His Baby Bombshell

by Jessica Matthews

  "I didn't know fairies were of the male persuasion."

  "How else does one get little fairies?" he teased.

  "How else, indeed?" she said wryly.

  A car door slammed in the distance. "I suppose that's my cue to get up." He brushed a stray lock of hair off her cheek before he planted a swift, hard kiss on her mouth. "I must say, though, I feel like a teenager who's hoping his parents won't come home unexpectedly."

  "The joys of necking in the living room."

  "All the more reason to move," he countered. "As much as I enjoyed the sofa, I'd prefer a bed, especially in a room without impressionable ears."

  "Aren't you assuming there will be a next time?" she asked as she dressed quickly, aware of Adrian doing the same.

  "Yes, I am," he said boldly. "Which is why we need to talk." He plopped back on the couch and patted the cushion beside him in an invitation to join him.

  Suddenly wary, she sat at the opposite end. "About what?"

  "About what comes next. I want to acknowledge Jeremy as my son."

  She'd expected this discussion, but she'd hoped to postpone it for a few more weeks. While unveiling him as Jeremy's father wouldn't be easy and she didn't know what sort of reception he'd receive afterwards from the staff who'd taken her under their wings, she was willing to tell the world. "If you want to announce you're his father, go ahead, but I'd like some advance notice."

  "I don't want to just go public," he said. "I want my position to be recognized legally."

  She'd always anticipated his request and, in fact, she was surprised he'd warned her of his intention, but she'd hoped to postpone any official action for a while. Sharing Jeremy on paper seemed to bring her one step closer to losing control over her son's life. Apparently she suffered from the same control issues that Adrian did.

  "Is it really necessary?" she asked. "I'm willing to work with you and I thought I'd proved it this past week."

  "A verbal agreement isn't good enough. What if you met another guy and changed your mind? Moved to the other side of the country?"

  She smiled at his concerns. Although she'd never admit it, no other man would ever compare to Adrian. "I won't."

  He raised an eyebrow, as if unconvinced. "You also have Jeremy to consider. What if the unthinkable happened to you? What if you landed in the hospital, were in a car accident or became a victim, like our Jane Doe? Who would look after Jeremy? The bigger question is, who would know to contact me?"

  As tempted as she was to play the odds that nothing untoward would ever happen, if the worst-case scenario did unfold, Jeremy would suffer the trauma of being left in limbo. She'd already considered that herself when their Jane Doe had walked through the ED doors.

  "Do you have a will naming Jeremy's guardian?" he asked.

  "No."

  "Who's listed as next of kin on your medical and employment records?"

  She'd been so determined to wipe all traces of Adrian out of her life that she'd left those spaces blank. An omission she'd already recognized but hadn't taken time to correct. "No one."

  He paused. "You didn't list me as the father on his birth certificate either, did you?"

  She'd completed the application form by printing "Unknown" in that particular blank. At the time she'd been intent on forgetting Adrian existed, although without him, Jeremy would never have been born.

  "I refuse to feel guilty about my decision," she said stiffly. "You didn't want to be a part of my life, remember? Why would I mention you under those circumstances?"

  He hesitated, as if carefully choosing his words. "The real question is, what do you want to do now?"

  She had to give him credit for asking even though the determined lines on his face indicated he would take matters into his own hands if she didn't voluntarily acknowledge his rightful access to Jeremy.

  "I'll make the changes you'd mentioned."

  "And the legal issue? Modifying his birth certificate?"

  Telling herself everything would work out, that she didn't have anything to fear, she nodded. "I'll take care of it."

  "When?"

  "Soon."

  He frowned, eyes narrowed. "When?" he repeated, clearly impatient.

  "Soon," she emphasized, already wondering how she would squeeze attorney's fees out of her too-tight budget. "Although, as I recall, you said we had several months before we had to address the legalities."

  "The legal system grinds slowly; nothing happens overnight. The sooner we start the process the sooner Jeremy will be protected in a worst-case scenario."

