by SJ McCoy
Pete pondered that a moment.
“Listen. I've got to go. Get your ass up here when you can, okay?”
“Okay.”
“And, Pete?”
“Yeah?”
“You know I'm right.”
Holly shut down her computer and stared at the black screen. The next time she fired it up it'd all be over. When she came back to the store on Tuesday, she'd no longer be with Pete. There'd be no more lunch deliveries. No more flowers. No nights at his place, by his pool, in his den, in his bed, in his arms. No more quirky smile, no more demanding blue gaze. No more Pete. She blinked, refusing to let the tears come. She'd save them for Monday. Over the last few weeks she'd relaxed into allowing Roberto and the girls run the place. They didn't need her. She was more willing to accept that now. She'd be gone for a long weekend. To Roberto's surprise she'd told him she was taking Monday off, too. She would allow herself that one day to stay home. On Monday she would let the tears come. For one day she'd indulge in all the sadness she felt, grieve for everything that would never be. On Tuesday she'd be back in here. She'd make a start on her life post-Pete.
She was still considering taking the Four Mile project. Trying to convince herself that it was about her career. Not about him. If anything, he had given her a gift. His 'Work like you don't need the money' motto had given her a fresh perspective. She was ready to think bigger, to stop clinging so tightly to the small and easily controlled business that she'd built. She could see now that once she stopped focusing on the desperate need for money, she could expand her horizons and, as he so rightly said, make more of it in the process.
She was starting to think that maybe she could take the project. If it meant she'd see him sometimes... Well, she'd rather have that than nothing at all. Wouldn't she? She shook her head, still undecided. How could she ever move on, forget him, as she knew she must, if she was still living for the chance of seeing him again? She didn't have to decide right now. For now she was going to get back out into the store. Later she'd go with him. Enjoy the wedding. Make the most of the little time they had left.
As she came out of the office, she was surprised to see Laura, whom she'd thought was still in San Francisco, looking at the purses by the window. Laura had her back turned, but her friend, a tall woman with short blonde hair and bright red lipstick spotted Holly and nudged her. Holly grinned and started toward them. The woman turned and Holly realized it wasn't Laura at all. From behind, the long dark hair and tall slender figure had looked the same, but face to face, this woman had much sharper features and, like her friend, was wearing bright red lipstick and a little too much make up.
The red lipstick curved up in a condescending smile. “You must be Holly?”
Holly smiled and nodded extending her hand.
“So nice to finally meet you.” Cool fingers wrapped around her own in a limp handshake. “I'm Mia Sylvester and this is Jade Evans.”
The blonde woman smiled and offered the same lifeless handshake. So, these were the consultants. The tall brunette who stalked Jack, and Jade, the one Pete dated. Holly swallowed at the thought. They were both beautiful, no denying it.
“Welcome to Hayes,” she wasn't about to lie that it was nice to meet them.
“I love your store,” smiled Jade.
Holly looked at the woman who had no doubt shared Pete's bed. Her blood ran cold at the thought. “Thank you.”
“I hear you're going to be helping the boys with their little project at Summer Lake?” Mia raised a perfectly arched eyebrow.
Wow! The boys? Little project? And how had she heard anyway? “Nothing's been finalized yet.” She really didn't want to talk about it with these two.
Jade put a hand on her arm. “If you like, you could partner with us. If it's all a bit daunting for you? I know you've never done anything like this before.”
Holly couldn't think of anything she'd like less.
“We work with the boys all the time,” said Mia. “We could clue you in on what they like, show you the ropes.”
“That's very kind of you.” Kind wasn't the first word that came to mind. Holly's heart raced. She hated thinking that these two might know what Pete liked better than she did. In any sense. “As I said though, nothing has been finalized yet.”
“Of course,” said Mia. There went that condescending smile again. “Take my card and let us know.” Holly automatically took the business card.
