Someone Like You
Page 9
Sometimes Lizzie forgot there were people who didn’t know her history. It had been a long time since she’d met someone new who didn’t have the Lizzie Blake story as part of their collective memory. It was so much safer to live in a place where people knew but had forgotten, so she never had reason to dredge up the memories or the heartache of her past. She hadn’t had to explain it to anyone in years, had locked the pain away in a place that still hurt to look at. So she didn’t.
But there was something about this man next to her, holding her hand in the darkness. The mysterious confidence she’d been trying to find welled in her at that moment, fluttering in her stomach and lifting her shoulders. Would the truth scare him away? Would finding out make her seem desperate and clingy? Would he think of her as the loneliest girl in Middle Point?
She decided to open the door to her past. But only a crack. She would only tell him what he could easily find out if he were curious enough to ask anyone else in town. She knew he’d been through his own private hell. Would that make him understand hers?
Lizzie felt a familiar weight across her chest. ‘My beautiful nanna died when I was ten. Joe left for Sydney when I was fifteen.’
Dan stopped and Lizzie took two steps before she caught up with that fact. Their arms were stretched out between them but he didn’t let her go. He must have guessed there was more.
Lizzie reached deep inside for the truth. ‘When I was twenty, mum died of breast cancer. I cared for her for the last six months of her life and she died in our house.’
Dan pulled her close, so they were face-to-face, almost body-to-body in the dark, the wind the only thing in the small space between them. She looked directly up at him and he saw the challenge in her eyes.
‘Jesus, Elizabeth.’ He fought the sudden urge to pull her into his arms, comfort her, settling instead on resting his other hand on her shoulder, gripping tight through the cool cotton of her shirt.
She took a deep breath. ‘It’s quite the sob story, isn’t it?’
‘And this brother of yours, Joe. Did he come back?’
‘When he could. For the funeral.’
And then Dan knew why she’d never looked at him with pity. She would know better than anyone he’d ever met that it didn’t help someone who was suffering. It turned you in on yourself, made you want to push other people away. He reckoned she must have had more than her fair share of sympathetic looks, enough to last two lifetimes. She’d clearly lost so much more than he ever had.
Everything he’d thought about Lizzie was turned on its head. ‘That’s terrible, what happened to you.’
‘That’s what I think too. But that’s life, isn’t it?’ She shrugged and he felt her shoulder shift under his touch. He soothed his hand from the top of her arm, up and down in gentle strokes, to the tender skin of her neck and held it there.
‘Not for everyone.’
‘Shit happens,’ she said and he felt her shiver.
‘That’s a lot of shit to happen to one person. Too much.’ A fleeting thought crossed his mind. Maybe she’d figured out the trick to getting on with life. He wondered if she’d share it with him.
She turned away from him and he dropped his hand from her neck, tracing a line with his index finger down her arm, past her elbow and wrist to her hand. Then he let it go. When she tugged his other hand, he followed her. The way he was feeling, he would have followed her into the ocean if she’d led him there.
‘I think so, too, but that doesn’t change anything.’
He pulled her closer to him and her hip bumped against his thigh. ‘Do you ever ask why?’
She shook her head. ‘I used to. There was a time when it was all I could think about. Then I came to the conclusion that there’s no grand plan or science to any of it. Shit happens because it happens. You can drive yourself crazy and waste so much time if you keep on asking why. In the end, it doesn’t help.’
Bloody hell. Was she talking about him or her?
‘Eventually I figured out that I just had to keep getting up and brushing my teeth.’
‘What?’ Dan couldn’t stop the laugh on his lips.
She smiled back at him. ‘It’s true. If I got up every day and brushed my teeth I knew I was on the way to having a regular day. Sometimes that’s all you can ask for. Not a crappy day or a spectacular one. Just a regular day.’
A regular day. What did that look like now, he wondered, in this new life he was building in Middle Point? So far his days had been filled with retreat, solitude and anger. Wallowing had come naturally, way too easily. He’d been doing too much of it. But tonight, walking along the quiet esplanade with Lizzie’s hand in his, felt anything but regular.
