Real Good Man

by Elise Whyles

  He flipped his cell open. “Hello.”

  “Hey, how’s it going?”

  “Hey, sis.” Sean slammed his head into the door behind him. “It’s going.”

  “Something’s wrong, isn’t it?”

  “Nothing you can help me with.”

  “Why not? That’s what family is for, is to help. So tell me, what’s going on?”

  “Luke came home, and the only thing I want to do is strip him naked and drag him into my bed. And never get out again.” Sean slapped a hand over his mouth at the words, thankful no one was in the room as his face heated.

  “Sounds like fun.” Beth chuckled. “That’s not the only thing bothering you, is it?”

  “No. Someone’s been setting fires. I think the old man may be involved, but I don’t have any proof.”

  “I haven’t spoken to him or Mom for a couple of weeks. I can ask if I talk to her again. Though the last time I was there, I overheard Dad talking about getting you back in the fold. Something about doing whatever he had to.”

  “Overheard him? Was he on the phone?”

  “No, he was giving out a reprimand.” Beth’s voice tightened, anger flowing through it. “Look, I’ll ask when I talk to Mom again. I can get answers out of her.”

  “Don’t go getting into…”

  “I won’t. Look, I just called to see if you’d thought about what we talked about last time?”

  “Yeah.” Sean closed his eyes, his body tightening with need as he pictured Luke, shirtless, sweaty, his body moving with the fluid grace he’d long come to expect from him. “I did. And I’m going to do it. I’m going to take the chance and see where it leads me. Just need to get myself together to face him. God, sis, I’m so screwed up. Why would he want to be with me?”

  “Why wouldn’t he? You’re smart, you’re dedicated, loyal, good looking.” The sound of a loud crash had Sean wincing. “Look, I gotta run, but call me later. If nothing else to tell me how much of a chicken you are.”

  “Bye.” Sean chuckled and hung up the phone. The sound of Luke moving around in the house drifted through his bedroom door. He could do this. He could face what he wanted. He turned, opened the door, and stepped out into the narrow hallway.

  “Hey, you okay?” Luke paused in the entrance, a frown on his handsome face. “You look a bit green.”

  “Been a long weekend. I’ll tell you about it later. How was your time off?” Sean shrugged, delving into work rather than what he had to confront. What if Luke really didn’t want him? What if what he thought he’d heard in the shower was only a figment of his imagination?

  “Sean. Sean?” Luke’s touch seared his flesh as he wrapped a hand around his biceps.

  “Sorry, mind was wandering. You were saying?”

  “Just Jack looks like he’s in love. What happened? You’re as jumpy as a long-tailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs.”

  Sean shook his head. His mouth was dry, the butterflies had multiplied, and he wondered if he was just wishing for the unattainable. He offered a weak smile that did little to put Luke off. “No fire to report.”

  “That’s not what I asked.”

  Sean groaned at the angry peal of the phone. He reached past Luke, sucking in a breath when his arm brushed against his hard chest. “Hello, Banff National Park, Officer Tisman speaking.”

  “How long until you are ready to come home?” His father’s angry snarl filled his ear. “I trust you’re done acting like some…”

  “I’m not coming back to the farm.” Sean closed his eyes, his anger flaring anew at the old man’s voice. Any hint of lust, of any emotion other than a cold emptiness yawned within his chest at the old man’s voice. He hated it, hated his reaction, but didn’t know how to change it. “I don’t have time to help with the harvest; hire someone.”

  “It’s your duty to return to help with the harvest, Sean. You are going to own this land someday.”

  “Not fucking likely. I’m rather busy, in case you forgot, I’m on duty today. So unless you’re calling on a business…”

  “Don’t take that tone with me. I’ll expect you in the middle of June.”

  “I won’t be there.” Sean turned away from Luke’s puzzled expression. He didn’t want him to know just how twisted his world was at the moment. “And I’d appreciate it if you’d stop calling here. We have nothing to talk about.”

  “I’ll expect you mid-June. Until then, do try to curb that affliction of yours. While you’re home you can undergo treatment and be the son we knew and loved.”

  “I’m happy with who I am.” The knot of tension formed in his neck.

