I made my way back to the kitchen for another drink. Why do I care what she does and whom she does it with? I had rejected her and let her leave. I was a vile creature in her eyes. That is what I had wanted. My phone rang and I felt the sadness wash away. She changed her mind. I grabbed the phone and held it up to read the caller I.D. It was Angela. My heart sank. I poured another drink as I thought about answering it. Soon, the apartment filled with silence. I quickly dialed Emma again. I needed to know she was alright and wasn’t going to do anything stupid on account of me. It rang three times before a voice answered, but it wasn’t Emma.
“Hello?” A female asked. I could barely hear her over the thudding of the music in the background.
“Is Emma there?” I asked, hoping I had the right number.
“She’s right here. You should hang out with us. We’re at The Rapture.” She giggled, slurring her words. I heard a man’s voice in the background and I could have sworn he said Emma’s name.
“Perhaps” I replied as I ended the call. I knew I shouldn’t go, but Emma obviously had a low tolerance for alcohol, as evident by her injured hand. I couldn’t live with myself if she was taken advantage of by someone else. Could I live with myself if it was I who took advantage of her? I didn’t want to know the answer. I grabbed my keys and went after her. I just needed to know she was alright.
I sat in the parking lot at the club, trying to convince myself that I had no right to care. If I went to her, everyone would see me. I wouldn’t be able to show my face at the college again. I gripped the door handle. Just then Emma stumbled outside of the club. I breathed a sigh of relief. I grabbed my phone and hit redial.
“What?” She asked bitterly. I deserved her anger, but it didn’t make it easier to take.
“You look like you’ve had too much to drink.” I said, frustrated with her lack of self-control. Coming from me, it was laughable. I got out of my car and leaned against it, watching her. Her eyes quickly scanned the parking lot, coming to rest on me. I couldn’t help but smile.
“I can take care of myself, but thanks for your concern.” She spat angrily.
“I’ll give you a ride.” I tried to hide the growing frustration in my voice.
“Fine” She replied before hanging up. She walked towards me and my smile grew wider. I wanted to take her in my arms right there but instead, I opened the passenger door.
Chapter Eleven
She looked uncomfortable. Her arms wound tightly around her waist.
“Have fun?” I hated to see how self-destructive she really was. It made me ill.
“I had a great time.” She bit back. She wouldn’t meet my gaze. “Where are we going?”
“Back to my place. You need to eat something.” She needed to sober up. She couldn’t go back home wasted and depressed. I needed to protect myself. At least, that’s what I told myself. I knew I really wanted to make sure she was okay. I had nearly barged into that club, career be damned. Even with the slight buzzing of alcohol coursing through my veins, I knew I was willing to risk everything for her.
“I need to call my aunt. If she comes home and I’m not there…” She pulled her phone out of her pocket. I reached over, placing my hand on it before she could dial. The touch of her skin against mine, however slight, sent a shock through my body. Her eyes grew wide. She had felt it too. I swallowed hard, pushing what I felt deeper.
“Send her a message. Tell her you are staying at a friend’s house. It won’t look good that you’re hanging out with your professor.” I said. Her eyes stayed fixed on mine. She nodded and reluctantly withdrew my hand. She quickly typed out a message and slipped the phone back into her pocket. We rode in silence for the remainder of the short drive to my place.
As we pulled inside, I sat for a moment, contemplating my next move. Give her something to eat, than take her home. She is not yours to worry about. I was determined to not hurt her again.
I exited the car and waited for her to join me. I motioned towards the steps, placing my hand on the small of her back as I guided her upstairs. My pulse quickened at the feel of her muscles in her back.
As we stepped inside, I was careful to put some distance between us. I quickly went to work at preparing her something to eat. What do angels eat? I thought as she settled in on a bar stool across the island.
She picked at her sandwich, ignoring her glass of water. I pushed the glass closer.
“Thank you” She said quietly. I ran my hands through my hair, trying desperately not to focus on her mouth as she ate. I grabbed my bottle of liquor and filled my glass. She ate in silence as she watched me slip further and further away. “I’m sorry…about earlier.” Her eyes fixated on her food.
