by Selena Scott
She’d left for a good reason and now she was just trying to make the best of it. “Tell him to give me a call. And otherwise, I’ll see him on Friday.”
Milla sighed. It was such a strange answer for her whimsical, light-hearted sister to give. So practical. But she didn’t push. “How’s everything in NYC?”
“Good. I had a great day at work. And we got this new racerback bra that you would love. Made for curvy girls. And comes in fire engine red.”
“Gimme gimme.”
“I know,” Inka laughed, though it wasn’t something she’d probably ever wear. She paused for a second and wasn’t quite sure why. “I have to go in a second so I can order some takeout. I’m having dinner with your neighbor again. And a movie.” Inka paused again, sighed. “Put your eyebrows away, Milla.”
Milla laughed, because Inka had been right, her eyebrows had climbed straight into her hairline. “I’m just saying, Inks. That’s like the fourth date with this guy.”
“No! No. It’s not dates, really. He’s really nice. And he smells really good. And I like the way he walks around. All lopey. But we’re not dating. He’s not my type.”
Milla narrowed her eyes, decided to set the trap. “Yeah, I never thought he was very handsome either.”
“He’s very handsome!” Inka play-scowled into the phone. “You tricked me.”
“That I did, sister dear. Are you sure you don’t have a crush?”
“I’m sure.” Inka was 99% sure. She thought of him showing her the falcon’s nest. The way he’d leaned against the window. The wonder in his eyes while peeking at the great bird. Okay. She was 90% sure. “Look, I gotta go, okay?”
“You got it.”
Across the state, in Green Mills, New York, Milla hung up the phone and then crossed the living room of her brother Ansel’s house into the kitchen. Ruby, Ansel’s partner, sat at the kitchen table. She was carefully rolling out pie crust.
“Hey!” the cute, curvy little redhead said as soon as she saw Milla walk in. “Will you get this hair out of my face? My hands are all floury.”
Milla did as Ruby asked and Ruby studied her face. “Is everything alright with Inka?”
Milla sighed and plopped into a chair. She played with Ruby’s cup of tea, turning the handle this way and that. “I really don’t know. She left for some reason that she won’t tell us. And I know it’s bothering her. Maybe even scaring her. And now she’s all wrapped up in this guy.”
“Excuse me?” Ansel, the oldest and largest of the Keto siblings, stood stock still in the doorway to the kitchen. Kain, the youngest brother, just as handsome if not more so, pushed past him.
“You heard her,” Kain teased Ansel. “Inka’s got the hots for some guy.” Sex was not a taboo topic for Kain. He enjoyed it immensely and thought everyone else should, too. He thought a healthy sex life was a good thing. He hoped his sisters had that, even if he didn’t really want to hear the details.
“Inka has hots for a man?” John Alec, Milla’s husband, also pushed past Ansel. “Who is this man? Can he be trusted?” His plain face twisted into suspicion, his brow furrowing. Milla pulled him down for a kiss that ended with her being lifted off the chair and installed onto his lap as he sat down.
“That’s a great question,” Ansel agreed, crossing the kitchen to kiss Ruby along her neck real quick. “Who the hell is this guy?”
“His name is Matt Woods. He’s my neighbor in the Manhattan apartment. I don’t know. He’s a nice guy.”
“He’s… kind of a nerd,” Kain decided as he pulled up Matthew Woods’s Facebook page and studied some of the pictures.
“Well, he IS a scientist.”
“Ah. But then how do you explain all these links to porn he has on here?” Kain asked innocently.
“What?!” Ansel snatched the phone only to toss it back with a scowl when Kain burst out laughing.
“Just joking.”
“Honestly,” Ruby said. “Inka’s a big girl. And she’s dated men before. She can handle herself.”
“Hey!” Ansel held two palms up to his ears. “I don’t want to hear that about my sister!”
Milla raised an eyebrow. “Ansel, are you under the impression that your sisters are virgins?”
“Ah!” Now he covered his eyes as well, as if he needed to block this information with all his senses.