  “I’m not. I am still the head of this household, and you will obey me,” Louis roared. “I didn’t raise you to be…”

  “Good-bye.” Sean hung up and inhaled, his emotions in upheaval at the brutality in his father’s hatred.

  “You look stressed, why don’t you go have a shower, get cleaned up, and I’ll start dinner,” Luke offered with a gentle nudge. The concern in his gaze pushed back the chill invading Sean’s body as he turned to do as Luke suggested.

  * * * *

  Sean muttered to himself as he cranked the hot water on and put the stopper in the drain. He glanced at the door, hoping Luke was occupied with cooking, before he stripped and slid into the tub. He closed his eyes and leaned back against the cold porcelain, his breath leaving him in a long hiss of pleasure-pain.

  “You’re a coward,” Sean muttered as he turned the water off, the water lapping at his chest. “What’s the worst that could happen? He tell you he’s not interested? Man up, ask him.”

  His hand closed around the bar of soap, rubbing it along his foot. “You know you’re gay, you sort of know he’s gay. Fuck, Sean, you caught him masturbating while calling out your name … just ask him. He’s hot, sexy, single, funny. The man can tie you in knots with a quick grin or just taking off his shirt. Suck it up, be a man and ask.”

  “Sean?” Luke’s voice drifted from the hallway. “You okay?”

  “Yeah, I’m fine,” Sean hollered back. “Nothing a beer and some courage couldn’t help me with,” he muttered, sinking deeper into the steaming water. “God, why me? Beth’s right, I am a coward. Even if it doesn’t last…” He cringed at the emotion swimming through him at the thought. “At least I’ll know I tried.”

  “Luke’s got experience, at least with one or two partners. So what if you’ve never been with a man … you’ve fantasized enough.” Sean berated himself as he scrubbed at his foot. “Man built like him would be enough to stir anyone’s blood.” Picturing Luke’s body through the glass, glistening with moisture, his shaft hard and jutting from his body, drew shards of heat like tiny daggers. He groaned, blood heading south to pool in his groin. He glanced down through the water to his cock. Semi-hard, it bobbed with each movement of his body. The broad head peeked up, tempting, and he dropped the soap, his hand dipping beneath the water.

  He palmed his shaft and gave it a gentle pump, his teeth biting into his lip to still the moan of pleasure. Up, down, he stroked himself, his fingers tickling the front of his nut sack.

  Water sloshed against the tub lip as he rolled his hips into each slow pump. Desire licked along his nerves, building into a hard knot low in his spine. He shuddered as stars exploded behind his eyes. The icy touch of porcelain along the top of the tub against his back drew a startled yelp as he lurched upward away from it. His breath coming in harsh pants, he glanced around, hoping he hadn’t been too loud. “Not like it would matter, Sean. Man’s oblivious and probably better off.”

  “Sean?” Luke knocked on the door. “You okay in there? You’ve been muttering like a crazy person for the better part of half an hour.”

  “I’ll be right out. Just need a quick rinse,” Sean hollered back before dropping his voice to a whisper. “A cold one, because I’m too much of a chicken shit to tell someone I find them attractive.” He stood in the rapidly cooling water and turned the taps on. A moment later, the pulse
of the water beating down on his shoulders soothed the aching muscles even as he reached for his semi-flaccid cock. He fisted it, pumping twice before spitting out a curse and reaching for the faucet. Already the tingles of arousal raced through him. It wouldn’t take much to get him hard again.

  Sean stepped out of the shower and grabbed a towel. He dried off with brisk motions, the movements precise as he rubbed at his skin until it glowed pink. He tugged jeans over his hips and did up the snap. Cool air rushed over him as he stepped into the hall and shuffled toward the kitchen. With each step the tension rebounded, knotting his muscles until they ached. Want warred with experience, warred with the faint thread of shame his upbringing had entangled around his heart.

  The tension stoked his temper. He paused in the doorway to appraise Luke who stood by the sink, bare from the waist up, his socked feet braced as he peeled potatoes. Tight jeans clung to his ass, caressing his powerful legs, the worn material like a second skin. For a split second, the heady flare of jealousy burned away at his temper before he pushed it away.

