I put my arms around him. “I didn’t mean to lead you on like that. I mean I wasn’t. I wanted it. Really wanted it.”
“It’s okay, baby.” He kissed my hair. “Trust me, I want you just as bad. But let’s take this slow.”
I pushed against the hard wall of his chest. “See, I don’t want to. I kind of want to get it over with.” I held up a hand in a stop motion. “That didn’t come out quite the way I mean.” I took a long breath. “There are parts of me that feel like they might explode if I don’t—”
He chuckled. “Get it over with?”
“Yes.”
“Do you want me to make love to you right now?”
“Yes.”
“Are you on the pill?”
“Um, no. I didn’t really have any cause until tonight.” I flipped a hand toward him in a flapping motion. “Don’t you have a condom in your wallet or something?”
He laughed again and then coughed a little. “No. But I’m embarrassed to say, I probably have some in the glove compartment of the truck.”
“Then go get them,” I ordered.
“No.” He put his hands on his hips.
“No? What, you’ve decided you no longer want to get in my pants?”
He frowned. “No. I want to make love to you, Kira, until you can’t think of anything but me. But I’m not going to do it tonight.”
“Why?”
“Because you are a virgin for one, and I’m not going to take something so special away from you without knowing the reason why.”
“Huh?”
“How did a woman who looks like you manage chastity all these years?”
I sat down in the recliner again and pulled my knees to me. “Oh. It’s not as difficult as you seem to think. Not everyone sees me the way you do. To be honest, for years my life has been about school, work, and work. Not much time for dating. I don’t believe in one-night stands. Maybe I’m naïve, but I think there should be at least some emotional connection between two people before they have sex. I’m not saying love and marriage, but a connection.”
“I know from talking to Sam that you dated in college.”
“Oh, I’ve had dates, but I never met a guy who made me feel like you do. Someone who makes me burn inside. And I do burn Caleb, but only for you.”
I’m not sure what it was I said, but the next thing I knew he’d scooped me out of the chair and kissed me hard. “You’re going to kill me, woman,” he said as he put me down on the ground.
I smiled. “What a way to go.”
He laughed. “I don’t have the willpower to say no to you again, Kira. If you want me, I’m yours.”
Mine. “Go get the condoms, Caleb, and bring more than one.”
He was out the door in less than two seconds. I heard him running down the steps. A few minutes later he raced back up.
“Did you lock the front door?” I asked as he paused on the second floor landing to catch his breath.
Panting, he pulled something out of his pocket and nodded. Six condoms in red Trojan wrappers rolled down.
I smiled. “Six? You must be better at this than I ever imagined.”
“You have no idea.”
Minutes later we were under the large quilt in the bedroom, naked and staring at one another. I’d made him turn around while I took off my clothes and slipped under the covers.
“I’m a little scared,” I admitted. I was feeling exposed even though my naked body was covered. I’d also seen parts of him that suddenly seemed very large and overwhelming.
The back of his hand rubbed the side of my cheek. “This is how we are going to do this: If at any time you want to stop, we will. No matter what. I mean it. We won’t do anything you don’t want to tonight.”
I nodded.
This time when he kissed me it was tender and soft. He moved his mouth down my neck, and when he used his tongue to make tiny circles around each breast, my nipples stood at attention and something burned at my core.
As he teased and taunted my breasts, his hand slid down my stomach, and when he touched the slick heat below, I gasped.
He stopped and looked up. “Are you okay, baby?”
“Yes. Don’t stop.”
His tongue went back to work, as did his fingers.
My breathing quickened and I lost myself in the passion. All I could feel or think about was him. Everything blurred and spun out of control. When I screamed, it surprised me so much that I stilled in the middle of the most incredible experience I’d ever had.
“Breathe, Kira,” Caleb whispered in my ear. He nibbled my earlobe and sucked in tiny bits of it. The tension built again and my body exploded.
“Please,” I begged him.
“What?”
“Make love to me, Caleb.”
“I am, baby.”
“No.” I reached down and took the hardness I’d felt against my thigh. I slowly rubbed my thumb over him.
This time he was the one who gasped.
“I’m barely holding on, Kira. Don’t do that too much.”
I smiled. The power of his desire made me feel strong.
“I need you.” I slid my hand down and touched him again.
“Okay, okay. Let go, or I’m going to ruin this for both of us.” He chuckled, but it was a husky, sexy sound.
I let go, and he moved over me. Pausing only to slip on the condom, he kissed me and wrapped my legs around him. “God, you are amazing.”
He slid inside me a tiny bit. I could feel the stretching and I knew the pain was to come, but I didn’t care. My body wanted him badly.
I squeezed his butt with my legs and shoved him inside me. As he pushed through a tight barrier, the intense pain passed quickly.
“Kira!” He stopped. “No, baby.”
“It’s okay.” A tear slid down my cheek.
He started to pull out. “No!”
“It’s good. It’s really good.” I shoved my hips against his. “Please.”
