Her shoulders shook as a tremble rolled through her body.
Oh, God, not Josh too.
****
Lucas dragged on his boots, combating his own concerns. Josh hadn’t been in the best mindset when he’d left, and Lucas could only fault himself for that. He should have put a little more insistence in his offer to let Josh use his guest room. Should have known better than to expect Josh to go back to Amanda’s, given not only what he’d said, but also what Josh had argued with her about. Josh would want time to think. Time to mull things over in his mind so he could figure out how to proceed with the new information.
Lucas stuffed his arms into the heavy Carhartt he used for farm chores and stormed out the door, skidding down his front steps. With an oath, he grabbed the handrail, stopping his fall. If he didn’t check his emotions and keep his head about him, he’d be the one someone went looking for.
Using both hands, he yanked open his truck’s door and climbed up. The engine protested as he turned the key. After a few slips, it caught and roared to life. He flipped on the heat, turned it up as high as it would go, and pushed the button for the windshield defroster. As slippery as it was, scraping the ice off would only land him flat on his ass in the middle of his driveway.
Each minute that ticked by felt like an eternity’s passing as he waited for the glassy film to dissolve. He focused on Josh, recreating the conversation they’d had in an effort to pass the time.
Had Josh decided to go back to Kansas City? The last thing Lucas had said to him insinuated he ought to. But no, Josh had countered with the remark he should have come sooner. Josh wouldn’t turn around and go to the city after saying something like that. Besides, he had more sense than to try to drive on the highway in weather like this. Despite his poor decisions, he wasn’t a fool.
Where then? A rented room?
Doubtful. Josh had never allowed Amanda to stay mad at him. He always went out of his way to try and smooth over their arguments. Just like she did. Neither one of them could tolerate fighting with the other. No way would he rent a room and let her stew all night.
Yet he hadn’t gone back. Not yet at least. Which meant he had someplace else in mind first. And since her house was only a few blocks away, if he’d slid into a curb, he could have walked and gotten there a long time ago. Hell, it was almost two hours now since he’d left.
Where the hell had he decided to go?
Not the bar. Josh never turned to drinking when he was upset. It was too much like his father.
Lucas looked up, blinking. His father.
Ducking sideways, he peered through the large hole in the ice. Large enough he could see through. For good measure, he twisted his windshield washers on. Trying the window, he found it frozen shut.
“Damn it,” he muttered.
He opened the door and stepped out, glancing up and down the street. No cars. Not even a distant pair of headlights. He climbed back inside and backed onto the road. When his tires slipped, he put the truck in four-wheel drive. While it wouldn’t prevent a full-out skid, it would give him more traction. Even if it didn’t, it made him feel better to engage all four wheels.
Heading for Bloom Street, Lucas tempered the urge to stomp on the gas pedal and speed to Josh’s old house. Everything inside him demanded he hurry, but common sense insisted that would get him nowhere, except perhaps a trip to the hospital. He navigated with care, took his turns at a crawl.
In front of Josh’s old house, he slowed even more, scanning the street for the bright red Mustang. Had Josh been here?
Lucas felt certain he had. He couldn’t put his finger on it exactly, but something about the way Josh reacted, the expression on his face. If he’d wanted to make peace, Josh would have started here. Because here was where his divide with Amanda began.
But if this was where he’d gone, the polished sports car wasn’t here now.
Lucas eased down the street, tracking west and north toward Amanda’s house. As he turned onto Amella, his hind end fishtailed. He let up on the brake, took his foot off the gas, and steered through the swerve, straightening out as his tires struck the pebbled shoulder.
Unclenching his hands from the wheel, he took a deep breath. Damn it all, they really needed to fix this crater they’d created when a water line burst. He’d almost slid off the edge. He glanced over, looking at the five-foot drop that had once been a nicely-graded, drainage ditch.
His gaze fell on a red Mustang, lying on its side, driver’s door against the ground.
“Shit!”
Lucas bolted from the truck and skidded on the gravel. Giving in, he fell to the ground and half-slid, half-crawled on his ass, easing down the slope.