‘So where’s your brother?’
‘Joe lives in Sydney. He couldn’t wait to get out of here. Can you believe he left all this behind? Crazy, huh?’
Before he could reply, Lizzie stopped and turned to face him, a smile on her lips that set his heart thumping.
‘We’re here.’
When he shifted his gaze from her, Dan realised where they were. The rough-hewn sandstone walls of the pub looked grey at night and its single porch light cast a glow over the heavy wooden doors and slate steps. Through the windows they could see a few people inside, locals at their regular spots at the bar. The fuzzy light from a wall-mounted TV seeped through one of the front windows creating a luminous haze.
‘Let’s go around the back,’ Lizzie said, and led Dan down the small laneway to the rear of the old building.
Even in the dark, Dan could see the project coming to life. Dirt and stone crunched under his runners as he walked and, protected from the wind, it felt strangely quiet and peaceful. The place had the familiar smell of a construction site, of dust and gravel and freshly turned earth. He looked around in the darkness and could vaguely make out pallet-loads of paving bricks and recognised the string line edging the area that was to be paved. He looked back over his shoulder to the main building and wondered about power access and what heritage restrictions he might be breaking if he opened up the back of the place with big windows to the kitchen and folding glass doors that could be pushed open all the way in summer. He could see it all coming together in his head, fast-forwarding a month to people and noise and life and community. Lizzie’s plan for the place was perfect and he was helping create it.
‘It’s going to be amazing, isn’t it?’ Lizzie stood in the middle of the empty lot and turned back, her arms spread wide, a smile on her face so content that it floored him.
‘Where exactly do you want to put the trees?’ he asked, taking a few steps to her to get closer to that smile.
‘There, there and…’ she strode over to the north-eastern corner, ‘…here. That reminds me. Did you hear back from the plant nursery?’
‘No, not yet.’ He crossed his arms over his chest and just watched her. Damn it if her excitement wasn’t just a little bit contagious. ‘Where were you thinking for the shade sails?’
‘I thought they might work best on this western side to create some protection where the sun is hottest in the afternoons.’ She came to him, stood by his side. She nudged him with her shoulder, kept it close. ‘What do you think?’
He looked at her face in the dark, found her lips, full, slightly parted. The sexiest mouth he’d ever seen.
I think I want to kiss you.
‘Dan?’
He jammed his hands deep into his pockets. ‘Huh?’
‘The shade sails. Where do you think we should put them?’
‘You’re the woman with the plan. I’m just the hired help with the instant coffee.’
‘Sure you are.’ Her eyes locked on to his. ‘We’re in this together, remember?’
Dan turned to her. ‘Oh, I remember.’
Lizzie blew out a breath and half a laugh at the same time. Dan heard some frustration mixed up in there, too. ‘I promised Ry this would all be done and dusted by Christmas. We’ll get it done, won’t we.’
It wasn’t
a question. It was a statement of intent, words of confidence in him, in the way he worked. Most of all, she was saying something about the way the two of them could get this thing done. Together.
‘Yeah.’ He would make sure of it.
They strolled home, neither wanting the evening to end. Dan didn’t reach for her hand and Lizzie didn’t take his. She dared not touch him again in case she burst into flames. Every inch of her was on high alert and his tender touch had made her feel nervous of him. She tried to keep her distance on the way back, no shoulder bumps, no arm grazes. Nothing that would tip her over the edge.
Finally they reached Dan’s place. Lizzie stopped in front of the green beach shack but Dan didn’t seem to notice that she had. She opened her mouth to call him back, then hesitated. It was only fair she had another few seconds to enjoy the view from where she stood. There was something about his stride, the way his long, long legs carried him as he walked, that totally did her in. God. Now she was getting turned on by the way the man walked.
‘Dan,’ she called. ‘This is your stop.’
‘No it’s not. I’m walking you home.’ He didn’t even look back but he did slow up.