“Ruby is right,” John Alec decided. “Inka went away and we need to let her have her own life.” He thought for a second. “And if he turns out to be a dickhead, we’ll beat the shit out of him.”
“Fair enough,” Kain and Milla said at the exact same time. They grinned at one another and then even harder when Ruby piped in.
“You guys think that’s the solution to EVERYTHING.”
CHAPTER THREE
Movie nights became a regular thing. As in a four-days-a-week thing. Friday through Sunday Inka was back in Green Mills. But pretty much if she was in Manhattan, she and Matt watched a movie together. And everything was becoming much more comfortable between them.
Both in their movie choices (Clueless, ConAir, Speed, Grease, etc.) and in their seating arrangements. Inka had always been a cuddler, and it had caused problems for her in the past. Her male friends inevitably got the wrong idea after she’d throw her feet on their laps or mess around with their hair. It was something that Kain had had to explain to her over and over again.
“Inks,” Kain had laid it out for her. “If you touch a guy, he notices. Even if it’s light. Even if it doesn’t mean a thing. Dude is g.o.i.n.g. to notice.” He’d actually inserted the pauses between each letter. And she’d taken it to heart. It wasn’t like Inka wanted to make things awkward or really confusing with people she cared about.
But she was so far from home. Every night she worried she’d have the dream. And Matt? Well, Matt was the best. So smart and thoughtful. He never made her feel dumb, the way so many people in her life did. In fact, he made her feel smart. He laughed at all her jokes. And he let her change the topic when she didn’t want to talk about something. What more could a girl ask for in a friend?
So when movie nights started to get a little more comfortable–a shared water glass, one blanket over both of them, him nodding off between scenes–well, she analyzed it. Was she sending Matt the wrong message when she undid the buttons at her wrists? Or when she’d needed him to zip up that purple turtleneck dress?
No, she’d decided. Because it was different with Matt than it had been with other male friends. With other male friends, she was snuggling up to them because she was Inka. With Matt, she was snuggling up to him because he was Matt.
Safe and quiet. Analytical, smart and sweet. He was better than a full night’s sleep. Safer than a deadbolt. She got closer and closer to him because simply knowing him was one of the best things she’d ever felt.
Those nights together were some of the greatest of either of their lives. As simple as they were.
It was the only thing that really could have torn Matt away from his work, this close to a breakthrough. The idea of snuggling up to Inka Keto on a couch while she wore bright blue slippers and ate her fourth yogurt of the night was way too much to pass up.
And it wasn’t snuggling exactly. But it was… definitely something. He would have bet his savings account that it was something.
He’d stopped sitting at the edge of the couch and always sat close now. If he ran his arm along the back behind her, she’d lean her head back, her knees pulled up to her chin. If his feet were propped up on the coffee table in front of them, so were hers, and they would touch from hip to ankle.
One night he’d worn a hoodie and she’d taken the strings in her hands, toggled them around the entire movie.
And one night, his favorite of all, she’d fallen asleep during Home Alone, her cheek pressed into his chest and her hand balled up in his shirt. That was the night she’d come back at 1 am. She’d already gone home and fallen asleep. She’d woken him up with her knocking, asking to watch another movie.
He was sure she’d dreamt of something that had scared her.
It was right around then that Matt had realized how very hard Inka Keto was to know. For as open and kind and whimsical as she was, the woman was shut tight like a steel trap. He knew she had two brothers and a sister who lived ‘back home’. Wherever that was. He knew Milla had a husband. And that was it. The end. A big old whopping that’s-all-she-wrote.
Anytime he asked her a question it was met with some sort of joke or non sequitur or even a good old fashioned topic change. The woman was apparently a master. And he thought she was so adorable, he’d let it go on for two whole months.
It was that that he was thinking of one Tuesday afternoon when he was jogging home from the park. He realized that if he cut over a block or two he could pop in and see her at work. She’d invited him before, and maybe it would be good to see each other out of the context of her living room. He knew it would be good for his own sanity to see her in a professional setting, instead of all warm and peachy and swallowed up in a blanket.
