by Fran Baker
“Hello, Anne. Have you been enjoying this lovely country morning?”
“Yes, thank you. Kai and I have been riding. Your grounds are so beautiful.” Anne sensed the older woman’s innate kindness and sincerity. Although they had spent only a brief time together the previous evening it had been plain to Anne that the Lady Hua was a stimulating blend of strength and sensitivity.
“Would you bring me that watering can by the door? Perhaps you would like to help me feed the plants.”
As Anne complied with Lady Hua’s request she was startled by the next remark her hostess made.
“Barbara sometimes worked here with me. But, poor child, it was very hard to get her to leave her room.” Kai’s mother seemed to take it for granted that Anne knew Barbara’s history.
“She must have been a very unhappy person,” commented Anne. “It’s difficult to understand why she couldn’t have been happy being married to a man like Kai.”
Lady Hua looked at her with a direct open gaze and Anne squirmed a little, realizing that her statement had revealed some of her inner feelings about Kai.
“My son could not help her—no one could help her. Barbara’s problems were deep-seated and started long before she met Kai. But she finally reached a point when she could no longer control her illness or her drinking.” Lady Hua paused for a moment and concentrated on pruning a plant. “But it is all over now and I am glad that she does not have to suffer anymore.”
The older woman’s candor was refreshing and Anne felt no unease about visiting Kai’s country home so soon after his wife’s death. The two women tended the flowers in agreeable silence for a while; then Lady Hua caught Anne unaware with another unforeseen remark.
“You and Kai seem to be well-suited for each other. It makes me happy to see him enjoying a woman’s company again. For all practical purposes he has been alone for a long time.” Lady Hua made her statement in a matter-of-fact voice, her eyes on the plant she was tending.
Shades of Sally Tabor—Anne wondered if she was at the mercy of another matchmaker. But Kai’s mother just didn’t seem the type. Anne decided that her first instincts had been right. The Lady Hua was simply a very candid, forthright person. However, her words added fuel to the fire of Anne’s uneasiness about her deepening involvement with Kai. Perhaps it was time for her to take a serious look at what was going on in her life instead of living a day at a time and all the while growing closer and closer to the exotic and complicated Kai Shanpei.
“Yes, we do get along very well,” Anne finally answered. “But, frankly, I'm not looking for a serious relationship right now. I care about your son, but I decided long before I met him that my career was going to come first in my life. I've had one failed marriage and I never want to go through that again.”
Lady Hua responded with an astute comment. “I understand what you say, but one cannot always abide by decisions made in another time and place. Life is like a river that flows between constantly changing banks, and one must be prepared to deal with the changes that occur. At any rate, you are good for Kai and regardless of what happens, I am glad that he met you.”
“Thank you, Lady Hua,” said Anne. “I’m very happy that I met both of you.” A pleasant interlude in my life, she thought, but nothing more than that. Anne then commented to Lady Hua about Kai’s relaxed relationship with his mother. “I can’t help but notice how open you and Kai are with each other. You two seem to have such a good rapport.”
“Thank you for saying that, Anne. We tried to instill in Kai a sense of responsibility as a child and he always knew that we loved and trusted him. I believe that we are close now because of the freedom he had then. If children feel free to leave, they feel free to return.”
Anne looked at the older woman in admiration. If, by chance, Anne should ever have a child, she wanted to remember Lady Hua’s philosophy.
Lady Hua dusted off her hands. “Well, that is enough gardening for one day. Lunch should be served soon.”
Together they left the greenhouse, Lady Hua promising to tell Anne more about her work in the nearby resettlement village of ethnic Chinese who were refugees from Vietnam. Anne looked forward eagerly to their discussion, realizing that here was an opportunity to gather some fresh material for her articles.
