by Beakman, Onk
Stealth Elf appeared behind him, dragonfang daggers drawn and ready for action. She didn’t seem fazed by the smell, but then again she had been patrolling the acrid area for most of the morning. The elf’s glowing eyes darted around the clearing and, once she was convinced there was no immediate danger, visibly relaxed.
“This way,” she said, disappearing through the bushes in front of them. Spyro followed, being careful to avoid a Vampire vine that was snaking around an old rotting tree. He didn’t want to get tangled in that.
He found Stealth Elf crouched beside the riverside, looking down at the foul-smelling mud. “Here it is,” she whispered.
Spyro looked over her shoulder and his eyes widened. Stealth Elf had been right. There, in the soft, squelchy mud was a massive webbed footprint. It was so big Spyro could have easily curled up in it.
“They’re all over the water’s edge,” Stealth Elf explained, her large pointed ears twitching as she listened for sounds of danger. “Dozens of them.”
“Do you think it’s a water dragon?” Spyro asked, comparing the size of the print with his own paw. His looked worryingly small in comparison.
“If it is, it’s the biggest I’ve ever—”
Stealth Elf’s words were cut off by the sound of a scream.
“Someone’s in trouble,” shouted Spyro. “Come on!”
“Help me,” the voice squealed as Spyro burst into the clearing. “Please. Somebody help!”
It was a Mabu, running around and around in circles, one hand keeping a battered hat on his head and the other swatting away the three Chompies that were snapping at his legs.
When he spotted the two Skylanders, his face beamed with delight.
“Skylanders! Thank heaven, I…ow!”
The delight faded in an instant as one of the Chompies sunk its long teeth into the Mabu’s plump posterior.
“Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow!”
The Mabu charged this way and that, trying—and failing— to shake the backside-biter from his bottom.
“Get it off me! Get it off me!”
Stealth Elf sprinted forward. The two remaining Chompies spun in her direction, fangs flashing hungrily in the dull light. They raced toward her, but she changed direction at the last minute and shot off to the side. The Chompies couldn’t stop in time and crashed into each other. They fell back, stunned, but weren’t down for long. The snapping critters got back to their feet and whizzed around. Their beady eyes stretched wide with surprise.
Where there had been one Stealth Elf, there now stood two. Delight flickered over the Chompies’ faces. More legs to chew! Fantastic! They scuttled forward, launched themselves into the air, and threw their jaws open, ready to bite down. But when their mouths snapped shut, their teeth closed on empty air and they crashed through both Stealth Elves as if they weren’t there. Which they weren’t.
Spyro grinned as the Chompies bounced like bewildered beach balls across the clearing. Of course, they didn’t know that Stealth Elf could create decoy doubles of herself to confuse her enemies. In a blur of motion, the real Stealth Elf appeared behind them and, with a swift kick, sent them both flying into a nearby tree.
Two down, one to go.
Spyro turned back to the Mabu, who was still racing around the clearing, the Chompy fixed firmly to his rear.
“Stand still!” Spyro shouted out.
The Mabu was so shocked he skidded to a halt, his eyes widening as he saw Spyro lower his head.
“But, but, but…” the Mabu stuttered.
“Exactly,” yelled Spyro, breaking into a run. “Sprint charge!”
The Chompy let out a little squeak as Spyro’s horns butted into its side. With a flick of his head, Spyro sent the creature spinning through the air, a scrap of the Mabu’s stripy underwear still clenched between its teeth. It crashed through the branches and sailed out of sight.
“That’s the last we’ll see of them,” Stealth Elf said, slipping her daggers back into her belt.
“Good thing, too,” agreed Spyro. “We need to get to the bottom of the footprint mystery.”
“Can we not mention bottoms?” moaned the Mabu, rubbing his sore behind.
Chapter Four
THE SWAMP MONSTER
Spyro waited patiently as Snuckles, the Mabu they had rescued from the Chompies, tied his hat to his backside. It only just covered the ragged hole in his pants, and the corks jangled every time he moved. Still, it was the best they could do for now.
“I still don’t get why you’re here,” Spyro said when Snuckles had finished his emergency repairs. “You don’t look like you’ve come to fish. You haven’t even got a rod.”
