He’d wanted the attic converted to a master suite, because he’d wanted the other bedrooms for their children. At the time, Josie hadn’t been interested in babies, but she’d changed her mind on that one. She did want children and she wanted them with Del.
If only she could find the courage to ask him to give her a second chance. To give them a second chance. But she was scared. She wanted to believe that he didn’t mind the changes in her. She wanted to believe he hadn’t meant all the things he’d said about her when he’d thought she was Rose, or that if he had meant them, she’d shown him she was different now. But she wasn’t sure about any of it. Had they both changed enough to make it work this time?
“I don’t say this to be mean,” he told her as he closed the cabinet and faced her. “I think it’s good we never bought this house.”
She knew what he meant. “You’re right. Our fighting would have destroyed it. If not physically, then its spirit or whatever it is houses have.”
He leaned against the center island. “You’re not the only one who has changed, Josie. I’m different, too. I accept my responsibility in what went wrong before. If I could have known what I know now, I would have done it all differently.”
What was he saying? “Me, too,” she whispered.
“I asked you before what you were going to do about this house. Have you decided?”
She shook her head. If they had a chance of working things out, then she wanted to keep the house for them. If not, she would sell it and go back to Los Angeles. She couldn’t stay in Beachside Bay and be close to Del, knowing he would never love her again.
“Are you going to stay in town for a while?” he asked.
That she could answer. She met his direct gaze and nodded. “Yes.” He’d asked the question. She forced herself to take the next step. “We’re different people today.”
“Agreed. Which complicates everything.”
How did it complicate anything? she wanted to ask. Damn him for being cryptic. Not that she was being forthcoming, either.
“Maybe we should start with getting to know each other again,” she murmured, averting her gaze, then holding her breath.
“I kind of thought we were. Or was that some other wildcat in my bed last night?”
His words made her blush but also eased her tension. “It was me.”
He came around the center island to her wheelchair. “I was teasing,” he said. “I’d very much like for us to get to know each other again. If you’re willing.”
Her heart pounded so loudly, she was sure the neighbors could hear it. “I’d like that very much.”
Del stepped into the private cubicle the bank provided for its safety deposit box customers. He sat in the chair and slowly raised the cover on the narrow metal box.
There were several documents, including the pink slips for his truck and his car, a deed to the house and copies of his and his parents’ wills. There were also two velvet-covered jewelry boxes.
He opened the first and saw a plain gold man’s wedding band. After picking it up, he glanced at the inscription on the inside.
“Be mine forever.”
He started to slip the ring onto his left hand, then stopped himself. Instead he put it back in the first box and opened the second. A small diamond solitaire engagement ring winked up at him. There was a matching gold band tucked into the box as well. Josie’s rings. She’d returned them to him after she’d left him.
He remembered his pain and shock when he’d opened the envelope. Along with a quitclaim deed, she’d sent back the wedding rings and a check for half their savings account. Right to the bitter end, she’d been more than fair. Although Scott Construction had been in the family for years, his divorce lawyer had warned him that Josie could have requested a portion of profits for the time they were married. He didn’t doubt that her lawyer had told her the same. But she’d never once mentioned that. Nor had she asked for anything other than her half of the profit on their house.
He placed her wedding rings into the palm of his hand and squeezed his fingers around the gold and diamonds. A few days before, they’d talked about wanting to get to know each other. Now, holding a piece of their past in his hand, he knew he’d been stalling. He didn’t need any more time to know what he wanted. He was in love with her and he wanted to spend the rest of his life with her. He wanted them to get married and this time figure out how to make it work.
He was hopeful, more hopeful than he’d been in a long time. They’d both changed. They had the hard-learned lessons from the past and a second chance. But he also knew the price of what they were doing. There was a whole lot more on the line.
The first time Josie had walked out of his life, he’d been hurt, but he hadn’t been destroyed. This time was different. Josie today was an irresistible combination of old and new. Everything he’d adored about her before remained. It blended perfectly with her new traits. Things like patience and honesty. She’d stolen his heart in a whole new way, which meant he was even more at risk. This time if she walked out on him, he wouldn’t recover.
The realization didn’t change his mind. He needed her in his life. Whatever the risk, he was willing to take it. But not with these.