Jade smiled, a smile that made Holly want to throw a glass of water in it. “You can always get in touch with me through Pete. I work closely with him.”
Wow again! Message received, loud and clear. Holly smiled, not trusting herself to reply to that.
Roberto appeared at her side. “So sorry to interrupt. Could I borrow you for a moment?” He turned to Mia and Jade, “Do forgive me ladies.” He took Holly by the arm and steered her to the back of the store, leaving the two women staring after them.
“Thanks, Sweetie.”
“I know an ambush when I see one, Holls! Who the hell are they?”
Holly realized she was shaking as she watched them leave. “Ugh! They were a reminder that I need to forget the Four Mile Creek job!”
Roberto frowned. “What have they got to do with it? It'd be a great opportunity for you.”
Holly shook her head. “No Berto. It would be more than I could handle. Those two just served as a perfect reminder of that.” What had she been thinking? She wasn't going to be with Pete after this weekend, but he wasn't going to become a monk. He'd never claimed he didn't date. He just didn't get involved in anything serious. She knew now she couldn't take the job. Couldn't risk seeing, or even hearing about how 'closely' he and Jade were 'working.' No. She needed to cut all ties. Just seeing that woman, thinking about her with Pete, had been like a dagger to the heart. She needed to follow Pete's example and stick to her original plan; enjoy it while it lasted then firmly close the door on it. Forever.
She sensed him enter the store. It was as if her body was so in tune with him that she picked up on whatever vibration it was he put out. She still couldn't see him, but she knew without a doubt that he was here. Then she spotted him, talking with Roberto. She smiled at the unlikely friendship the two of them had struck up. They were deep in what looked like a serious conversation. Roberto gesticulating as he made a point, Pete's brows drawn together, frowning as he listened. Again she was struck by how imposing he was. The stark contrast between the laughing, tickling Pete and the man who stood in her store. Rigid stance, suit she could see was Italian, hand tailored. She'd guess from the cut she knew who'd made it – and how much it cost! The crisp white shirt and bright blue tie set off his eyes perfectly. They were blazing. What on earth were those two talking about?
As she reached them, Pete gave Berto a meaningful look then turned to her with a smile, his handsome features transformed. Holly's heart swelled with love. Wait! What? Love? This was a really bad time to start thinking along those lines! She let herself sag against him for a moment as he wrapped her in his bear hug.
“Hey Bigshot,” she smiled up at him, wishing it was all so different.
“Hey, Sweetheart.” The eyes that smiled down at her held such tenderness.
This was so unfair. She wanted to scream and shout and demand a recount. At the same time, she was a realist. “I'll just get my bag from the back.”
“Are we going straight to the airport?” she asked once they were in his truck.
“No. I need to go home.”
That surprised her. “You forgot something, Bigshot?”
His eyes were serious as he looked across at her. “More like there's something I don't want to forget.”
What was that supposed to mean? “Okay. Are we going to make it to the airport in time or are you just going to stop the universe to suit you again?” She tried to keep up their familiar banter, to stay away from anything serious, afraid to lose it. But Pete wasn't playing, his face was serious, agitated maybe?
“We're
not going to the airport.”
“We're not? But I thought Em wants us there as early as we can.”
“She does.”
Holly looked at him. This wasn't making any sense. She could see that little pulse working in his jaw as he drove.
His voice was low when he spoke. He kept his eyes fixed on the road. “Em does want everyone there tonight, but I told Jack we'd be up in the morning.” He reached over and took her hand, holding it on top of his thigh. “I can't go tonight, Sweetheart. I want to stay here. With you.” He squeezed her hand. “I'm sorry. I should have asked, I know.”
Holly's throat closed up. For a moment she couldn't speak. He probably should have asked, but she didn't care. She had wished they were staying here tonight, too. She wasn't ready to say goodbye to what they'd shared this week. Then again, she never would be.
“I want to stay here with you, too, Pete.” She managed to stop herself before she added, 'forever.'
