by Donna Fasano
“Don’t,” he said, gently cutting her off. “You never made me feel anything I didn’t want to feel.”
But she refused to acquiesce. “I’ve teased you about your job as a life guard, Brad. And I shouldn’t have.”
“And I’ve teased you,” he insisted, “about practically everything. It’s what we do. It’s how we are. It’s what works for us. If others don’t like it, tough.” He stared at her for a moment. “Right?”
She wasn’t sure what this meant. It sounded like he was willing to let their relationship go on as it had. Or it could mean he only wanted to keep parts of it.
“So.” She tilted her head as she drew out the word. “Does this mean we’re okay?”
He smiled, and her insides began to do that odd butterfly flutter.
“Of course, we’re okay,” he told her. “We’ve always been okay, right?”
“The way you keep asking,” she murmured, “I’m not sure you’re all that sure.”
The sound of his low laughter set off a chain reaction in her body. Her pulse throbbed to life, her breath quickened, her temperature notched up a degree.
“You know me too well.” He offered her one of the golf clubs. “Come on. Let’s play a round.”
“Of putt-putt? Gosh, I feel like we’re back in high school, Brad,” she teased, but she took the club from him.
“We can play and… talk a little bit.”
She narrowed her eyes. “Why does that plan make me a tad suspicious?”
“That’s probably a healthy thing.”
He led her through the leafy hedges onto the course.
“You go first,” he said. “I’ve already teed up your ball.”
“Well, now weren’t you confident?”
“Actually, I was,” he admitted softly.
Cathy loved this playful banter. It made her feel impish. Sexy. Wanted. Brad was good at it. An expert, actually, and that’s one of the reasons she loved him. She found his confidence appealing. She loved that he could show such self-assurance yet never come off as cocky.
“The truth is,” he told her, “the course was just completed today. I wanted you to be the first to tee off.”
Syrupy sweet emotion filled her chest as she straddled the ball.
“Don’t expect much,” she warned. “I can’t even remember the last time I played.”
She looked down the green at the hole and made a mental measure of how hard she should swing. She tapped the ball and then held her breath as it traveled along the alleyway. The ball rolled straight for the hole, but slowed to a crawl. It hovered on the edge, but then dropped out of sight with a satisfying thunk.
Cathy let out a shout of triumph and jumped onto the balls of her feet. Brad reared back his head and laughed.
“That is unbelievable!” He took two giant steps and enveloped her in a hug.
He smelled like a summertime walk in the woods. She knew it hadn’t been all that long since they’d touched, but it felt like a lifetime.
“It’s got to be good luck, right?” he asked. “For the arcade, I mean. This is a sign that things are going to go well.”
“I hope so.” She went to retrieve her ball while he teed up.
“Listen,” he said as he eyed the ball and the hole to line up his shot, “my mom asked me a question about our relationship that had me doing some heavy duty thinking.”
“You talked with your mom about us?”
“My dad was in on the discussion, too.” He hit the ball, and it rolled toward the hole, stopping several inches short of its goal.
“Well, they overheard you say you were never going to marry me.” He lined up his second shot. “I had to tell them something.”
“I guess you did.”
Brad tapped the ball and it dropped into the hole.
“I told them about the on-again-off-again thing we have going,” he continued. “And how I continued to go along with it even when I wanted more out of the relationship.”
He bent and picked up his ball. He straightened, his blue eyes latching onto hers. “Mom asked me why. Why, she wanted to know, would I go along with a thing like that if that’s not what I wanted. So I started thinking. It took me days, but I think I’ve got it worked out.”
“Oh?”
“You’re up.” Planting his hand at her lower back, he gently guided her to the tee area of the second hole.
Cathy positioned her ball in the small painted circle.
“I was willing to give you the time you needed,” he said. “Time to celebrate your newfound freedom. Time to enjoy your friends. Time to clear out the residual impact of your ex. Shake off the dust, so to speak.”