‘That’s totally unnecessary.’
‘No, it’s not. C’mon.’
Lizzie had been walking these streets since she could literally walk. The only threat to her personal safety was the chance of being gnawed by the feral rabbits which bred like…well, rabbits…in the farmland at the back of the point and scampered all over the place at night. But if Dan wanted to be chivalrous, she could indulge him. He was loosening up and she was enjoying being with him. It was as simple as that. They were in on the renovation together and she’d seen the look on his face when he’d looked around the car park. He was starting to think like the old Dan, the one who was used to managing projects a thousand times bigger than a pub car park makeover.
When they reached the pink flamingo house, Lizzie opened the door and stepped inside, reaching around to switch on the light. A flicker of awareness ramped up her pulse. She didn’t need to see him because she could feel Dan right there beside her, his breath hot on the side of her neck as he moved close. She took a deep breath and turned.
‘Elizabeth…’ The word remained half-buried in his beard. His full lips were parted slightly and she could see and hear and feel her name still hanging there.
‘Thanks for the walk home. You’re quite the gentlemen.’ Her hands were on his strong arms to give her purchase and she could feel his muscles bunch and quake beneath her touch. Lizzie was halfway to giving him a goodbye peck on the cheek – it’s what she did with everybody – before she realised the boundary she was about to cross.
There was no going back now. His arms enveloped her, squeezed the air out of her lungs as he pulled her in tight, his mouth on her jaw before she knew what was happening. Her nipples reacted faster than her brain, budding with the feel of him pressed against her, so hard. His heat sparked a fire in her belly and robbed her of any sensible thing to say.
‘What did you call me?’
‘A gentlemen,’ she managed.
‘You got the wrong guy,’ he said roughly as his lips found hers, soft at first, teasing and coaxing. When Lizzie lifted her arms around his shoulders, she searched for the warm skin at the back of his neck and then tangled her fingers up through his hair, black and silky and long on his collar, and gripped hard.
‘Dan,’ she whispered, and that was his trigger to take her, lift her off her feet and tangle his tongue with hers, caressing, kissing and claiming her. His beard was soft against her cheek where she expected rough. Lizzie savoured every move, every sensation, felt alive where every inch of his body pressed against hers, including his erection poking into her belly. God, it had been too long since she’d come across one of those.
Well, hello sailor.
Oh no. The thought bubble inside her head lingered. She tried to burst it, to kick it to the kerb. Think about the way his lips feel, how strong his arms are, how hard that chest is, how sexy that dishevelled hair looks. The eyes that pin you to the spot. Yes, think about his eyes. Think about how long it’s been since someone held you like this. Think about how much he wants you.
Nothing worked. It was there. It was too late to un-think it.
Lizzie giggled.
More than that, she laughed, with his tongue in her mouth and her hands grabbing at his hair. Dan stopped kissing her but didn’t move his lips from hers or let her go.
‘You all right?’ he murmured. The movement of his soft lips against hers felt ticklish and set her nerves jangling in all kinds of new places.
Lizzie laughed again. ‘Yeah…’
He kissed her three times, quickly. ‘I don’t normally get laughs.’
And that made Lizzie giggle even more. ‘Oh, I bet you don’t.’
Dan pulled his mouth from hers but kept one strong arm around her waist, while the other hand slipped down to cup her butt, pull her close.
‘You want me to stop?’ His voice was low and sexy and damn it if she didn’t feel it throb right through her body.
Hell no, she didn’t want him to stop. She’d just realised how long it had been since a man had kissed her. Oh, who was she kidding. She’d never been kissed like that by a man. Or by a man like that. This was knee-trembling, nipple-tightening, heart-pounding, good old-fashioned pashing. With a man who was more than six kinds of handsome. And she didn’t want her nerves to get in the way. She wanted more, so she nudged her hips closer to him so he’d be left in no confusion about exactly how much more she wanted. His erection dug into her and she realised with a hopeful awareness that Dan McSwaine might be getting his mojo back.