“Oh no, I hate fish,” admitted Snuckles. “They make me break out in a nasty rash. It was my best friend who was the fisherman.”
“Your friend?” asked Stealth Elf.
“Yes,” replied Snuckles. “Nort came here two days ago and never returned. I’ve been worried sick.”
“So you came here looking for him?”
Snuckles nodded, his bottom lip quivering. “But if there’s some kind of swamp monster—”
“We don’t know that for sure,” cut in Spyro. A sniveling Mabu was the last thing they wanted—and this fellow seemed to snivel at the drop of a hat. “We’ll help you find him.”
“You will?” Snuckles brightened immediately.
“We will?” Stealth Elf crossed her arms. “Before or after we’ve tracked down the owner of the giant webbed feet?”
Spyro sighed. Stealth Elf may have been a highly trained ninja, able to sneak up silently on anyone, but sometimes she had the tact of a rampaging Cyclops Mammoth. He opened his mouth, but before he could retort, a loud belching noise boomed through the air.
“How rude,” sniffed Snuckles, putting his hands on his hips in disgust. “Didn’t your mother tell you not to burp in public?”
“That wasn’t me,” Spyro hissed, the spines flattening against his head.
Another deafening croak thundered around the clearing.
“But if it wasn’t you…” started Stealth Elf, but she didn’t get a chance to finish her sentence. Without warning, something long, pink, and slimy shot out of the bushes. It slammed into Stealth Elf’s back and stuck firm. She twisted, trying to see what had attached itself to her, but was pulled off her feet as the muscular tentacle whipped back into the undergrowth, dragging Stealth Elf with it.
“What was that?” screamed a terrified Snuckles, but Spyro didn’t answer. Instead he leaped after her, crashing through branches and brambles until he smashed through to the other side.
His mouth dropped open as he skidded to a halt, not quite believing what he saw. There, in his path, sat an orange toad. Yet this was no ordinary orange toad. It was an orange toad the size of a very large and very fat elephant. It also looked far from happy.
Horrible noises were emanating from its oversize belly, and its eyes boggled and bulged. Suddenly, without warning, it let out an almighty belch and spewed something onto the ground in front of Spyro. Not something. Somebody. It was Stealth Elf, covered in slimy toad spit.
“What happened?” Spyro asked, looking her up and down.
“It disagreed with something it ate,” she replied, pushing slime-encrusted hair from her eyes. “Me!”
Snuckles stumbled through the plants and scrambled to a halt.
“No!” Spyro shouted. “Stay out of the way, Snuckles.”
“But, but, but…” stammered Snuckles, “that’s a…a…a…”
“Massive toad with warts the size of your head. I know.” In front of them, the toad was rearing up on its back legs, obviously ready to attack. “Stealth, get Snuckles out of here. I’ll deal with this.”
Perhaps this is just the time to practice my Daybringer Flame after all, he said to himself. But Stealth Elf wasn’t herding Snuckles out of danger. She was swaying on her feet and turning an unhealthy shade of green, which was quite an achievement for an elf.
“I don’t feel too good,�
� she slurred, tottering forward, “Sleepy. So…sleepy.”
Her knees buckled beneath her and Stealth Elf fell against Spyro. Spyro grabbed for his friend and helped her slip gently to the floor. She was snoring peacefully by the time her head hit the ground.
“That’s it!” Spyro exclaimed, looking back up at the toad.
“What’s it?” asked Snuckles, too terrified to move, save for his knees, which knocked together.
“I’ve got a photographic memory,” Spyro explained. “I never forget anything, and I’ve seen one of those before.”
“Where?”
“All over the place. They’re really common.”
Snuckles wrung his hands together.
“It doesn’t look that common to me. It looks furious.”
“But that’s just it,” Spyro continued, looking at the bright blue markings that covered the creature’s broad back. “It’s a titchy toad. You can usually fit three of them in the palm of your hand, they’re so small.”
“You’d have to have pretty big hands.”
“Exactly. So what on earth has made it grow so—”
Spyro yawned.
