“Well,” her father interrupted, “we don’t have to make a decision right now. We should give Margaret time to think about it.”
“Yes,” Margaret quickly said. Her eyes grew wide when she realized they might misunderstand her to mean that she’d marry Joseph and take on the responsibility of four—four!—boys. “Yes, I’ll think about it.”
It wasn’t the answer he wanted, Margaret realized when she looked from the boys and back to their father, but in no way was she prepared for this. Beside her, Jessica smiled at the boys. Had this been Jessica, Jessica would have married Joseph right away—if for no other reason than to be a mother to the children. Well, there was no doubt about it. Jessica was, and always would be, better than Margaret. Margaret simply did not have it in her to embrace this right away...if ever.
Her father turned to Joseph and the boys. “You all must be tired after the long trip. Let’s go find your luggage and get you settled into a motel. I can’t have you sleeping under the same roof as my daughter unless you’re married to her.”
Jessica shook her head. “You can’t confine children to a motel. I know! They can stay with Tom’s parents. They have enough room for all of you, and since they live on a farm, there’s plenty of room to play.”
“A farm?” one of the older boys asked. “Uncle Paul had a farm. Are there horses out there?”
“There sure are,” Jessica replied.
“I don’t know,” Joseph said. “There’s a lot of us.”
Jessica laughed and waved her hand. “The Larsons are used to a lot of people. Why, there are five kids in that family, except most of them are grown up and have their own places. And they are planting beans and corn. If you want to do something in return for food and lodging, I’m sure they could use the extra help.”
Joseph relaxed. “If we can earn our keep, then it’d work. Doug and Bob used to help their uncle in the fields.”
She clapped her hands and laughed. “Then it’s settled.”
One of the boys jumped up and down. “We get to stay on the farm! Can we ride horses too?”
Jessica nodded. “After all the work is done, Bob.”
It was official. Jessica was better than her, Margaret thought. She even knew which kid was which. No wonder all the men wanted to be with Jessica instead of her. Jessica was more likeable, more attractive, more... Well, just more everything!
But she couldn’t compare herself to Jessica. No matter how tempting it was, especially at times like this.
“We got to meet Tom’s parents at the wedding,” Margaret’s mother told Joseph. “They adore children. They have a couple of grandchildren. I believe their oldest son has twin boys.”
“Richard has two boys and one girl. The twins are three and the girl is only five months old,” Jessica clarified. “Tom’s sister, Sally, just found out she’s expecting her first child.”
“No older kids?” one of Joseph’s boys asked Jessica.
She shook her head. “I’m afraid not. But you’re seven and Bob is six, so you already have someone close to your age to play with.”
As much as Margaret liked her friend, she was starting to wish she hadn’t brought her along. The boys were already falling in love with her. She sighed in despair. It was a sign. Paul’s death, Joseph coming out with a bunch of kids, and Jessica getting along wonderfully with them... It was all a sign. And it pointed to one conclusion: Margaret wasn’t meant to get married. Most women married and went on to lead very happy lives. But not every woman got married. And apparently, Margaret was doomed to be one of them.
As she watched the two older boys animatedly talk to Jessica who led them all to the luggage area, she knew there was nothing she had to offer children. Joseph would just have to find another woman in the area, go back home or post his own ad for a wife. Because nothing was convincing her that she was the right one for him and his children.
Margaret rolled her eyes. Why fight fate? She was just meant to be single forever, and she was sure that before long, Joseph would realize it too.
Chapter Three
Margaret picked up the letters Paul had written her and read them in the privacy of her bedroom. Why did he have to fall off his horse? Why did he even have to ride a horse? Because that’s what farmers do. Riding horses is part of their job. With a heavy sigh, she settled back on her bed and stared at the ceiling.
It didn’t seem fair. In fact, the more bad things happened to her, the more convinced she was that she was cursed. Paul seemed like a nice man. He’d made her laugh with some of his comments, so he obviously had a great sense of humor. Her big worry had been that he’d see her with Jessica and find her lacking. Not once did it occur to her that he’d suffer a fatal accident. She knew she should feel sorry for him. He was dead after all. But the selfish part of her couldn’t help but wonder why he couldn’t have been more careful on the dumb animal.
Why me? Of all the men out there, why did the one who actually wanted to come out and marry her have to die? Well, she supposed that wasn’t entirely true. His brother had come out asking to marry her. Because he has four boys who need a mother. It had nothing to do with her.
She picked up Paul’s second letter and read the part where he told her that she sounded like someone he could enjoy being married to. He liked how sensible she was. He hadn’t seen her but already liked her because she was straight forward. What other man had taken the time to find out anything about her? None.
It was enough to make her want to cry, even though she wasn’t one to give into tears. Tears were far too impractical because they didn’t solve anything.
Giving another heavy sigh, she rolled over and stared out her window. She didn’t feel like meeting Joseph tomorrow but knew she would. He came all the way out here. It wouldn’t be right to not open the door when he came. But did she really have to marry him just because he arrived? She had no idea he was coming. He didn’t even write to let her know for goodness’ sakes! She didn’t owe him anything. Just because Jessica would’ve married him, it didn’t mean she had to.