Luncheon was a mouth-watering combination of cultures. Cold almond soup was served first, followed by grilled sole and potatoes garnished with parsley. Then Mrs. Burns outdid herself with a delicious dessert of Eight Precious Pudding. After they had eaten, Lady Hua excused herself and Kai and Anne lingered over coffee. Anne felt somewhat restrained with Kai. Although she was having a wonderful time with him, thoughts of trying to slow down their passionate race into a relationship that could only end in painful parting tumbled through her mind.
“I’m sorry, what did you say?’ Preoccupied with her rather negative thoughts, Anne had not heard Kai’s question.
“You were certainly far away just then,” he commented. “I asked if you would like to walk in the maze.”
“Oh, yes, I've been anxious to explore it. And a little exercise would be good for me after that meal. Mrs. Burns is an excellent cook.”
A gate led from the rose garden into a lovely landscaped area in which the focal point was a labyrinth of hedges, some of which were clipped and trained into elaborate portrayals of dragons, dogs and other animals. Kai teasingly suggested that Anne go into the maze first.
“I'll give you a three-minute lead, then I'll try to find you.” Kai looked pleased about this little game and Anne suspected that finding her way out of the maze was not going to be easy.
Some ten minutes later Anne came out of the shadow of a tall section of hedge and found herself in the center of the maze. In front of her was a stone bench that was mirrored in the pool by which it sat.
She had heard Kai’s voice from time to time while wandering through the green paths, but hadn’t answered. As she stood there feeling smug about eluding him she was startled by a pair of strong arms that encircled her from behind.
“Ha! I've caught you,” whispered Kai. His breath tickled her neck and her heart pounded with surprise.
“Where did you come from?” Anne demanded, twisting round in his arms to look at him.
They walked over to the stone bench and sat together to watch the placid surface of the pond. Water trickled silently down the sides of an old moss-covered fountain in the center of the pool. In the distance Anne could hear the raucous cries of some peacocks who had been disturbed.
“What a peaceful place this is,” she said to Kai. “Both your home on Victoria Peak and this house in the country give me such a feeling of serene contentment. What was that you told me about when we were riding—about man’s relationship with nature?”
“Fung shui. It's something you will appreciate more and more as you leave your hectic lifestyle behind from time to time and spend time here or on Victoria Peak.”
Kai’s casual assumption that he and Anne were going to continue their affair indefinitely snapped her out of her relaxed mood. She receded within herself, rehashing those deep fears of commitment. Abruptly, she rose from the sun-warmed bench.
“So how do we get out of this place?” Anne hoped that her light tone would disguise the turmoil that she was feeling.
Seeming to sense that something had affected Anne’s mood, Kai stood up, too. “Come. I'll show you a quick way out. I think we have played enough games for a while.”
As they walked together between the tall cool hedges, Anne pondered the significance of Kai’s last remark. Was he referring to their hide-and-seek contest in the maze, or was there a deeper meaning in his words? Perhaps he was also beginning to feel some misgivings about their situation. The pleasant intimacy of the weekend was suddenly dissipated and there seemed to be a wide chasm between them.
Kai broke the silence by suggesting an afternoon swim. Anne had earlier noticed the inviting swimming pool near the terrace where they had had breakfast.
Back at the house, they went to their rooms to change into swimsuits. Anne eyed herself critically in the beveled mirror on her dressing room door. Her sleek black maillot clung to her like a second skin and the swell of her breasts was visible in the deep vee front. Sally Tabor had convinced her that she should buy that suit the day they had gone on their shopping spree, even though Anne’s taste was normally more conservative.
Anne walked across the terrace and stood looking over a low wall. Kai was swimming the length of the pool with strong, sure strokes. He reached the edge and pulled himself out of the water, his muscular back glistening in the sunlight.
“How’s the water?” Anne called.
“Perfect,” Kai answered. “Come and try it.”
Anne joined him at poolside and warily stuck her toes into the water. Finding it pleasantly cool, she sprang into an arching dive that cut the surface of the water cleanly. She swam underwater until her lungs were crying for oxygen, then broke the surface, gasping. Kai was nowhere in sight, then something brushed by her legs and he was suddenly beside her in the water.
