“Take care,” she said, reverting to Stern Nurse Mode. “More like save lives, Mr. Maid. Why are you here? I thought you were joining the army or something.”
“Or something,” he repeated, putting a hand over his heart. The grin faded a bit—just a bit—as if those words had hit him a little too hard.
Uh-oh. There’s a story there, she thought.
But he bounced back right away. “You do remember me,” he said. “I’m touched.”
“Tetched maybe,” Tiana said with a laugh.
The grin may have faded but the mischievous gleam in his eyes had not. “Life. You know. You have a plan and sometimes it falls through.” He paused, just for a beat or two, then added, “I went with Army National Guard instead of active duty. Got a great job as a civilian here at the Corps of Engineers.”
“Oh. Okay,” she said. “Well. That’s good.” She put her hands back on the shopping cart handle and felt something brush by her at hip level. The whirling child had reappeared, the pirouettes now alternating with mini jetés, and his flustered mom gave Tiana a glance of apology as she scooped her budding ballet dancer up into her arms. She needed to get home. Wednesday night was some prime Netflix watching.
“Sorry,” the boy’s mother said as he thrust a sticky handful of Gummi Bears toward Tiana. “Caleb, I swear...”
Tiana laughed. “Not a problem,” she said. She smiled in solidarity as she watched the mom plop her squirming child into the shopping cart and buckle him in. The struggle is real—don’t I know it. That reminded her. She needed to get herself moving so she could be back home before Lily went to bed. She winced as she watched Caleb rub the handful of candy against the cart handle and then stuff the entire wad into his mouth. Ah, well, it’ll give his immune system something to do.
As Caleb and his mom disappeared around the corner, Tiana remembered Mr. Hottie Maid’s name. DeShawn Adams! He was still watching her, his mouth twisted up into that grin, suggesting he was barely holding back on a snarky comment. Mmm-hmm. He may have lost the little goatee he’d had when she last saw him, but he was still the perfect picture of tall, dark and handsome. His hair was short and once again she considered how not even the light jacket he was wearing against Charleston’s February chill could hide that body. Tall and strong and muscled and probably even a really good guy once you got past his Mr. Smarty Pants facade. Ugh. Stop.
“Yeah,” she said, tapping her fingers on her cart. “Well, hey, DeShawn, nice to see you, but I do need to get going.” She gave him a little wave, then remembered. “Oh, wait. The avocados.” She gestured toward his basket. “I was going to say. Get one that’s ripe now and one that’s going to be ripe soon. That’s how my mom always told me to do it.”
He nodded, that twisted-up smirk still concealing a zinger, and then he reached into the pile, plucked out not one but two green avocados and placed them in his basket beside the pair of ripe ones.
One of Tiana’s eyebrows went up.
“Hey,” DeShawn said, “I really like guacamole. Now and later.”
Tiana groaned. “Later, Man Maid.”
His laugh was rich and warm. It was a good kind of laugh, a hey-we-just-connected laugh, and it followed her as she tried to make her exit and slip on down an aisle. “Hey, Tiana?” DeShawn called out. “Speaking of later...”
She turned just long enough to give him a decidedly chilly look. “Later,” she repeated. “Good to see you.” She regretted the aisle she’d turned into as soon as she chose it, but there was no way to turn around now without looking flustered. She so wanted to appear casual but she felt like she was going to trip over her own feet. Was she overtired? It had been a long shift at the hospital. Was he still watching her? He was still as infuriating as ever and she had enough on her plate right now. New job. New city. Settling in with Lily. Her mother had moved to Charleston with them to help her, so that was another adjustment. Living with her mother again made her feel like she was still fifteen years old rather than a grown woman, a working professional. The last thing she needed was a smart-ass man on top of that tangled knot. She looked around, one hand up as if trying to decide on an item. When she finally looked back, trying to make it appear nonchalant, he was gone. Good. She looked at the shelf in front of her. Nothing but applesauce, fruit cups and dates. She picked up a box, inspected it. What? No. No way. She definitely did not need any dates, ha-ha. Even though Man Maid was super yummy.
What was wrong with her?
