"Thank you," she said softly. "I-I will always love you." Opening the door, she slid out into the dark corridor. As she closed the door, she felt she was closing away a part of her life that she feared she'd never again be strong enough to take out and remember.
Running barefoot down the corridors, she found her way back to her room. It was only with the click of her own door that her voice broke through. Choked sobs filled the room as she flung herself onto her bed. Dragging the covers over herself until she was completely hidden, she hugged one pillow to her chest and her tears soaked another. She swore she would never again make a single resolution, for even when she kept them, they just hurt—they hurt far, far too much to bear.
*****
Valerie's eyes were still closed in sleep as she shivered. Her arm reached out to draw Rosie closer, to make sure the young woman was not chilly as well. After reaching, and then reaching further, she slowly opened her eyes. It took another few moments for her to realize that Rosie was not just lying a bit further away from her—the space in front of her was empty. Turning slowly so as not to disturb Grant, whose arm was thrown across her waist, she lifted herself up. Perhaps Rosie had moved to lie next to her Daddy, to enjoy his warmth. When she didn't see her, Valerie slid out from under Grant's arm and out of the bed. The bathroom, of course, Rosie simply had needed to potty. Knocking softly on the door, she heard nothing. Opening it, she stepped inside. Not wanting to believe the room was empty, she looked behind the door as if to discover Rosie hiding there, her hand over her mouth to stifle a giggle as she played hide and seek.
No longer able to pretend, and no longer able to hide her concern, Valerie ran from the bathroom, her eyes scanning the room. Jumping onto the bed, she shook Grant's shoulder. "Grant, wake up—please, honey, wake up." She continued shaking until he groaned and opened his eyes.
"Val? What's wrong? What time is it?"
"Rosie is gone! Grant, our little girl is gone!"
Grant pushed himself up, his eyes roaming about the room. "What do you mean she's gone? Did you check the bathroom, maybe—"
"Of course I checked the bathroom. I'm telling you she isn't here!" Valerie's voice cracked as her eyes filled. "Grant, where could she have gone? Why?"
"Hush, let me think," he said, rubbing his hand across his eyes. "I'm sure there is an explanation. What time is it?"
"Early, it's still dark. I got chilled and was reaching for her but she wasn't in the bed. I checked the bathroom and then thought maybe she was playing a game, but that's just stupid. God, how long has she been missing? She was so tired last night. Oh, Grant, do you think… did she just leave because… because I spanked her so hard last night?"
He sat up and pulled her to him. "Hush. No, Valerie, I'm sure that's not it, sweetheart. She's been spanked by both of us before. Last night was no different."
"But I paddled her! You saw her bottom—it was so hot and red."
"Valerie, stop. You are panicking and worrying about something that is useless. She was in bed not too long ago. I woke up, used the bathroom and put another coating of arnica on her. Her bottom was already paling. There were no bruises—you paddled her, Valerie, you didn't beat her. I whipped her far harder the other day. Stop blaming yourself—we all know she gets off on spankings, her pussy drips just as yours does when I've disciplined you. If it had been too much, Rosie would have used her safeword, or a paddle would have been on her hard limits. No, she didn't leave because her ass is a bit sore."
"Then why?" Valerie forced herself to take several deep breaths, finally leaning against his chest. "We waited too long, Grant. We should have asked her to stay last night."
He had a feeling his wife was right. Looking around again, as if hoping Rosie might suddenly materialize out of thin air, he saw the bear and frowned. The last time he'd seen it had been in Rosie's arms as she slept. Patting Valerie's arm, he released her and slipped out of bed. He walked to the chair and saw the suitcases on the floor. "Oh shit," he said softly, and then saw the pink ribbon hanging from the bear's arm.
"Grant?"
"She is gone," he admitted, picking up the stuffed animal and turning back to the bed, his finger stroking the ribbon. "She must have seen the suitcases and thought we were just going to leave today. Christ, I'm such a fucking idiot! You are right—I should have talked to her last night. We should have asked her to stay."