  Although he was right, it grated to hear him point out the obvious. "Fine. I will."

  Adrian shifted positions to face her. "You know," he said, offhandedly, "there is another option."

  "Another option?"

  "We could get married."

  Married! Her breath immediately caught in her throat. They were the words she'd heard in her dreams when Adrian swooped in to admit he'd always loved her and would take her away from all this à la Cinderella, but fairy-tales only existed in books and reality wasn't filled with emotional warm fuzzies. Her flash of excitement died as his sentence hung in the air like smog.

  Sabrina felt his gaze as he waited for her reaction. Unfortunately, she didn't know if she was happy, sad, or just plain surprised, but the longer she thought about it, the more bitter-sweet his offer became.

  She stared at him, trying to read his body language for a clue as to if he was simply trying to create a joke to lighten the mood or if he meant what he'd said. His steady and unflinching gaze indicated the latter and the prospect unnerved her. Surely she'd misread him. "Are you serious?"

  "Very."

  Sabrina couldn't think of an appropriate answer. "I don't know what to say."

  "Say yes."

  As if she could. "Is this a spur-of-the-moment suggestion, or—?"

  "I've thought about this all day," he admitted. "Marriage would solve a lot of issues."

  She wondered if he realized that suggesting marriage as a solution wasn't the way to win a girl's heart. Then again, he didn't want her heart. He wanted his son.

  "Marriage would also create others," she pointed out. "You can still be the father Jeremy needs without having that particular piece of paper."

  "We're going to have one piece of paper or another," he said firmly. "You can choose between a marriage certificate or a custody decree. The certificate would be a lot easier to obtain and we wouldn't have the third-party court system looking over our shoulders to ensure we obey the letter of the law as far as visitation schedules and child-support payments went."

  He was a private man, so she understood why he hated the idea of dragging his personal affairs before judges and lawyers. "That's what prompted your idea? You're looking for an easy fix?"

  He started to speak, then stopped, as if he'd realized how close he was to stepping into something nasty. "I want what's best for Jeremy," he said. "If there's a simple way to accomplish that, why not take advantage of it?"

  "Because 'easy' isn't the same as 'best'."

  "Jeremy needs us."

  "And we'll be there for him," she said. "We don't have to live together to accomplish that objective."

  "Do you really want to put Jeremy in a position where he has to explain why his parents aren't married?"

  "We're talking about our relationship, Adrian. You say this is what Jeremy needs, but…but I can't marry someone who thinks of me as an obligation or a means to an end."

  "I don't," he insisted.

  She wasn't convinced. "Are you sure?"

  "Hell, yes! Have you already forgotten what we've been doing on this sofa? That didn't feel like an obligation to me and from your moans, I'd say it didn't feel like that to you either."

  He would have to remind her of her uninhibited response. "We had great times in bed before, too, but those weren't enough to hold us together, were they? What we had was just sex."

  "Just…?" He ran his hand through his hair until a few str
ands had spiked. "You're accusing me of having casual sex?"

  "No, but—"

  "Or could it be you think I'm the sort who'd sleep with a woman in order to get what I want?"

  She spoke without thinking. "I think you're willing to do whatever is necessary to achieve your goal." As soon as she heard herself, she realized she'd crossed the line.

  As expected, his response was immediate. His nostrils flared, his eyes burned with anger, and his tone grew quiet—all warning signs of his temper erupting with hurricane-force fury. "Trust me, Sabrina, if I only wanted my son, I would have hauled you into court faster than you can blink. I certainly wouldn't have bothered to break in the sofa."

  For a long, painful moment, she didn't answer. Even with Jeremy shaking his rattle and jabbering to himself, the silence between them was deafening. "Tell me this," she said quietly, "if Jeremy hadn't been born and everything else was equal, would you be asking me to marry you?" She raised an eyebrow.

  The anger faded from his eyes and puzzlement replaced it. He started to speak, then stopped as if to weigh his words. "Probably not, but…"

  Her head had warned her to expect this particular response but her heart had encouraged her to think positively. Now he'd confirmed what she'd believed—if not for Jeremy, they'd simply be two people who shared a past—and the ember of hope residing in her chest winked out, leaving a smoky trail of disappointment behind.