“I’m the one who should be apologizing.” I replied, shaking my head. “I should have never brought you here. I can’t do this to you.” Saying the words aloud felt like a dagger in my chest. I took another drink. She pushed back from the counter and headed towards the door.
“You said that already.” Her voice was small and she was on the brink of losing it all over again. I followed after her, not letting myself think of the consequences. She opened the door and I pushed it closed from behind her. I had to explain. I couldn’t let her think any of this was her fault. I had preyed upon her like an animal. She turned slowly to face me. I was close enough to feel the heat from her body. I single tear slid down her cheek. I am an animal playing with its food.
“I didn’t say I don’t want to, I said I couldn’t.” I wiped away the tear with my thumb. She didn’t pull away from me. Her expression changed from wanting to escape to pure wanting. She grabbed my hand in hers and held it against her face. She felt it too. “You don’t want this.” I whispered as she moved closer. Her hands left mine and she slowly began to undo the buttons of my shirt. This time, her hands where steady. She pushed the shirt from my shoulders, letting it fall to the floor below. I grabbed the bottom of my under shirt and pulled it over my head. My eyes never left hers. I began to undo my belt as her hands slid across my chest. I folded it over in my hands and undid my button, letting my jeans sag low on my hips. “You’re being a very bad girl.” The hint of smile played at the corners of her mouth.
“What are you going to do to me?” I could hear the nervousness in her voice. I grabbed her uninjured hand and lowered it to my zipper. I pushed against her so she could feel how much I wanted her. She gasped but did not pull away. I leaned in closer to her ear, letting my lips brush against her.
“I’m going to punish you.”
Chapter Twelve
Her hand flexed against me and I almost fell to my knees with her touch. I began to slowly rock against her as her hand moved delicately over me. “That’s enough fun for you. Now it’s my turn.” I wanted to dominate her. I wanted to make her feel things she never had imagined. I wanted her to let go and to give her pleasure over to me. I led her to my bedroom at the far end of the floor. “In here I am in charge. In here you belong to me.” Her eyes danced over the bed. “We will take it slow at first.” I walked towards her slowly, praying she wouldn’t run away. I slipped my hands onto either side of her face and slowly leaned in to kiss her. She didn’t pull away from me. After a moment, her body relaxed against mine, her lips parting, giving me entrance. Her hands raised, and she trailed her fingertips down my stomach. I grabbed hold of her quickly. I wasn’t ready to not have full and total control. “You can’t touch me unless I tell you to. Understand?” She understood completely. She willingly sacrificed herself to the wolf.
My mouth found hers again and we picked up where we had left off. I slipped my fingers under the hem of her shirt. She gasped aloud at my touch but didn’t stop me. I was waiting for her to run away at any moment, but she didn’t. I pulled my mouth free of hers to watch her as I slowly circled her stomach with my fingertips. Her body vibrated beneath me. I pulled the shirt over her head and stepped back to drink her all in. She hadn’t worn a bra. That was an unexpected bonus. She crossed her arms over her chest, t
rying to hide herself. “Move your arms. I want to see you.” I regretted my tone but she did as I asked. Her arms fell, reluctantly to her sides. She caught her bottom lip between her teeth as she looked at the floor. “Look at me.” I ordered. Her eyes met mine, setting my entire body on fire. I stepped closer to her, a bee to a flower. I traced the top of her jeans with my fingers, allowing them to dip slightly out of sight. Her gaze never left mine as I slowly leaned closer, allowing my lips to brush the delicate skin of her neck. She shivered beneath me as I explored her further with my tongue. I made my way to her breasts, sliding my mouth over one of her nipples as I undid the button of her jeans. The sound that escaped her mouth was the most erotic noise ever uttered. I looked up at her, as I repeated the flicking action of my tongue. She was slowly unwinding and on the brink of ecstasy. Her fingers wound into my hair and tugged gently.