Valerie didn't realize tears were sliding down her cheeks, her eyes locked on the charm that was swinging from the ribbon. "Oh, God, she-she didn't even say goodbye. I-I had so hoped. I'd prayed she'd want us. What… what are we going to do?"
Grant put the bear back on the chair and went to the bed, pulling her into his arms. She sobbed against his chest. He'd been afraid of this. Despite his words of caution, his wife was sobbing, her heart broken. "Shhh, honey, I'm so sorry. I thought she loved us as much as we loved her. I'm so sorry, Val."
The couple held onto each other, Grant's chin resting on the top of Valerie's head as she cried out her disappointment. His heart ached as pictures of Rosie on the auction block, her hand lifting her gown, her little bottom wagging in those pink ruffled panties, the sight of her in the room as she sat and waited for them to come get her, ran through his mind. He remembered the look on her face as she took her first spankings, the embarrassment she'd tried to hide as he explained what her hard limit really meant. Memories of her awakening to the touch and love from another woman as her first bath was given replayed in his mind. Her trust as he had shaved her, and the natural and loving responses she had given as Valerie loved her for the first time filled his heart. God, he'd never forget the joy of watching her with Valerie, the love the two women shared so innocent, so breathtakingly beautiful. He would never forget the feeling of sliding into her, the look of awe and arousal on her face that showed her every thought, her every emotion. He almost broke down remembering the feel of her small fingers around his—drawing strength from her Daddy while she took a very hard paddling from her Mommy—then the look of bliss on her face as she floated into sub space for the first time. Her screams of pleasure as she was driven to climax again and again, the look she gave when she was praised and complimented.
Putting Valerie away from him, he shook his head. "No, she is not going to be allowed to do this. I… we need to find her. We need to tell her how we feel. Valerie, we are going to find her and sit her down and explain that we love her. If she doesn't want us, then we will have to accept that. But, by God, we are not leaving here without asking her."
"But she left… she took off her collar and left."
"Yes, she did. But, honey, think—would the Rosie we love do such a thing if she knew how much it would hurt either of us?" At the slight shake of her head, Grant continued. "No. I think she left because she thought we were leaving. I should have put the fucking suitcases back last night. She woke up, saw them, saw the garment bags and thought we were just going to wake up, get dressed and say 'thanks for the memories, kiddo.'" Valerie began to calm down as he continued to get more upset. "I am going to find her and I'm going to blister her ass for running away."
They hurriedly dressed in the clothes they had worn upon arrival. Grant grabbed the collar off Mr. Bear's arm, stuffing it into his pants pocket. They left their room, the corridors empty in the very early morning. "We'll check the cafeteria. The bus doesn't arrive for some time, and I rather doubt she's packed her suitcase and is sitting outside in this cold. I'm betting she's off sipping a cup of coffee."
Valerie prayed he was right as they walked quickly down the halls. They checked room after room… but none of them contained Rosie. They even begin to check any rooms that were open, in case she had decided to wait for the bus in one of them. The corridors began to fill with people going to breakfast, and still they saw no signs of her. Finally, Grant and Valerie checked outside. Though some people were milling about, none were Rosie.
"God, we don't even know what she'd be wearing," Valerie said, her arms wrapped around her torso as
they walked down the steps to scan the yard.
"It's too cold to be running around," Grant said. "Let's go back and get our coats. Maybe for some reason she decided she wanted to walk through the maze again. I hope she runs into a whole herd of those furries and they decide to keep her for their pet—at least until her Daddy can rescue her."
Valerie could hear the pain in his voice, her hand slipping into his.
Once they were in warm coats, they ran to the maze and through it, only to discover that nothing but the wind was moving through the hedges. Dejected, they walked back to the Castle. She was gone. How she had disappeared so completely they didn't know. Their Rosie, not even her true name, had vanished without a single trace. Returning to their room, they finished their packing, placing their suitcases by the door for the porters to pick up and put on the bus.
