by Geonn Cannon
“I don’t want you to see me.”
“Humor me.” Dale nodded slightly, so Ari gently guided her closer to the porch. She hooked a finger under Dale’s chin and forced her head up. “Look at me.”
Dale squeezed her eyes shut. “I can’t.”
“Look at me,” Ari whispered.
Dale opened her eyes and looked at Ari, immediately flinching as if the sight caused her pain. “I’m so sorry. For whatever I say in the future or anything I do, I want you to know I’m so sorry.”
Ari shushed her, brushed her hand over Dale’s cheek. “Last time you called me a mutt after reading the essays. You just called me puppy. You said Mom, not Gwen.”
“It didn’t happen immediately last time,” Dale said.
“Okay,” Ari said. “But I’m looking at you right now, and all I see is fear and shame. I don’t see any hatred. I don’t see disgust. I see a woman who thinks she did something horrible. How do you actually feel?”
“Sick to my stomach.”
“Right. Any rage? Any urge to run away from me?”
Dale took a deep breath. “I don’t want to hurt you.”
“That’s not what I asked.”
“I want to hold you so badly,” Dale sobbed. “But if something snaps in me...”
Ari stepped closer and wrapped her arms around Dale. “I know it won’t. I have complete and utter faith in you.”
“I wish I did.” Dale’s arms hesitantly slipped around Ari’s waist and pulled her close. “I had to do it, Ari. He needed to think he could trust me, and if I hesitated... I had to get her home. I had to do it to get Mom home.”
“I know,” Ari said. “You did good, baby. You did amazing. I’m so proud of you.”
Dale lifted her head and looked at the house. “Are they okay?”
“Go see for yourself.”
“I can’t go in there, Ari. I’m a time bomb.”
“Would you stop? You’re not.”
Dale stepped away from Ari. “You can’t know that.”
“I do,” Ari said. “My faith in you isn’t blind, Dale. It comes from years of experience. It comes from watching you standing up to do what’s right. Not just for me, not just for canidae, but for everyone. You’re a good person. You beat this brainwashing once, and this time you saw it coming so I know you didn’t let it get any hooks in you. Last time when it tried to make you a huntress, the only thing you even came close in succeeded at was running away.” She cupped Dale’s face in both her hands. “You are Dale Elizabeth Frye, and a book can make you say awful things, but it cannot change who you are inside. That gives me more hope than anything else in this whole mess. The essays might make more hunters if they get released, but I don’t think we have to worry about it changing every single person who comes in contact with it.”
Dale sniffled. “Dale Elizabeth Frye... Willow.”
Ari bit back a gasp. “I, uh... I wasn’t... sure. We hadn’t talked about it.”
Dale shrugged and said, “Well, if Gwen and Milo are going to be the Willows... I don’t want to feel like the odd one out when we have dinner together.” She wiped at her eyes. “Hyphenated. I think? Maybe just on paperwork... I don’t know. We can talk about it later.”
“Yeah.” Ari tucked Dale’s hair behind her ear. “Are you okay? If you want to be alone I can drive you home, sit with you--”
“I want to see Mom and Milo.”
“Then let’s go see them.”
She took Dale’s hand and squeezed it before leading her away from the car. She went in through the laundry room and stopped in the kitchen, which was now empty. The living room was also vacant, and Ari felt a twinge of concern.
“They were here just a second ago.” She started forward, but Dale reached out with her free hand to grab Ari’s elbow to pull her back. “What...”
“Uh, puppy.”
Dale nodded at the floor, where the jacket Gwen had been wearing was lying in a crumpled ball. Ari frowned at it.
“Mom was wearing that.”
“Puppy,” Dale said again. “That’s all she was wearing.”
Ari looked at her. Dale looked at the ceiling. Ari looked up as well, and finally figured out what had happened.
“Oh, for crying out loud,” Ari groaned.
Dale chuckled. “What do you expect? They were held prisoner, haven’t seen each other in ages, they’re married now. Technically, in all the ways that matter. And I’m surprised it took them this long to get upstairs. I still want to see Gwen, to apologize to her for how I acted in the car. But it would be weird to just sit down here and wait, right?”