He put the old rings back into their velvet containers so he could return them to the safety deposit box. He didn’t want to start over with these talismans of the past. He was going to propose, and if she accepted, they would wear new rings. Rings that symbolized their future not their past.
Two hours later Del walked into his house. He’d gone to a local jewelry store to look at engagement rings. He’d only planned on window shopping but instead he’d bought a glittering two-carat solitaire that he hoped would leave her breathless. Well, not so breathless that she couldn’t say yes.
He was nervous, he admitted to himself. He didn’t question that he was doing the right thing. Instead he found himself wondering if Josie would say yes. After all she—
He paused in the center of the living room, noticing for the first time that a pounding beat came from the kitchen. He followed the loud music, not sure what it meant. As he rounded the corner, he saw Josie standing in the center of the kitchen. She was moving in time with the rock music, shifting her weight from hip to hip, singing along.
Dancing!
Walking!
He couldn’t believe it. She wasn’t in her wheelchair and she didn’t look as if she’d just hopped up for the moment. There was a confidence in her movements, a sureness that indicated not only practice, but lack of pain. He remembered the doctor’s visit the week before. Had she been given the all-clear to walk? Why the hell hadn’t she told him?
Rage filled him. Once again Josie was playing him for a fool. All this time he’d been planning their future together while she’d been…been…Hell, he didn’t know what she’d been doing but it was wrong, damn her. This whole thing had been a game. She hadn’t changed at all.
He walked over to the radio. She still hadn’t seen him. With one violent movement, he turned the knob, shutting off the machine. There was instant silence.
Josie nearly stumbled in surprise. She spun to see what had happened and saw Del standing in the kitchen. He was glaring at her. Something dark and ugly tightened his face. If he’d been any other kind of man she might have worried for her physical safety. Obviously he’d figured out that she was back on her feet, and he wasn’t happy about the news. Or rather her silence on the subject.
She felt her legs start to give way. Sudden shock robbed her strength. She made it to one of the kitchen chairs and collapsed. Her chest felt tight, as if she couldn’t possibly draw in enough air. Passing out would be a nice touch, she thought, trying to find humor in the situation. Unfortunately Del would probably leave her gasping on the floor. Not that she could blame him. Annie May had warned her, but she hadn’t listened. She’d been a coward and now she was paying the price.
“I kept the truth from you before,” she said with a shrug. “One would think I would l
earn. But I haven’t. Not about this. The thing is, my motivation is the same. I was afraid.”
It was as if he hadn’t heard her. “How long?”
His voice was a low growl. She shivered, but not from pleasure. She understood what he was asking. How long had she been walking?
“Since my last doctor’s visit. She told me to start with a couple of hours a day and work up from there.”
“And you didn’t think I would be interested in that particular piece of information?”
Josie drew in a deep breath. This would be what Annie May liked to call a defining moment in one’s life. Fear or no fear, she was going to have to tell him the exact truth, regardless of the consequences. She didn’t want to. What if he rejected her? She knew that she would physically survive without Del, but her heart would be small and shattered. Like her legs, it would never fully recover.
What if she’d misunderstood what they were doing? What if—
She shook her head to clear out the doubt. It didn’t matter. She had to speak the truth from the very depths of her being and hope Del believed her.
Slowly she forced herself to her feet. She moved so that she was behind the chair and could press her hands on the back for support.
“I may not get much better than this,” she told him. “I’ll have two more surgeries in the next couple of years. They should help, but there’s a chance they won’t do more than eliminate some of the pain. I might get more mobile, but I might not.”
His dark eyes flashed with contempt. “What the hell does that have to do with anything?”
“I want you to be very clear on my condition.”
He started to dismiss her with a wave, but she stopped him.
“No,” she said forcefully. “Don’t brush me off. This is important.”
“What’s important is why you lied to me. I thought we were making a fresh start. I thought I mattered.”
“You do,” she said desperately. “Please, Del. Just listen. I’m not who I was three years ago. In some ways that’s good, but in others it’s not. I haven’t fully come to terms with my limitations. I don’t think you have, either.” She squared her shoulders. “The reason I didn’t tell you I was walking was because I didn’t want to leave your house. I thought if you knew I was better, you might ask me to go. I didn’t know if I would survive that.”
