by Jade White
“Why am I a werebear?” Ryker asked.
“And why isn’t anyone else? I’m inclined to think that the werebeing strain is in all of us; it just depends on how the body adapts to it.”
“I can’t control it,” Ryker said.
“Of course, you can. That’s evolution right there. You didn’t choose to be born; you were just your father’s strongest sperm, whoever your real father is.”
Alexia looked at Ryker, her face reddening. Edith had taught her a little about the birds and the bees and why she didn’t have her monthly period. Ryker’s cheeks burned, but he ignored Alexia’s stare.
“I have no idea who he is.”
“Certainly, isn’t me,” Barrett joked. He stood up straight, stretching his back and arms. “Now, we wait,” he said. “You two don’t mind being left alone here for a couple of hours, right? I have to fix a broken steamer down by the town’s only vacation lodge.”
Ryker looked wary.
“You’re safe, don’t worry. I’ll come running if you aren’t.”
“You’re kinda old--" Ryker paused, feeling Alexia nudge his stomach with her elbow.
“Ah, yes I am, but I also have werebeing genes, except they aren’t as pronounced as yours. I have never shifted, but my senses are quite acute. I think that’s the best thing about being a werebeing,” Barrett said. “Maybe this is a result of working with genuine werebeings. Of course, we did some tests on ourselves-"
Alexia looked at him in horror.
“It wasn’t that bad. We just wanted to see if it affected us. Bites didn’t. There was no rabies involved either.”
“What else did you find out? It could be useful for our survival.”
“I’ve been away for too long,” he said with a sigh. “I know that werebeings can’t give birth to werebeings. In fact, it skips generations, so, Ryker, you’d better find out who these people are. We’ve also discovered that the majority of your kind are sterile. The body must’ve adjusted greatly to the changes, thus the hormonal imbalance.
Now, despite the hormonal imbalance, werebeings are still imbued with strength and stamina that normal humans don’t have-which I don’t have either, unfortunately.” He looked at his beaten-down-looking watch. “I’ll be back. You kids stay inside.”
“What if they--"
“I’ll know it when I smell them,” Barrett smiled. “It was why I also refused to fight back on their dismissal. I didn’t want them to find out.”
They slowly trudged up the stairs, and the doctor grabbed his heavy toolkit. “I salvaged a motorbike so I don’t have to walk to town. It’s a good thirty-minute walk away. There’s food in the fridge and whatnot. Just don’t go out. I planted these plants around us on purpose to mask my scent.”
Ryker nodded, watching him leave. His motorbike was a sad-looking bike with worn down wheels, but it suited him fine. He guessed it was part of Barrett’s cover. He turned to face Alexia who was standing quietly behind him.
“So what now?”
“I can cook,” she replied with a slight frown. “He doesn’t have much, but I’ll make do with what he has.”
“You’ve only tried cooking for two days at most.”
“They key word is ‘try,’” she said.
“Wait, help me research about us first.”
“He’s already told us what he knows,” Alexia told him. “Besides, I’d never heard of so much information my whole life. If that’s what a real school is like, I don’t think I’d want to go.”
Ryker almost laughed, but there were pressing matters to face. He grabbed her hand, leading her back to the basement once more.
“Help me look for stuff.”
“What stuff?”
“Important stuff.”
“We aren’t scientists.”
“He must have some notes,” Ryker insisted. “Notes we can understand.”
Alexia frowned and looked at the stack of books. “I’d rather read a cookbook.”
“He’s not telling us everything.”
“He’s got secrets that burden him,” Alexia told him.
“Are you kidding me?” Ryker looked exasperated. “These are our lives at stake. Anything, just anything.”
Alexia sighed and grabbed a notebook, leafing through the pages. One notebook was filled with drawings of machinery, complete with details and parts needed to build it. It seemed like he was trying to replicate the military rifles used but had scrapped the idea.
