At first, trying to build a better version of myself was hard as there were so many deeply buried voices from my past saying, ‘What a waste of time. This isn’t working . . .’ added to which I didn’t particularly like who I was. ‘I am ready to accept change, as difficult as it may seem, I know I am being prepared for bigger and better things.’
I found an official contract template and made it out to myself, stating a date and an intention – a contract with myself – and read it out loud to my reflection in the mirror every morning. At first, I felt like a dick as my imaginary audience laughed and joked at me, but the more I repeated it the more that it began to feel more natural and familiar; besides, if you can’t look yourself in the eye and tell yourself what you want, how can you ever expect to achieve it? After a few days I started to gain confidence in my belief (I even believed it), and I told myself exactly what I was going to achieve. All the while I kept reassuring myself, ‘This visualisation stuff works, it works . . . you nearly died because of it in Iraq when you summoned that attack so you could extend your contract with ABC News . . . you brought it to you by visualising it. Remember that.’
But after the first few weeks nothing had happened, apart from my feeling fitter and healthier, and it was getting to a point where I needed something from the Universe, proof of all my efforts. I started saying, ‘Give me something, however small, to show that I’m not going mad. Show me a sign that I’m on the right track . . .’ Eventually I did get a sign and it was by no means ‘small’. The problem was I was coming from a place of lack: ‘I need this, I need (want) that.’ When I look back now, the Universe had something a lot bigger to show me, because the amount of effort I put into clearly envisaging my future company Break-Point was literally every minute of every day: pure focus, and the theory behind Break-Point was exactly the process I was engaged in. So, when I look at it that way, something life-changing was building, entirely relative to the amount I was focusing on it, and naturally that took more time to reveal itself.
Part of that focus was about keeping my mindset pure and being brutal with negative influences. As best I could, I removed every possible source of influence that might dampen my equilibrium and drive. I surrounded myself with positive mantras. It was a very disciplined and regimented atmosphere. As well as reading positive thinking books, the most influential and thought provoking of which was Eckhart Tolle’s A New Earth, I also tried acupuncture to help stop drinking. The more I focused on its lack of purpose and the things I wanted to achieve; the less powerful alcohol became. A lot of people would say that drinking is an integral part of their job because they go out networking, meet other people, and that alcohol is a good enabler for conversation. My response to this is it depends on the individual; if you have a dependency on drinking and it is controlling you, then it’s not a positive at all. On top of that people are more addicted to alcohol then they are the networking so all in all what they are doing is simply notworking. For me, personally, there was no purpose or value in drinking. I knew the departure of it was the answer to unlocking my potential.
Asking ourselves on a constant basis, ‘What’s the purpose of this, how is it benefiting me?’ is a very powerful self-assessment tool, and a brutal exposer of that which is bad for us. As soon as we start addressing ourselves without bullshit, targeting the efficacy of external things in our lives, huge changes start happening. You’ll start questioning your jobs, your personal relationships, your need to buy expensive cars or be seen in certain restaurants. The rewards of investing in yourself and your inner life come thick and fast.
I have to mention here that the purpose for this is to change the blueprint. Forty-three years of programming simply can’t be changed by acknowledging you don’t like something about your life. We have to build new neurons and make them super-highways of new positive habits.
MAKING A CONTRACT WITH YOURSELF
A self-contract that you design and read to yourself every morning is a great way to keep focused on your goal. You should stick to one overarching goal and set a deadline for the contract. Keep the wording of the agreement simple and clear, stating what you want to achieve, how you’ll achieve it and how it will positively impact your life. Don’t place your focus on the penalties of not following through with it, but rather the positive outcomes. Nobody likes to break a promise, and by signing it and saying it to your reflection repeatedly in the mirror each morning, you’re making an agreement with yourself which you won’t want to break. If you’re unsure of whether you’ll stick to your self-contract, enlist a trusted friend, mentor or respected colleague to co-sign a hard copy as a witness. But pick this person carefully, for close friends and families often give us well-meant advice that attempts to dissuade us from attempting what seem to them unrealistic or overly challenging goals.
EXERCISE: MAKE YOUR OWN CONTRACT
Here’s an example to guide you:
I (your name) ___________________________________________________________ on this day, (insert date) _____________________________________________ hereby state my intention of achieving (insert goal),_______________________________________________________________by (insert date) _____________________________________________ and give my personal promise to follow the programme I have designed for myself (insert details on the process/steps to achieving your goal) _______________________________________________________________________________ . For the duration of the programme I will remain focused and disciplined, implementing and executing all my designs to the best of my ability.
The area of my life that I will impact during my personal bootcamp will be (insert here – it could be health, finances, whatever it is you want to change) __________________________________________________.
