“Jax! Don’t ever wander off like that again,” he said, wrapping him in his arms.
“I didn’t mean to,” Jax said, his eyes glistening and face scrunching up. He sobbed into his dad’s shoulder. “I—I—I woke up and wanted to—to find a tree, like Miss Lia said, so we could get more gingerbread men to hang on it from her mommy…but then Storm got out when I opened the door and I promised that I wouldn’t let him outside. And then I couldn’t remember which way to go.” He buried his face again and his little shoulders shook.
“It’s okay, Jax. All that matters is that you’re alright. Storm stayed with you and kept you warm, huh? Now that’s a real friend,” she added, rubbing Jax’s back as Quinn held him. She scooped up Storm. Jax sniffed and reached out to hug the cat.
Quinn stood up without making eye contact with her.
“A real friend?” Quinn asked Lia as he brushed snow off of Jax’s rear. How could she say that at a time like this? “That cat is the reason Jax got lost. The cat getting out of the cabin should never have been as important as my kid’s safety.”
“I never meant for it to be,” Lia said, her eyes widening. “Quinn, I only told him about keeping Storm inside once. I couldn’t have known Jax would go after him if he got loose.”
“I’m sorry,” Jax cried.
Lia pressed her fingers to her mouth. This wasn’t the time or place to argue. Everyone was upset. Quinn didn’t want Jax anymore upset than he already was. It wasn’t his fault. And a child disappearing was any parent’s worst nightmare.
“You two ride back. I’ll carry Storm and get there soon,” Lia said. Quinn didn’t argue. He carried Jax over to the snowmobile and took off, leaving Lia behind.
~*~
A can of warm alphabet soup and cup of hot chocolate and Jax was back to normal. He sat at the coffee table coloring some pages Lia had printed off her computer before heading to the cabin. Quinn, on the other hand, had barely spoken to her. Jax missing had roiled up all Quinn’s fears about losing him. She couldn’t blame him. There was nothing like a parent’s worry for their children. She didn’t need to be a mother to feel the terror she knew had surged through Quinn. She’d never been so afraid in her life. She loved Jax. God help her, she loved Quinn too, but she sensed him slipping away.
She joined him outside as he worked off his steam by building a small overhang on the back of the cabin. It was a project he insisted on doing, in between birdhouses, so that she’d have a place to park the snowmobile without it getting buried during storms.
“Quinn, Jax wants you to come in and see a page he colored. I wouldn’t bother you, but I think he needs reassurance and wants to see you,” Lia said.
“I’m almost done here,” he said. She knew he wasn’t only referring to the portico. He was nearly finished with any repairs that could be tackled during the winter. Apart from making birdhouses and working on the dollhouse version of Esther’s B&B that she’d custom ordered, he had no reason to stay. The trade-off arrangement they had had been fulfilled.
“Well, you know how home ownership is. The work’s never really done, is it?” she teased, though deep down she was being serious. He pressed his lips together in a half-smile.
Deputy Vale’s SUV rumbled down the path from the main farm. He honked once, before he noticed them heading over. He got out as they approached.
“What’s up?” Lia asked.
“Just some messages for Quinn.” The deputy handed over an envelope. “This had your name on it, Quinn, but was addressed to the town. The other message is from a lady with the sense to walk in four-inch heels around patchy ice. Platinum blonde hair. Says she’s your ex-wife. No offense, but she kinda looks like one of those plastic figurines at Tiny Tim’s Toys.”
Quinn lowered the envelope and narrowed his eyes. Sweat beaded on his forehead and Lia knew it wasn’t from the work he’d been doing. His hands fisted.
“I know what she wants, but how did she find me?” he said.
“Several people in town posted pictures of your birdhouse gifts on their websites and social media. There was even a photo of you on one of them. Their intention was to help your sales. Apparently, your work has gone viral. There’s only one Christmas Town. My guess is that made finding you pretty easy.”
Lia lowered her chin and couldn’t bring herself to look at Quinn. The tension in the air was enough to kill. She’d tried to help. Instead, she’d brought his worst enemy straight to him.