Laughing, Anne said, “You certainly are good at slipping up on me.” Her earlier negative mood had evaporated and she once again felt free and open with Kai.
They spent the rest of the afternoon alternating water play with sunbathing. Kai was impressed with Anne’s swimming ability and she told him about her high school and college days, when she had been a championship swimmer. Anne didn’t realize how late it had become until Mrs. Burns came out on the terrace and asked if they would like cocktails. Kai ordered Scotch and water for both of them and they took a last dip before toweling themselves off.
“Here are your drinks and I hope you’re both hungry. I’m cooking a big pot of clam chowder.” Mrs. Burns bustled back to the house humming a gay melody.
“She’s always happy when she can prepare a large meal,” Kai explained. “Pots and pans are to her what brushes and paints are to an artist.” As an afterthought, he added, “They’re both going to be hard to replace.”
“There’s no hurry, is there?”
“They told me today that they’re definitely going to leave, but that they’ll stay on as long as possible so that we can hire new people. I know that they’re anxious to go home, so I need to begin interviewing right away.”
When Mrs. Burns came out again to ask if they would like another drink, Anne excused herself to go shampoo her hair and dress for dinner. Kai told her that his mother would be dining with them that night, since he and Anne would be leaving for the city the next day.
Dinner that evening was memorable. Anne, dressed simply in a multicolored cotton dress from India, wore her hair as Kai liked it best, loosely flowing over her shoulders. She joined in Kai’s laughter as he and his mother engaged in a joking argument on the pros and cons of Oriental versus Western cuisine. The Lady Hua left them shortly after dessert and they took glasses of wine out onto the terrace to watch the moon rise.
“Anne, would you like to talk about what’s been bothering you today?”
Anne took a deep breath and thought about how to answer Kai’s question. She was so confused by her feelings that she hesitated to try to explain why she withdrew from him at times.
“Kai, when we began seeing each other I told you how I felt about serious relationships with men. We . . . we have been together a great deal lately and I . . .” She paused, contemplating how to continue. “I guess I have ambivalent feelings about this whole thing with us.” She looked at him with eyes that pleaded for understanding.
“Do not worry, my lady.” Kai took her hand and kissed her cheek. “What will happen, will happen. I feel no pressure because of our relationship and you should not, either. Let us take pleasure in what we have today.”
* * * *
On Sunday morning Anne awakened to the sounds of birds singing outside her open window. Kai had bade her good night at her bedroom door the night before and she had slept fitfully, half wishing that she hadn’t spoken to him so openly about the doubts preying on her mind.
They had breakfast on the terrace and Kai told Anne that they could take another ride before returning to Hong Kong. The long ride of the day before had calmed the horses down and they were content, as was Anne, to amble along at a slow pace. The morning passed with no mention of Saturday evening’s conversation and, after a light lunch, Anne packed her bag in preparation for the drive home.
Lady Hua came to the front door as Mr. Burns was carrying their luggage to the car. “My dear, I would like you to come again. I have enjoyed your visit.”
“Thank you.” Anne took Lady Hua's proffered hand. “You have been very kind.” Anne felt that she and Kai’s mother could become good friends if they had an opportunity to spend more time together. Thoughts of the possible promotion and move to some faraway UNA office crossed Anne’s mind. Chances were that she wouldn’t be seeing much more of the Lady Hua.
In a matter of moments Kai’s powerful car was pulling away for the drive back to Hong Kong. Both occupants of the Mercedes were unusually quiet. Anne didn’t know why Kai wasn’t saying much, but she was well aware of her own reasons for silence. This weekend in the country had been confusing and disturbing to her. The depth of her emotional attachment to Kai was becoming more evident to her and she was just going to have to call a halt to the snowballing affair with Kai Shanpei. Anne clenched her fists in determination and blindly stared out the window at the landscape rushing by.
