Our Forever Promise

by Mary Wasowski

  He took a sip of his Bourbon and continued, “Look, I’m not deluded into thinking we will ever be friends, but sooner or later we will have to find the middle ground here. Riley and Jackson are as real as it gets. We will be connected through them.”

  “As for Reese,” Walker went on, “I love her Samuel. I never stopped. Hate me for the rest of your life if that’s what you need to do, but please don’t take it out on Jackson. You may not have been able to save our child all those years ago, but you can save my son now.”

  “Stop talking, please. I can’t hear this anymore. I’ll do the surgery. I’ll do it because it’s the best course of treatment for my patient, and it will eradicate the AVM.”

  “Thank you, Samuel.”

  “It’s for him, not you.”

  “I know that, but it doesn’t mean I’m any less grateful.”

  There you have it, I thought as I watched Walker Reed walk out of my office. Deep down I always knew I would say yes, and to hell with the drama that surrounded us. I am a doctor first. I always have been. I can think of no other thing in my life that drives me to the precipice of satisfaction. I knew I was taking a risk to agreeing to operate on Jackson. If anything were to go wrong with his surgery, how would I ever be able to look my daughter in the eyes again? I had to stow away those fears, and put the needs of my patient first. Keep the personal feelings out of it.

  I left everything where it was on my desk and called my driver to take me home. I needed a shower and some sleep to clear my head. This day was like nothing I expected it to be, but it has already changed my life.

  Riley thinks I’m a rock star, but I’m not. I am a doctor. I have a gift, an extraordinary one. I went into medicine with the sole purpose to heal. My strong determination drives me in my commitment to take on the most impossible cases and give my patients possibility and hope. As I walked by Jackson’s room, he was sleeping soundly. I smiled and shook my head. There she was…my daughter curled up beside him, as if my staff could keep her away.

  The sight of Jackson and Riley wrapped around each other made my heart ache. They were so young, and their future was filled with promise. I never had what they have. Reese never looked at me the way Riley looks at Jackson. Love was shining in her eyes, and he was all she saw.

  I silently promised her that I would do everything in my power to make this right, no matter how much it cost me personally.

  STRUGGLING AGAINST MY want to stay close to Jackson and my need to be with Reese was consuming me.

  This day had been a blinding blur. I had no concept of time. I felt numb from it all. After receiving the one call I always feared may happen, I felt at that moment that all I valued in my life could be lost. One call had the ability to bring me to my knees and make me succumb to my fear, a fear I showed no one, until today.

  Jackson was in the hospital, every parent’s worst nightmare come true. No matter what safeguards I had in place for my son, they could not protect him from the unknown: the silent killer that was now in his brain.

  I could question “Why” all day long. It wouldn’t change a damn thing. The answer would still be the same. I could lose my son the same way I lost his mother. I had never prayed so hard in all of my life than today. I threw myself at God’s mercy.

  Do I deserve my prayers answered?

  My list of sins was long. I’d made my share of mistakes. I’d been uncompromising and unforgiving of others. My father was cold and remorseless. In our world, he knew no other way. His decisions later had cost him more than he ever realized.

  Phillip outlined his sins in great detail in his last letters written to me, words from the grave he couldn’t say to me in person. Maybe he could have if I had given him the chance. I wasn’t fair to him. I should have listened but allowed my buried grief for Elizabeth and thoughts of Reese to consume me. Those feelings made me cold. I was catapulted back to a dark place where no light was in sight. I was drowning…again.

  In hindsight, he was too. From the moment he decided to put his plan in motion to change the course of my life, his true hell began. To be under Townsend’s control must have slowly destroyed my father.

  A man like Phillip Reed did not follow…he led with no regrets. He taught me that, and he showed me that life lesson every single day while he was alive.

  I can’t be like him.

  I have to be better than him.

  I have to fight against my anger for him and truly forgive my father. But how?

  I vowed never to forgive him for all the pain he caused me and Reese. He doesn’t deserve it and neither does Henry.