* * *
LILY, HER ARMS wide and a huge dimply-cheeked smile on her face, was running toward her as soon as she opened the front door. “Momma! You’re home!”
Tiana dipped down to eye level with her child, smiling but serious, and put a hand up in the universal sign of stop right there. “Hold up, Lily,” she said. “What’s the rule?”
Lily skidded to a halt and her little face became serious. “No hugging in nurse clothes,” she recited. Tiana’s heart skipped a beat, she loved this girl so much. Lily standing there in her lavender pajamas trying to play at wearing a stern face. Was it possible for anyone to be so adorable?
As much as Tiana wanted to scoop her daughter up and squeeze her tight, the reality was there could be anything lurking on her scrubs after twelve hours in the emergency department. And this shift had been all kinds of hot messiness, the kind of stuff usually reserved for the night shift when the moon was full. Old guy coughing like he was going to heave a wet lung across the back of the hand that he held halfheartedly in front of his face. A gunshot wound rolled in by ambulance; just a kid, really, late teens, lying there stunned, groaning, as the paramedic—Rachel, one of the best—called out the particulars to Dr. Dean. The kid had made it. Dr. Dean could go stone-cold in the worst of traumas and direct every person in the room with a flat precision that was almost eerie to behold. What else? The toddler with the telltale inspiratory whoop. The dude who walked in wanting a sperm count, of all things. She was still shaking her head over that one.
A whirlwind, that’s what the last twelve-plus hours of her life had been. She sighed. And that wasn’t even counting the awkwardness that was the ill-advised stop at the grocery store on her way home.
But...that was then. You leave that there, if you can, and you can because you have to. That was the first thing she’d learned after nursing school. It was required, for your own sanity. Nurse Tiana needed to take a breath, let go and ease back into being Mommy. She smiled and blew air kisses to Lily as she put the bags down on the counter.
“I could have picked up groceries, Tee,” her mother said as she entered the kitchen. “Go get changed. I’ll put these away.” Vivian took the bags from her and placed them near the sink. She could have at least tried not to shake her head side to side as she inspected each purchase. “Lot of salt in these,” she said as she shook a pack of corn chips en route to the pantry. She pursed her lips as she reached back in the bag, rummaging around. “Sugar, sugar, salt. Oh, well, now, here’s a vegetable. Not bad!”
“I know,” Tiana said, bristling. “I just wanted to grab a couple of things.” She sensed Lily reaching to pat her waist and she caught herself just in time.
“Germy-wormy,” Lily said, wearing a pout. “I remember.”
“Oh, sweetie, I’m sorry. I’ll get cleaned up right now, okay? Then we can cuddle.”
Lily nodded, then asked if she would read her a bedtime story. Tiana smiled and told her that was all she wanted in the whole world. And it was the truth.
The shower ran long and hot, easing the knots bunched up in her back and shoulders, and she stood there, indulging herself in the luxury of it. Say what you wanted about this place, the water heater alone was worth it—it just kept churning out a steady, soothing rush of heat. When she finally stepped out of the shower, she felt 99 percent human again.
After slipping into her favorite Hello Kitty sleep pants—shut up, she
could if she wanted—and an old, comfy T-shirt, Tiana let herself relax. She curled up with her little girl and opened up one of her favorites. She remembered her own mother reading it to her when she herself was little.
As she read the story to Lily—the poor girl was exhausted; her eyes struggled to stay open even as she nodded along with the rhythm of the words—Tiana reflected on how the peace and comfort of home was so necessary. A refuge. A need right up there with food and water. You had to have a place where you felt safe and loved, where you could just be you.
“Are you going to be here all night?” Lily asked in a low mumble. Her cheek was already pressed to her pillow and her eyes were shut.
“Sure, honey,” Tiana said. “I will.” She brushed her fingertips along Lily’s shoulder. Lily nodded. By the look of it, she’d be out soon, sleeping soundly.
Sound sleep, now there’s an idea, Tiana thought. She’d have to get some of that for herself.
“Do you have to go to work tomorrow, Mommy?” Lily asked as Tiana placed the book on the bedside table and pulled the comforter up to her daughter’s chin.