“I’m so sorry,” she said, reaching out to touch him.
“Don’t,” he said. “I listened to you. You convinced me this place was safe and that everything would be okay. I warned you this would happen. I don’t want Elena to see Jax. I need you guys to watch him. Don’t let him out of your sight,” Quinn said as he stormed toward the cabin. “Tell me where she is and I’ll handle this.”
“Now cool off a minute. Get back here,” Deputy Vale said. “Don’t you go throwing around blame. Lia here was right about this place, Quinn.”
Quinn turned back and glanced at Lia. His eyes had that same drained look they had when she first met him. Only there was more. Something she couldn’t put her finger on. Disappointment?
“Ms. Elena didn’t stay long,” the deputy explained. “You see, there was this thing about me ticketing her for obstructing traffic with her oversized, shiny RV. Then you should have seen Posey, smacking her gum at her and not so much as flinching when she insisted they’d run out of all the items on the menu—including coffee. Funny thing when all the coffee shops in town run out of things at the same time, you know? It’s a small town. Word gets around sooner or later. And then, of course, I may have said something about you having left town with your son on a very important business trip.”
“Business trip?” Quinn asked.
“As a law-enforcement officer, I wouldn’t lie. As far as I know, the time you’ve spent staying up here at the cabin has turned into a very important business trip,” he said, tipping his hat at both of them and turning on his heel.
Quinn was speechless. Had the folks of Christmas Town really teamed up to run Elena off? They’d rallied to protect his son. To protect him. He scrubbed his palm across his mouth. He didn’t know what to say. He hadn’t believed Lia when she told him that that’s how the people of Christmas Town were. That he and Jax were safe here.
But they weren’t. Not anymore. Elena would be back. She’d been made a fool of and she knew it. She’d bring her lawyers with her, if for no reason other than payback.
“Quinn, everything is going to be okay,” Lia said. “You have to know that I never meant for anything bad to happen. I knew the people here would never let anyone take Jax from you. You’re one of us, Quinn.”
“No, everything is not going to be okay. Be real. You think she won’t be back? Because she will. And then what? Do you have any idea what legal fees run? I can’t win.”
“But it won’t come to that!”
“You don’t know that for sure. When it comes to my son, I need to be sure.”
The crack in his voice on his last words splintered in Lia’s chest.
“Quinn—”
“You know how you said that sometimes your rescues don’t turn out the way you hope. Well, here’s another one of those cases.”
“You’re not a rescue project to me, Quinn. Maybe at the start, that first night and right after, I did want to help. I won’t deny that. But that’s not all it was. Things changed. I know you felt it too.”
“Things changed all right. I need to be alone. I need to think,” he said, turning for the cabin.
Lia held her breath and tried the keep her tears from falling, but when the cabin door closed, she covered her face and let go.
~*~
Quinn stopped only long enough to give Jax a reassuring smile and to compliment his coloring pages. He kissed him on the head and gave him a tight hug—to reassure himself too—but he also didn’t want Jax picking up on his dad being upset. He left him to color and shut himsel
f up in the bedroom. Everything was caving in on him and he was once again failing to protect and provide for his son. And Lia…oh, Lia. He sat on the edge of the bed and rested his elbows on his legs. He cradled his throbbing head in his hands and tried to squeeze away the pain, but it just spread through him without mercy. He’d let her into his heart. He’d let his guard down and let her in and now nothing would be the same. He took a deep breath. He needed to think straight. He couldn’t do that with Lia tied up in his emotions. Deep down, he knew she was never out to harm them. She was a good person. He never felt about anyone the way he felt about her, but the bottom line was that she’d made a mistake and it was costing him. He had only one option…to take Jax and leave Christmas Town before Elena returned.
The envelope he’d been holding slipped from between his fingers and hit the floor. He picked it up and opened it, half-expecting another gingerbird house order. One he wouldn’t be able to fill because he’d be on the road with no tools and no home again. He scanned the first few sentences then backed up and read more carefully.