“A little, yeah.” Ari walked away, as if putting distance between herself and the jacket would erase what it meant. “I was going to go wander around by the viaduct to see if I could find any clues about where they’ve been hiding, but now that Mom’s here, we can pick her brain. And seeing her again might make Milo remember something useful. So I feel like waiting is the best course of action. But... yeah. A little weird.” Ari looked down at Dale’s hand in hers, then glanced over her shoulder at the stairs. “Would it be... less weird or a lot more weird if we used the time constructively?”
Dale furrowed her brow.
“My old room is still fully furnished,” Ari said.
Dale’s eyebrows arched up. “Are you serious?”
Ari shrugged. “You’re worried about being a time bomb. What better way to prove you’re still a big wolf fan?”
“Your mother and Milo will be right down the hall.” Dale was whispering as if they were in the same room. “Are you honestly... implying we...”
Ari raised an eyebrow.
Dale slowly, reluctantly, began to smile. She stroked her hand over Ari’s bicep. “I have spent a few nights in your bedroom up there, and it never really felt right without you there with me. I guess it would be nice to make amends for that.”
Ari started walking backward toward the stairs.
Dale groaned and let herself be led. “Okay, but seriously, how good is a wolf’s hearing...?”
“Honestly?” Ari said, looking toward one bedroom as she guided Dale to the other. “After everything those two have been through, I’d be surprised if they remember the rest of the house exists.”
***
Gwen pressed her lips to the inside of Milo’s thigh and let the kiss linger before she moved up to her stomach. Milo shivered and gasped, and Gwen smiled as she kissed a spot just above the sharp line of her hip. The first time they had sex, Milo had been the aggressor. Gwen hadn’t had sex in years at that point, had barely even thought about it, and the idea of being with a woman wasn’t even something she’d considered. After a few hours of debauchery and some soul-searching, Gwen discovered she was bisexual, but the label was just a formality by that point. She may have been attracted to men and women, but she only had eyes for one woman in particular.
And now that woman was flushed and breathing heavily under her. Gwen brushed her hair over the sweaty curves as she stretched up, pressing a kiss to Milo’s slack but quickly responsive lips. Milo cupped the back of Gwen’s head, raked her fingers through her hair, and wrapped her legs around Gwen’s waist to pull her closer. When the kiss ended, it was only so Gwen could explore the curve of Milo’s throat. Milo continued threading Gwen’s hair through her fingers, and Gwen was hypnotized by the repetitive petting.
“The long hair looks good on you,” Milo whispered.
“It drove me crazy at first,” Gwen said, and kissed Milo’s collarbone. “It probably looks like a rat’s nest. I haven’t washed it in forever.”
“I love it.” Milo grabbed a handful and draped it over her face, inhaling deeply.
Gwen laughed and sat up to flip the hair away. “Already sick of looking at me, Millicent?”
“Never,” Milo pulled Gwen to her for another kiss. “Thought I lost you.”
“I thought so, too.” Gwen closed her eyes and rested her forehead against Milo’s. “I could hear you sometimes. Wh
en they... did things. The experiments. I wanted to knock down those walls. It kills me that I couldn’t help you.”
“That’s why they did it,” Milo said. “I heard you, too. They offered to go easier on you if I cooperated and did whatever they asked of me. I almost did. So many times.”
“They made the same promise to me,” Gwen said. “They would have made us do all kinds of awful things and then thrown the agreement out whenever it didn’t suit them anymore.”
“I know,” Milo said. “Doesn’t help.”
Gwen repositioned herself, bracing one hand on the headboard as she put the other between them. “How about this?” she whispered. “Does this help?”
Milo groaned. Her eyes rolled back in her head, and she put her arms around Gwen as she lifted her hips to meet the touch. “It’s starting to...”
“Well,” Gwen kissed Milo’s cheek, then her lips. “You just let me know how long I need to keep going...”
“I’ll say when,” Milo gasped, letting her hands roam over Gwen’s back.