  Wise souls like Lila Mitchell, who believe in forgiveness would tell me this: “Forgive them for you and not for them. Free yourself of the ones that hurt you most. Break free of your past, a past you have no power to change. Free yourself of the binds that twist in your soul and break them once and for all. Be strong and have faith.” If only…

  As I stood in that darkened hallway with little light around me, I stared through the window, watching my son. I saw one thing perfectly clear. He slept soundly with Riley’s arms wrapped tightly around him. They were each other’s lifeline.

  I know who I am. I am Walker Phillip Reed, a man who is unforgiving of his enemies. But can I truly change? Will true forgiveness help me, help my son? Damn if I knew. I’m too tired to even try to figure it all out tonight.

  “Sir, are you ready?”

  I blinked and realized Richard was standing in front of me.

  “Sir?” he asked again.

  “I’m ready.”

  Two words that could change me completely, two words that I need to say to the one person who desperately needs to hear it. Looking back once more to my son, I have to try for Jackson. No matter what it costs me.

  We made our way through the private parking garage of Samuel’s wing. I slid into the backseat of my waiting car. I probably could have crashed into a deep sleep if I allowed my brain to shut down. Emotionally exhausted and physically beaten down with all that happened here today, I needed the one person who could help me fight my demons. I needed my angel…Reese.

  “Has Stephen arrived yet?” I asked Richard through the divider.

  “Yes, sir. He’s with Ms. Mitchell back at the hotel.”

  “Take me to Reese. I need her.”

  As I voiced out loud my vulnerabilities where Richard could hear them, I just didn’t care. I needed my half—my better half—to heal me.

  I phoned Stephen, and he had already been given a status update by Richard on today’s events. I knew that once I cleared my head, I would have to phone my mother, check in with my office, and call the one person I never thought I would have to speak with again: Henry Townsend, Jackson’s only living grandfather. My son would want him and his grandmothers to know. Maybe I can have Jenny place the calls. I can’t think of that now. I’ll decide tomorrow. Hell, it is tomorrow. It’s way past two in the morning.

  I made my way through our suite. Reese was sleeping and looking beautiful in her dream-like state. I stripped myself bare and let the hot water scold my skin, washing away the hurt I was feeling. I was lost in my thoughts when the shower door suddenly opened, letting the cool air in, along with a hot body. My eyes roamed over Reese’s gloriously naked self. I was hungry for her and wanted nothing more than to lose myself in her, madly take her up against the shower walls and make her scream my name. I wasn’t in the right frame of mind and wouldn’t risk hurting her.

  The way her eyes were piercing mine, I knew I could easily do anything I wanted at that moment, and Reese would easily submit and lose herself too. While the water showered down on her body, I also saw a few tears. Please God, I could take no more tears today.

  I wiped them away and more fell. My mouth closed over Reese’s very plump and inviting lips. She hesitated at first and then granted me access to her warm mouth. Sliding my tongue with hers, my dick stood at full mast. She turned away from me and placed her hands up against the wall with mine covering hers.


  “Take me, Walker. Take what’s yours. Heal yourself. Heal me. I love you, Walker. I need you inside of me…now. I just need… You.”

  One touch from Reese, and she has the power to completely bring me down to my knees. I wanted her in my bed and with me above her.

  I was raging against the battles in my head. Only Reese can calm me. I was weary, but alive with carnal desire and pure want for her. She was waiting for me to touch her, as I continued to struggle against my control.

  Closing my eyes and still holding her, I whispered, “Not here. I don’t trust myself.”

  Kissing the top of her shoulder, as I glided my hands up her arms and turned her around to face me, I said, “You are the only one that I allow to see me. You have all the power here. You have it all, Reese. What do you want from me?”

  She wrapped her arms around my neck, inching closer and closer to me. Placing gentle kisses along my neck and a soft bite to my earlobe, she whispered, “Do you really have to ask?”

  “Yes,” I replied.