He jogged the rest of the way there. His run would be a good excuse to not have to stay too long.
Of course he banged his head against the bell on the door as he walked in. Just. Of course. He was rubbing at the sore spot and looking around for Inka when he realized how dumb this idea was.
He’d known, intellectually, that Inka worked in a lingerie shop. But the physical reality of that was just now setting in. He was surrounded in every direction by lacy little scraps of this and that. Mesh underthings designed to make a man pour coffee into his cereal. He felt a hot, slithering something work its way up his back.
“Yeah. No. Big mistake,” he muttered to himself as he took a step backwards.
“Matt!” Inka came bounding from the back of the store, her hair perfectly spic and span and her taupe shirt tucked into navy blue slacks. She looked nothing like she usually looked and Matt could still have eaten her on a cracker.
“Ah.” Yeah, that was the best he could do. Inka Keto was surrounded by underwear in every direction. Sue him.
“Did you come to visit me?” she asked. And then she visibly dimmed. “Or did you come to buy something for someone?”
Matt buoyed. Okay. That was good. She wasn’t wanting him to buy lingerie for another woman. That was something. That meant something. He gestured at his running clothes. “I was out for a run and I thought I’d say hi.”
Her face lit up like the Eiffel Tower and Matt jammed his hands in his pockets. “That’s the best! I love seeing you out and about. Okay. Well, I can’t take a break right now, but you can stand with me while I fold.”
Matt looked in horror down at the pile of satin… things that Inka had motioned toward. He could do this. He could totally do this. Not be a mumbling moron while Inka folded satin underwear in front of him.
If he died young, they might as well just write down this moment as cause of death.
“Sure, sounds great.”
She beamed at him and shook out a midnight blue thong, deftly folded it up and put it in its place. He gulped.
“What, ah, do you want to have for dinner tonight? If, of course, that is, if you want to have it with me. I don’t want to assume. I just thought, you know, following the pattern of other nights, that we’d probably be eating together again.”
She eyed him over a pair of pink lace panties that had–gulp–snaps on the crotch. “Of course we’ll have dinner together. Are you alright?”
“Oh, yeah. Of course!” He leaned on one hand, willing himself to be cool for just one second, realized that he’d knocked over a pile of push-up bras, and just folded his hands under his armpits.
“Maybe sandwiches?” she proposed. “From that deli you were telling me about? Do you think they deliver?”
Matt repeated the word ‘deli’ in his head fourteen times before it registered as English. Right. The deli on 57th street that he liked so much. He dragged his eyes away from the yellow, satin, fairly demure underwear she was neatly folding. Yellow looked good on her skin. “They don’t deliver, but I’ll pick it up for us.”
“You don’t have to do that!”
“No, really. I wanted a longer run anyways. I’ll run there and take the train back. It’ll be easy. I swear.” He was only vaguely aware that he was backing away from her.
“I’m gonna take you at your word.” She warned him. “I’m willing to take advantage of people’s kindness when a good sandwich is at stake.”
“It’s no problem. I’ll see you at home around seven.”
And then he was out the door like a shot, just ducking the bell this time.
Inka watched him go. Her lanky friend who was all big feet and wide shoulders. She smiled as she watched him jog down the street, jumping to the side to dodge a stroller barreling toward him. She’d turned back to her folding when it hit her, what he’d said.
The word ‘home’ sprinkled down on her little by little, like snowflakes.
***
Matt thought about Inka the entire run down to the sandwich shop. And then he thought about her the entire train ride home. And by the time he walked through his front door, he’d gone and worked himself right up.
He’d replayed that moment in the lingerie shop, where she’d deflated, about 700 times. She hadn’t wanted him to buy lingerie for another woman. That had really happened. It was real.
He slammed the sandwiches onto his counter and strode into the bathroom, ripping his clothes off one by one. There was no reason this had to be so confusing! All he had to do was ask her.