  This wasn't the first time she'd been rejected in life, she consoled herself. Neither was it the first time Adrian had rejected her. If she hadn't wanted the truth, she should have kept her thoughts and her questions to herself.

  Her gaze didn't waver as she nodded. "That's what I thought."

  "Let me finish. No, marriage wasn't on my mind when I came here because all I could think about was finding an opportunity to talk to you. I didn't allow myself to plan after that because everything hinged on how you reacted and if you forgave me. Between the golf-ball incident and finding out about Jeremy, I moved into fast forward."

  "Now you can return to normal speed," she said crisply. "It's commendable of you to sacrifice your future with a woman you love for Jeremy, but it's unnecessary. I don't want to marry you."

  "We could make it work," he insisted.

  "It's nice of you to want to try," she said politely, aware that he'd missed the perfect opportunity to tell her that she was the woman he loved. Because he didn't, she knew she'd made the right decision. "We're both saving ourselves a lot of grief."

  "We'd be good together," he insisted. "We proved that tonight, right here on this very sofa."

  But do you love me? She wanted to ask outright, but she'd learned her lesson—don't ask questions if you don't want the truth.

  "We generate a lot of sparks," she agreed, "but what happens when the sparks burn out? A commitment should be based on more than parenthood because we certainly don't need to live together or share wedding rings for you to assume a father's role. Besides, we've only been talking to each other for a week after a year's worth of hard feelings. We'd be foolish to rush into a situation we'd later regret."

  He leaned forward. "I care about you, Sabrina. I really do. Maybe I did move faster than I should have, but I won't rescind my proposal. Just think about it. OK?"

  Caring was nice, but she cared about Clay as well as a host of other people from colleagues and staff to patients. It didn't mean she should marry them.

  "We'll see," she said, aware she hadn't technically agreed to weigh his offer. She had to hear three magical words before she'd alter her decision. Only time would tell if he'd say them.

  CHAPTER EIGHT

  AFTER the conversation that hadn't gone as well as Adrian had hoped, he hated to leave. Once the door closed behind him, she wouldn't waste a minute of her time considering the possibilities. Knowing how devoted she was to Jeremy, he'd hoped the what's-best-for-Jeremy argument would carry more weight than if he'd professed how much he wanted her for himself. His strategy clearly hadn't netted the instant results he'd wanted.

  Although he hadn't planned to make love with Sabrina before asking her to marry him, the timing had seemed perfect. Obviously she'd decided that he'd only been scratching an itch.

  He didn't blame her for being wary. It was far-fetched to believe a man who'd disappeared from her life a year ago would have suddenly and miraculously had an epiphany after being reunited for a week. Perhaps when she calmed down and reflected on their conversation—that he didn't have to sleep with her to gain access to his son—she'd take his proposal more seriously.

  He hadn't realized it before, but he'd plainly poked the bruises of her self-esteem issues and had to wait for the pain to fade. Meanwhile, he'd insert himself into every aspect of her life and slowly chip away at her defenses.

  As luck would have it, Jeremy helped matters along when he woke up inconsolable a few minutes later. Adrian couldn't leave.

  Sabrina touched his forehead. "He feels warm. I wonder if he's teething again." The baby tugged at his ear and bellowed.

  "Or he has an earache," Adrian offered.

  Jeremy immediately held out his chubby little arms to Adrian and leaned out of Sabrina's hold with large tears clinging to his eyelashes.

  "You'd better take him," Sabrina said. "It's obvious he wants you."

  As soon as she'd handed him the baby, Adrian sat in the recliner and waited for Sabrina to return with a cold gel-filled plastic ring designed to soothe sore little gums. Jeremy greedily gnawed on it like a dog with its favorite bone.

  "I hope you have more where this one came from," he said lightly.

  "In the freezer. Would you like me to take him now?"