“Josh!”
Something pounded dully against the windshield, the muffled thump kicking Lucas’ heart into double-time. Josh was still inside. Christ, was he hurt?
Lucas stumbled over the slick ground, grabbing at tall tufts of grass to steady himself as he hurried to the vehicle. He peered into the windshield, barely able to make out Josh’s form in the dim light.
“You okay?” he hollered.
Josh nodded his head. Through the glass, his muffled, “Yeah,” resonated in the quiet.
“I’m gonna call someone just in case. Be right back,” Lucas belted out.
Movement from inside stilled his retreat. He squinted, trying to get a better look.
Josh shook his head side-to-side, adamant. With one hand, he stabbed his index finger at the passenger window.
Bewildered, Lucas lifted his gaze, looking for what Josh was trying to point out. The car looked intact. Certainly no danger threatened Josh from that side. He frowned. “What?”
He couldn’t make out the answer. Bending closer to the windshield, he repeated, “What?”
“Break it.” As if Josh spoke through a long tunnel, his demanding tone drifted through the thick glass.
What the hell? That’d only rain glass down on Josh. The only other option was to break either the front windshield, or the rear glass. Breaking the rear would pose problems getting him out, particularly if he were injured. The front would throw glass back in Josh’s face.
Muttering, Lucas looked around for something he could use to smash the window. Grass and small pebbles dotted the land around him, things that wouldn’t even scratch the glass.
He’d have to go back to his truck. He still had the tools from fixing the fence stuffed in the toolbox. The heavy handled wire-cutters would work.
“Be right back,” he yelled as he started up the slippery slope.
The cold forgotten, Lucas skated his way to his truck and rummaged through his toolbox. Finding the heavy cutters, he stuffed them inside his coat pocket. He’d need both hands to get back down to the car and to get up on the window.
This time, he gave up all thought of a graceful descent and sat down. With a mighty push, he slid down the ice-covered grass and landed at the bottom like a child on a sledding slope. He slipped as he tried to stand, nearly falling face-first into the front bumper, but caught himself at the last minute on the hood.
Slowing his pace, he worked his feet back under him and with a grunt, hauled himself up onto the car’s passenger side, front fender. Beneath his feet, the metal gave, creating a sizeable divot. He dropped to his hands and knees, inching forward, across the door panel, onto the rear fender where he turned around.
“Turn your head,” he belted.
If Josh heard him, he couldn’t tell. From this angle the light faded completely, and he couldn’t see what, if anything his friend did.
He adjusted his grip on the cutters. With a slow arc, he tested his swing, sighting in on the middle of the glass.
Summoning all his strength, Lucas turned his head to the side and brought his arm down on the glass. It shattered instantly, the sharp points of the cutting claw creating a hole about the size of a golf ball in the window. Large enough he could fit the tool inside and jerk it around, kn
ocking loose the little square pieces of tempered glass until nothing remained of the window.
He leaned over the frame. “You okay in there?”
“I’m fucking cold,” Josh answered through chattering teeth.
“You hurt?”
“No,” he snapped. “The damn seatbelt won’t release, and I can’t reach my pocketknife. I’ve been sitting here on my ass freezing to death.”
The tension drained from Lucas’ body. Josh was okay. Pissed off, but okay. Amanda wouldn’t freak out.
He bent over more, sticking his head inside the opening. “Try these.” He passed Josh the cutters.
After a few moments, Josh swore again.
“What’s the problem?”
“My hands are shaking too bad.”
“Christ, Josh, I find you, an’ now you expect me to cut your sorry ass out of there?” Lucas couldn’t resist the jest.
Evidently, Josh didn’t find it amusing. “Shut up, asshole. Help me out of this before I freeze to death.”
Stifling a chuckle, Lucas inched forward, easing his upper body into the car. He took the cutters back and carefully slid them between the lap belt and Josh’s pants. With several twists and tugs, the nylon belt gave. The shoulder strap snapped back into the seat.