“They can’t be serious,” he muttered. Wood Wonders, the company that had run him under, was offering him a position as head of their creative division? He flipped to the second page and every cell in him buzzed and burned. His pulse raced. A salary range and benefits that were higher than anything he’d ever make on his own, plus, an interest in buying his “gingerbird” bird house designs. They wanted him to go to their headquarters in Portland to discuss details. Trip expenses paid. Apparently, the company had an in-house child-care center for all their employees. Jax would be able to stay there during Quinn’s meeting.
All this because of Lia. All this because she didn’t let him hide from the world. Yet everything, including this, was pulling him away from her.
He curled his fists against his eyes and took deep breaths. All the uncertainty, stress and suffering from past months hammered at his chest and demanded to be released. He had to make this meeting. A job and salary like this were his best chance at running off Elena and giving Jax the life he deserved. Lia had said she wished he would put the past behind him and move on with his life. Well, her wish had come true. Christmas Town…and Lia…would soon be a part of their past.
Chapter 8
Quinn held tight to Jax’s hand as they hurried out of the bank and navigated the crowded sidewalks along Congress Street. People rushed to make the most of their lunch hour, disappearing into Portland’s fine bistros and restaurants where they’d indulge their stomachs without worrying about menu prices. He remembered a time where he was just as guilty of taking everyday life and every dollar for granted. That would never happen again.
He detoured, avoiding the streets they used to take to get to the soup kitchen and shelter. He didn't want to take Jax there...at least not yet. Someday soon, though, they'd return to thank those who had helped them in a time of need. And he'd give back. Portland was a beautiful city, rich with historic buildings and monuments and arts. It had a lot to offer. He’d made his start here and now it held his chance at a new beginning. But it also harbored bad memories. Not that he wanted to forget them. Those rough times taught him about what was really important in life…and about how strong he really was.
“We’re not going camping again, are we?” Jax tugged at Quinn’s hand, stopping him in his tracks.
“Camping?” Oh, man. He wasn’t the only one who remembered. Quinn pulled Jax away from the crowd and crouched next to him. Camping was the game they’d played when they abandoned their apartment and began spending nights in shelters. The intention had been to protect his innocence, not scar him.
“No, we’re not camping, son.” He hesitated. Jax trusted him. Playing pretend was one thing, but where did a parent draw the line between fantasy and reality? “You know, that wasn’t really camping, at least not the fun kind with marshmallows and campfires. But we’ll do the fun kind someday. For now, I think it’s time to settle down.”
“I know that wasn’t real camping, Daddy,” Jax said, putting his hands on his hips. “I’ve seen real camping in books. I just played along because you looked like you felt better when you called it that. I didn’t want you sad.”
Leave it to a tiny kid to sucker punch a grown man.
“You’re the best kid ever, you know that?” Quinn wrapped him in a hug.
“I know. And that’s for real,” Jax said.
“It sure is.” Quinn laughed and stood up. “Do you like it here, Jax?”
“I guess. The hotel room is nice, but I liked the cabin better. And I miss all the Christmassy stuff in Christmas Town and Stardust and Firefly and Storm, but most of all, I miss Miss Lia.”
“Yeah, I most of all miss her too,” Quinn said, ruffling up Jax’s hair.
For all Portland had, it didn’t have Lia. Here he stood with advance money in the bank and a signed agreement detailing his work with Wood Wonders, but Lia—who’d changed his life and taught him that he didn’t have to prove anything to anyone—wasn’t here. When he signed the agreement with Wood Wonders he knew that home for Lia would always be in Christmas Town—not Portland or anywhere else in the world. But standing in that conference room, looking out the window at the chain coffee house that sat where his shop used to be, he knew he had to make a decision and, as a parent, his decision needed to center on what was best for Jax. He needed to be smart. He needed a solid future for his son’s sake. He couldn’t risk losing the opportunity of a lifetime. He couldn’t risk staying in Christmas Town with no guarantees that his business would take off or that Lia wouldn’t eventually tire of him the way Elena had.
Pathetic would be someone who is given a chance and doesn’t take it. Lia’s words rang in his head. She’d shown him that sometimes taking risks paid off, but how could he risk losing everything again?