We found a rhythm. It started slow and built into a beautiful crescendo of passion. Just when I didn’t think I could take any more, my body a mass of overstimulated nerve endings, he drove me over the edge one more time. My breath came out in gasps, as if I’d been running a marathon, and then he came over the cliff with me.
He kissed me over and over again, whispering his love. My body shook with emotion. I had to hold back the tears I knew would worry him.
“God, why did I wait so long?” I whispered.
“You were waiting for me.” He slid out of me gently.
“Yes. Yes I was.”
He moved to rest beside me and pushed the dampened hair away from my face. “You are the most beautiful woman I’ve ever met.”
I remembered the pictures of him with the elegantly dressed women. Why do I have to think about that now? I must have frowned, because he leaned down and kissed me.
“Stop. Whatever it is you’re thinking, Kira, just stop. You are it for me.”
He knew me too well already.
I sighed. “I wanted to know, um, when could we do it again? According to all the books and magazine articles I’ve read, and there’ve been a lot of them, it takes at least forty-five minutes.”
“Oh, really.” He laughed. “Well, not everything you read is true.” He kissed the side of my neck. “One look at you with that satisfied smile, and all I can think about is making it happen again. And again.”
“I thought that kind of thing only happened in romance novels.” I ran my fingers through his sandy-colored hair.
“Oh, I’m going to show you some romance.” He kissed me again and I was lost.
* * *
Five Great Things About Sex
The fantastic feeling
The kissing
The orgasms
The intimacy
The glow
* * *
Chapter 21
Deep into that darkness peering, long I stood there wondering, fearing, doubting, dreaming dreams no mortals eve
r dared to dream before.
“THE RAVEN”
By Poe, Edgar Allan, 1809–1849
Call #: F-POE
Description: lv (unpaged): ill; 25cm
I woke with Caleb’s arms and one leg wrapped around me.
I felt like a captured woman, as if he didn’t want to let me go. I loved it.
I’d read so many books, seen so many movies with love scenes, and nothing compared to what I’d experienced the night before.
Sliding out so as not to wake him was difficult. I managed, or at least thought I had. As I reached for my robe, a hand touched my thigh.
“Where are you going?” His voice sleepy, his eyes were opened only a crack. He was sexy as hell.
“Shower, and to start some coffee.”
“Want to share?”
“The coffee? Sure.” I grinned.
“The shower.”
My head dipped. I’d never taken a shower with a guy. It was one thing to be all sexy and exposed under the covers, quite another in the light of day.
“Baby, don’t be shy. You’re gorgeous. I just thought it would save us time for other things.” His bold stare made me blush.
Those other things put me behind almost forty-five minutes and left me exhausted. I’d have to take a nap during my lunch hour or I wouldn’t make it through the rest of the day.
He left a little before eight. Feeling powerful, I donned one of my Armani suits and four-inch Pradas. I spent most of my days sitting behind the desk answering questions for patrons and callers, so the shoes weren’t as impractical as they seemed, and they made me feel good.
That loving high lasted until I opened the library. Everyone who walked in gave me a strange stare. It was as if they knew everything I’d done upstairs.
The gossip mill had obviously noticed that Caleb’s truck had been parked in front of the library until almost eight this morning.
Around ten, I caught an elderly gentleman staring at me oddly. I decided I just didn’t care anymore. It was the twenty-first century and what happened between Caleb and me was our business. The rest of the town could stick it.
The older man kept peering at me from around the rows of books.
“Can I help you?”
Turning, he looked behind his shoulder.
“Sir.” I rudely pointed at him. “Can I help you?”
“Well, yes. As a matter of fact I’m looking for a Western, written by a fella named Jimmy Butts, but I didn’t want to interrupt you. I didn’t know if you could see me.”
I smiled, sorry that I’d been so cranky. He was probably shy. I checked the computer. “We have several. Is there one in particular you wanted?”
He nodded. “I missed Brotherhood of Blood if you have it.”
I walked to where the book was shelved. We had several of the paperbacks, and I handed it to him.
“Name’s Hornsby.” He gave the book back to me to scan. I picked up the wand and put the scanned book on the counter.
“You’re all set, Mr. Hornsby. You have a nice day.” I smiled. He was a nice guy. I shouldn’t have been so rude to him. I just couldn’t figure out why he was looking at me that way.
“Thank you, ma’am.” He tipped his cowboy hat and faded away.
I’d just seen a dead guy.
Thankfully, no one was in the library. It was early for lunch, but I needed a break. I locked the front doors. When I turned around the library was full of people. And a dog. The one I’d seen earlier.
The people waved.
I leaned back against the door.
Something told me these weren’t my normal library patrons. The temperature had dropped twenty degrees.
A woman appeared in front of me. Well, I use the term “woman” loosely. It was actually a drag queen. She/He had to be in his early thirties and wore a beautiful green dress that looked very Jackie O. A black wig flipped on the ends, a pillbox hat, and three-inch pointy-toe heels finished the outfit. “Hi, Kira. I’m Terry.” He held a tiny white dog or an end of a mop. It was hard to tell.
“Hi.” It was more of a squeak than anything. “Are you a—um.” I couldn’t formulate words. This situation was beyond bizarre.