Chapter 11
In the days following her visit to West Wind Anne felt like she was trapped in the eye of a tropical storm that was soon due to strike again. The pressures were building, both internally and externally, and her heart hammered whenever she contemplated the choices awaiting her. She tried to blame her malaise on the abnormally sticky humidity that was gripping Hong Kong and abrading everyone’s disposition to sandpaper courtesy. When that premise faltered in the face of truth, she simply allowed her apprehensions free rein. Anne’s dreams were dramatic spectacles of contradiction, resplendent with Kai’s molten gold image one moment, haunted by her own irrational fears the next. Sometimes she woke in the middle of the night, craving the sensuous dance of his warm hands on her body, yet feeling smothered by the enormous weight of her doubts. Defenseless in the dark, vaguely frightened of the strange moonlit shadows lurking in familiar corners of her mind, she pondered the details of her complex anguish.
Commitment—was it a tender trap for those who loved or a cleverly disguised emotional jail? Did professional ambition doom her to a monastic existence and the crushing loneliness of marriage to her career? If life was a wonderful smorgasbord of opportunities, why was she starving for interaction on a personal level?
Sunny morning failed to lighten her mood. Even the new assignment list—usually full of fascinating opportunities—couldn’t lift her out of her depression. By accident alone Anne spotted a mistake on the sheet that Dick had laid on her desk, and she sought him out for an explanation.
“Somebody must have gotten me mixed up with the sports reporter,” she said, laying the page in front of him for correction.
Dick tossed a verified article into the outgoing news basket, checked the list she was questioning, then shook his head. “That's my doing,” he affirmed.
“But I don’t know anything about cricket!” Anne’s lethargy melted away in the heat of her protest. “Besides, I’m supposed to cover the financial and political scenes. What do I know about—”
“You’re supposed to cover whatever I assign you to cover,” Dick interrupted, pleasantly indifferent to her aggravation. “If you don’t know anything about the subject, then it's time you learned.”
Properly chastised by his mild rebuke, Anne felt the sting of embarrassment on her cheeks. “I’m sorry about the outburst,” she murmured. “It just came as such a surprise.” A halfhearted smile curved her lips. “If you need an article on cricket, that's exactly what you’ll get. But you have to promise to be patient with my ignorance.
”
“It’s a deal.” Dick grinned as he twirled his pencil between his thumb and forefinger. Let’s talk,” he suggested then, leaning back in his chair and propping his feet on the ancient typewriter that had served him well in war and peace.
Anne frowned in confusion, but she sat down, facing him across the scarred surface of his desk.
“Don’t give me that ‘wounded puppy’ look,” he admonished. “I didn’t assign you to that story as punishment.”
“It sure seems that way,” she countered, a spark of her old spirit flickering in her eyes.
“What do you believe is the most important asset that an editor can possess?” He regarded her thoughtfully, his head tilted to one side. When it became obvious that Anne was groping for an answer, Dick supplied his own. “Versatility.”
“I don’t understand what that has to do with me reporting the outcome of a cricket match,” she groused. Her gaze wandered impatiently from the litter of copy he had been perusing to his rumpled plaid jacket hanging limply on the clothes tree in the corner. The room looked like Dick—plain, honest and efficiently arranged.
“Editors live with the unexpected, Anne, and they never encounter the same situation twice.” He leaned forward and laced his fingers in front of him. “When disaster strikes and everyone else is in a panic, we’re trained to remain tranquil. If we want to last in this crazy, terrific business we have to learn to react with our heads instead of our hearts.” His expression reflected the sincerity of his words. “And as unfair as it might seem, editors also have to develop a minimal amount of expertise on a wide variety of subjects— including sports.”
It occurred to Anne that this master craftsman was leading up to something, but she had no idea in which direction he was heading. Rather than try to anticipate and guess wrong. she sat quietly with her hands folded in her lap. Maybe this way she would absorb some of his equanimity—heaven knew she could certainly use all of the help she could get.