“There was a blanket of dust,” she muttered.
“You needed time to restore your confidence. And reconnect with, I don’t know, who you are and what you want. Divorce does a number on people. You needed to come to terms with any betrayal issues or abandonment issues you might have.”
It took her four attempts to get the ball into the hole, and then he moved into position at the head of the green. With his focus on the ball, he said, “You needed time to re-establish your sexual sovereignty.” He waggled his head as he added, “And I was happy to help facilitate that whenever you needed me.”
Cathy groaned. “Please tell me you didn’t tell your mother that last bit.”
“I didn’t tell her any of this. She merely asked the question, and she left it up to me to figure out an answer. But it turned out to be a good exercise, don’t you think?”
He whacked the ball and it skidded along and dropped neatly into the hole.
She raised her arms and yelled out. “Whoa! We both have a hole in one.” She twisted her mouth to the side. “Maybe we should stop now.”
“No way,” he told her. “We have to keep going.”
Cathy stepped onto the third green.
“Where was I?” he asked.
“You proclaimed my need for sexual sovereignty.” She pointed her club at him. “Which, I might add, you have facilitated expertly.”
“Thank you.” He offered a small bow of his head.
Looking down the curvy alleyway, Cathy said, “I think I might need some help lining up this shot.”
Brad moved behind her, reaching around her to slide his hands overtop hers on the club. They straddled the ball, and Cathy arched her back, shifted from one foot to the other, which made her bottom wiggle a little.
She grinned and glanced over her shoulder. “Is that a trophy in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?”
His breath was warm against her neck as he released a sexy chuckle. “Cathy, I’m trying to be serious here.”
“You’re trying to be something,” she teased.
He planted a kiss on her jaw. “Try to focus, would you?”
“Yes, sir.”
“So as I was saying,” he continued smoothly, as he helped guide her swing. “I think what I’ve been doing is giving you the space and the time you need to overcome your past, to feel empowered, to learn to trust yourself and others—meaning me, hopefully—so you can leave the past behind and be fully present when we’re together.”
Cathy smacked the ball and watched as it hit the side wall twice before disappearing into the hole. She squealed like a gleeful toddler, dropped the club, and spun to face Brad. She hopped into his arms and wrapped her legs around his waist. He cupped her bottom, and she pressed her palms on either side of his handsome face.
“This is so fun!” She smiled at him. “People are going to love this place.”
Then she kissed him, hard; his mouth was warm and wet and tasted faintly of mint.
She pulled back and gazed deeply into his eyes. “You are an amazing man. You’re smart, funny, and sexy as hell. If there wasn’t traffic whizzing by out there, I’d rip off your clothes and have my way with you right here. You’re just what I need, Brad Henderson. And I love you. I think I’ve loved you for a long, long time.”
Appreciation gleamed in
his azure eyes.
“But don’t think for a minute that you have me fooled. Residual impact, betrayal and abandonment issues, restoring self-confidence.” She snorted. “Re-establish sexual sovereignty? There is no way you came up with that crap on your own. You’ve been googling. Hard. Admit it.”
His mouth quirked at one corner and he quipped, “Like I said, you know me so well. That’s one of the reasons why I love you.”
Cathy slid out of his arms, their gazes remaining connected, growing more somber.
“I know we don’t say that often enough,” she confessed. “That’s something we should work on, maybe?”
“Definitely.”
Earnestness leveled her tone even further. “Brad, I need to know… are you really okay with us not getting married? Are we on the same page here?”
He gave an easy nod. “Kind of.”
She stared at him until he physically placed his hands on her shoulders and turned her around.
“Go get your ball. It’s my turn.”
Cathy should have known something was up when he didn’t move to tee up; he just stood there watching her. She cast a suspicious glance at him as she made her way toward the far end of the green—and she promptly ran into something dangling from an overhead tree branch. Sure it was a spider or some other creepy-crawly, she let out a squeal and batted the air.