  “I need to hear it. More than you ever know.”

  She was driving me insane with her teasing. Biting her lower lip and tempting me with her gorgeous body, her curves were defined. Her swelled breasts were calling out to me like a siren’s cry. Her nipples were hard. My desire for my woman was overflowing. The smell of her arousal was chipping away at what was left of my self-control.

  She again whispered in her sexy silky voice.

  “You. Walker. Just you. Now take me to bed and make love to me. I. Need. You.”

  I COULD TELL by Walker’s body language, he was struggling. I needed to lead him where his heart and mind wanted to go. He wouldn’t say the words out loud, but I knew he was giving me the control to show him the way.

  Our eyes were locked on with one another. He never looked away. Taking his hand in mine, I turned and exited the shower with Walker following. I reached for a towel to dry him, but he stopped me and took the towel from me. With no words spoken yet, he began gliding the towel up and down my body until I was dry, ignoring his own body to take care of me.

  It was my turn to help him. I took my time with this simple act. Beads of water still remained on his skin, as I worked my way over and over his glorious body. He shuddered at my touch. I knew my teasing was affecting him. Stroke after stroke, I worked up and down his body until he was completely dried, but I purposely ignored his chest. This would send him over the edge. I lapped up the few droplets of water that remained around the flat disks of his nipples, biting down just a bit to awaken my man’s desires. He let out a feral growl, and I knew what would come next.

  I COULD TAKE no more.

  “Enough,” I shouted out.

  Her eyes brightened. Reese knew exactly what she was doing to me, and now it was time to show her.

  I carried her over to the bed and gently placed her down. She had been sick today. I knew I had to be careful with her, but Reese was beyond tempting. She began caressing her golden skin with her hands slowing reaching her entrance. I could take no more as I slowly entered her throbbing sex with my tongue.

  She let me hear her, and with no restraint. Her cries of pleasure continued to ignite my desire for my woman. Reese was beyond excited. She was soaked with arousal. Her juices were intoxicating, and I wanted more. Two fingers separated her pink folds. I made my way deeper and deeper inside of her. Her sex tightened around my fingers, as her orgasm rocked her body. Her body was trembling, I wasn’t done yet. I took a breath before entering her again with my tongue lapping up all of her juices. I flicked her clitoris one more time, causing Reese to completely shatter around me. Screams of satisfied pleasure resonated throughout our suite. We were slicked with sweat. I could taste her all night with no end in sight. God! She was beyond captivating. Reese was all I wanted.

  I broke free of her embrace. My animalistic need for her was completely decimating me.

  “Walker, Please. Why are you pulling away from me?” Her dejected eyes were piercing me like a knife.

  “I don’t want to lose control and hurt you. Baby, you were sick today and dehydrated. I was neglectful of your needs as well as the needs of our baby. You will never know how sorry I am for not being there for you both today.”

  “What? Oh Walker, you are breaking my heart,” she whispered. Her words just broke me. I went to move, and she reached for me.

  “You didn’t neglect me or our child. Your child needed you today. Jackson needed you. Don’t you ever apologize for you being a father. And as for hurting me? Look at me, dammit!”

  She was now on her knees and holding my face in her hands.

  “Look. At. Me. I. Love. You. I. Trust. You. You could never hurt me. Don’t you know by now? You were the one that put me back together again. Now make love to me and make us both…whole again. I need you.”

  Reese was my Aphrodite, my beautiful goddess filled with beauty, raptures of sexual want, and love all for me. I took what was mine, over and over again. I entered her slowly until her fingernails clawed up my spine. She screamed out for me to go faster, harder, deeper. I could feel our bodies reaching the edge of our explosive orgasms. I loved coming with Reese. Our bodies were entwined, slicked in our juices and sweat. I stayed connected to Reese until I had nothing left to spill into her. I couldn’t move. I swear I had to check to make sure she was still breathing. I knew I worked her over harder than I should have, but Reese took all of me with no hesitation.

