by Adele Abbott
“World?”
“Did I say world? I meant country. They’re bringing in lots of stolen goods, including gnomes. I need to catch them red-handed, and I thought you could pose as a potential gnome buyer.”
“But what will my neighbours think?”
“You don’t actually have to buy one. I just need you to get them to come around to your house. I’ll do the rest.”
“Alright, dear. If you think it will help.”
I handed her the business card that Megan had given to me. “If you could ring this number, and arrange for them to call at your house, that would be great.”
“Okay, Jill. I’ll get straight on it.”
Winky was no longer wearing his cowboy outfit. Instead, today, he was dressed as a fireman. If I’m being perfectly honest, I thought he made a better cowboy than a fireman, but who am I to judge?
“Is there any point in my asking why the outfit?”
“None.”
“That’s what I figured.”
Once again, he had the camera set up on a tripod, and was taking photos of himself.
“Have you joined some kind of weird role-play dating site?”
“I don’t ask questions about your private life, so keep your nose out of mine.”
“Fair enough, but there’s something else I want to talk to you about.”
“Hold on a minute.” He took a few more photos, and then jumped up onto my desk. “Okay, what gives?”
“I’ve worked it out,” I said.
“I don’t have time for your cryptic clues.” He sighed. “What is it you’ve worked out? How to be a P.I? Not before time.”
“I know how you’re able to offer the rental properties so cheaply on that Purrbnb app of yours.”
“Really? Pray tell.”
“You’re getting cats to put properties on there when their owners are going away, aren’t you?”
“How did you find out?”
“Seems like I’m a better P.I. than you give me credit for.”
“Come on, tell me, how did you work it out?”
“Someone has moved into a house near to my sister. I’d seen it advertised on your app, but there’s no way the old couple who live there would ever allow anyone to use it as a holiday home. Their cat must have done it. He knew when they were going on holiday. I’m right, aren’t I?”
“So what if you are? No one gets hurt.”
“Apart from the couple who own the house. It will be wrecked when they get home.”
“No, it won’t. The people renting it have to tidy it up or they’ll get bad reviews, and never be able to use the service again.”
“Who’s going to give them a bad review? The owners know nothing about the arrangement.”
“Not the owner. The person who listed the property.”
“The cat?”
“Precisely. Now you see how it works.”
“It just isn’t right. I think you should pull the app, and close down the whole operation straightaway.”
“Do you really feel that passionately about it?”
“Yes. I think it’s outrageous.”
“Let me think about it.” He scratched his chin. “Okay, I’ve thought it through. No chance. If you think I’m giving up this goldmine just because it offends your sensibilities, then you’re even more delusional than I thought you were.”
***
Conrad Landers had been very convincing during our brief telephone conversation, but before I dismissed him entirely from my thinking, it occurred to me that I should talk to someone who had known him at the time of the murder. Back then, he and Patty Lake had both worked at the same garage, Meers Motors. My research had revealed that the garage had closed down seven years ago, but I was able to find an address for Colin Meers, the man who had owned it.
Rather than call ahead, I decided to go around to his house on spec.
The man tending the front garden was certainly in the right age group. His hair was grey, but quite thick for his age.
“Mr Meers?”
He looked up from his rose bed, and squinted at me. “Do I know you, young lady?”
“No. I wonder if I could talk to you about two of the people who used to work at your garage?”
“Sure. Do you mind if I carry on working while we talk?”
“Not at all. You have a lovely garden.”
“Thank you. It would be even better if it wasn’t for the slugs. Who was it you wanted to talk about? As if I didn’t know.”
“Conrad Landers and Patty Lake.”
“Are you the press?”
“No. I’m a private investigator. I’m working for Sophie Brownling. Her daughter, Angie, went missing around the same time as Patty was murdered.”
“I remember. They never did find her, did they?”
“I’m afraid not. Can you tell me what kind of person Conrad was?”
“Not a murderer. That’s for sure.”
“You sound very sure about that?”
“I am. We worked together long enough for me to get to know him well. The only time I ever saw him lose his cool was when the rep from a tools company tried it on with Patty. She and Conrad were seeing each other at the time.”
“What happened?”
“Nothing much. Conrad just gave him a bloody nose.”
“What was Patty like?”
“Nice girl. Very pretty. She and Conrad weren’t together for very long. I think she found someone else.”
“How did Conrad take it?”
“He was upset, as you can imagine.”
“Angry?”
“Maybe, but he would never have hurt Patty if that’s what you’re thinking.”
“What about the bloodstained top that was found in Conrad’s locker?”
“That’s what did for him.”
“Do you have any theories about how it got there?”
“No.”
“But you still don’t think Conrad did it?”
“I’ve never been surer of anything in my life. It’s a crying shame what happened to that boy.”
After leaving Colin Meers, I drove thirty miles to meet with Susan Bowles who was another one of the women who’d been with Angie Potts on the night of the disappearance.