It was hard to believe that Dr. Delaney allowed herself to be left behind while he left without so much as an injury, Ryker thought. If Wallace had been that sadistic to them as subjects, wouldn’t he have been sadistic to Barrett as a colleague he no longer respected?
He saw pages filled with names. Were those the names of the werebeings he had experimented on before? Ryker looked at Alexia, whose face looked strange underneath the low ceiling with its low-hanging warm lamps.
Alexia stopped flipping at her pages and saw Ryker reading through a notebook. “What’s that?”
“Names,” Ryker replied in a quiet voice.
“Is my name in there?”
He shook his head. “I’ve been going through dates. How old are you?”
“Sixteen or seventeen,” she replied. “I’m not sure.”
The dates were incoherently listed down, not in chronological order. It was as if Barrett had hastily written the names down, a sort of eulogy he had made for those he had experimented on with Wallace. The names listed down to the hundreds. It was no wonder Sector 12 was desperate to clone their kind, and they failed spectacularly at it.
“These people are way older than we are…” Ryker realized. “They were killed before we even started to walk.”
“Maybe my real parents are there,” Alexia said. “Not that I know who they are.”
Ryker put the notebook down. “Dr. Barrett asked me if you’re experiencing any changes.”
“Like what?”
“The nosebleeds. Have they become frequent?”
“What’s this about?” she asked him warily.
“He thinks you’re adapting to the werebeing genome.”
“I don’t feel like I am, not yet.”
“It’s not that kind of adaptation,” he said, “but I think he’s worried it’ll land you back in that lab again.”
“Because I did that to you and to Caliban?” her voice was small. She lifted her chin up, taking a deep breath. “I’m not going back. Now that I know how cruel they are.”
“You aren’t,” Ryker said. “They’ll have to pry you from my cold, dead hands-" he stopped, realizing he sounded forceful, realizing he meant every word again.
“I don’t want you dead.”
“I won’t die. Not yet,” Ryker said firmly. “I said I’d be here for you.” His back was turned as he said that, afraid that she would see the look on his face. He took a deep breath, sifting through notebooks on the shelf.
“No, you won’t be,” Alexia said.
Ryker was surprised, and he spun around. “What makes you say that?”
“I just know it,” she said, closing her eyes.
Ryker took a few steps closer to her, and he looked at her as she stood, her palms clenched tightly as she closed her eyes. His heart was pounding, and he couldn’t believe he was thinking of doing something like that at a time like this. He had no intention of leaving her, and he told himself they had to see Alaska together or whichever paradise was left.
He knew his irritation at her stemmed from the fact that her presence made him feel vulnerable. She wasn’t the only one who was having changes; in fact, he was, too. A change of feelings he had been pushing away since he had begun to realize it. It was as uncomfortable as having to sleep on the ground with rocks and dirt; except, it never left his mind. Had she always affected him so much?
He recalled her face, that strange calm coming over her when he’d had no idea what he was in for. He had been bruised, beaten, had blood drawn; and he had been forc
ed to shift, because they had used her… He heard her voice, and he knew they were deeply connected, whether he wanted this or not. And for some strange reason, he wanted to be connected to her.
When he slept at night and the nightmares began and her face appeared, his heart would stop beating too fast. He would find that the nightmares were replaced with happier things. Was this what he secretly wanted? He just wanted to read a book, while she was there beside him, reading her choice of literature, too. They would be on some mountaintop with a crystal-clear lake in front of them, and there, he could see her smile more than often. Always, he could see her smile always.
He walked closer to her, his face meeting hers, and without warning, he leaned in and kissed her on the lips. It was a soft, slow, and chaste kiss, and feeling her lips on his proved to be his greatest triumph in all his years of surviving.
Ryker suddenly backed away, unable to believe he had done that. He could still feel her lips on his as he pulled away from her.
Alexia’s eyes flew open, realizing what had just happened. Was that what she had heard back then? Was that a kiss? It was warm and a bit wet on her lips…but it felt nice. Her heart pounded as she tried to digest what had just happened. He had kissed her. He had kissed her! Heat began to rise up on her cheeks, and Alexia found herself walking out of the basement and up the stairs.