The dragon shook his head, trying to clear it. Spyro had never felt so tired. It was almost as if his legs could no longer carry his weight. He looked down at them, willing them to stop shaking. Of course! The titchy toad had highly toxic spittle that it used to send its victims to sleep. Stealth Elf had been covered in the stuff. When he’d helped her to the ground, the toad spit had smeared all over his scales. He was falling asleep, too.
“Spyro, wake up!”
He could hear Snuckles screaming, but it was all he could do to stay awake. His eyelids felt like lead weights. Surely no one would mind if he took a little nap?
“Help me!”
What? Spyro forced his eyes open and gazed sleepily back. Odd. Why was Snuckles scrabbling around on the ground? And why was he moving backward?
“It’s got my ankle!” the Mabu shrieked. “It’s pulling me back.”
Sure enough, a Vampire vine had wrapped itself around Snuckles’s struggling ankle and was dragging him into the undergrowth.
Snuckles reached out toward the exhausted dragon, but grabbed on to more than he bargained for. With an earsplitting croak, the toad shot out its tongue, slamming it between Snuckles’s outstretched arms. It stuck fast and the hapless Mabu suddenly found himself caught in the middle of a titanic tug-of-war. The vine continued to try to pull him back into the woodland while the tongue tried to yank him forward into the toad’s waiting mouth. If Spyro didn’t act soon, the poor Mabu would be torn in two.
He tried to move, but the effort of lifting just one wing was too great. Then a huge, webbed foot crashed down on Spyro’s back, pinning him to the muddy ground. In order to get more purchase, the toad had stepped right on top of the sleepy Skylander.
Can today get any worse? thought Spyro as a flash of blinding light burst all over the clearing. Spots danced in front of Spyro’s tired eyes, but when his vision cleared he realized that yes, today could get much, much worse.
There, in the center of the clearing, stood Kaos himself.
Chapter Five
AN UNLIKELY ALLY
“Well, well,” crowed Kaos, brandishing a large scarlet staff. “Look what we have here. Two snoozy Skylanders sleeping on the job.”
Spyro tried to snarl, but even that was too much effort. It was all he could do to stay awake.
“Er, Master?” said another voice. It was Glumshanks, Kaos’s loyal sidekick. When Kaos had first attempted to take over Skylands, Glumshanks had been by his side, and there the troll had remained through every fiendish plan and crushing defeat that followed.
Today, the long-suffering servant was standing with a large pair of shears in his spindly hands. “Master?” he repeated, “Shouldn’t we do something about that?” He nodded his head toward the gigantic amphibian that was still trying to pull Snuckles into its gaping maw.
“Wah!” cried Kaos, jumping slightly at his butler’s voice. “How many times have I told you not to sneak up on me? Well, what are you waiting for, FOOL? We need to do something about that.” The evil Portal Master jabbed the pointy red ruby at the end of his staff toward the toad.
“Of course, Master,” muttered Glumshanks. “How silly of me to forget.”
“Sometimes I don’t know why I bother.” Kaos shrugged, shaking his head at Spyro as if he was apologizing for his henchman’s inadequacies, before turning his attention back to Glumshanks. “You get pruning. I’ll deal with this monstrosity.”
Spyro couldn’t work out what was happening. When Kaos had appeared, he’d assumed this had all been a trap. Kaos had two main ambitions. First and foremost, he wanted to destroy the Core of Light so Darkness could cover Skylands. Secondly (and largely so he could achieve the first) he longed to defeat the Skylanders once and for all. He never succeeded, of course, but the one thing you could say about Kaos was that he was persistent.
Of course, you could also say he had dreadful personal hygiene, atrocious fashion sense, and the kind of face not even his own mother could love, but now wasn’t the time.
Surely this was Kaos’s idea of a dream come true. Two Skylanders incapacitated and completely at his mercy. Spyro wouldn’t stand a chance if Kaos attacked now. So why was the Portal Master pointing his staff, not at Spyro or Stealth Elf, but at the giant toad?
For that matter, why was Glumshanks setting about the vines that were coiled around Snuckles’s ankle? The lanky troll was attacking the snaking creepers like a demon gardener, all flashing blades and snipping shears. Perhaps Spyro was dreaming? Yes, that had to be it.