“Not tomorrow, honey. I get to take you to school and pick you up after. Maybe we can go on a special date, just the two of us. What do you think about that?”
Lily snuggled down deep in the blankets. “Fun. Mommy?”
“Yes, love?”
“I was thinking. I don’t want a fish pet. I want a kitten pet.”
Tiana kissed Lily’s forehead. “We’ll talk about that later.” Lily murmured as she turned toward her pillow. Tiana and slipped out of the room, pulling the door almost, but not quite shut.
Standing there in the hallway, she considered how much had changed since she’d first stepped foot into nursing school. Talk about whirlwinds! And then there was the day she’d sat in her car in utter despair after taking her boards, sure that she’d tanked it and that it had been all for nothing. But it turned out she’d done okay. Better than okay, really. Now her workdays were filled with helping other people deal with the worst day of their lives. She was still in her orientation phase, working under the guidance of an experienced nurse. The skills were easy to learn. Charting. Which doctor to call. All of those things were simple. What was hard was finding that line within herself: the line that allowed you to be a caring and compassionate nurse yet still keep your heart safe.
You can’t bleed for your patients or you’ll burn out in a year.
Those words, the first thing her preceptor had taught her, were the most difficult part of the job to master. Because she was a problem fixer. She wanted to fix every aspect of a patient’s life. But she couldn’t. She knew that. But it didn’t stop her from wanting to.
* * *
“I HAVE YOUR supper warmed up,” Vivian called from the kitchen.
Walking toward her, Tiana felt the fatigue of the day beginning to weigh her down. She put an arm around her mother, pulled her close. “Thanks, Mom.”
“Rough day?”
Tiana shrugged. “No more than usual.”
At the small dining room table, Tiana looked around at the apartment. She’d just moved her little family in a week ago, and it still seemed surreal. After years of cheap college apartments and two months in an extended-stay hotel while she began her orientation, it was certainly the nicest place she’d ever lived, even though the monthly payment about gave her heart failure. A small smile crossed her lips as she looked around. She could afford it though. Finally. Financial freedom was the ultimate freedom. Three bedrooms, hardwood floors, walk-in closets, granite-topped counters, sleek black brand-new appliances. She’d done this. Yeah, it was expensive, but she’d made it. Lily was in a great elementary school, living in a great town with endless opportunity. Everything she’d worked for when she left Lily with her mother and went away to school. Sometimes, she would stop and look around, still surprised she’d made it out the other side.
Her mother’s hand closed over hers as if she’d read her thoughts. “You’ve done well, Tee. I’m so proud of you.”
Squeezing her mother’s hand, she nodded. “We did it. Together. I couldn’t have done it without you. We did this, Mom.”
“The Three Musketeers. Now eat your food and go to bed.”
That made her laugh. “Okay, Mom.”
She took a few bites. Her mother could cook, that was a truth. Even when she followed the recipe perfectly, her food didn’t taste like her mother’s. Tiana suspected secret ingredients.
“Lily wants a kitten now instead of a fish.”
“Ha! She’d rather go for furry and snuggly than for scaly and slimy? Imagine that!” Vivian mimed locking her lips and throwing away a key. “Not even going to touch that battle. Good luck.”
Letting out a tired sigh, Tiana finished the rest of her food. As much as she hated to admit it, Lily had inherited her determined streak. When Lily put her foot down, crossed her arms, and held her chin high, she looked like a mini CEO getting ready for a meeting with the Board of Directors. In pajamas! Tiana shook her head, smiled, and sighed again. As hard as she had to be, tried to be, that girl had her heart wrapped around her little finger. The littlest boss.
But a kitten, gah.
Maybe a few more trips to the aquarium? Find some super enthusiastic intern who could spin tales of clever clownfish, sunlight sparkling across rainbow-colored scales just below the surface, mermaids, sails and all the wonders of the deep blue sea?
Hey, it was worth a try.
Copyright © 2017 by Janet Lee Nye
ISBN-13: 9781488017230
Breakup in a Small Town
Copyright © 2017 by Kristina Knight
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