He offered his hand to Josh and grinned when his friend clasped it heartily. Backing out of the open window, Lucas guided Josh, giving him leverage and support as he climbed over the console and finally stuck his head out of the window.
Bits of glass and dried blood clumped against his temple on the opposite side of Josh’s head. Lucas eyed it, noting a thin, but steady trickle still dripped down his cheek.
“I think we ought to take you by the hospital. What did you hit your head on?”
“The driver’s window. I’m fine. Take me to Amanda’s.” He pulled himself through the opening and onto the front fender.
“C’mon, Josh, don’t be foolish. You hit your head, and you’ve been out in the cold for what now, two hours? Your face’s ghost white, and your lips are blue. Let me take you over to the hospital.”
As he slid off the fender to the ground, Josh shook his head. “No. Take me to Amanda’s. You know if you don’t, she’ll find some way to get to the hospital. The last thing I want her doing is coming out in this weather, particularly with Emma.”
He had a point. A very sound point. Once Amanda heard Josh was going to the hospital, she’d never believe he was okay until she saw it for herself. She’d wake Emma up, put her in the car, and drive like a turtle all the way there. But Lucas didn’t want them on the road anymore than Josh did, even if they moved at a slug’s pace.
Joining Josh in the frosty grass, he nodded at the incline. “Go on.”
Josh paused for a moment then glanced over his shoulder. “Thanks, Luc. I don’t know how you happened to be coming by here, but thanks.”
Lucas smiled. “You forget you’re my best friend. Get. It’s cold out here, don’t ya know?”
Twenty
Despite the heavy blast of the truck’s heater, Josh couldn’t shake his chills. He’d never felt so cold. Two hours in twenty-degree weather, and the heat in his car rapidly faded with his driver’s window shattered. Hunched down in his coat, he ignored the sticky feeling on the side of his face, trying to trap as much of his body heat as he could.
And thought of Amanda.
The crash wasn’t life threatening. He’d known that when the Mustang’s hind end skidded off the edge. But the temperatures, and the abandoned roads could have been. If he’d been able to get out of the seatbelt, he’d have already walked back to Amanda’s. He’d have to make sure he had something in the center console from now on.
“That cut doesn’t look so good, bud,” Lucas commented.
“It’s fine.” Josh cringed inwardly at the harshness in his response. He didn’t mean to snap at Lucas, he just wanted his thoughts undisturbed. Seeking to soften his remark, he added, “Head wounds always bleed. I’ll clean it up when I get inside.”
“You’re gonna freak Amanda out if you show up with blood rollin’ down your face.”
“She’ll freak more if I don’t walk in that door.”
Lucas fell into silence. Blessed silence, given Josh’s present mood. If Lucas was out looking for him, that meant Amanda was worried. And the idea of upsetting her, after discovering all the things he had tonight, only eroded his demeanor more.
The truck’s crawling pace had him bouncing one knee restlessly. Less than two blocks from her house, and Josh wanted to get out and run, not inch past driveways. Wanted to barge through her door and hold her, apologize for everything he’d done, and start making up for it right there. It would take a long time to prove himself to her. Wasting more time only made it worse.
He’d had quite a bit of time to think about what he intended to do first, and that involved figuring out how to cook breakfast. With all the things she had to do each morning, he wanted the ability to treat her to an occasional morning’s sleep-in. He could get Emma up, feed her, and bring Amanda breakfast in bed. It wasn’t a job he wanted to assume full-time, but it was one way he could show her he was willing to give a little. If he spent the time to look at the directions on the back of the pancake mix, instead of the pictures, he might actually pull it off. They’d find out in the morning.
Sometime tomorrow, he planned on sitting her down and having a heart-to-heart about this piece of property. He’d signed a contract, and he couldn’t back out now without paying a penalty and refunding his deposit. But if she agreed to accept the money to bring the taxes current, his contract was null and void. If the land meant that much to her, she needed to accept her circumstances and act, not sit back and hope a solution would land in her lap. She wouldn’t like hearing it, but ignoring it was like trying to avoid a pink elephant sitting in the middle of the room.