  "I don't mind holding him. He's starting to settle down so the less jostling the better, don't you think?"

  "Yes, but it's getting late and you—"

  "I'm fine right here," he said.

  "But you have to go to work in the morning."

  "So do you."

  "I can handle him by myself."

  For some reason, Sabrina seemed determined to prove herself and he was tired of her believing he was always looking to find fault with her parenting skills. Would they never get past that?

  "I know you can, but why should you when we can share the load?" he asked calmly. "This way we both get some sleep."

  She hesitated and he tried harder. "How about this? I'll stick around to take the first shift and you can take the second."

  "OK," she finally said. "Wake me when it's my turn."

  In the end, he didn't have to. By one a.m., Jeremy's pain had subsided enough for him to sleep, and although there was plenty of time for Adrian to drive to his apartment and catch a few winks in a comfortable bed, he didn't. With his clothes still in the car from his excursion to the dry cleaner's earlier in the day, his toothbrush and electric razor still in Sabrina's bathroom from the weekend, he had everything he possibly needed within reach.

  Other than a bed, of course. Not wanting to risk upsetting Sabrina if she found him lying next to her, he grabbed an extra pillow and stretched out on the sofa.

  Amazingly enough, Sabrina didn't seem surprised to find him there the next morning when she walked through on her way to the kitchen for Jeremy's bottle. She'd simply said, "The bathroom is free for the next fifteen minutes."

  Even more amazing was how the next evening was a repeat of the one before.

  "Why is it that his teeth only bother him at night?" Sabrina muttered at eleven o'clock as she paced the floor with Jeremy in her arms.

  "It could be worse," Adrian said as he took a few minutes to flip through the twenty-four-hour television news channels to catch up on any world or national events he'd missed.

  "How?"

  "He could be fussy from the time we get home, but he waits until after we've had a nice, relaxing evening, a walk around the block or through the park, and a fun-filled swim in the sink."

  Call him a masochist, but he was quite happy with Jeremy's schedule and if he didn't know better,
he'd think the baby had planned it this way. Adrian was now spending the night without resistance, his clothes hung in Sabrina's closet rather than in his car, his underwear and socks were tucked in the bottom dresser drawer, and his shoes shared floor space with her tennis shoes, sandals, and high heels.

  The only thing that would make him happier would be if the ring he'd purchased today was displayed on her finger rather than buried inside the outer pocket of his suitcase which he'd stored under her bed.

  Actually, there was another thing that would make him happy, too—if he didn't sleep alone.

  Even so, he wasn't complaining. With luck, Sabrina would realize just how handy he was to have around and his worries would be over.

  He clicked off the TV with the remote control. "Do you want me to take him for a while?"

  "Thanks, but it's my turn for the first shift," she said. "You can sack out on my bed because you won't get any sleep if you stay out here."

  "Are you sure?"

  "Yeah. I didn't change the sheets, though, so if you want fresh linen, you can strip the bed yourself."

  She shouldn't have used the word "strip" because it evoked all sorts of pleasant images. Knowing he'd also be surrounded by her scent as he lay on her pillows, he doubted if he'd sleep at all. If he did, he'd have the most erotic dreams of his entire life. "It's fine the way it is," he said instead. "Goodnight."

  "Goodnight. Oh, I forgot to ask. Did you ever get in touch with Clay?"

  "I left a voice message. I'm sure he'll call me tomorrow."

  They had an unwritten rule of touching base with each other every few days, especially after Clay had moved into his own apartment. Clay had balked at first, but after Adrian had appeared unexpectedly on his doorstep during a most inopportune time when Clay was "entertaining" a pretty young woman, he'd agreed.

  "OK. Goodnight."

  He sank onto her bed and, as he'd imagined, his keen sense of smell detected Sabrina's trademark gingery citrus scent in the room. This could have been his for the last year if he hadn't screwed things up—if he hadn't felt so guilty over Clay's accident and been so determined to pay for his sins alone. In the end, Sabrina had paid for them, too.