Surely in good time, he’d find a woman like Jessica and get her to take on the responsibility of four boys. Margaret was certain that most women would readily agree to it. He wouldn’t have to wait long before he found one. Maybe she’d offer to help him find one. Yes, that would work. Then she wouldn’t have to feel guilty when she told him there was no way she could handle four children. It was one thing to have one child at a time and slowly adjust to a full house, but being thrown into it all at once was way too much of a shock.
She took a deep breath and slowly exhaled. Such was life. Not everyone was meant to be happy.
“Margaret?”
She turned her head so she could see her mother standing in the doorway. “What?”
“Today didn’t go as you thought it would.”
That was stating the obvious. Margaret bit back the sarcastic comment. She shouldn’t let her foul mood affect her behavior.
Her mother came into the room and sat on the edge of the bed. “Sometimes life doesn’t turn out the way we think it will, but it could mean that better things are at the door.”
Rolling her eyes, Margaret stared back at the ceiling. Like she needed a pep talk right now! What she needed was to go back in time and warn Paul not to ride his stupid horse.
“I know this is hard for you,” her mother continued. She reached out and lightly rubbed Margaret’s arm. “I certainly didn’t expect a widower with four children to come off that train either. It caught us all by surprise.”
There her mother went again—referring to the surprise. Margaret figured by now, her mother had done that a good ten times. Mostly on the way home and now in her bedroom. Well, she might as well add to it. “Yes, it was a surprise.” One huge, gigantic, colossal surprise! She dared a look in her mother’s direction. “Do you think I’m mean for not wanting to marry him?”
“I think you should get to know him before making that decision.”
“What�
��s there to know? He wants a mother for his kids. Did you see how many there are?”
She chuckled. “Of course, I did. I’m not blind.”
“I’m not heartless, Ma. I feel sorry for him. I can’t imagine trying to take care of four children all by myself. He does need a mother for them.”
She smiled. “He’s been married before so he knows there’s more to a marriage than taking care of children.”
“Oh, I know. There’s having a woman who’ll cook and clean and do his laundry too.”
“Paul would’ve asked you to do the same thing.”
Margaret groaned and threw the pillow over her face. “I don’t want logic right now. I just want to wallow in misery.”
“I know.” She lifted the pillow from her daughter’s face. “And I’ll let you enjoy every second of it for the rest of today. But—” she gave her a pointed look—“I expect you to wake up tomorrow with the notion that you will at least get to know Joseph when you see him. Marriage isn’t all about chores and children. It’s about the sharing of your life with someone else.”
“I knew you wanted grandchildren, but I didn’t realize you wanted a whole lot of them at one time.”
Laughing, she gently placed the pillow back over Margaret’s face. “It’s more than children or grandchildren. It’s about seeing my daughter happy. I think Joseph is a nice man.”
“He’s old.”
“Thirty isn’t old.”
“He’s ten years older than me.” She gasped and sat up. The pillow fell to her lap. “His oldest child is seven. I was thirteen when that kid was born.”
“That means you’re still older and able to provide a stern look of authority over the youngster.”
Grumbling, Margaret laid back in the bed and returned the pillow to her face. She was beginning to wish she hadn’t posted an ad at all. This was a mess. Her mother wouldn’t be happy if she decided not to marry Joseph. But so what? It was Margaret’s life, not her mother’s.
“Give it a good night’s sleep,” her mother advised.
Margaret felt the bed shift, notifying her that her mother stood up.
“Things always look better after a good night’s sleep.”
When her mother left the room, Margaret pulled the pillow off of her face and let out a sigh of despair.
***
The next afternoon, Margaret glanced at the clock above the fireplace and cringed. Joseph was due any minute. She turned her gaze to the window and peered out of it. There was no sign of him yet. She exhaled, relieved.
Her mother entered the parlor. “It’ll be a nice day to go for a walk.”
Margaret turned from the window and asked, “Will you come along?”
Her mother chuckled. “Of course not. You need to get to know him, and that isn’t going to happen unless you two can talk alone.”
Margaret fought the urge to groan and sat down in a chair. She put her face in her hands. She had no idea what she could say to him that might be of any interest. After all, she had no experience with children. What in the world could she possibly have to offer him? Well, except for being a mother to his brood of offspring. She shuddered. Four boys. Not even a girl among them! She knew absolutely nothing about boys—or men for that matter.
“He’s here,” her mother called out.
She didn’t look up right away. Instead, she listened as her mother opened the front door and greeted him. This, she was sure, was going to be a disaster. The only saving grace was that he didn’t plan to bring his children with him. She looked up then, making sure no kids came running into the house. It was just him. Good. At least that would make things less awkward.
She cleared her throat and stood up. “Ma thought it’d be a good idea if we went for a walk.” She glanced at her mother and shot her a pleading look to join them.
“I need to get down to the mercantile,” her mother said. “Take your time.”
Margaret inwardly groaned. Too bad her sister was in school because if she wasn’t, Margaret would ask her to come along. It’d be much better if one other person was there to help break the tension.