  Before he could speak, the phone rang. He turned from Luke and grabbed the receiver. “Hello?”

  “I’m glad to hear you’re in. Just wanted to call and find out what time to expect you.” His mother’s monotone held little warmth or understanding.

  “Expect me? For what?” Sean ground out.

  “Have you forgotten we have a harvest to get in soon? Surely you can pull yourself away from your fruity habits long enough to…”

  “No, I can’t. I’m working.”

  “Do not take that tone with me, I won’t tolerate it.” Rose sighed, a put-upon sound that echoed along the phone line.

  “Like I told Dad, if you can’t accept me for who I am, then don’t bother calling me. I’m not going to be available for the harvest, so find someone else.” Sean hung up the phone, tossing it into a drawer and slamming it shut.

  “You okay?”

  Sean looked up, and the heat flared. His stomach dropped, the hard shaft of his cock twitching behind the confines of the denim. Damn him, nobody had the right to look that hot in worn denim. Sean pushed the thought away and shrugged, the muscles in his jaw aching as he clenched his teeth.

  “Sean? Everything okay?”

  “What’s for supper?” He cursed the snark in his tone and glanced from Luke to the counter and then to the floor. He could feel the stirrings behind the denim, feel his blood heating again, and he slouched forward in an attempt to hide it.

  “Steak and potatoes.” Luke shot a glance toward the counter. “You look a bit pissed. Everything okay back home?”

  “Everything’s fine,” Sean ground out. “Just sick of hearing about afflictions and the bullshit. Working out a way to do my job without my family’s interference, without my upbringing making it harder than it already is. Without other people’s bullshit ruining it. There’s a reason I took a job that put me in the middle of bum-fuck nowhere!”

  “What in the hell’s going on? I got back and you took one look at me and stormed off. Fuck, if you don’t want to work with me, say so,” Luke snapped, any trace of calm gone. His eyes darkened to a stormy slate, and he wiped his hands on a towel before throwing it at the counter. Sean’s gaze darted down when Luke crossed his arms over his chest, his pecs flexing with the motion. “I realize it’s difficult, we all have to face situations we don’t like, but this is a bit much, don’t you think?”

  “What in the fuck are you talking about?” Sean shot back. “I didn’t say a damn thing about not wanting…”

  “You didn’t have to.” Luke shook his head. “I’m not stupid. I’ve never tried to hide the fact I’m gay. Every one of the guys in the office knows. It’s not like it’s a big…”

  “You’re gay?” Sean snickered, the sense of irony playing across exposed nerves. The simple words breaking the tenuous control he had on his emotions. For the first time in weeks, he could feel the stretch of confusion, of uncertainty, until it was nearly breaking, and he welcomed it. Welcomed the release, the knowledge that his fantasies weren’t so far off. Didn’t mean Luke wanted him, but it was a start.

  “Yeah, you have a problem with that?” Luke straightened, hands clenched into fists at his side, and his eyes narrowed, flashing with anger.

  “Why would I have a problem with you being gay?” Sean snapped back, relief weaving through the anger. “Why make a big deal out of something like your sexual preference? I mean, why make it so damn hard? Does it make any difference if you prefer cock to pussy? Who gave everyone else the right to judge someone by what they do in their bedroom? I’m not broken, not afflicted with any illness; frankly, I don’t need or want to be fixed. If I have to hear another lecture on duty, responsibility … on fucking being healed, I’m going to throw something. Why couldn’t you be ugly, damn it? Why do I have to figure everything out right this second? For fuck’s sake, I’m a grown man, I can decide for myself…”

  “Sean, no…” Luke’s eyes widened comically, awareness and understanding filling them.

  “And another thing.” Sean cut him off. “Just because I’m not jumping into some guy’s bed with both feet doesn’t make me a coward. I’ve never done this before! So what if I want to be emotionally involved? Why does it all have to be about the sex? It’s just a biological urge; it doesn’t have to be the most important thing in the world.”