From there, he’d put everything aside and focus on Christmas. He still didn’t have a single idea what to get her, but he’d figure it out. He hadn’t obligated his land to Sandra yet. If Amanda’s fell through, Emma could keep her pony out there. He’d pay Lucas to fix the fences and learn how in the process.
After all that, Josh didn’t know what to do. None of those things addressed getting Amanda and Emma to Kansas City. While he could stay through the holidays, his projects wouldn’t wait much longer. Contractors and developers alike would be breathing down his throat by the end of the first week of the new year. January was crammed full of work, and he’d be hard pressed to find the time to even visit for a weekend.
He had to convince her somehow.
Lucas pulled into Amanda’s driveway and killed the engine. While he climbed out carefully, Josh threw open the door and shuffled across the ice-covered pavement, skiing uphill toward the front door. He didn’t wait for Lucas to catch up, nor did he knock.
He let himself inside and stopped short as Amanda whirled around to face him. Her ashen expression and wide eyes said everything. His gut tugged fiercely as his heart turned over.
Even angry, she’d worried.
“Josh!” she cried in a quiet voice. A second later she rushed at him.
He caught her close, and tucked her head into his shoulder, holding her tight. Molded up against him, he could feel the way her body shook; hear the unsteadiness in her breath. Her fingers dug into his back, and her arms tensed with the effort of holding on.
“It’s okay, baby. I’m here.”
“I was so scared, so worried. The roads are so bad, and you were so mad when you left,” she mumbled into his shoulder.
From the corner of his eye, he noticed Lucas edge past him and move toward the couch. Ignoring him, Josh turned his face into Amanda’s hair, inhaling her fruity shampoo. He lowered his voice to an intimate whisper. “Shh, honey. I’m fine. I told you I wasn’t leaving you. I’m here, stop shaking.”
She looked up at him, blinking back the tears that had welled in her eyes. A stray drop tumbled
down her cheek, but the others disappeared. “You’re not fine. You’re hurt.”
He couldn’t help but chuckle. Always worrying about everyone but herself—she was such a priceless woman.
Caught up by the tenderness reflecting in her blue eyes, he dipped his head in search of her mouth. Offering it freely, she rose to her toes, meeting him halfway. The soft contact sent a jolt of electric energy surging through him, and in that heartbeat, the chill that lingered in his bones ebbed completely.
Sliding his hands along her arms, he framed her face between his palms, drowning in the sweet taste that was all Amanda. Slow and leisurely, he drank until thirst spawned a gnawing hunger. It settled hollowly in his gut, crept through his veins, and tightened his chest. Unchecked emotion, set free to mingle with hers and intensify from the heady combination. Insistent. Demanding. Suffocating.
She loved him, and he needed that love more than he’d ever realized. He always had. It grounded him, made the darkest moments of his life brighter—all things that sitting in front of his old house unveiled.
The sound of the front door closing pulled him from his blissful haze. He drew away, glancing to where he’d last seen Lucas. The chair was empty, the rush of cool air against Josh’s back telling him his friend had left.
Smiling down at Amanda, Josh brushed a thumb over the streak of blood that marred her pretty cheek. “I need to clean up,” he whispered, hating the idea of doing anything but taking her straight up to the bedroom where he could show her without words how much he needed her.
With a soft smile, she fingered the clotted hair near his cut. “Let me?”
Nothing sounded better than the feel of her gentle fingertips. He nodded.
She stepped back. “Lay down on the couch. I’ll be right back.”
As she disappeared down the hall, he shrugged out of his coat, pulled off his shoes, and stretched out on the couch, keeping one arm beneath his head to prevent smearing blood on the off-white cushions.
She’d worried about him. Really worried. He couldn’t stop dwelling on that discovery. It touched him more than it ought to, reminded him that even at her angriest, her love never faltered.
All I Want for Christmas is Big Blue Eyes Page 17
