by Sherry Soule
“Poison,” I murmur, feeling too weak and lethargic to move.
Dammit. She’s sedated me with that cursed toklians plant. The realization feels like a stab to the gut. My heart rate kicks into hyperdrive.
The twisty plot of this real-life horror story thickens.
The Lancasters will never accept me. My boyfriend’s mother wants me dead. And now I’m going to vomit on her designer shoes.
FRIGHT NIGHT BABBLE
Greetings, Fellow Horrorphilas!
This annoying cliché needs to be dropkicked into outer space. Why do horror filmmakers overuse mirrors as a spooky prop? For instance, the character stares into the mirror and when a ghost appears in the reflection, the character screams or looks again, and it vanishes. Dumb!
What if the ghost screamed back? Teenage acne can be horrifying.
Or those lame scenes where the character opens the medicine cabinet, and when they close it, there’s always a sinister figure standing behind them.
Seriously, who goes into the bathroom and doesn’t lock the door? Come on. Am I the only one with a brother that can probably solve cold fusion, but can’t remember to knock?
How about a dumb character that enters a carnival funhouse filled with mirrors because they’re hiding from the villain. Hel-lo? It’s a room with mirrors! Meh.
If some screenwriters had an ounce of creativity, they’d write a horror scene in a swimsuit fitting room. ’Cause those mirrors are really horrifying!
Peace, love, and horror flicks,
Sloane
THIRTY-FIVE
Dizziness assaults my senses and the breath is stolen from my lungs. “Why the heck are you trying to hurt me?” I rasp. “This is unforgivable!”
“Hmm, poor Sloane,” Mrs. Wickedly Evil Lancaster says. “You’re looking extremely pale.”
“It was always you,” I accuse, my voice a whisper. I struggle to move my sluggish limbs, but it feels as if there’s an anvil sitting on my chest. “You and Delta put me on that island.”
“The Lancasters have always known their place in Meleah society.” She clucks her tongue. “A pity you never did.”
“So you admit it?”
Mrs. Lancaster towers over me with one eyebrow lifted. “You are such a mutant.”
“Touchy.” I roll my eyes. “Next you’ll be spouting, no wire hangers, ever!”
Even with my defiant snark, my veins slowly fill with dread. All this time, Mrs. Lancaster—my future mother-in-law—was the mastermind behind all the attacks and poisoned drinks. Mommy Dearest is the vacation sabotager!
Sheesh, talk about matriarchal malevolence.
“I can’t believe it’s been you the whole time,” I say. “Hayden will never forgive you for this.”
“In time, my son will forget you and become the great leader he was born to be. But he can’t do that with a lowlife shalinaya by his side. He needs a young woman of notability and good breeding.”
Her motives go far beyond psycho-bitchiness. She’s ambitious and ultimately villainous. Lying here drugged and helpless, I feel like Paul Sheldon in Misery and Mrs. Lancaster is cray-cray Annie Wilkes. Her brand of mothering takes her domineering to a seriously dark and creepy place.
“Was Neela in on it, too? Did the two of you conspire against me?”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Mrs. Lancaster tugs at the cuff of her long-sleeved silk top. Even under her flawless makeup, I can still see the crazy written all over her face. “I hope you’re not the smart one in the family. Did you swim too long in the shallow end of the gene pool?”
“You’ve never approved of my relationship with Hayden,” I say, the cold stone floor chilling my back. “And now you’re poisoning me with that damn toklians plant!”
She laughs, the sound hollow. “You have quite the imagination, don’t you? Hayden said you wanted to be a writer.”
“Why are you doing this?” I ask, stalling for time.
Jonah might check on me at any second. Viola and my mom will be back soon. All I have to do is stay alive.
“Sloane, really.” She steps closer and sighs. “Why do you persist? You’ll never be good enough for my son.” Her velvety tone changes, becoming abrasive, like a slap. “And all my problems would have vanished if Sector Thirteen hadn’t been so damn incompetent. I left that anonymous tip about your family with General Athens after Hayden told me you were a shalinaya, in the hopes that you’d all be locked up and mind-wiped. Problem solved! However, you have an annoying habit of ruining all of my well-made plans.”