Grant took out some paper and a pen and wrote a note, and Valerie added her own words. Placing the sheets into an envelope, Grant sealed it and made to slip it into his pocket. Feeling resistance, he pulled out the pink collar. Wrapping it in his fist, he closed his eyes. "God, I love you, Rosie. I pray you are happy wherever you are."
Valerie's tears returned as she heard his words and watched him give the charm a kiss before slipping it once more around the bear's wrist. She took his extended hand and the couple left the room that had brought them such incredible joy with incredible sadness in their hearts.
*****
Rosa rolled over and threw back the sheet. She ached all over, and even though she had desperately tried to sink into the oblivion of sleep, she knew it was a lost cause. If she stayed in her room, all it would do was serve to allow her to sink deeper into the depression that was threatening to consume her. Forcing herself to her feet, she gave a last sob as she removed Grant's t-shirt. Lifting it, she used a sleeve to wipe her eyes and inhaled his scent for the last time. Tucking it beneath her pillow, she made the bed and went into the bathroom.
After showering, she brushed her teeth and dried her hair, pinning it into the bun she normally wore. Attempting to conceal the circles beneath her eyes, she finally gave that up as useless as well and went to dress. If she couldn't stand the solitude of her room, the best thing she could do was surround herself with people. She would return to the place that was her home, though she knew the moment she walked through the Nursery doors she would have to consciously fight back her tears. It wouldn't do to show her misery to the happy clients who continued to play out their fantasies.
Pinning the white cap on her head, she smoothed down the uniform skirt; the Little she had been transformed into the proper Nanny who cared for the children. Taking a deep breath, she stepped out of her room and returned to her life before her resolutions.
Bess had just stepped into the Nursery when she heard the door opening. Expecting to see a Daddy or Mommy coming to check on their sleeping Little, she was shocked to see Rosa. What was even more shocking was how awful her friend looked.
"Rosa, what are you doing here?" Bess asked, walking quickly to her friend.
"I… I came to work."
"What happened? Why? I thought…" She stopped speaking when Rosa began to cry. "Oh, honey, I'm so sorry." Gathering her into her arms, Bess gently rocked her, just as she would one of her charges. "Come on, let's get you out of here." Keeping her arm around Rosa's waist, she guided her towards the door.
"Is something the matter?" Mr. Collins asked as he entered.
"I'm not sure, Sir," Bess said respectfully. "I need to talk with Rosa. I'll be back as soon as I can, I promise."
Mr. Collins took a good look at the two women. There was no doubt in his mind that something was terribly wrong. "Certainly, Bess. Please, if you need help, promise you'll come find me."
When Bess promised she would, he opened the door and watched as Bess guided Rosa through it. He liked and enjoyed working with the two women. They were very good employees and treated every client with respect and genuine care. He wondered if he should perhaps call Marshall, but decided to wait to see what the trouble was. There was no reason to cause the girls to get into any trouble if it was something he could take care of. He'd give Bess a chance to come to him.
Bess led Rosa through the hall, nodding at some of their coworkers as they passed, but not stopping to chat. Rosa never lifted her eyes from the floor, allowing Bess to simply guide her. They entered one of the break rooms and Bess led Rosa to a table, easing her down into a chair. "Stay here, I'll get us some coffee. My treat—a Venti sized caramel, right?" When Rosa didn't even respond, Bess began to truly worry. Nothing could usually bring a smile to Rosa's face faster than the mention of her favorite beverage.
Placing the steaming cup before Rosa, Bess took a sip of her own. "Honey, you are really beginning to scare me. Please, Rosa, it's me. Tell me what happened? You… you aren't hurt, are you? Do I need to get the nurse?"
Rosa shook her head and reached into her apron pocket for some tissues. Blowing her nose and wiping her eyes for the millionth time, she tried to push away the memory of her parents taking her to see Nurse Nancy. God, she wished it would just take something as simple as taking her temperature to make her well. If the nurse placed a stethoscope on her heart now, surely she would hear it breaking. When she felt tears well again, she pressed the palms of her hands against her eyes to keep them at bay.