How could he risk his heart?
~*~
Lia sat at the counter at Holly Haven and turned on her laptop. She’d never been so aware of the muddled aromas from pine shavings, earthy feed grains and seeds and pungent droppings that needed to be cleaned up. She spent so much time here that she’d become desensitized to everything but the love of her work…until now. Now, she missed the smell of peanut butter and jelly smeared on Jax’s cheeks, the fresh sawdust that clung to Quinn’s jeans and the warm, soapy scent that was all him.
She logged into her email absentmindedly and scrolled down, going through the motions but barely registering what was on the screen. She almost missed the email she’d been waiting so long for. Her stomach cramped. She knew…just knew…it was going to be another grant rejection. She’d never been such a pessimist, but ever since Quinn and Jax had left, she’d been feeling like a black hole with legs. She clicked on the email.
“Oh my God.” She shifted closer to the screen. Her chest thrummed and tears welled against her lashes. She’d gotten a grant. Holly Haven had a grant, but Quinn wasn’t around for her to share the news with. She covered her mouth as a sob escaped. This was what she’d worked so hard for. But nothing felt the way it was supposed to…the way she’d been dreaming about…because Quinn and Jax were gone and they weren’t coming back.
“Why are you crying?” Molly asked, returning from taking out the trash. She rushed over and put her hand on Lia’s back. “I know you miss them, but you’ve always told me that everything happens for a reason. Even if they weren’t meant to stay here, you still changed their lives. You made a difference, like you always do.”
“It’s not that. I mean, it is that. It’s everything.” She swiped at her cheeks and angled the screen so Molly could see the email while Lia reached for a wad of tissues.
“You did it!”
Molly pulled Lia off the stool and hugged her, which only squeezed out more tears.
“Oh my gosh, I thought you’d be happy,” Molly said.
“I am happy. Of course, I’m happy.” She slumped back down onto the chair. “This is what I’ve been praying for. Now I won’t lose Holly Haven, but I’ve lost h
im.” It took a minute for her to get her tears under control but then hiccups took over. “Molly, I never told Quinn that I love him.”
Molly handed her more tissues, brought the trash bin closer and sat on the stool next to her.
“Can’t you call and tell him?”
“No. It’s too late for that,” Lia said. “I messed up. I became so determined to help him succeed and to help him build a life here, that I forgot that, ultimately, it was his life to fix. It wasn’t mine to save. I was selfish and I chased him away. I may still be surrounded by the friends and family I cherish, but at the same time I feel as if I’ve lost mine.”
“I don’t know what to say. I don’t even have a boyfriend. Seriously,” she added, when Lia lifted her brow. “But maybe if you concentrate on all the positive things you have going on here, it’ll help you heal. You did it. You got the grant. That’s huge.”
“You did it too, Molly. Thank you for everything. Promise me that when you’re a famous veterinarian, you’ll still come back to see us,” Lia said, giving her a hug.
“Let me get through undergrad first,” Molly said. “But no matter what, I’ll come and visit. You won’t need my vet services though. You do have Dr. Garrett here.” She said his name as if to remind Lia that Quinn wasn’t the only man out there. That she had options. But she was wrong. Molly was still in high school. She had yet to find the love of her life. But Lia had been around long enough to know that Quinn and Jax could never be replaced. She’d never love again. Quinn was her soul mate and he was gone for good.
Chapter 9
Lia was skipping Christmas Eve this year. Totally skipping it. She’d given her mom, sister, Molly and Mrs. B each an original QW Gingerbird House yesterday and didn’t go to the pageant in town earlier today. She’d also given excuses for missing Christmas morning because she was pretty sure she’d be sick by tomorrow after all the ice cream she was planning to binge on. She lugged the reusable grocery bag up the path. Walking was supposed to decrease stress, but all she could think about was which of the six tubs of ice-cream to dig into first. Chocolate sounded good. Like his eyes. Never mind. Salted caramel was safer. Maybe it would make chocolate easier to handle.
A Heartwarming Christmas: A Boxed Set of Twelve Sweet Holiday Romances Page 79