  “Sean, it’s okay, I never said…”

  “Do you know how hard it is to be around you?” Sean jabbed a finger into Luke's chest. “Jesus, you’re hot enough to fuel the fantasy of any man or woman. Beth says just tell you, but how the hell does one do that? Huh? How does one figure this all out? I mean…”

  “Sean, just stop.” Luke grabbed his arm, the firm grasp sending sparks of heat along his bare skin.

  “I hate being so … so…”

  “Sean.” Luke pressed a finger to his lips, the anger fading from his eyes. “What are you saying?”

  Sean’s shoulders slumped, the roaring in his ears getting louder and louder. “I’m gay.” The room spun wildly, and he clung to Luke, a deep certainty running through him that he’d pass out if he didn’t.

  “Okay.” Luke inched closer. “And?”

  “I’m attracted to you, but I haven’t got a clue what I’m doing.”

  Sean inhaled sharply when Luke nudged his chin up. He took care to keep his eyes averted, uncertainty and shame clawing at his throat. It would kill him if he fucked this up. It wasn’t like he could just shut himself in his office during the day; they had to work together, had to live together, at least for now. He shifted on his feet and rubbed his sweaty palms along the fronts of his thighs. He inhaled and could smell the faint hint of mint and coffee from Luke’s breath. The scent of spice and warm skin curled around him, tickling his arousal. Heart racing, he lifted his head and froze.

  Luke stared at him, heat and something else in his eyes as he brushed his thumb over Sean’s bottom lip. “There’s nothing to be scared of. You and your previous…”

  “No previous.” Sean rocked forward, his lashes falling to hide his eyes. “I’ve never even kissed a guy before. After my girlfriend and I split, I couldn’t… I mean… I, um…”

  “Shh.” Luke soothed. “It’s like falling off a bike: once you’ve done it, there’s nothing to it.”

  Sean stood inches away and glanced up. Luke was a good four inches taller, but of the same build, something that had driven him crazy more than once. With fingers that trembled, he pressed his palms against his chest. “You sure of that?”

  “Very,” Luke whispered, his breath drifting over Sean’s parted lips. He leaned closer, his tongue darting out to lick at the corner of Sean’s mouth before he pressed his lips gently. Soft, hurried butterfly kisses rained across Sean’s jaw.

  His breath caught, trapped in his throat, and Sean flexed his fingers against the rolling muscles of Luke’s chest as his hands moved, cupping Sean’s jaw. A thick fog clouded Sean’s mind as Luke bent forward, his lips
slipping along Sean’s before his tongue darted out, to sneak between where they parted in a soundless gasp. As quickly as he’d darted in, Luke pulled back. Through the haze, Sean couldn’t get a sense of anything; his body clamoring, he moaned. Everywhere he turned, Luke was there. The desperate need he felt overwhelmed. He shivered at the chill of fear darting up his spine.

  So good. Oh God, it’s never been this good. Sean couldn’t help the tangled thoughts racing in his head. I need more. Want more. Want him to take me in his hand. God, what if I disappoint him? What if I’m not big enough? Marcia always said I was too small, lacking enough for her. What if it’s the same with Luke? He shuddered at the tiny doubts racing through his head, growing steadily in volume.

  Whimpering, he arched against Luke who changed tactics. Instead of nibbling kisses, he laved Sean’s body with his tongue. Tasting, devouring him, until he didn’t know where Luke ended and he began. He gasped at the hard press of a cock against him, the friction swirling until he ached.

  Luke’s lips were everywhere: his cheek, his ear, his neck, shoulder, tiny little nibbles along the tendon running up his neck from his shoulder. The hot flat of his tongue soothed the sting from the bite. His husky whimpers penetrating the fog in Sean’s head.

  Sean closed his eyes, his head tilting back against the wall as Luke drew slow, sensual circles along his collarbone with his tongue. He jumped, a garbled scream escaping at the cool whisper of Luke’s breath over the moist flesh. His heart raced, his pulse throbbed in his ears. Stars danced across his eyes. Uncertain what to do with his hands, he clenched his fists before flattening them against his thighs. Every muscle jerked, his body arching upward at the brush of Luke’s groin. Hot, thick, the shaft pressed against the confines of denim, and the slow grind of Luke’s hips against his sent shards of heat along his cock.