“Bad girl” I scolded her. “I know how we can fix that.” I had been dying for this moment. I didn’t like when anyone broke the rules but I knew what would come after would be sheer bliss. I licked my lips at the sight of her, playing with the belt in my hands. “Lay down” I motioned towards the bed. She didn’t hesitate for a second. She slid her body past mine, making sure to brush her naked chest against mine. She crawled across my bed, laying in the center. I couldn’t look away. I followed her, crawling over top of her body, careful not to rest any weight on her. I slid the belt slowly over her stomach and lightly over her chest. “Give me your hands.” She placed them in front of me. I slowly looped the belt around them and pulled them above her head, securing them to the headboard. I wanted to feel her hands on me but I couldn’t. I couldn’t let anyone touch me. It would hurt too much in the absence of their hands. “That’s better” I whispered in her ear. I trailed tiny kisses down her jaw as gooseflesh followed. My mouth found hers quickly. This I could allow myself. Her tongue pushed back against mine and my hips involuntarily bucked against her in response. I had her right where I wanted her and she had me.
I slid my hands lower, pushing at her jeans, careful to leave her panties in place. Not wanting to push too much too soon. I thought of the fact that I didn’t give her a safe word. I didn’t want to scare her. If she told me to stop, I would, without hesitation. I lowered myself, kissing my way down her chest, paying special attention to her hardened nipples. She began panting, her chest rising and falling hard beneath my lips. “Shhhh…” I whispered against her causing gooseflesh under my breath. I slid my hand lower, rubbing over the delicate fabric of her panties. She melted under my touch. A deep moan escaped her throat. I stilled immediately. “I warned you.” I smiled as she looked pained, longing for me to touch her again. I lifted myself off her. “Roll over.” I commanded but she didn’t move. “Now!” I hissed. She flipped over onto her stomach. I slowly slid her jeans over her hips and threw them across the room. My hands had been aching to touch her again. I slid my hands over her bottom as I struggled to not come at the very sight of her. I allowed my fingers to dip between her legs causing her breath to hitch. As she took another breathe I brought my hand down across her backside. She shrieked at the sudden contact. “Shhh…” I warned her, testing her. I brought my hand down again. She didn’t make a sound and I couldn’t help but smile proudly. I rubbed over the pink mark and kissed it gently. I swatted her one last time. She remained silent. I leaned over her and whispered in her ear. “Good girl” I unzipped my jeans and pulled them off, anxious to be closer to her. “Now you get a reward” I lowered my body onto her, placing myself between her legs. I pushed against her and to my surprise her body pushed back into mine. “You want me?” I asked, hardly able to speak.
“Yes” She panted and my hips flexed against her.
“Yes what?” I needed to hear her say it.
“Yes, Sir” She moaned. I had to pull back from her. I wouldn’t be able to stop myself from finishing if I didn’t.
“Not yet.” I replied as I forced myself to leave her. She tugged at the belt that bound her hands. “Rollover” I commanded. I didn’t hesitate this time. I rolled back over to face him. I waited for the shock to wash over her as she gazed upon me naked, stroking myself. “Spread your legs” I commanded. She slowly moved her legs. “Wider” I yelled, a little harsher than I intended. She did, her eyes never leaving my hand. I searched her eyes for any sign of fear, any sign of regret. There was none.