“Why would leaving matter?”
He sounded hostile and suspicious. Nothing about his expression told her what he was thinking. It was very possible she was about to make a huge fool of herself, but it was too late for her to stop now.
“I love you, Del. I have for a long time. Maybe I never stopped loving you. Three years ago I was an idiot who walked out on something wonderful. We’ve been over everything that went wrong between us and this isn’t the time to do that again. My point is, I’m sorry for my part in the failure of our marriage.”
She was shaking. She shuffled around the chair and sank onto the seat. He was silent, not helping her at all. Still, Josie was determined to get it all out.
“When that truck hit me, I had a couple of seconds before I blacked out. I knew it had been a bad accident, and I really thought I was going to die. I didn’t think about my family or my childhood. What I thought about was you. The loss of you and our marriage was my greatest regret. For the past year I’ve continued thinking about you. That’s why I came back. At first I thought it was for closure, but I quickly figured out that I returned because I’m still in love with you.”
He clenched his hands into fists. “I want to believe you,” he said desperately.
“Then do. I love you, Del. Worse, I need you. I can’t imagine a world without you. I don’t want to have to find out, either. I want us to have another chance. You are the best part of me. I need you to survive—not physically, but emotionally. The truth is I’ve always needed you. I just didn’t know it before.”
Something soft and wonderful flickered in his eyes. “We can’t go back to the way it was before. The old Josie and the old Del. It didn’t work.”
“I know. We’re both different people. It’s going to take some effort to avoid old patterns, but I think we’re doing really well so far.”
“Me, too.” He crouched next to her chair. “The new and improved Josie Scott is the most amazing woman I’ve ever known.”
Hope flared inside of her. “Really?”
“Yeah. All I ever wanted was for you to need me.”
“I do need you.”
He took her hand in his. “I love you, Josie.”
“Oh, Del.”
She threw herself at him. He caught her in his arms and held her close.
“I love you,” she whispered. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you I was walking.”
“I know. I even understand. But no more secrets, okay?”
“Promise.”
“So you want to get married again, or what.”
She straightened. He was smiling at her. “You’re proposing?”
“Absolutely. In fact let me do a better job of it.”
He shifted so that he was on one knee, then he pulled a ring box out of his pocket and held it out to her.
“I love you, Josie. I want us to start over, learning from the lessons of the past and this time getting it right. I would be very honored if you would agree to be my wife. Again.”
She laughed, then hiccupped on an unexpected sob. When he handed her the box, she opened it and stared down at the beautiful diamond ring.
“It’s different,” she said.
“I still have the old ones, but I thought we deserved something new. For our fresh start. So are you going to marry me?”
Josie hesitated. “I do love you, Del, but I need you to be very sure. I’ll never be the same. I have scars.”
“You and your scars. What you have, aside from an incredibly stubborn streak, is a man who loves you very much and is grateful to have you back in his life. He would also like you to accept his proposal because the ground is hurting his knee and he wants to take you to bed and make love with you.”
She threw her arms around him and laughed. “That was a lovely speech, and I would adore for you to take me to bed.”
He kissed her, then slid the ring on her finger. Even as she admired the glittering diamond, he gathered her in his arms and headed for the bedroom. As they entered the room, he murmured, “Say yes, Josie.”
“Oh, didn’t I accept?”
“Josie!” He growled low in his throat, but this time the tension came from passion, not anger.
“Not just yes, Del,” she said just before she kissed him. “But always.”
ISBN: 978-1-4268-4375-4
WIFE IN DISGUISE
Copyright © 2001 by Susan Macias Redmond
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*Hometown Heartbreakers
‡Brides of Bradley House
‡Brides of Bradley House
**Desert Rogues
**Desert Rogues
**Desert Rogues
; ‡‡Lone Star Canyon
‡‡Lone Star Canyon
‡‡Lone Star Canyon
*Hometown Heartbreakers
*Hometown Heartbreakers
*Hometown Heartbreakers
*Hometown Heartbreakers
*Hometown Heartbreakers
†Triple Trouble
†Triple Trouble
†Triple Trouble
Wife in Disguise Page 20
