"Ariel is not used to Ashley," Latoya said before he could answer. "Of course everything is not okay. The poor thing is not used to her mother. So before Brandon starts making excuses for his wife, let me just put that out there."
Brandon sighed and looked at his mother. "Well..."
"No defense?" Latoya chuckled. "Finally Brandon is seeing sense and realizing that Ashley is a user and an unfit mother."
Beatrice cleared her throat. "Latoya, you know better than to speak badly of Ashley." She looked at Brandon solemnly. "What's going on?"
Latoya was looking at him too, her eyes bright with questions. "Yes, Brandy what's going on?"
"I hate it when you call me Brandy," Brandon said, deflecting. He didn't want to have to tell them what happened. He stood up and looked through the window in the back yard where his mother had a birdbath. A lone bird was teetering on the edge of the container.
"Mommy, make him answer." Latoya had a wheedling tone in her voice as if she was ten again and her mother could make Brandon do anything.
Brandon glared at her and then turned to his mother. "Ashley and I are going through a rough patch."
"How rough?" his mother asked, sitting down. Her silver hair cupped her chin and swayed a little when she sat down.
He found himself gazing at it for a while. Some of the strands glinted under the weak evening sunlight that was illuminating the hall. He couldn't tell her what happened. His mother was a fairytale pie-in-the-sky kind of person; giving her the sordid details about finding Ashley in bed with Regina would devastate her.
"I think it's an affair," Latoya said while he gathered his thoughts.
"An affair?" His mother raised an eyebrow. "Good Lord, help us. With who? I don't think Ashley is that crazy to have an affair with somebody else. You just don't understand Ashley, Latoya. That's why you don't like her. Try understanding her a little, will you? Instead of judging her."
"Who is having an affair?" His father came up the stairs from the kitchen, wiping his hands on a cloth.
"Ashley," Latoya said with certainty this time, because Brandon was just standing there, frozen at the window. He was contemplating whether to refute what she said or not. Admitting what happened out loud would make it real. He would be putting it out there, and he was reluctant to do so.
"Oh." His father picked up the sculpture and gave Brandon a sympathetic look. "I am going to rectify this," he said, heading back to the basement. "One arm is too large. The face is good but the body is off kilter a tiny bit."
"But Leonard," Beatrice looked baffled, "you act so unperturbed about what Latoya said. Ashley is not having an affair."
"Well," Leonard shrugged, "it's Ashley. She has always struck me as unsettled, like she wasn't too happy with Brandon. She doesn’t come to church anymore, she hasn't done so for years, and she dresses like a single woman, like she is on the way to some fashion runway, not to mention how she avoids family gatherings like the plague. In my humble, honest opinion, I thought it was obvious that she was hunting around for someone else. Son, get a good lawyer."
"Leonard!" his mother squeaked. "Who said anything about a lawyer?"
"The boy can finally be free." Leonard put down the statue and looked at Brandon unwaveringly. "Ashley has turned him into a house mom. Their relationship is not a partnership. She isn't a helpmeet. She is a parasite. Birds can't fly on one wing.
"The only good thing that has come out of the marriage is Ariel and Alisha. That's my two cents; sorry if it hurts. I have been meaning to say it for a long time now, but you know that I think parents should butt out of their children's relationships unless they are invited to give their opinion."
He dragged his eyes from Brandon's and looked at Beatrice significantly and then nodded and left the room.
Latoya clapped her hands. "Bravo, Dad! Bravo."
"This is not a concert, Latoya! Leonard!"
Beatrice looked at her husband's retreating back and then at Latoya's smirking face.
She then swung around to him, a confused, fearful look in her eyes.
Curiously, his father's statement was a jolt to him. He had thought that he was the only one, besides Latoya, to notice the blatant disregard Ashley had for him.
However, his father had been keenly observing and had not said a thing. His father operated on a need to know basis. He was not the kind of person to interfere in his business but hearing it so starkly spelled out was jolting, to say the least.