Gwen smiled and began moving, prepared to go as long as it took, even if she didn’t hear the word until morning.
***
Ari kissed the dimples in the small of Dale’s back. Dale hissed and arched her back, looking over her shoulder. Ari slowly kissed her way up Dale’s spine, eventually straddling her, eyes up to appreciate the way Dale’s hair fell across the side of her face. Dale twisted as Ari stretched and they kissed, and Ari’s hands went around Dale’s sides to cup her breasts. Dale moaned and brushed her lips over Ari’s cheek, up toward her eye.
“Any urges to hurt me?” Ari whispered.
“Not unless we establish a safe word,” Dale said.
Ari grinned and kissed the corner of Dale’s mouth. “Seriously, though. Are you okay?”
Dale nodded and kept herself propped up with one arm, using the other to brush the hair out of her face. “I don’t feel anything like what I felt the first time I read the book. Not even a whisper. I think I’m okay. But keep an eye on me, okay?”
“How could I not, when the view is so pretty?”
“Well,” Dale said, “to immediately ruin a very sweet sentiment, I’m going to go take a shower while the other people in the house are still occupied.”
Ari lifted herself off Dale and rolled to the side. Dale sat on the edge of the bed and bent down to gather the bare minimum amount of clothes required to get to the bathroom.
“Don’t use up all the hot water.”
“Oh, I definitely need cold after everything you just did to me.” She fanned her face and looked back at Ari, who was stretched out on the mattress. “God, you’re pretty.”
Ari struck a pose, one arm behind her head and chest thrust out. “Private eye, werewolf, model.”
Dale bent down and kissed Ari again. “See you in a bit.”
“Okay.”
Ari dropped onto her back and stared at the ceiling, sweat drying on her skin. After a few minutes she heard the water rushing through the pipes. She considered staying there until Dale got back, thought about getting up to join her in the shower, but instead decided to go to the kitchen for some water. She put her undershirt back on along with her underwear and slipped out of the room, padding barefoot down the same hall she’d snuck down as a child.
In the kitchen she saw that the laptop on the counter was still on. She and Milo had been watching the livestream of Marin’s imprisonment when they were so gloriously interrupted. Ari turned the computer around and saw that Marin was curled on her side, the blankets by her feet, head bowed with her arms raised protectively over her head. As far as they could tell, the lights in the room were never turned off. She’d been held prisoner before. She’d been in cages. It wasn’t something she’d wish on anybody.
She finally looked away from the screen when she heard a creak behind her. She turned to see her mother standing in the kitchen doorway in a plain cotton robe. Her hair was wild, which revealed much more silver-gray streaks than Ari had noticed when Gwen had arrived earlier. They smiled awkwardly at each other before Ari went to the sink.
“Water?”
“Yes, please.”
Ari opened the cupboard and discovered that none of the dishes had been washed in months. She took out two glasses and rinsed off the dust before filling them.
“Everything okay with Dale?” Gwen asked, looking at the computer screen. Her lips were pressed tightly together, and Ari knew she was kicking herself for being free when their fellow prisoners had been left behind.
“Dale’s perfect,” Ari said. “She wanted to apologize for how she acted in the car with you. She was just concerned.”
Gwen looked up. “About what?”
Ari could tell her what Dale had done to get Hayden’s cooperation, but she couldn’t think of a way to phrase it that wouldn’t make Gwen feel guilty.
“It’s not important.” She brought the glass over to Gwen. “I managed to put her mind at ease.”
“Good.” Gwen looked past Ari at the back door. “Can we drink these outside? I... I need to be outdoors.”
“Oh, god, I’m sure you do,” Ari said.
They went out onto the back porch. Ari brushed a layer of leaves off the patio chairs and took one, gesturing for Gwen to take the other. Gwen paused and tilted her head back to take a deep, slow breath of the night air, a beatific smile playing on her face as the wind moved her hair.
“I haven’t been outside for months,” she whispered.
“Do you need to run?”
Gwen shook her head, then shrugged. “Actually, I most likely do. But I can’t guarantee the wolf would stop before hitting Canada. I need a little while to acclimate to being free before I hand over control like that.”