Chapter Seventeen
Pete pulled up in front of the house and jumped down from the truck. They hadn't talked much on the way back to his place. Just held hands. He didn't know what to say. He simply wanted to be with her. One more night. He opened the front door and let her enter ahead of him, glad they were home. Home. He'd loved this place since he'd bought it. He'd loved it even more these last few weeks. Now it did feel like home. Holly made it that way. Her purse on the counter, her few things in the bathroom. What would it feel like when she was gone? He didn't want to think about it. Tonight she was still here. She was quiet, subdued, but she was here. He followed her through to the den and wrapped his arms around her, wanting, needing, to feel her close. She smiled up at him, but her eyes held a sadness. He closed his eyes and rested his head on top of hers. He hated knowing that he'd caused that sadness. Hated that he felt it too and there was nothing he could do about it.
He heard Jack's voice, 'Fuck the plan Pete!' He'd considered it, long and hard. He couldn't do it though. His whole life had been shaped by discipline, by determination, by damned hard work. By following the plan. He held her tight, his heart echoing Jack's words, his head trying desperately to cling to reason. The doorbell made her jump.
“I'll be back.” He returned with bags full of takeout cartons. “I ordered us dinner from Mario's. That pasta you loved so much.”
She smiled. “Thank you.” She looked like she had so much more she wanted to say, but she busied herself with plates while he opened a bottle of wine. He carried everything through to the dining room.
She raised an eyebrow when he held out her chair. “Formal dining this evening, Mr. Bigshot?” Even the banter was tinged with sadness. It hurt his heart.
“We never got to eat in here.” Damn, why had he said that? She lowered her eyes and said nothing. He'd wanted one last night together, one more night of all the fun and laughter they shared. One more memory. But this wasn't working. The end hung over them too clearly, too close.
She smiled now, making an effort. “Thanks for thinking of this, it's wonderful.”
He put his fork down. The food was wonderful, persuading the Chef at Mario's to allow his food to be placed in cartons and delivered beyond the walls of his restaurant had taken some doing. Pete couldn't taste it though. He reached across the table and took her hand. “I'm sorry, Sweetheart.”
She shook her head, forcing a smile. “Let's not go there, Pete. Please? We wanted one more night together, let's not waste it?” She squeezed his hand. “Tell me something fun?”
He nodded. It made sense. They both understood, already knew the truth of any words that could be spoken. He took a deep breath and launched into a funny story about a conference he'd attended a couple of months back. Soon she was laughing. They were back to their usual banter, the plates were empty, glasses refilled. The sadness lingered in her eyes though, and in his chest.
Pete stood and turned the music on. He offered her his hand, “Dance with me?”
She stood and stepped into his arms, “I suppose we should make sure we're up to scratch for our official duties.”
It took him a moment to realize she was talking about the wedding. He just wanted to dance with her, hold her close and move to the music. He smiled, “I was thinking more along the lines of one of your CEO fantasies.”
She met his eyes as he crushed her to his chest, “Surely there's one about dancing with the CEO?” He ran his hand down her back, “One where you dance with him before he makes love to you on the dining room table?”
“There is now.”
**********
Holly was struggling to hold back the tears. She was lying in his arms, in his bed, in his house, in his life. For the last time.
“Talk to me, Sweetheart?”
She shook her head. He held her closer. She loved being surrounded by, enveloped in the warmth, the power, the presence that was Pete. She didn't want to step back out into the cold little world that was her life without him.
“Say you'll take the plaza project?”
Here it came. She'd hoped he wouldn't want to talk about that tonight. But she'd known he would. And she knew she couldn't do it. Not after seeing that Jade woman today. The thought of Pete with her...
“No.”
She felt him tense. “No?”
“I can't do it, Pete. I have to make it a clean break.” She turned over so they were lying face to face, naked bodies pressed together. His eyes were that deep violet color. She kissed his lips and melted against him as he held her tight.