Signed
Witness
MORNING ROUTINE
The way you start the day is integral to what you achieve in it and how it ends. My morning routine means that I take myself to the day and dominate over it. If your life is governed by the resentment of waking, followed by repetitive snooze button interrogation, you’re heading to the dark side of every day.
It should look something a little like this:
• Wake
• Positive affirmation
• Make your bed
• Do not take your phone off flight mode
• Avoid looking at your phone. Avoid all emails. Be selfish. This is your time.
• Read your personal contract out loud to yourself while looking in a mirror. Do it somewhere quiet without distractions. If you want to put your stamp on the day, the earlier in the morning, the better.
• Meditation – while you are reading the contract start to visualise in your mind’s eye what the goal you have chosen not only looks like but also feels like. Paint the picture, use all your senses. Allow yourself to live the moment as if it’s already happened.
• Lemon and hot water – no coffee or tea
• Exercise
• Eat
• Battle Ready for the day
This is exactly how I started, and it changed my life. It was difficult to do but the only way you can change your habits is to engage in a process that is void of emotions, feelings and judgement. The only question is: How much do you want to change?
Remember: ‘Persistence kills resistance’.
Over time my routine hasn’t differed too much and now looks like this:
0500 – Wake & Rise like a Polaris missile!
0515 – Power cocktail:
Organic and dried powder:
1 tbsp grated lemon peel
½ tsp cinnamon
1 tsp turmeric
½ tsp ginger
½ tsp cayenne pepper
1 tsp Celtic salt
1 tbsp apple cider vinegar
1 tbsp MCT oil
Method – Place ingredients in a cup of hot water and mix with milk frother, add dash of cold water to cool and drink with straw so you don’t look like a hardened smoker from the turmeric.
r /> Reason – When you sleep your body goes into a period of forced starvation (fasting), it’s ready and waiting to absorb whatever is given to it. Although I’m not averse to a coffee, caffeine is a toxin and the energy you feel from this is your body reacting to the poison. The ingredients above are super foods and all play an amazing part in your health.
0530 – Guided meditation. This is my focused attention at my intention, for the day, the week and for my specific goal.
0600 – Run or gym.
0700 – Answer or send emails to keep opportunities in momentum. This is when I turn on my phone and check social media. Rest of UK starts to get up.
0800 – Ready to dominate.
POSITIVE AFFIRMATIONS
In Australia, 2014, I knew change was upon me. I’d started getting more in tune with my thoughts and the beginnings of my newly found spiritual education, empowered by a daily positive affirmation: ‘I am willing to accept change, as difficult as it may seem. I know I am destined for bigger and better things.’
At the time I had said this repeatedly with no idea or knowledge of where I wanted to be or what I was going to do. My contract with the oil company was coming to an end and change was looming, which scared me as I’d got so used to the comfort of a steady wage and a nice apartment overlooking the Brisbane River. I didn’t have a plan and then one morning, I woke at 3 a.m. and, summoned to attention with a thought that contradicted my very being, I was suddenly wide awake and being directed to the thought of moving back to the UK, almost like a secret code had opened a door to a forbidden area. I decided to allow the thought to gather some momentum. It was something that I had fought against for so long, but perhaps this was my calling to return?
And as I said earlier, within two weeks I had sold everything and was on a plane ‘destined for bigger and better things’, but all I had to go on was a vison, an insight; I was still very much in the midst of short-term discomfort.
What are ‘positive affirmations’ or ‘self-affirmations’? In simple terms, they are positive sentences – always set in the present tense – that you repeat to yourself again and again with the sole intention of making the mantra real. Remember, your brain doesn’t know the difference between reality and what you tell it, so by saying you’re feeling positive even if this is not the case will send this message to your brain which then transmits the feeling to the rest of your body, and before you know it you do feel better.
When you first start using affirmations such as: ‘I am healthy, financially stable and in control of my life’, it might not be true. But over time the consistent repetition of this daily, positive affirmation will reshape your belief about yourself, giving you a more positive perception of who you are, while the finances, health and self-control take shape in tandem. After a couple of weeks, you’ll be your own best believer.
Given that your brain is a creature of habit and strengthens connections every time you repeat an action or a thought until it becomes second nature, by seeding the same message to it again and again, it quickly adopts this as true and makes it happen. A quote I love is from a guy called Bob Proctor: ‘If you can hold it in your head, you can hold it in your hands.’ It’s so true. Affirmations are especially useful in times of fear, weakness, self-doubt and when making big chances to your life. Self-esteem and confidence can be increased through affirmations, as can the appetite for exercise, losing weight, in fact pretty much anything you put your mind to. The more tension there is between the current reality and the goal the better, for the brain always seeks to fix discomfort. In other words, if you have an affirmation that seems a long way from your current experience to the extent that it feels awkward repeating it – maybe it’s something like: ‘I am wealthy and have a good relationship with money’ – your brain will help you make changes to your lifestyle to make it come true. Remember Bruce Lee telling himself he was not only going to walk again but be the first Pan-Asian action superstar? We are what we tell ourselves and some of us are naturally better at it than others, but we all have the capacity for imagination within us.