With a final “snip,” Glumshanks hacked through the vine. The malicious plant thrashed around wildly as Snuckles was released from its grip. The Mabu shot through the air toward the toad, the massive pink tongue contracting as if it were elastic. Snuckles smacked into the amphibian’s nose, stunning the creature.
“Ooooh,” mocked Kaos. “That’s gotta hurt. Right between the eyes.” As he spoke, dark red lightning crackled around the gem mounted at the end of the staff. “Now, listen up, you amphibian abomination—I, Kaos, will introduce you to your UNIMAGINABLE DOOM!”
A bolt of deep crimson energy burst from the end of Kaos’s staff and slammed into the toad. The creature croaked in surprise and, in a puff of pinkish smoke, vanished from sight.
“Ha!” Kaos punched the air in triumph. “I am unstoppable!” He spun around to face Snuckles, obviously expecting adoration, cheers, or at least a little polite applause. The shaking Mabu didn’t applaud. In fact, he started to cry. Kaos’s face fell.
“Is that it?” the Portal Master exclaimed. “No thanks? No praise? I don’t know if you noticed, but I just saved your life!!”
Yes, Spyro thought, and I still don’t know why. This wasn’t Kaos’s style at all. “He’s upset,” Spyro explained. “The danger may have passed, but his best friend is still missing.”
“Nort!” Snuckles wailed, sitting back on his hat. “He must have been eaten by that…by that…thing.” The Mabu dissolved into more sobs.
“Oh, him,” Kaos said, as if he’d just remembered something. “Why didn’t you say? I rescued him hours ago.”
Kaos clapped his hands and a Portal opened, depositing another shocked-looking Mabu into the mud.
“Nort?” Snuckles asked, not quite believing his eyes. “Nort, is that you?”
The newcomer blinked, recognition spreading across his face.
“Snuckles! I never thought I’d see you again!”
The two Mabu hugged.
“You’re Nort?” Spyro asked. “Snuckles’s friend?” Nort nodded happily. “And Kaos had you all this time? What did he do to you?”
“Do?” Nort asked. “I’ll tell you what he did. I was about to be eaten alive by a gigantic toad when he rescued me. He took me back to his lair…”
“Er, I call it Kaos Towers now,” Kaos interjected. “Lair just sounds a bit too…ev
il.”
Spyro’s brows raised. Since when did Kaos worry about sounding evil?
“This man is a hero!” Nort insisted.
“He certainly is!” agreed Snuckles, beaming wildly. “Three cheers for Kaos! Hip hip—”
“Oh, stop it.” Kaos blushed, before adding slyly, “Then again, if you must…”
Spyro watched slack-jawed as the two Mabu cheered their savior—the most wicked man Skylands had ever known. It was a good thing Stealth Elf was asleep. She would never believe this.
“Hip hip!”
“Hooray!”
“Hip hip!”
“Hooray!”
“Hip hip!”
“Hooray!”
This was the weirdest day of Spyro’s life.
“Thank you, my friends,” said Kaos, the very words sounding strange coming out of his mouth. Kaos didn’t have friends. He had minions and sworn enemies. “Now, spread the word. Wherever there is peril, wherever there is trouble, you can depend on Kaos to save the day. Kaos the champion. Kaos the hero. From this day on, evildoers are doomed, I tell you. DOOMED!”
Kaos threw his arms into the air and the two Mabu vanished in a flash of light.
“No!” Spyro gasped. “What have you done with them?”
“Er, he’s just sent them home,” explained Glumshanks.
“Back to where they belong,” confirmed Kaos. “What did you think I would do with them?”
Spyro didn’t know what to think.
“The question is, Skylanders, what to do with you?” Kaos continued.
Spyro’s head snapped up. Kaos had walked over to Stealth Elf and was peering down at her sleeping form.
“Leave her alone,” Spyro yelled, struggling back to his feet only to flop down again.
“Two of Eon’s greatest Skylanders reduced to this. So weak.” A sly grin played across his thin lips. “So helpless. So weak.”
Finally, Spyro thought, this is the Kaos we all know and hate. It was a trap after all. He braced himself for the worst.