“Bug!” she cried out when she felt it hit her a second time.
“It’s not a bug.” Brad jogged toward her, laughing. “I’m sorry. It wasn’t supposed to happen like that.”
“What wasn’t…?” She stopped and went still while he reached to free whatever had become entangled in her hair.
“Does anything we do happen like it’s supposed to?” she asked.
“Not very often. But that’s why we’re so good together, right?”
“Why do you keep doing that? Turning your statements into questions.”
“Don’t move. I almost have it,” he whispered. “I keep asking because I want you to feel like you have a say. I never want to make you feel, um, trapped.”
If he hadn’t told her not to move, she’d have swung around and hugged him tightly. He was too sweet for words.
“Like this bug stuck in my hair?” she teased.
“I was thinking more along the lines of how you felt… when you were with your mom. With your grandmother. With your ex. I never want to make you feel… confined.” His tone lightened as he said, “Like I told you, it’s not a bug.” He pulled away. “Here.”
Her eyes went wide when she saw the object in his fingers. “A ring? An engagement ring?” She inched backward. “Damn it, Brad—”
“It’s not an engagement ring.”
The blue stone glistening in the sunlight caught her attention, and she blinked. “It’s lapis.” Her voice went soft and a frown bit into her brow.
“The jeweler told me that lapis has healing qualities,” he said. “It’s thought to boost self-confidence and inner power.”
“You think I need more of that, do you?” she murmured. Her bewilderment over why he was giving her a ring must have continued to shadow her expression.
“Cathy, I need some sort of commitment from you. I’m not talking about a marriage certificate. But I do need something that signifies we’re a… thing. I don’t need a vow.” He tilted his head. “But I do need a promise.”
“This is a promise ring?” She stood there a moment, and then she fought the smile that tugged at her mouth. “We are back in high school, aren’t we?”
“Stop,” he said. “Don’t make fun of me.” But then he grinned too, shrugging. “I thought it was a good idea. For both of us. Am I being stupid?”
She shook her head. “No. You’re being romantic.” Then she lifted her hand, palm up. “Give me the ring,” she groused. “If you need a promise, I’ll give you a promise.” She slipped it onto her finger and took a moment to look at it.
“It’s beautiful,” she told him.
The intense blue of the square semi-precious stone was flecked with gold and polished to a high-gloss shine.
“When I came home like a whipped puppy,” she said, “my grandmother kept assuring me that, eventually, everything would be okay. That the divorce would be hard, but there would be a better life for me afterward. That I wouldn’t be alone forever. I wasn’t so sure because, well, I felt so damned broken, you know? But Grandmom kept on insisting. Months later after she’d passed and I ventured out for the first time, I’d found a card she’d given me. She’d left me a piece of very good advice. ‘Fall in love when you’re ready, Cathy,’ she’d written, ‘not when you’re lonely.’”
Thoughts wrapped around her like a velvety cloak, soft and warm, and when she finally lifted her gaze to Brad’s, she saw that his eyes were filled with emotion too.
“Because of you, I haven’t been lonely,” she told him. “Because of you, I feel like I’ve been put back together, that my jagged edges have been filed down, smoothed over.” She smiled into his handsome face. “Because of you, Brad, I’m more than ready to fall in love. And I guess that’s a good thing because you already have my heart.”
“I’ll take care of it.” He cupped her jaw in his palm. “And that’s a promise I intend to prove.”
He slipped his arms around her and pulled her to him, and Cathy knew that, although the love they shared might be unconventional, it was forever.
Epilogue
Late afternoon sunlight cast a golden autumnal glow across the sand. Ocean waves offered pleasant background music. A warm, light breeze fluttered the gauzy fabric that decorated the pristine white archway that had been planted in the sand. A lush flower arrangement sat on the small table that had been positioned under the arch. White folding chairs were lined up in two short rows, but few of them would be in use as most of the attendees would be participating in the ceremony in some way.