Everybody said the four-minute mile couldn’t be broken until Roger Bannister finally smashed it. On the morning of his run on 24 July 1954, he wasn’t focusing on the fact he had never achieved this in the past, nor that he never would in the future; instead he was in flow with himself in the present. And as you probably know, it wasn’t just his own personal best he broke that day as well as setting a new world record, he also broke down that negative spectre holding all distance runners back; namely that it was impossible to run a sub-four-minute mile. Interesting that within a few months of his achievement several athletes would go on to do the same. Why? Because they gave themselves permission to imagine doing the same as Bannister, knowing that it was now achievable, even though it had been achievable all along. They simply unlocked potential that was withheld due to the limitation they had personally framed around it.
Think about it a moment. What is it that you are visualizing – creating a global brand, losing five stone, running your first 5K race on a prosthetic limb, walking across the Gobi Desert to raise funds for cancer research? The chances are these admirable feats have been done before and you are just as capable as those individuals who have already gone where you wish to go, so take heart from their achievement, give yourself permission to succeed knowing that it is entirely possible and within your grasp.
The power of affirmations lies in their ability to transform your external world by first changing your internal one. As new, more positive beliefs form in your mind, it becomes progressively easier to create what you want in life, no matter what it is. Daily affirmations help you vibrate in alignment with abundance rather than lack, enabling you to manifest your goals more quickly. They also make you more aware of your thought processes, allowing you to recognise and challenge negative thoughts as they arise. Positive affirmations enhance personal happiness as well as providing a much-needed shot of self-belief.
MORNING AFFIRMATION
When we go into sleep mode our lizard brain, or inner chimp as it’s often referred to, sits on guard, hardwired to protect us. As we know he’s been doing it for hundreds of thousands of years. When you wake up in the morning the chimp is finishing up his nightly vigil and he’s tired and cranky, and if you’re not careful he can ruin the start of your day with negative expectations; see how quickly, and we’re talking seconds here, your thoughts turn to worry in the morning when you stir awake.
So, morning affirmations are about starting with a positive outlook rather than a passive one. I go to meet the day, the day does not come to me. And to do this, to put my mark on it and access a positive mood that will radiate through the day, I have a very structured process to keep me in check. Early rise around 5am, followed by meditation and morning affirmations. Your morning needs to begin with a positive affirmation before the ego has a chance to start looking for negatives. As soon as you wake up in the morning a mantra as simple as, ‘Today’s going to be an amazing day full of opportunities,’ can get you off to a good start. Remember, your brain will do what it’s told to, so even if it’s pissing down outside and you feel flat as a pancake, tell your brain otherwise. Here’s some examples you can use if you’re struggling to think of a mantra.
• Today I’m looking forward to having a great productive day.
• Difficult as it seems, every day I am one step closer to my goals.
• I feel grateful for the opportunities that will come my way today.
• Today I am going to be kind to myself and do as much as I can.
• I am not scared of failure, I embrace change and welcome abundance.
• I accept blessings and abundance into my life.
• I am healthy, happy and determined.
EXERCISE: POSITIVE AFFIRMATIONS AND MORNING AFFIRMATIONS
Affirmations are proven methods of self-improvement because of their ability to rewire our brains. Much like exercise, they raise the level of feel-good hormones
and push our brains to form new clusters of ‘positive thought’ neurons. In the sequence of thought-speech-action, affirmations play an integral role by breaking patterns of negative thoughts, negative speech, and, in turn, negative actions.
Examples of Positive Affirmations:
• I am superior to negative thoughts and low actions.
• I possess the qualities needed to be extremely successful.
• My ability to conquer my challenges is limitless; my potential to succeed is infinite.
How to Create Positive Affirmations
1. Start with the words ‘I am. . .’
2. Use the present tense.
3. State it in the positive.
4. Keep it brief.
5. Make it specific.
6. Include an action word ending with –ing.
7. Include at least one dynamic emotion or feeling word.
8. Make affirmations for yourself, not others.
Spend time coming up with an affirmation that supports your goal. Practise saying your positive affirmation as soon as you wake and the negativity starts to flow or at any time you are feeling negative about your positive actions.
Battle Ready Page 13