Ryker stood in the middle of the small lab for a moment, and then he realized he had left her alone, or she had left him. He took a deep breath and cursed, knowing he had been an idiot.
Of course, she wouldn’t want that. It didn’t help that he almost always was stern with her. He had never shown that much affection for her until today. He bounded up the stairs, hoping she hadn’t left the house.
“Alexia,” he whispered. He noticed her sitting in the doctor’s study on the sad-looking sofa bed she had slept in earlier.
He sighed and sat beside her. “I’m sorry,” he said sincerely.
She didn’t look at him, just at the wooden floor, noticing the grains on it. “Why?” her voice cracked.
“Why did I kiss you?”
She didn’t reply.
“Do I have to have a reason?” Ryker breathed. “I kissed you because I wanted to, and not for any other reason. I didn’t kiss you to worry you or confuse you. I just wanted to, okay?”
“You’re making things weird for me. You’re making things difficult for me,” Alexia suddenly said.
“Difficult?” Ryker sputtered. “How can that make things difficult?”
“Well, for starters, you didn’t ask permission.”
“I’m sorry for that.”
“That was my first kiss. I don’t know if it should even matter, but I feel like it should--"
“Are you kidding me?” Ryker snapped at her. “I’ve done nothing but care for you, and you still don’t trust me, even after that?”
Alexia was silent. “I still didn’t like it much.”
“But you liked it a little?” Ryker questioned her sarcastically. He felt heat rise up in his body, and his heart beat faster than he had thought it would. Perhaps, that was a terrible idea, after all. Perhaps, he shouldn’t have been so forward about it. Asking would have been weird. He would have never found the courage to ask her if he could kiss her anyway.
Alexia shook her head, and he saw a ghost of a smile on her lips. “It doesn’t matter. It already happened. I guess I can try to cook dinner.”
She rose up from the bed and proceeded for the kitchen as Ryker looked blankly at space. What the hell was that? Had she accepted it so quickly? Had she ignored his efforts, then? He felt like an even bigger fool. He almost wanted to tear the place apart in frustration, unable to understand quite yet what he had been feeling. So I don’t mean anything to her?
Ryker took a deep breath, feeling a headache form. He had no idea that even a kiss could become a stressor. He finally stood up, knowing he had to do something, lest he go berserk. He decided to go back down to the lab. Maybe he would find something there now that he was annoyed.
CHAPTER 12
Dinner had been an awkward affair, but Ryker was secretly glad that Dr. Barrett had returned just thirty minutes after their conversation and that disastrous kiss. He had tried to suppress the friction between them by engaging a talk with their host and savior, talks about when they could learn about whatever results there would be, and what other possible factors they could have missed.
“It’s just blood; maybe you need something more,” Ryker said, not looking at Alexia.
Dr. Barrett looked thoughtful as he ate the buttered vegetables that Alexia had made. It wasn’t bad. The kid hadn’t been taught to cook anyway, and it was a welcome exchange to have someone else cook for him.
“Kid, if I wanted something more, I’d want you two dead,” he said. “I’m just as pressured as you are; I feel you’re pressured by something. You need the results so you can be on your merry way, and I need results so I can prove how I was right all along and how Wallace was just an idiot,” he said good-naturedly. “Don’t worry, I’ve taken a few measures. I’ve even combined your DNA together from what rudimentary machines I have,” he grinned. “Splicing is the word.”
“They’ve never done that before between us…” Alexia suddenly spoke up, putting down her fork.
“Really? Didn’t they want to see how your DNA would mix with his?” Barrett asked. “Or maybe they did, but it was for a later program.”
“They took some blood from her to make the steroids. They knew they couldn’t clone werebeings or completely clone her blood’s properties.”