She insisted on making tea, and plying me with cupcakes. The hardships I had to endure in this job.
“It only feels like yesterday,” she said. “I can’t believe it’s twenty years ago.”
“Do you think about it often?”
“All the time—even now. I can’t begin to imagine what her mother must have gone through all these years. The not knowing must be unbearable.”
“Do you remember much about that night?”
“If I’m honest, not really. To tell you the truth, I’d had way too much to drink. We all had, except for Angie.”
“Oh? Wasn’t she much of a drinker?”
“Angie?” Susan smiled. “She could really put it away, but not that night. She said she had a bad tummy.”
“But she stayed until the end?”
“Yeah. We all went our separate ways at the same time. If I’d just waited with her, then maybe—” Her words trailed away.
“How do you mean?”
“Karen and Michelle got a taxi together. There was only one other taxi waiting. Angie insisted I take it. She said she’d wait for the next one. That was the last time I saw her.” Susan choked on the words, and began to cry.
“Are you okay?”
“Yeah. I’m sorry. It still hurts even after all this time.”
“Apart from the tummy bug, did Angie seem okay that night, do you remember?”
“She was her usual miserable self. I loved Angie to bits, but she was never the life and soul of the party. Not like she used to be when we were younger.”
“Are you saying she’d changed?”
“Yeah. It hit her hard when her father died. She was never really the same person after that.”
“How did she get on with her
stepfather?”
“She didn’t. She hated him.”
“Why?”
“I don’t know the ins and outs because she would never talk about him. She was never going to like the person who tried to take the place of her real dad.”
“Do you have any theories about what might have happened to her that night?”
“I think some nutter must have picked her up in a car. Maybe someone posing as a taxi driver, but, I’m only guessing. Do you really think that you’ll be able to get to the bottom of this, after all this time?”
“I don’t know, but I’m going to give it my best shot.”
***
The other person who’d been on the night out with Angie was Michelle Wright. I’d arranged to see her later that day, but for now, I had something else I needed to attend to.
I made a call.
“Lolly? It’s Jill. I have some information about your boyfriend.”
“What’s he been up to?”
“You have nothing to worry about anymore.”
“Oh? Why?”
“I’ve just seen him leave on a train.”
“Where’s he going?”
“Edinburgh. He had two suitcases with him, so I assume he’s gone for good.”
“To Edinburgh? Are you sure?”
“Positive. That’s good news, isn’t it?”
“Err—yeah—look, Jill, I have to go.”
“What about my bill, Lolly?”
“I’ll pop in later this week to pay it. Is that okay?”
“Sure. I look forward to seeing you then.”
When I got back to the office, Winky was wearing a musketeer’s outfit, complete with sword.
“Very dashing.”
“Thank you. You’re looking remarkably pleased with yourself.”
“I am, and I have your gang to thank for it. I do believe I may have seen the last of Lolly Jolly. For some time, at least.”
“What have you done with her? You haven’t got her tied up in a basement somewhere, have you?”
“I should have thought of that. No, I’ve just sent her on a wild goose chase to Edinburgh.”
“Nice one.” Winky posed with his sword held aloft, and snapped a few photos.
“Are you going to tell me what’s going on with all these costumes?”
“No.”
Mrs V came through to my office. “Why have you got him dressed up like that?” She was staring at Winky.
“I think it suits him, don’t you?”
“He could do himself an injury with that sword. Not that I care. Anyway, I’ve just heard back from the gnome man. He’s coming to my house tonight.”
“That’s great. He’s in for a big surprise.”
Chapter 22
I’d promised to go to Cuppy C to see the grand unveiling of the fish tank. To be perfectly honest, I wasn’t overly keen to go. Seen one fish; seen too many fish. Aunt Lucy had been roped in too, so I’d said I’d meet her at her house, and we could walk over together.
I magicked myself over to Candlefield, and landed outside Aunt Lucy’s front door. There was a removal van parked outside the neighbour’s house.
“Hi!” A tall, young wizard, dressed in jeans and a polo shirt walked over to me. “I’m Glen. We’re moving in next door.”
“Nice to meet you. I’m Jill. This is my aunt’s house.”
“I met your aunt the other day. She seems very nice.”
“She is. Are you by yourself today?”
“Yeah. My other half has to work, so she’s left me to it. By the time she gets here, it should all be done.”
“It sounds like she’s got her head screwed on.”
“Where do you want these?” One of the removal men shouted.
“I’d better go,” Glen said. “I’m supposed to be supervising. Nice to meet you, Jill.”
“You too.”
Aunt Lucy was putting the finishing touches to her makeup.
“I’ve just seen your new neighbour.”
“Glen? Nice young man, isn’t he?”
“Seems like it.”
“Who’s a nice young man?” Grandma appeared out of nowhere.
“My new neighbour, mother.”