“Gee, I’m sooo sorry,” I snap.
Her outright hatred deflates my self-worth like a popped balloon. It feels like my body sinks deeper into the floor as I stare at the ceiling with tears trickling down my cheeks. Hayden’s mother was the one who’d turned my family into ST and almost got us all killed that evil she-devil!
I blink. “Um, do you mind repeating that?”
“You are not worthy of marrying into a noble family,” Mrs. Lancaster says impatiently, as if I’m as dim as a burnt-out lightbulb. “I’m just doing what needs to be done.”
Damn. Her maternal instincts are seriously out of whack.
“Blah, blah, blah.” I grind my teeth. “That’s what I thought you said.”
“I think I’ll run you a bath now.”
“You’re insane. It won’t erase the side effects of the toklians plant.”
Standing over me, she gives me the evil eye and I give it right back to her.
“Silly girl, why would I want that? Surely if you took a bath with that poison in your system you’d drown.”
“I’m not taking a bath! And don’t call me Shirley.”
“Oh, yes, you most certainly are.”
Mrs. Lancaster goes into the adjoining bathroom. The sudden rush of water in the tub makes my lunch threaten to cough back up.
This whole time I’d been putting the Lancasters’s feelings before my own happiness. So worried I would be breaking up Hayden’s family and ruining their relationship if we were a ‘real’ couple. Well, boo-freaking-hoo. I just want to climb into a time machine, go back, and give myself a good hard slap.
I’ve had it with her superiority crap. Mrs. Lancaster has repeatedly ripped apart my self-esteem, making me feel worthless, and it worked. I let those negative perceptions about myself and doubts about Hayden pile up like a heap of unwashed laundry. Closing my eyes, I quit crying, and quieted the criticizing voice in my head by telling it to shut the hell up. I won’t let others determine my self-worth anymore—others as in Mr. and Mrs. Snobby Lancaster or Nasty Neela.
Dissolving that fear of inadequacy feels liberating. I am so totally good enough for her son! Believing I wasn’t seems so ridiculous when I consider how truly amazing I am—loving daughter, loyal friend, cool sister, and awesome girlfriend. Who the hell is she to convince me otherwise?
That self-serving Mommy Dearest had me thinking I was a piece of subhuman garbage, but I no longer need validation from Mrs. Lancaster or her husband. Sure, I might need therapy in ten years and suffer a nervous breakdown after all the crazy I’ve been through, but I will delete the old programming installed in my brain full of self-doubt because I actually dig myself. I’m a wicked cool person and I have a wonderful family and amazing friends. Hayden and his folks would be lucky to be a part of my life.
Now I just gotta live long enough to tell Hayden how much I love him and want to be his wife someday, with or without his parent’s blessing.
Mrs. Lancaster returns to the bedroom and stands near my head. I worry she’ll kick me in the skull with her stiletto like a bowling ball. “Let me help you up—”
“Stay away from me!” I find the strength to scoot back the tiniest bit. “Why didn’t I see it sooner? You must’ve had Delta spook my equestroxian. Then you rigged my Water-Glider to malfunction. And you even shoved me off the yacht, but when I survived, you and your freakshow daughter kidnapped me.”
My pulse quickens. I’m st
ill too sedated to move my limbs. When I try to scream for help, my voice sounds gruff and whispery.
Mrs. Lancaster’s cold expression doesn’t flicker. “Well, a quick death is much too good for you. And now I’ll have to take matters into my own hands,” she says, advancing on me. “Now please stop uttering such nonsense. Someone might overhear your delusional ramblings.”
“I’m not delusional,” I say, glaring at her. “You’ve had Delta repeatedly spike my drinks with the toklians plant so I couldn’t teleport. I’m going to tell Hayden everything you’ve done.”
“Oh, really?” She sneers. “You’ll never have a chance to tell anyone anything…especially if you’re dead.”
A red-hot fire slashes through my chest cavity. “If I die, then my parents will know it’s you. My mom just left us alone together.”
One of the cool things about movie villains is that they often get the best lines, but also those horribly long-winded rants. So I half-expect her to give me the Scooby-Doo villain speech.