"I know a good lawyer," Latoya said, "Richard's cousin, Kenneth. I am sure he can help."
"Now you just wait a minute there," Beatrice piped in. She was agitated and confused. Brandon could see the crease between her brows and the disapproval stamped on her face.
"Lawyers, divorce—what are you going on and on about? So Ashley had an affair. That does not mean automatic dissolution of your marriage. People work these things out all the time. They get back together and they become stronger."
Latoya was shaking her head vigorously. "Ashley is not good for him, Mom. This is not just some frivolous reason for Brandon to leave. He needs to be free of her and meet a good woman. You know how many friends I have who would be perfect for him, who would love him and be a good wife."
"They have children. My grandchildren," Beatrice said sternly. "Children trump feelings, and yes, I believe that if you have them you should stay together until they grow up and pass the worst." Beatrice turned to Brandon. "This man that she is having an affair with—is it a one-time thing or..."
Brandon sighed. He might as well just tell them the truth. He couldn't have his mother thinking that he was the bad guy for wanting to break up his family. He paused for while before delivering the news. "Well, actually she is not having an affair with a guy."
"You see," Beatrice looked at Latoya triumphantly, "and yet you are quick to jump on the divorce bandwagon. Why are people so quick to talk divorce these days? The first threat of a problem, it's divorce. I don't get it, and to make it worse this divorce epidemic is spreading to the church. Every other couple these days starts thinking divorce as soon as a little problem surfaces. It's as if they have forgotten that there are three people in a marriage, the couple and God."
His mother ran out of steam and sat back in a chair.
Latoya looked at him sharply and then gasped. "Oh my word, Mom. Brandon didn't deny that Ashley was having an affair; he just said it wasn't with a guy. It's her friend Regina, isn't it? Good Lord, deliver us from all evil!" Latoya clamped her hand over mouth. "As much as I dislike Ashley, I couldn't...didn't imagine this."
Beatrice was still, really still. "Deny this madness, Brandon. Ashley is not a... a..."
"I can't," Brandon shrugged, "I caught them in my bed last night."
Then he found himself telling them the whole sordid story, after which he felt tired, like all the energy had been drained from him. All the pent-up hurt and anger flared up again and then died down, leaving him weak.
His mother was crying. Latoya was soothing her but his mother was having none of it. She got up and went to her room. She slammed the door on a sob and Brandon sighed.
His sigh was the only sound in the quiet room.
"Where are you staying?" Latoya asked him after a long silence. "Obviously it isn't here."
Brandon told her about his encounter with Tara and the offer of the apartment from Nadine.
Latoya widened her eyes. "Nadine Langley? Wow! How is she in person?"
"She's pretty and really kind and easy to talk to." Brandon smiled weakly. "I am supposed to be having dinner with her tonight. I am not in the mood, though. I probably should just do the shopping and crash."
"You mean lie in the dark and curse yourself for marrying Ashley? Maybe you shouldn't be alone now." Latoya came to sit beside him and took his hand. "I'll have the flat cleaned out tomorrow and furnished properly."
"No." Brandon squeezed her fingers. "I need some time to grieve by myself." He stood up.
"You must have seen this com
ing, or some variation of it," Latoya murmured. "This shouldn't be so devastating; you knew that Ashley wasn't all there in the marriage."
"That I knew but it still hurts like hell. There was always hope, at least on my part, that one day things would get better. That's me, the stupid optimist." Brandon cringed when images of Ashley and Regina in his bed came to his mind. "But not for one moment did I see this coming. I must be dumb. If I couldn't see Ashley for what she was I don't think my judgment is all that good, is it?"
*****
Brandon didn't even stop to get something to eat. He headed straight to the apartment and sank into a living room settee and didn’t bother turning on the lights, nor did he answer his phone, though it rang several times. He couldn't rouse himself from his stupor to even attempt to do so. He knew he should call Nadine and cancel but physically he felt incapable of lifting the phone. It was as if he was having a delayed reaction to last night’s events.