“That’s because they’re idiots,” Dr. Barrett declared. “They’re either idiots, or they’re like Edith. She kept a lot of what she theorized to herself, even sent me some stuff. It took months to piece it together, but I got inside information. If they found her out, they would have still killed her. In a way, I’m glad she died in that fire instead of being executed.”
“I didn’t want her to die,” Alexia whispered. “I think, I think I’ll rest for a bit. I’m tired,” she announced in a bigger voice.
Dr. Barrett nodded, observing her. She seemed edgy. Did she feel sick or something? He looked at Ryker, but Ryker continued eating, ignoring Alexia as she walked past him, heading for his cramped study.
Alexia didn’t bother changing her clothes; it was something she had sort of learned from Ryker. In the event of an attack, she would be well-dressed for the cold… She’d brushed her teeth rigorously earlier, so rigorously that it’d caused her gums to bleed. Temperature had dropped, she knew, so she took the blanket and wrapped it around herself, wondering if Ryker was still going to sleep beside her tonight.
She didn’t need to wait too long. Moments later, he shuffled in, the light casting strange shadows in the messy room. She heard him take off his shoes as he sat on the bed first, as if contemplating if he should sleep beside her. Finally, he laid his head down on the pillow.
“I don’t want you to suffer anymore. I’d want a happy life for you,” Ryker began. “Far away from all this.”
“It’s not up to you, now is it?” Alexia said.
Ryker breathed out. “It’s actually up to you. You just have to survive this.”
“I’m not doing very well at surviving without you.”
“Until you do, I’m here. I’ll still be with you even if you don’t need me anymore,” Ryker told her, looking at the dark ceiling.
“I’ll always need you,” Alexia told him.
At that moment, Ryker felt that his kiss had been justified. Perhaps, she felt something for him, and he hoped it wasn’t pity. Perhaps, she felt the need to reciprocate his efforts. It was a sad thought, and it was something he wanted to push away. It would only bother him, and he had to prioritize their survival.
He took a breath, closing his eyes. Despite those thoughts, hearing Alexia say that felt great; it felt light on his chest. “Get some sleep,” he said, trying not to smile.
“I think you’re s
miling,” Alexia told him.
“I’m trying not to,” Ryker told her, biting his lower lip to prevent a smile from forming.
He was about to hold Alexia’s hand when Dr. Barrett burst into the room, flipping on the light switch. Ryker got up, bewildered at first. “You have to see this,” he said excitedly.
Alexis was as confused as Ryker was, but they decided to follow him back to the basement. The room was messier than they had seen it earlier; a flurry of activity and brainstorming had obviously happened.
“It’s not much,” Barrett said excitedly. “If it’s ever decided that they clone you to produce the werebeing soldiers they want, they’ll have to remove DNA from your reproductive parts,” he looked at Alexia briefly, absorbed in his discourse, “then they’ll transplant it to a mammary epithelial cell from a healthier, if possible, werebeing female, and then place those transplanted constituents into a surrogate female, human or otherwise.”
“What do you mean?” Ryker frowned, trying not to imagine Alexia in more pain now that Dr. Barret was talking about cloning.
“It means, if they take Alexia back, her parts can be harvested to make army after army, with what existing parts she will have left. But it also means that the surrogate female has to carry something entirely different. It could mean a werebeing is formed inside the belly.”
Ryker looked at Barrett in horror. “What?” So, she was still destined for a damned slaughterhouse if they ever found out her recent changes would make cloning viable…
Barrett sat down, overwhelmed by the recent medical discovery. He could have won an award for this and returned to the graces of the Caledon regime. He could get his life back on track, his diplomas, his certificates, the lab and the lab machines that he desired. He looked at the two youngsters in front of him and sighed.
“I also found another thing, still inconclusive. I combined what I could from your blood; call it cross-species cloning since Ryker here is a werebeing, after all, and I found that your DNA could be added to the possible clone. Essentially, you two would be like a factory. They’d extract what they need from you, and then they could keep making weresoldiers, stronger and better than before.”