I crawled over her, positioning myself between her legs. I rubbed over her panties, mirroring the action of my other hand. She pushed back against my fingers. Her eyes closed. I began to quicken my pace. “Look at me.” My voice was low and came out as a growl. She gasped but didn’t make another sound. I leaned in and brushed my lips across her inner thigh. She squirmed beneath my lips. I held her legs in place as I moved my mouth along her panty line. I slid them to the side and slowly began to tease her with my tongue. Her body arched and pushed back against me. I slid my finger inside of her, preparing her for me. I continued to work over her with my tongue as I moved my finger more rapidly. As her hips steadied their rhythm with my finger, I slid another inside of her. I could feel her walls tightening around me as her sweet juices filled my mouth. Her body shook below me as pure pleasure swept through her. I withdrew, licking the juices from my fingers as I crawled up the length of her body. “You taste amazing. I want you to taste how amazing you are.” I kissed her hard, forcing my tongue inside her mouth. I knew she would resist but I didn’t care. In here, I was in charge. In here, it was my rules. She struggled against my mouth as she pushed against me. I grinded my hips harder against her. She bucked against me, now returning my kiss, forcefully. I looped my fingers in her delicate yellow panties and pulled, causing them to tear apart in my fingers. I pressed against her, letting her feel me at her entrance. I kissed her, moving painfully slow. Her body tensed around me. I held still waiting for her to relax a little more. I kissed her slowly, tenderly until I felt her grow more at ease, slowly rocking her hips towards mine. “Harder?” I asked, not wanting to hurt her more than I knew I would. If not here in the bedroom, then later when she realized what kind of man I really am.
“Yes” She moaned, arching her bottom into me. I pushed again and again until I was fully inside of her. She tugged on the belt and I was glad I had secured her tightly. I suddenly stopped, stilling myself inside of her as I caught my breath. I pulled out of her as confusion washed over her face. I grabbed a condom from my side drawer and made quick work of putting it in place, wanting desperately to be against her again.
“If I get too rough you need to let me know.” I warned her. She bit her lip and nodded, but I needed to hear her say it. To make sure she understood. “Answer me!” I commanded. I pushed against her, teasing her.
“Yes, Sir” She moaned. I couldn’t control myself as the words spilled out of her lips. I entered her fully, needing to feel her around me. I reached between our bodies, rubbing her, desperate to feel her walls tighten around me again. It didn’t take long. She bucked against me as I kept pace, wanting to ensure she was pleased. It occurred to me that it had been a very long time since I had put someone else’s pleasure before mine. She tightened around me and I pushed harder, finding my release in time with hers.
I collapsed onto her, reaching up to lazily untie her hands.
Chapter Thirteen
I pulled myself off her and began pulling on my jeans, running my hands through my hair. What had I done? I allowed myself to steal a glance at her. She lay sprawled out on my once white sheets, rubbing her wrists gingerly. The small spattering of crimson marring the vision of an angel. I grabbed her clothing and tossed them to her, not wanting to look at what I had done any longer.
I grabbed the small torn piece of fabric that was once her panties and slipped them into my dresser. I left the room without glancing back at her. She deserved better.
I poured a drink and swallowed it quickly, running a hand roughly through my hair. I sickened myself. Just as I was wallowing in my own self-pity, two delicate arms wound th
emselves around my waist. My stomach turned at the intimate contact. I wanted to apologize to her, to beg her forgiveness but the words wouldn’t come. “Don’t” was all I could manage.
“Did I do something wrong?” She asked. Her words cut through me. How could she think she did something wrong? What kind of fucking monster was I? I couldn’t breathe. I drank down another shot. My mind raced as my body grew numb. “I’m going to go. I don’t live far from here.” Her voice muffled in comparison to my own thoughts as I cursed myself.
The next sound I heard was the sound of the front door closing and Emma was gone. It was the middle of the night and I was so wrapped up in my own misery that I let her leave.
Without a second thought, I chased after her. I got in my car and made my way down the main road. It took only a moment to see her, a perfect fallen angel walking amongst us unworthy humans. My headlights creating an angelic halo around her. I hated myself for prowling after her. I told myself it was for her. It wasn’t safe for her to be out at this time of night. The truth was, it was less safe for her with me.
“Get in” I yelled but she began to walk faster. “Get in” I called out again.
“Fuck off” She yelled at me, her face full of disgust. I slammed the car into park, my anger beginning to boil over. I jumped out of the car, wearing only my jeans. She stopped, looking at me as if I scared her. I should. “Leave me alone!” She pushed passed me. I clenched my fists and went after her.
Honor Thy Teacher (Honor Series) Page 4