“If you weren’t so meddlesome, I wouldn’t have to resort to such drastic measures, now would I? But don’t worry, I’m no stupid comic book villainess, who tells the heroine her evil plans.”
Huh. I’m starting to get used to the wanna-be killers in my life uttering grandiose tirades. Mrs. Lancaster is certainly not the average villain in her light-colored designer clothes and flawlessly coiffed hair. If I didn’t have to hate her guts, I might find her brand of crazy interesting and even deem her a credible threat.
“It won’t work because you’ll be the only suspect.”
“Not if I leave a suicide note about you not being able to take it anymore,” she says through her teeth.
From the corner of my eye, something moves out in the hallway.
Please let it be Viola or Hayden, and not Delta.
“No one will believe that.”
She chortles, her laugh sounding high and shrill like a loon—a loony-tunes. “Poor Sloane, her depressed emo-side wouldn’t let her cope with the harsh realities of this new alien world and so she ended her life…” Her smirk fades. “I’ll leave to make a snack and when I return, I will discover you’ve drank poison and drowned in the tub. There was nothing I could do to save you. It’ll be a tragic yet fitting end to your pathetic existence.”
I glance at the doorway of the bathroom. The swish of rushing water filling the tub echoes like a waterfall throughout the bedroom.
“Seems you have the whole thing worked out, and since I only have a few moments left,” I say. “How did you talk Neela and Delta into joining the dark-side?”
“Oh, Neela couldn’t hurt a fly. She’s all bark and no bite.” She waves one hand in the air. “But my daughter was easily talked into helping me get rid of you.”
It was Mrs. Lancaster and Delta all along. I’d wrongly accused Neela. A sharp pang hits my breastbone, the guilt spreading like a virus to my heart. My accusations were unfair and untrue and almost started a witch-hunt. Now Neela is blameless and being interrogated for crimes that she didn’t commit at a Zeta police station. Well, not entirely innocent, she does have the lethal tongue of a serpent.
Mrs. Lancaster drags a manicured hand through her hair. “Delta is extremely loyal, although I had to embellish a bit.”
“Embellish what?” I croak. k12
“I had to tell her that if Hayden married you, it would hurt the family and Hayden’s chance at leadership. It worked out perfectly because now Neela won’t be implicated and she’ll be free to marry Hayden next year. I do love a spring wedding, don’t you?”
“It will never work.” My body twitches and I’m able to touch my throbbing temple with a shaky hand. “Everyone will see right through your craziness, lady.”
“No!” She squats and puts her face close to me. “That’s impossible! No one could possibly outsmart me. Now let’s get you into that tub.”
Before I can even process all the lunacy, she lunges at me and grabs my ankles with both hands. I scream as she drags me across the floor. I pathetically struggle against Mrs. Lancaster, but she’s freakishly strong. She gets me to the doorway of the bathroom, the blast of gushing water thundering in my ears. That loud cascade, in the otherwise quiet house, sounds like the background soundtrack to my impending doom.
THIRTY-SIX
I scream again, and Jonah comes running through the door of the bedroom carrying what appears to be a mallet in his hand. He jumps into the air like a basketball player making a dunk shot and crashes it down on the back of Mrs. Crazy-Pants Lancaster’s head. The blow causes her to crumble onto the floor, lying facedown and not moving. Blood seeps from the wound, matting her bleached hair.
Jonah stands there, heaving for breath. My brother drops the weapon at his feet, which turns out to be a marble sculpture, and reaches out a hand to help me sit up. The effects of the toklians plant are starting to subside and feeling slowly returns to my limbs. I lean against the side of the bed, and he sprints into the bathroom to turn off the faucets, then comes back to sit on the floor beside me.
“Hayden’s mom tried to kill me,” I say, staring down at Mrs. Lancaster.
“I heard everything and I will inform the Zeta authorities,” Jonah says. “It’s going to be all right now.”
I sniffle. “Where’s Mom?”
“Everyone’s outside,” he says. “Mom sent me to check on you.”
“Who’s everyone?”
“Yeah. All our friends are here, including Hayden. I’ll go get him and explain what happened to the others. Wait here.” My brother, my savior, hurries out the door.