On the drive from his parent’s house he had started thinking about what had happened and then the thought hit him how utterly emasculated he felt. Maybe Ashley hadn't even liked him to touch her. All this time he had thought that even though their relationship was heading down the toilet they were at least compatible sexually. That was the one thing that he could count on, even if they were having bad days.
He never had to beg for sex like some husbands claimed that they had to. That was the one part of his relationship that was functioning and healthy. Ashley was always willing and eager to share her body with him, even if the sex act had lost all intimacy and meaning for him lately. Was that all an act too on her part; had she made love to him and thought of Regina?
He squeezed his eyes shut and waited out the pain that gripped his chest. He must have dozed off, when there was a knocking on his door. He looked at his watch and groaned. It was way past seven o’clock. He looked through the peephole and saw that it was Nadine standing at the doorstep with a concerned look on her face.
He opened the door and leaned on it. "Sorry I couldn't make it to dinner. My situation just began to sink in and I..."
"No, don't apologize," Nadine said. "I think I kind of get it. I bought you groceries."
Brandon sighed and moved away from the door. "Come on in. I didn't want to put you through any trouble."
"You aren't." Nadine walked past him with two bags. "I brought dinner. I hope you like vegetarian."
He sniffed her perfume. Inexplicably, it made him feel calmer. He tried to capture the scent long after she headed to the kitchen.
He walked behind her. "I am really not particularly hungry and I do like vegetarian once it's not fake meat. Why would vegetarians want to fake the very thing that they changed their lifestyle to avoid?"
She looked at him and laughed. "That's a good point."
"Seriously," Brandon grimaced, "why eat mock chicken or mock fish or mock bacon or whatever? Why not eat the real thing? I hate fakery."
She came closer to him, putting a box of orange juice and eggs in the fridge.
"I hate fakery too. I am not a vegetarian, though. I just brought what Lily cooked for dinner. She always cooks vegetarian on a Wednesday."
"Yes," Brandon inhaled her scent. "You smell so good." He opened his eyes again and looked at her. "Your perfume is amazing."
Nadine smiled at him slowly. "Thank you. I made it myself."
"You made it?" Brandon watched as she portioned out the food that was in one container and handed him a plate.
"Let's go eat and I'll tell you all about my secret hobby." Nadine followed him over to the round glass table in the living room and sat across from him.
"At least this is not fake," Brandon remarked after inspecting the food before tasting it, "and it tastes good too."
Nadine smiled. "Thanks to Lily; she is the best cook. I have nightmares about her leaving my employ."
"So tell me about your perfume making." Brandon looked at her while she had her head down. She had her hair slicked back, little curls at her hairline refusing to be tamed. He could see her perfectly formed shell ears. She didn't have on any makeup, and her face looked smooth as cocoa butter except for a mole above her lip.
She looked up at him; her eyes were a light brown. She blinked and they seemed to get darker. He found her fascinating. In the years since he had married Ashley he had not felt this kind of pull toward anyone.
He watched as she licked her lips. His body tightened in pure unadulterated sexual attraction. He was not functioning right. His wife had cheated, his marriage was all but over, and Nadine was being nice to him. That's why he was acting like this. Anybody he spoke to now he would probably find attractive; it just so happened to be Nadine—at least that was what he was telling himself.
Nadine interrupted his thoughts. "One year we were touring Germany and I caught a cold. I bought a small sample of essential oils from a lady who claimed that they would set me right and they did. They really did. " Nadine laughed sweetly. The sound surrounded him and soothed him, like her perfume.
Brandon watched her and thought about the last time he had a conversation with a female who laughed with him, talked to him and did not snarl cagily at the least little provocation. He was liking this.
"So you got interested in oils?" he prompted.
"Yes, and then I realized that some of them smelled really good and they had certain effects on the senses. Like the perfume I am wearing now is a mixture of Lavender, Clary Sage, Geranium, Patchouli, Rose Bulgarian, Sweet Orange, Ylang Ylang and Chamomile. It's nice, isn't it?"