Cathy lingered on the apex of the dune, watching the street for guests to arrive, glancing occasionally at the lovely ceremonial set up waiting on the beach, and taking every opportunity to admire her bouquet of white roses and daisies. Just as she buried her nose in the lusciously scented flowers, Brad came up behind her. His lips were warm and possessive on her neck, and a delicious shiver coursed along the curve of her shoulder.
“Jack says he’s ready,” Brad murmured against her hair. “All he needs is the bride and groom.”
“He did a lovely job of decorating.”
“With the hundreds of beach weddings he’s planned over the years…” Brad planted another sweet kiss on the top of Cathy’s bare shoulder. “He could get the job done with both hands tied behind his back.”
“Hmm.” Distracted by the silky touch of his lips on her skin, by the brush of his warm breath on her temple, she leaned her head to the side, offering him more. And he didn’t disappoint her. Her nipples budded to life, ached to be touched, and she slowly filled her lungs with salt-tinged air and dragged her eyelids open. “That feels wonderful.”
She could feel him grin against her neck.
“Are you sure you’re not going to break out in hives today?” he asked.
Cathy turned to face him, reaching up to encircle his neck with her arms. “Hives?” she asked, kissing his chin lightly and pressing her breasts against his chest.
His hands at the small of her back, he pulled her closer until their naughty bits snuggled, separated by mere layers of fabric.
“You know,” he whispered, and then tilted his head to indicate the arch and makeshift altar that he and Jack had arranged out on the beach. “The wedding.”
“Ah.” Her brows rounded. “I’ll be fine. It’s bridal gowns I’m allergic to, not bridesmaid dresses.”
A couple hours later, Cathy stood back from the happy group, taking it all in. Sara and Landon’s wedding had been simple and perfect. From the moment she’d arrived, Sara had radiated sheer bliss. Her white, full-skirted sundress struck her at mid-calf, and she’d traipsed along the sandy aisle unapo
logetically barefoot. She’d never looked more beautiful. Emotion had moistened her eyes as she’d spoken her vows. Geneva looked lovely in her mother-of-the-bride dress, and she beamed with happiness as she’d sat holding two-month-old Aaron. Like the perfect little cherub he was, the baby had slept through the whole affair. Landon’s sister and brother-in-law had flown into town with their two children to attend the ceremony, and judging from their broad smiles as they congratulated the newlyweds, it seemed that their family troubles had been worked out.
Heather looked stunning, more from sheer joy than anything else, as she and Daniel huddled near the decorated arch. Mia’s shyness hadn’t kept her from performing her duties as flower girl; now she hovered near her father and Heather, her chin lifted with pride, her now-empty basket hanging from her arm.
Seeing Sara and Heather so happy filled Cathy’s heart near to bursting. Those two women meant the world to her. They were her family. Her sisters-of-the-heart. The three of them were comfortable together, in good times and in bad, in the chatter of everyday life, and even in life’s more quiet times. She loved them, would move heaven and earth to help them, and she knew they would do the same for her.
And then Cathy’s gaze landed on Brad as he walked across the sand toward her. The suit he wore accentuated his golden good looks. His gorgeous smile and perfectly positioned dimples left her utterly breathless, but it was his patience and his understanding that won her trust and captured her heart. She loved this man, deeply, intensely, profoundly. He was everything she needed and more. It might have taken her a while to figure it out, but he was truly the love of her life.
He reached out and tipped up her chin with a gentle touch of his index finger and kissed her—a silent token of his affection—and she held his gaze for a long moment, in answer. It was a move that had become a habit over the weeks that had passed since she’d accepted his promise ring. Every time she looked at that ring, she grinned. The piece of jewelry was the perfect representation of their relationship, serious and intimate, yet also light and fun and playful.
“I think they’re ready to head up to The Lonely Loon for champagne,” he told her.