“A drag queen? Yes, darling, I am.” He struck a glamorous pose.
Coughing, I held up a finger. “I was going to say ghost.”
He chuckled. “That too. Though I’m more fond of ‘spirit.’”
“Nice dog.”
Terry gave the pooch a squeeze. “Isn’t he just the cutest? We call him Rascal. He’s actually a pal to Herman over there.” He pointed to the large Irish wolfhound. I’d looked up the breed after my experience the other night. “Poor Herman’s just been beside himself with worry. He didn’t think you were ever going to invite him in. Rascal has been keeping him company until you came into your powers.
“Anyway, doll, I’m your spiritual guide. Or one of them, actually. You’ve been assigned three.”
“Three?”
He sat primly on the table closest to the door and crossed his ankles. “Oh, yes. I’m sure the others will be along when you’re ready.”
I nodded. “I’m hallucinating. I think I should probably call my doctor.”
He laughed again. “Oh, honey. You aren’t hallucinating. I know this is bit disconcerting, as you could only hear us before. I’m sure it’s frightening to wake up and see us this way. But it’s your second week here and that’s what happens. We try to ease you into it a little at time, but the schedule works the way it does.”
“Schedule?” My brain wouldn’t function. I wasn’t a hundred percent sure, but I had a feeling a mob of dead people stood before me.
“Yes.” He smiled and his feminine black hair bobbed around his face. “They’ve all been waiting weeks to check out books. See, they can’t do it without your permission. It’s against the rules.”
I raised my hands and squeezed my head, closing my eyes as I did so. It was a pose that would rival Edvard Munch’s painting The Scream. When I opened them everyone was still there. “I need to sit down.”
“As I said, it’s difficult to understand. This library is a portal. We’ve been trying to point you to the book of rules, but it seems to have been misplaced.”
There was a tsking sound behind Terry.
He gave them the evil eye. “It’s not Mabel’s fault she was called before her actual day. She had things as ready as she could.”
I looked up at the ceiling and then back down to him. “Let me get this straight. You’re dead and you want to check out books?”
He smiled sweetly. “Yes, exactly. Or at least they do. I’m your guide, here to answer any questions you might have.”
Oh, I had a lot of questions. “Why are dead dogs hanging around the library?”
Terry smirked. “Honey, you find out you live in the middle of a magical portal, and you’re worried about your pets?”
“I don’t have any.”
“Don’t follow you, doll.”
“Pets.”
Laughing, he put Rascal on the floor. The little mop ran to me and whined at my legs. I picked him up and he snuggled into my arms.
“Looks like you do now. The animals are guardians chosen specifically to protect you. They’ll let you know when shadows or demons are around or if there’s bad energy in the room.” Terry patted Herman on the head.
I shivered. “Demons?”
“It’s all in the book, honey. It’s a portal, so most anything can come through. You protect the portal, and the library. That’s your job.”
I squeezed my eyes shut one more time. This was one elaborate hallucination. They were still there when I opened them again. Darn.
“I don’t understand why you need a librarian. None of this makes any sense. I know I keep saying that, but it doesn’t. And you can’t just take the books, I have to give them to you?”
He nodded.
I took a deep breath and blew it out. “Why?”
Perplexed, he stared at me. “Why, what?�
�
“Why here? Can’t you just go to any bookstore or library and get what you want?”
“No,” the crowd mumbled in unison.
Terry held up a hand. “You guys behave. The dead must always be respectful of the living. We come here because you are the librarian. There are only a few like you, who can see us. And as you might have guessed, this is no ordinary library.”
I chewed on my lip. Over the last two weeks no one had asked for a piece of information or a book I couldn’t find. I’d spent a lot of time in libraries in college, and none of them had been as well stocked as this one.
“It’s…a library for the dead?”
“And the living,” he added.
“Oh, my.” I sat back in my chair.
“You really need to find the book. It explains everything. Poor Mabel is still in holding, but I know she’ll be here to help out as soon as she can. Though she isn’t one of your guides.
“Unfortunately, she was taken on the wrong day. Someone up there”—he pointed toward the ceiling—“is dyslexic with numbers. So this whole thing was one big mess, since she was to have until the first of January to make this happen. It will be straightened out once Mabel is processed.”
“Processed?”
“Yes. It’s in the book. Now, I know you’re busy, but maybe some of them could go ahead and check out their novels. You let Mr. Hornsby.”
“Um. Okay.” I waved toward the library. “Just take what you want.” And go away.
“Oh, they can’t do that.” Terry jumped off the table. “You have to use that little wandy thing. Otherwise it’s like stealing.”
My head throbbed at the temples. A migraine was on the way. I didn’t get headaches often, but this promised to be a big one.
“It’s the energy in the room—too much all at once for you, until you learn to channel it,” Terry said.
“What?”
“You’re rubbing your temples and feel a headache coming on. I’m afraid that’s from us.” He turned. “Some of you will have to wait until later. Those of you returning books can stay. The rest will have to go for now.”
Like a Charm Page 15