The thought of talking to her about this thing between them made his stomach tighten, but that was normal. After all, he was a mortal and Inka Keto was a goddess of the highest degree. The most gorgeous woman on the planet and cute to boot. Anyone would feel a little anxiety about laying himself on the line.
But he’d made up his mind to do it. And by the time Matt was out of the shower, teeth brushed and sweatpants riding low, he was actually feeling pretty juiced. Whatever her answer was, it would be okay. The important part was telling her. Living in this weird, cuddly limbo was going to put him into an early grave. Not to mention, whatever this thing was that he had for her was seriously preventing him from meeting anyone else. So, in one sense, he more than owed it to himself to do this. He even owed it to his mother.
No. Nonono. That was not the right train of thought, he admitted to himself as he stepped out of his bedroom shirtless, scraping the towel over his hair.
He froze and so did Inka, who stood ten feet away in his kitchen. It was 6:30. She was half an hour early.
“Oh!” Her voice was breathy. “Sorry. I didn’t mean to intrude.” She held up the bag of sandwiches. “I was hungry.”
Her eyes bounced all over him, taking in his low sweatpants, the dusting of hair on his chest.
“No, that’s totally fine,” he said as he took a few steps forward, tossed his towel over the back of an armchair. “You know you’re always welcome here.”
He expected her to reply but she just stared at him. And kept staring at him.
Well, now or never.
“Inka?” he asked as he closed the distance between them. She’d thrown her hair up in a messy bun and now wore yoga pants and a T-shirt with all the planets on it that read ‘need more space’. He resisted the urge to chuckle at it and instead focused on those green, green eyes. When he was two feet away from her, he froze, jammed his hands into his sweatpants pockets and held her eyes. “Do you find me attractive?”
Her mouth opened and closed. Her eyes were so wide, so honest, and so unreadable. Matt thought it was perhaps the first time he’d ever seen her speechless.
“Wait a second.” He held up one hand. “That’s actually not the way I want to start this conversation.”
He took a deep breath and ran a hand through his dark hair. Her eyes landed on his exposed armpit and then across his chest. He wasn’t sure if that was a good sign or a bad one.
“What
I really want to say is that I think about you all the time.” He didn’t step forward so much as shift forward. “I think you’re hilarious and unique and I never know what you’re gonna wear. Also, you’re tongue-rolling-out-of-the-mouth pretty. Crazy pretty. It, ah, makes me nervous.” He took a real step this time. “And I was just thinking. That if you, at all, felt the same, then I’d really like to know that. And if not? Then, that’s cool, Inks. I’ll need a little time to get over, you know,” he lightly pounded one hand over his heart and Inka’s eyes dropped there. “But we’ll be fine. I promise we’d be fine.”
She stared up at him still. His blood screamed through his veins and his hands tingled. Telling someone you had feelings for them was intense. He felt like he could have lifted a Cadillac. Meanwhile, her face was so blank it was starting to freak him out a little bit.
“Ah. Inka?” He didn’t want to push her, but a little prompting was necessary for his very sanity.
“I—um.” She brought one hand up and roughly scratched her head, her bun bouncing with her fingers. Her eyes ricocheted from his face to his chest and everywhere else in the kitchen. And then she licked her lips.
If she hadn’t licked her lips, Matt might have written this off as a loss. But there were those plump lips, shiny from her tongue. And he knew that he had a chance. He just knew it.
“Alright.” He held up both hands. “I’m gonna take that response as an indicator that you’re not totally sure, one way or another.” He paused. “Which, for the record, I’m gonna be filing as a win. Considering… all that.” He waved in her general hot-ass direction. “So in lieu of you answering my other question, I’m just gonna ask one more.” He took a deep breath, but the pause was more for her than it was for him. He felt great. Better than he had in years.
“Do you object, in any way, to a little experiment? Where, at the end, you might better understand how you feel about me?”
There was a beat of time, which might as well have lasted a year.
“No,” Inka spoke, her voice raw and featherless. “I don’t object.”