“Probably smart,” Ari said.
Gwen finally sat down and crossed one leg over the other. Ari couldn’t help but feel reduced to a teenager at moments like these. It was just the two of them, alone in the quiet, and all the years in between fell away until they were just mother and daughter. Ari drummed her fingers softly on the side of her glass and looked down at her bare feet. Gwen chuckled quietly and Ari looked up at her.
“What’s funny?”
“I never really pictured this moment,” Gwen said. “You and me, sitting out here in the middle of the night, with our wives in the house.”
Ari smiled. “Milo told you?”
“She did. I’m so happy for you, Ariadne. You chose well.”
Ari put one foot on top of the other, awkward and shy again. “At least you could have imagined me with a wife. What about you? With someone like Milo?”
Gwen laughed, loud and genuine, and looked up at the sky. “God. Millicent Duncan... She was so rough around the edges when I found her. I thought she was just some punk wolf who would do anything for a little money. Do you know what she did with the money I gave her for trying to break up you and Dale? She gave it away. To her pack. One of them was pregnant, the rest she just wanted to help. She barely kept any of it for herself. I didn’t expect to be in love with her. I didn’t think I even respected her. Surprise, surprise, she turned out to be a better person than I ever was. I’m lucky she chose me.”
“I think you both came out okay on that deal.”
Gwen smiled and sipped her water.
“Are you really okay, Mom?”
“Mm.” She considered the question. “Milo and I went through hell these past few months. I think it would be ridiculous to say we’re fine now. Milo obviously has a very long road to being completely fine. But I saw the woman I fell in love with upstairs, and I know she’s strong enough to find her way back. With the right people helping her. Helping us. I think we’ll bounce back.”
Ari nodded slowly as an odd feeling filled her chest. She barely had time to identify it before the balloon burst in the form of a shrill sob. She put one hand over her mouth and leaned forward, her closed eyes useless against the tears that came out of nowhere. She was trembling so hard she was afraid
she’d fall out of the chair, but suddenly her mother’s arms were around her.
“I gave up on you,” Ari managed to say. “I told Dale you were dead. I told her to stop holding out hope. I’m so sorry, Mom.”
Gwen shushed her. “It’s okay, Ariadne. It’s okay.”
Ari held her mother until she felt the unexpected touch of a third hand on her shoulder. She looked up and saw Dale, worry written all over her face, and twisted to embrace her instead. Dale cupped the back of Ari’s head, and Ari pressed her face into Dale’s stomach. Dale still smelled of soap and water from the shower, her hair wet and hanging loose around her face. She was wearing Ari’s overshirt, buttoned wrong and too tight in the chest, and Ari breathed deep to inhale their mingling scents.
“What happened?” Dale asked.
Gwen said, “She’s overwhelmed. It’s understandable. We’re all waiting to hit the wall, I think.”
Dale stroked Ari’s hair. “About that wall. Earlier...”
“Hush,” Gwen said. “I don’t need to know. You were there when I needed you, and that’s all that matters. Are you okay now?”
“Thanks to your daughter, yeah.”
Gwen smiled.
Ari sniffled and looked up, scooting to the side so Dale could squeeze into the chair next to her. “Does someone want to go get Milo so we can have the whole family here?”
“Don’t bother,” Milo said from the kitchen. She poured a glass of water for herself and one for Dale, bringing both out onto the porch. “Don’t even offer her a drink? Some wife you turned out to be.”
“Hey, I’m new at this. Not all of us could have a secret European ceremony.”
Milo bent down to kiss the top of Gwen’s head as she passed, sitting on the brick half-wall at the edge of the porch.
“I guess since we’re all here and we’ve all had a second to breathe, we might as well address the elephant in the room. Milo doesn’t remember where you were being held...”
“I know exactly where we were,” Gwen said.
Ari sat up straighter. “You do?”
“Of course I do. I’m sure Milo does, too, but with her memory issues...” She shrugged. “We were in an abandoned building on First Street, just before it becomes Dave Niehaus Way. Between the Seahawks and the Mariners.”