“Neighbours? More trouble than they’re worth. Are you going to make me a cup of tea or what? A person could die of thirst.”
“I don’t have time. Jill and I are going to see the unveiling of the twins’ fish tank. Would you like to come with us?”
“No, I would not. The only fish I’m interested in are those next to my chips and mushy peas. Don’t you have time to make me a cuppa before you go?”
“No, I don’t, mother. You know where the kettle is.”
“Charming. And here I am, exhausted from my new successful business venture.”
“Mrs V said the ballroom was a resounding success,” I said.
“Of course it was. What did you expect? I’ll need to employ more staff.”
Why don’t you stop playing at detective, and come and run my ballroom?”
“Tempting an offer as that is, I’m going to have to decline. I do know someone who is looking for a job, though.”
“Who’s that?”
“Her name is Maria. She’s just moved to Washbridge, and is going out with Luther, my accountant.”
“Is she a human?”
“No. She’s a sup. A vampire, actually.”
“Vampire? They’re an untrustworthy lot.”
“That’s something of a generalisation, isn’t it? Maria seems sound enough to me.”
“Does that mean you’re vouching for her?”
“Err—I—err—I guess so.”
“In that case, tell her to come and see me. If it doesn’t work out, I’ll know who to blame.”
“Okay. While I’ve got you here, there’s something I need to tell you about Yarnstormers, and I don’t think you’re going to like it.”
“Hurry up then. Places to go, people to see.”
“Ma Chivers owns it.”
“And?”
“Didn’t you hear what I said? Ma Chivers owns Yarnstormers.”
“So?”
“I—err—thought you’d be—err—”
“You may have time to stand around here talking gibberish all day, but I don’t. And it doesn’t look like anyone is going to make me a cup of tea, so I may as well be on my way. Goodbye.”
And with that, she was gone. I’d expected Grandma to explode when she found out about Ma Chivers, but she seemingly couldn’t have cared less. That woman was an enigma wrapped up in a thingamabob.
Aunt Lucy and I set off for Cuppy C.
“Have you actually seen the tank the twins have bought?” Aunt Lucy said.
“Yeah. I was with them when they ordered it. It’s massive. I tried to persuade them to go for something smaller, but you know what they’re like.”
“I certainly do.”
“Are they expecting a big crowd?”
“I wouldn’t have thought so. People are hardly going to be queuing around the block just to see a few fish, are they?”
“Did you hear what happened with the Tammy Winestock fiasco, Aunt Lucy?”
“I did, and I could kick myself for not getting there earlier that day. I could really use a book on asparagus.”
And believe it or not, she said that with a straight face.
Aunt Lucy checked her watch. “We’re running late. The twins won’t be happy.”
“We can blame Grandma. She slowed us down.”
“If you’ve come to see the fish, I wouldn’t bother.” A grumpy, old wizard pushed past us as we walked into the shop.
“Total waste of time.” A vampire was also headed for the door.
“What’s going on?” Aunt Lucy said.
That’s what I wanted to know too. From where I was standing, I could just about see the twins over the crowd. What I couldn’t see was the giant fish tank.
It took me a few minutes, but I managed to push my way to t
he front; Aunt Lucy followed in my wake.
“Oh dear.” I laughed.
The twins glared at me.
“Where’s the fish tank?” Aunt Lucy said, then she spotted it, and she laughed too.
“Charming!” Pearl was red in the face. “I might have known you two would think this is funny.”
“Sorry, girls.” Aunt Lucy was trying, without much success, to stop laughing.
“That’s smaller than I remember it.” I pointed to the tiny fish bowl on the table, which had two goldfish in it.
“You’re not funny, Jill.” Amber scowled.
“What happened to the big tank? Don’t tell me it broke?”
“It’s around the back in the alley,” Pearl said.
“What’s it doing out there?”
Pearl mumbled something under her breath.
“Sorry? What did you say?”
“I said, it won’t fit through the door.”
How I kept the laughter at bay, I’ll never know. “I thought you had all the necessary dimensions?”
“She was the one who measured it.” Amber pointed an accusatory finger at her sister. “But she failed to say she’d measured it in centimetres.”
“I told you the measurements were in centimetres!” Pearl said.
“No, you didn’t. You said they were in inches.”
“I never mentioned inches.”
“What are you going to do with the tank?” Aunt Lucy asked.
I got in quick before the twins could respond. “You could always fill it with water, and advertise it as an open-air swimming pool.”
I managed to duck the first cupcake, but the second one caught me on the shoulder.
“Hey, stop! You’re wasting good food.”
The third one caught me smack bang on the chin.
***
To visit Michelle Wright by car would have meant a four-hour round trip, and I really couldn’t face all that driving, so I magicked myself there.
What? I know I’ve said I don’t like to use magic to move around the human world, but what can I tell you? Sometimes I’m a rebel.
Michelle had told me on the phone that she was married, and had a daughter who’d just started at university.