Within minutes, there’s a commotion in my room. My friends, my mom, Zeta cops, and even four GB leaders. Viola sits beside me and puts an arm across my shoulders.
Hayden is out in the hallway speaking with my dad. My heart pinches. I have no idea what to say to him or how this is going to affect our relationship now.
Two of the GB leaders lift Mrs. Lancaster off the floor and revive her. They put handcuffs on her and teleport out of the room.
“I can’t believe Mrs. Lancaster tried to kill you,” Viola says.
“Well, believe it,” I say. “Her and scary Delta.”
Viola’s shoulder brushes mine. “At least Delta turned herself in and confessed everything after Hayden and Zach confronted her. Still, their own mother…”
“I’m hungry. Mom? Where’s my cheeseburger?” I ask.
My mom dumps a sack of food on the bed and I tear into it. I take a big bite of the burger and savor the taste. Near-death experiences can create quite an appetite. Nothing like comfort food to ease the ache in my soul.
“So all this time it was Mrs. Lancaster?” Tanisha says as she hands me a napkin from the bag. “Neela had nothing to do with it.”
“I feel bad for blaming her,” I say, swallowing a bite of cheese. “She was mean to me, but not murderous mean.”
As if on cue, Neela bursts into my room, shoving people aside, followed by Zach and Rost.
“What the hell is going on here?” Neela asks, her eyes wide and her yellow sundress crumpled.
“Why are you lying about Mrs. Lancaster?” Rost asks, getting right up in my face. His spittle lands under my right eye. Ack! He spits while he rages, not even apologizing. “Do you want to destroy every royal Meleah family?”
I wipe the spray off my cheek. So gross. “Sheesh, could you say it and don’t spray it?”
Rost growls. “Shut it, Cyclone Sloane. Your lies are hurting the Lancasters.”
“Back off. That crazyass woman tried to kill Sloane!” Viola barks, standing and shoving Rost away from me. “We can prove it, douchebag.”
Everyone falls silent.
A female Zeta cop steps into the room, wearing a dark blue jacket with a nametag: Darwi, over the standard jumpsuit. Her indigo hair frames her oval face and her onyx gaze swings from me to the Voorhees siblings. “Neela and Rost Voorhees?”
Rost steps in front of his sister. “Yes?”
�
��Your mother wants you home right away and to distance yourself from the Lancasters,” Darwi says. “Mrs. Lancaster has grudgingly confessed to attempted murder after some coercing and will stand trial.”
“Omigod.” Neela says, her face draining of color. “It can’t be true!”
Rost shakes his head. “No. That’s not possible. They’re bluebloods. Royalty!”
“It’s best if you do as your mother requests and go home,” Darwi says firmly. “Your presence is unwanted here.”
Tanisha snorts a laugh and Zach gives the siblings a harsh glare. Rost teleports out of the room with a grunt.
Neela stands there a moment breathing heavily. Then she strides over to me with tears lining her eyes. “I’m sorry for being so bitchy towards you, Sloane. You didn’t deserve it. And what Delta and Mrs. Lancaster did was so wrong!” She tightly hugs me like a python squeezes its victims, and it is twenty seconds too long, and now it’s getting awkward.
So. Much. Personal space invasion!
“Okay, okay.” I unwrap her arms and push her back.
“Goodbye, Sloane. I hope you and Hayden are happy together.” Neela teleports in a hazy blast of purple luminosity.
An uneasy silence claims the room. So strained and heavy, it feels like the quiet is struggling to bust out the closed windows. I gaze at everyone, my stare landing on Zach who’s bottom lip trembles.
“My mother actually confessed?” he asks, tears rimming his eyes.
“Yes, she has, and she will be dealt with accordingly,” Darwi says, then leaves the room.
“This can’t be happening,” Zach says, his voice quivering.
Viola stands and tries to hug him, but he pushes her away. Without another word, he ducks his head and teleports from the house.
As much as I’ve disliked Zach in the past, my heart goes out to him. It can’t be easy to find out your mother is an attempted murderer. Not to mention she coerced his adopted sister into helping her kill his brother’s girlfriend.