“It is a nice day for a walk,” Joseph said, offering a tentative smile.
Perhaps this wasn’t any easier for him than it was for her. As strange as it was, that actually made her feel better. “Alright.” She followed him out to the porch.
“Have a good time!” her mother said.
Margaret knew her mother meant well but was too nervous to respond. Instead, she shut the door and crossed her arms because she couldn’t figure out what else to do with them.
“Where do you usually go for a walk around here?” he asked.
“Umm...” She debated whether to go to the park or through town. “I think the park will be good since the weather is nice.”
He nodded and followed her down the porch steps.
She glanced back once and saw her mother watching them from the parlor window. “I need to go to the mercantile” my left foot, Margaret thought. Her mother had done her weekly shopping two days ago. Reluctant, she turned her attention to Joseph. She couldn’t bring herself to look at him as they strolled down the sidewalk that led to the park. Clearing her throat, she got ready to speak. She had to tell him the truth, and the sooner she did it, the better.
With a heavy sigh, she said, “I’m not the kind of person who believes in wasting her time. I agreed to meet with you today because my parents insisted on it. But to tell you the truth, I don’t think I have what it takes to raise four boys. I mean, if I was their mother, it would be different. I’d be able to get used to them one at a time. This whole thing with all of them at once... Well...” She shrugged. “It’s too much.”
There. She said it. Stopping, she waited to see if he would want to continue the walk—and listen to her go into more detail on her decision—or if he’d want to stop wasting his time with her and find a woman who would be happy to take on him and his children.
“It’s been nine years since I courted a woman, so I’m a bit rusty at this. But I got a chance to read your letters, and I thought you sounded like a woman I could get along well with.” He shifted from one foot to the other. “It’s true I could use a mother for my children, and I do want her to be good to them. I also want a woman who’ll make a good companion.”
She lifted her head and took a good look at him. So it did matter to him who he married. Then he wasn’t just hoping to settle for her. That made her feel better about everything. “Well, I suppose we could talk.”
His body relaxed. “I like your straightforwardness,” he admitted with a smile.
As they resumed their stroll down the sidewalk, she replied, “I don’t see the point in not saying what I mean. Too many people can take advantage of someone who’s afraid to say no.”
He chuckled. “That’s especially true of children. And don’t think saying ‘no’ once is enough.”
“I don’t know the first thing about children. My sister might be eight years younger than me, but I didn’t do much with her.”
“I wouldn’t expect you to do everything yourself. I didn’t realize how much work it is to take care of them until my wife passed away.”
As they crossed the street, she asked, “How did she die?”
“She got sick and never recovered.”
There was a hint of sorrow in his voice, so she ventured, “You must have loved her.”
“I did. We grew up together. I think we always knew we’d get married.” He looked at her. “I don’t mean to ramble on about her. I am interested in learning about you and having you learn about me.”
Maybe her mother was right. Maybe he did know there was more to a marriage than taking care of the children. “What do you want to know about me?”
He put his hands in his pockets and studied the ground for a moment. “I read the letters you sent Paul. When he told me he was coming out here, he showed them to me,” he quickly explained, as if he expected her to be upset.
“I assum
ed you read them if you knew I was looking for a husband.” As soon as she said those words, she wished she could take them back. She sounded desperate. What woman worth marrying had to post an ad for a husband? None of her friends had to stoop to such measures. They had men to choose from. How she wished the same had been the case for her. Refusing to look at him in case he picked up on the frustration and shame in her eyes, she added, “I just figured you had to find out about me that way. You don’t seem like the kind of man who searches through the paper looking for a wife.”
“It never occurred to me.”
Of course not. He was gorgeous.
“You see, I assumed that all the ads were men looking for women,” he continued. “So Paul happened to find your ad and told me about it. I thought he had a good idea, so I went and looked through the other ads but didn’t find any others.”
Her cheeks grew even warmer, something she didn’t think possible since she was embarrassed enough as it was. No other woman in the country had the problem she did. Terrific. Wonderful. Perfect. She crossed her arms and tried not to groan.
“When your first letter came, he brought it out for me to read, and I thought he’d do well to marry you,” he said.
She examined him to determine whether he was just telling her this so she’d agree to take on the task of raising his army of children, but he seemed sincere.
He shrugged and glanced at her. “In fact, there was a part of me that envied him. He saw your ad first. It wouldn’t have been right to intervene, so I stayed out of it.”
“Really?” she asked in a hopeful tone. She wanted to slap herself for saying that. Could she sound even more eager for a man to be interested in her if she tried?
He grinned. “Is that so hard to believe?”
She decided not to answer that in case she made an even bigger fool of herself.
“I didn’t want Paul to die. It’s a shame a man has to go before he has a chance to live and see what life has to offer. I thought you’d make him happy.”
Her unease was starting to ebb. She realized that they had already traveled half the length of the park. Spotting a bench, she asked, “Would you like to sit for awhile? It’s such a nice day that it’d be a shame to hurry back inside.”
A Husband for Margaret Page 2
