it was aching fit to break. God, how could he have been so arrogant? And so stupid.
Chapter Twenty Three
June 1819
"You can't go on like this, Bella," Thelma chided, six months into Isabella's pregnancy.
"Like what?" Isabella knew quite well what her friend meant but deliberately chose to pretend she didn't feel so tired, bored and impatient with everything and everyone. Her whole world had shrunk to encompass nothing but the child growing inside her.
"You know what I mean, it seems like every shred of energy and love of life has left you, girl. How's it going with Dougal now? The two of you seem to have worked through your differences."
Isabella's mouth twisted in a travesty of a smile. "Aye," she agreed. She had allowed Dougal into her bed, but the atmosphere was so strained between them even the placid Gillie noticed. "We don't seem to talk any more. That way we don't argue. I gained a husband, Thelma, and lost a friend."
"He hasn't hit you again, has he?" Thelma eyed Isabella warily, her arms crossed.
"Oh no. I don't know for sure if he's scared Tiger will keep his word and have him arrested, or if he simply doesn't care enough to raise a hand or his voice in anger. Poor Dougal. I can see his side of things, you know. I should never have let him wed me." She stared down at the simple gold band on her finger, twisting it around. "I wouldn't be the first mother to have no husband. The colony's alive with bastard children."
"Tiger should have taken on his responsibilities." Thelma made a sound of disgust as she shook her head. "He should have married you."
"I wouldn't marry him if he was the only man alive. It would have turned out a bigger mess than it is now. He would have ended up hating me even more than he does now."
"He don't hate you, girl," Thelma contradicted, her eyes filled with sadness.
"No?" Isabella shrugged, rubbing her neck. "Perhaps you're right. He don't care enough to have such strong emotions where I'm concerned." Tiger ignored her, if anything. He was rarely home these days, and when he was he treated her with an indifference that was soul destroying.
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