‘Dan,’ she whispered. ‘I most definitely don’t want you to stop.’
But he loosened his grip, pulled back even more, then dropped his arms to his sides. He swore under his breath and scratched his beard.
Maybe he hadn’t heard her right. ‘Dan,’ Lizzie whispered, ‘I said don’t stop.’
‘I know. I heard you. But I reckon I should.’
She blew out a big, frustrated sigh and crossed her arms angrily in front of her.
‘Shit, Elizabeth—’ Dan reached over and played with the little wisp of hair that sat in front of her ears, pushing it gently behind.
She batted his hand away. ‘Forget it. Just forget it.’
‘Elizabeth…’
‘Look, I get the hint, okay? You don’t have to do this…this. Whatever this is. Or isn’t.’
‘You’re right. I don’t have to do anything.’
‘Exactly. And I ruined the big moment, so let’s just let bygones be bygones and agree that this—’ Lizzie waved her hand back and forth between them, ‘This is a bad idea.’
Dan rubbed both hands over his eyes and up into his hair, linking his fingers together on top of his unruly mop. ‘If you had the smallest clue about what I’m thinking right now…’
‘What would that be? “Oops? I accidently fell on Lizzie’s face and lucky her lips were there to cushion the blow?”’ She was irritated and tired, frustrated and aching from his touch. Furious at herself for wanting it in the first place. Furious at him for taking it away.
‘For someone so smart you haven’t got a fucking clue.’ Even though they were angry words, there was softness in his voice and in his eyes.
‘Oh yeah? I know exactly what you’re thinking, Dan McSwaine. Something like “lucky” and “escape” probably figure in there somewhere.’
He moved closer, dropped his arms, pushed his body against her. ‘You’re wrong.’
Lizzie didn’t budge. Her lips felt raw, parched from his kisses, and she ran her tongue over them. Dan watched her do it and let out a loud exhale.
She tried again to guess what he was thinking. ‘What about “get me out of here”? Am I getting close?’
‘Nowhere near close. Why don’t you try: You. Me. Naked.’
Dan turned away, stepped outside and called back to her.
<
br /> ‘Oh, I left out a word. Soon.’
Dan felt like a million bucks. He was a man, after all, and his mojo was pretty damn important to him. And he was pretty sure it had returned with a vengeance.
That had to be a sign. When he reached home, his face ached from grinning. And his dick ached too. Also a good sign he decided. Dan junior clearly thought there was going to be a party. But Dan senior had overruled him. For tonight. He wanted Lizzie. Hell, he really wanted her. But there was no way he was going to treat her as if she was someone he’d picked up in a bar. This wasn’t a pick-up in a nightclub. This was different. She was different and he needed time to prepare and plan and get it right because he had a feeling she’d be worth it.
And for fuck’s sake, he really needed a shave.
CHAPTER
9
‘Lizzie! You have been holding out on me. When did all this happen?’ Julia peered over her sunglasses, careful to take her eyes off the road for only half a second.
Lizzie sat in the passenger seat of the sports utility her best friend was manoeuvring through the undulating southern Adelaide Hills, taking in the view to the distant ocean. The further away they got from Middle Point, the less relaxed Lizzie felt. And reminiscing about her night-time escapade with Dan only added unhealthily to the mix of tension in her stomach.
‘I told you, last night. There I am, locking lips with the totally shaggable Dan McSwaine, right there in my living room, his hands on me like he wants to rip all my clothes off. He’s being all handsome and deep and sexy and doing that thing with his eyes.’
‘And?’ Julia demanded.
‘And I screwed it up. The big moment.’
‘Oh no. What on earth did you do?’
‘I laughed.’
Julia giggled, then let loose into a full guffaw. ‘You laughed?’
Lizzie closed her eyes, mortified not only by the fact that she’d had one of the most embarrassing moments of her romantic career, but that she was now reliving it for her best friend. ‘You think I’m making this up? I was trying so hard to be “sex kitten” but I ended up with “girl from Middle Point”.’