"Very, though I don't recognize a few of those plants." Brandon cleaned his plate and then sat back and watched as Nadine finished her food.
"You must have had an interesting childhood," he said easily.
Nadine nodded. "Yes, I did. I spent most of my time with my grandparents on both sides of the family, and I was Gramps' protégée. We traveled a lot. That kind of experience was good for my career."
"I remember reading about that," Brandon said. "You are a musical genius."
Nadine flushed. "Not a genius exactly. I was just exposed to the right things and pursued it with a single-minded determination for years. I have an ear for sound."
"Modest, pretty, talented and kind," Brandon said softly. He leaned forward in his chair, getting one more whiff of her perfume. "Want us to go on the patio to watch the stars?"
"Sure," Nadine said, getting up. Her hands were trembling a little from his compliments. She hoped that he couldn't see that they were shaking. She was severely attracted to Brandon. It wasn't a fluke. She thought it had been a flash in the pan kind of feeling or maybe it was an intense crush she had on him. She had had several of those when she was a teenager, but that sort of feeling usually died quickly and painlessly.
She picked up the plates and he got up to go to the patio. She was an adult now. This was not merely a crush.
I like you! she wanted to blurt out to Brandon. I know you are hurting about a breakup and I know that this is lousy timing and I know that I have no business being here, but I like you.
She didn't say it though. It was too soon to be telling a guy stuff like that, too soon to even be sure that she really liked him. She inhaled deeply before joining him.
They sat on the lounge chairs. Brandon looked up at the starry sky.
"Thank you for being here, Nadine," Brandon said in the quietness. "It has been a rough two days."
"You are welcome," Nadine said softly. They sat and stared at nothing for the longest while, until Nadine told him she had to go.
Brandon looked at her in the half-light, his eyes heavy. "Want to do something tomorrow?"
"Sure," Nadine nodded vigorously. "I have tickets to a play at the Little Theatre. It's starring Oliver Samuels. The clips on television look hilarious."
"That would be nice," Brandon said. "I need a good laugh."
*****
Brandon woke up at exactly five-thirty the next morning, and it took him a while to realize that he was no
t in his king-sized bed at home. He felt around in the bed. There was no Ashley gently snoring beside him; no sound of the barking dog next door; no rustling of leaves from the tree that was too close to the house that he didn't have the heart to cut down.
There was only the sound of silence and then the low thrumming pain when he remembered where he was and why.
He glanced at his watch. He didn't have to tip-toe to the girls’ room to wake them up.
He didn't have to do anything. He was a single man without a family. The thought made him feel bereft and lonely. He loved being there for his girls.
He pulled himself out of bed and got ready. He was running out of clothes. He needed to get more clothes; that meant that he had to face Ashley. He didn't think he was ready for that but he had to go to the house, and maybe in the process get his daughters ready for school.
Thankfully, traffic was almost nonexistent this early in the morning. He looked at his watch when he drove up his driveway; it took him fifteen minutes to make it across town. It was almost six o'clock. There was no yellow car in his driveway. He swallowed the bile when he thought of it. He didn't know if he would ever drive up in his own driveway again and not think about Regina's car parked before the garage.
He let himself into the house and tiptoed upstairs. He pushed the master bedroom open and saw that Ashley was asleep, her silk sleep mask over her eyes. He went to the children's room and woke up Alisha first.
"Daddy!" She opened her eyes slowly and then jumped up. She hugged him, her little arms encircling his back. "Mommy said you would be away for a while. You never told us. You can't just go away and not tell us," she lectured him sternly.
Brandon closed his eyes and squeezed her to him. No he couldn't just go away and not tell her.
He inhaled. "Go get ready for school; we’ll talk downstairs."
She looked at him searchingly. Her big brown eyes had so many questions. She got up, reluctance shouting from every sinew in her body.
Ariel woke up by herself when she heard his voice and held onto him for dear life when he bent to pick her up.
On the Rebound Page 6