  Rolling over to my side with Reese in my arms, I whispered. “I love you.” She smiled and returned the three simple words back to me. I watched her drift soundly into sleep. When I knew she was out, I detangled myself from her embrace and walked into the bathroom to get another towel. I gently and quietly cleaned her up and myself before getting back into bed. Her body shifted with her arm reaching out for me, feeling my absence.

  I knew she was wrecked and needed sleep. I did too, but I wanted to watch her, to listen to her breathe, just be close to her. If I had to be addicted to anything, she was my drug. I craved her day and night. How did I ever survive all of those years without her in my life? It didn’t matter. I couldn’t revisit those thoughts. We promised each other we wouldn’t do that anymore. I had her now where she belonged…in my arms…. forever.

  What felt like feathers against my skin was Reese’s long hair tickling and brushing up along my face. I opened my eyes to see her staring back at me. Tucking her long locks behind her ears, she kissed me and smiled. A perfect way to start what I knew would be a tough day.

  “Good morning, beautiful,” I greeted her.

  I pulled Reese down to me, giving her a proper kiss.

  Breathless, she whispered, “Good morning to you. Did you manage to get any sleep?”

  “A couple of hours. Don’t worry about me, baby. I can manage with less sleep than you can. You are the one that I’m worried about. All of this stress is not good for you or the baby.”

  “Walker, how many times do I have to tell you? Yesterday was just a small mishap. I am completely fine and so is your daughter.”

  “Our daughter. I wish you would stop trying to placate me and allow me to take care of you and our child. It’s my job, Reese!”

  “Hey, hey, now where did that come from?”

  “I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m just completely beside myself here. I hate this feeling of helplessness. I can’t help you, I can’t help Jackson.”

  “Walker, I’m going to say this one more time, and you damn well better listen. Pissing off a hormonal pregnant woman is not in your best interest, so heed my warning. Stop with this self-deprecating attitude. You, Walker Reed—all of you—makes me whole. I love you with all of my heart and soul.”

  She grabbed my hands and perfectly placed them where our child was growing. It sent electric pulses throughout my body. Once again, Reese saved me.

  “We love you, Walker. We need you. You. Are. Our. Everything. I love you. I love you. I love you,” she recited over and over again, chipping away
at my very existence. I lived and breathed for Reese.

  “I love you more, so much.”

  “Impossible, but I love hearing you say it.”

  I made love to Reese, as the early morning day light filled our room. She needed me as much as I needed her. I probably could have fallen asleep and remained in bed for the rest of the day with Reese, but I knew we needed to get to the hospital.

  After our lovemaking, I checked my phone and read a text message from Liam, my friend and Jackson’s doctor.

  Liam: Walker, I’m here at Johns Hopkins. It was a horrendous flight with all the delays due to the storm. I’ve only just arrived, so no need to rush. I am currently reviewing all of Jackson’s labs and films. I haven’t met with Dr. Briggs yet or Jackson. Talk with you soon.

  It was only six thirty. I truly was exhausted, but I wouldn’t be telling Reese. She had her eyes closed, but I knew she wasn’t sleeping. I held her as close as I could to me, breathing in her beautiful scent of jasmine flowers and our sex.

  “Reese.” I whispered close to her ear.

  “Hmm?” She smiled, but kept her eyes closed.

  “Can I ask you a question?”

  Shifting in my arms, she answered, “Of course you can, and you know that.”

  “Even the hard questions?”

  “Walker,” she said with a warning, “ask me. Don’t dance around it. Talk to me.” Now she was fully awake and waiting on me to open up to her.

  “I’m sorry I’m being so vague. I don’t mean to be. With everything happening with Jackson, my mind is all over the place. Reese, something has been weighing on my mind, but I guess it really didn’t hit me until now.”

  “Okay, what is it?” she asked.

  Taking a deep breath and bracing myself for whatever reaction Reese would give me, I finally found the courage to ask her my question.

  “Reese, if our son would have lived to be born, would you have told me?”