"Rosa, if you don't start talking, I'm getting every freakin person I know. I swear to God, I will! In fact, if you don't, I'm going to start screaming the name of that white round veggie so loud that every soul in the Castle comes running. Do you want that? Do I need to tell Master Marshall that those people hurt you?"
"No!" Rosa almost shouted her first word since being seated. Looking up, she shook her head. "No, they didn't hurt me."
"Bullshit. You're white as a ghost, shaking in your boots, and crying your eyes out, so don't bother trying that lie. Now, tell me everything. What the fuck is going on?" Bess was no longer willing to sit quietly. Every passing moment had her getting madder and madder. She wanted to kick herself for allowing Rosa to attend the auction. God, nothing, no amount of freedom to finally explore her desires was worth this wretched aftermath. If Grant and Valerie had hurt her, well, she'd make it her duty to see that they never stepped a single toe onto Castle property again!
Rosa saw the determination to fight running across Bess's face. It made her realize just how awful she must look, and how selfish she was being. It wasn't Bess's fault that she was so horribly sad. Wiping her face again, she tucked the tissue back into her pocket and reached out to cup her hands around the warmth of the cup.
"It's me, Bess. It's all my fault. I should have never let my dreams go so far." When Bess began to open her mouth, Rosa shook her head. "No, that's not what I mean. I will never really regret dreaming. I will never truly regret stepping up onto that stage and being bought. G-Grant and Valerie were everything I could ever have wanted. They were both far more wonderful than I imagined. I-I just wanted them more than they wanted me."
"Oh, Rosa," Bess whispered, reaching out to take her hand. "Oh, honey, I am so sorry. God… I-I don't know… are you sure? I mean, we've seen hundreds of clients come to play. But honey, I've never seen two who seemed to really care more deeply about their Little. It certainly didn't look like they were simply playing with a submissive they happened to buy."
"Yes, I'm sure. They were all packed up and ready to go this morning when I got up. They packed last night while I was asleep."
"But what did they say? I mean, they didn't even want to stay until Monday?"
Rosa shook her head. "I guess not. I would have stayed with them… hell, forget Monday. I wanted to stay with them for the rest of my life. I have never felt like I belonged before. They… they were everything I could have dreamed of and much, much more."
"Did you tell them that?" Bess said, attempting to wrap her brain around the fact that the scenes she had witnessed the three playing had simply been that. Surely she hadn't been so wrong? She had even
accepted six strokes of Master Marshall's cane and six more from Mr. Collins because she'd been so sure the three were a family that she had broken a rule. True, she had run back to grab the thermos, but when it was too late, she had let the game play out, never once blaming Rosa—after all, she was a Little at the time, and Bess was the adult. "Rosa, I can't believe they'd just leave without saying a word. I mean, the bus isn't even here yet. Where are they? Maybe you could go—"
"No! They… they didn't leave, well, not that I know of."
"Then why are you here? Why are you dressed like you are going to work?"
Rosa sighed loudly. "I left early when they were still sleeping. I went to my room. They have no idea I work here. It would have been awkward for us to be just sitting in the room when the porters came to get their bags. I-I couldn't stand that. I-I couldn't stand to say goodbye. I would have made a huge fool out of myself. I can see myself begging for them to love me. I just want to get back to work and try to forget."
Bess shook her head. She honestly couldn't believe that anyone wouldn't love Rosa. Her heart ached, but she didn't know what to do now that she knew Rosa wasn't physically in danger. "Honey, you can't work—not today. No-one expected you back, at least not until Monday, but honestly, none of us expected you ever to work with us again. I still think you should try to find them…."
When Rosa shook her head violently, she sighed again. "Okay, but honey, you have to give yourself time to grieve. You will just be miserable and scare the Littles if you cry every time one of them asks for her mommy or daddy."
When The Gavel Falls (Masters of the Castle) Page 59