“Isn't something better than nothing at all?”
“Not for me. I realized that today. It would be torture, Pete.”
His brows came down. “What happened today?”
“I just realized I can't do it, that's all.” He didn't look convinced, but he didn't need to know about her encounter with Jade and Mia, ugh! And their, 'We know what the boys like.' She shuddered.
“Tell me what happened.”
Damn, his eyes were boring into her, demanding the answer. How did he do that? “I saw something that made me understand just how hard it would be to be around you and not be with you. And I'm not prepared to do it, Pete. It would hurt me too much.”
“What did you see?”
She took a deep breath, he obviously wasn't going to give up. “Jade.”
His face clouded, eyes hard now, “I don't want Jade.”
Holly shrugged.
He looked angry. “You've got to know I don't want her. I want you!”
Holly couldn't bite back the bitter little laugh. “Yeah and in your world, according to your plan, that means you can keep seeing her right? But not me.”
“Sweetheart, I can't just see you.”
“No, but you can see her!”
“I haven't seen her in months! What did she say?”
“Oh, Pete, it really doesn't matter. Let's not do this, Let's not spoil what we have left.”
His eyes softened and his lips brushed hers, his mouth soft as he kissed her slow and sweet. He lifted his head. “I want you, Holly. That's why I can't do that with you. It's not enough. I can't offer you what we both want.”
“I know, Pete. It wouldn't be enough for me either. So when we say goodbye, it'll be goodbye.”
He rolled her onto her back and positioned himself between her legs, his eyes intense as he slid inside her, filling her. She brought her arms up around his neck as her body surrendered to him. His mouth came down on hers as they moved together. Tears filled her eyes even as the tension built inside her. He filled every part of her body and soul as he drove into her over and over again until he carried them both over the edge, bodies melding together as he found his release.
**********
She wondered if she'd ever walk on the beach again without thinking of Pete. They'd woken early and made love again. One last time. They'd brought coffee mugs down to walk the beach as the sun came up. In a white T shirt and denim shorts, he was as handsome as she'd ever seen him, chiseled features softened by a wist
ful look, tan skin glowing in the early morning light .
He'd stopped and turned to her. Reaching into his pocket, he smiled. “I got you something.”
She raised an eyebrow.
“Promise me you'll wear it?”
“Perhaps I should see it before I make any promises?” she teased, but she knew whatever it was she would treasure it always.
He held out a flat, black velvet box. As she reached for it he snatched it away, laughing. “You have to promise.”
She laughed with him. “Okay, I promise.”
He put an arm around her shoulders and gave her the box. As she opened it, she swallowed hard. She could not cry. Would not cry. He was watching her closely. It was a bracelet, a much more delicate version of the one he wore himself. She knew what was engraved on it before she looked, 'Work.' She blinked away the tears as she looked up at him.
“Like you don't need the money, Sweetheart.”
She didn't dare try to speak around the lump in her throat while he fastened it onto her wrist.
“It's time for you to spread your wings, Holly. I just wish I could be around to see it. I hope that wearing this will help you, the way mine has helped me. To keep pushing. Keep your eye on the goal. To remember that it's about so much more than money. It's about building your life, not just your business, becoming all you can be.” She bit her bottom lip as he wrapped his arms around her. “And I hope, maybe, sometimes, when you look at it you'll think of me, remember this. Remember us.”
She felt the sob well up and buried her face in his chest, believing she'd never forget this, forget him. They stood that way for a long time before she trusted herself to look up at him. “I'll always remember you, Pete. Remember us.”
He held her eyes, searching them with his own, then nodded, saying nothing.
Chapter Eighteen
It had been such a beautiful wedding. Emma looked sensational. She'd glowed as her Gramps walked her down to the little dock where the gorgeous Jack waited for her to say their vows. Pete stood by Jack's side, looking devastating in his tux. Devastated was how Holly felt and, from the way Pete looked at her, he felt the same.
