“Where to now?” Quinn asked.
“Russia,” I said, and then we were gone.
Chapter Fourteen
As soon as we arrived in the woods in southern Siberia, I dropped their hands and stepped away, my head spinning.
Too many jumps, too quickly. I did not want them to see me tired. Weak.
And now that the cold calm that came with violence had passed, I was feeling all of the emotions I’d been holding in check upon discovering my sister. In having my theories confirmed, that my kind were not only alive and well in some cases, but also involved in what we were doing.
I did not want them to see that, either.
I stepped away, and breathed, and tried to retain some semblance of calm. Why did I even care? My sisters, those that still lived, as well as those who were dead, were traitors to my kind.
If nothing else, I know what I am. I know who I serve. There is no question about that. Yet Kleio’s comment about me being defective struck me, hard.
Why was I the only one who still believed?
I’d heard the whispers from them, of course, in the thousands of years at their sides. They’d gone from gentle taunts of “the good soldier,” to derisive commentary.
Zealot.
Servant.
Machine.
They were not wrong. I was all of those things at heart.
My belief in the necessity of my role, in the rightness of what I do, does perhaps make me a zealot. And I am the first to admit that I am more like a machine than anything else.
“You all right?” Quinn’s voice said behind me. I had walked further into the woods and hadn’t even noticed that he’d followed me.
“I am fine,” I answered. “You should be with the others.”
“Is that an order?”
I did not answer. We stood in silence for a bit, and I felt my strength coming back.
“So that was the scariest fuckin’ thing I’ve ever seen,” he said finally, and I found myself smiling a little.
“Then it was a good demonstration of what happens to those who get on my bad side,” I said, looking back at him.
“You could definitely say that. Yeah,” he said, meeting my eyes. “I have no intention of getting on your bad side, Eunomia.”
“Good to know.”
“She was your sister?”
“In a manner of speaking. Though she has no right to call herself that.”
“Why not?”
“Because she is so far beneath me, she has lost the right to do so.”
He was watching me. “You’re a god?”
“I am a servant of gods. I am immortal. But I am not one of them. I am one of the oldest things in this realm.”
“That seems overwhelming,” he said, looking up at the sky peeking between the tangled branches above us.
“Not really.”
He was watching me. “I’ve never seen anyone give a beating like that before and not show an ounce of anger.”
“That is what makes me so efficient. Anger clouds the senses, distracts your focus. So does fear.”
“And you don’t have that, either,” he said.
I shook my head. “My only fear is of failing. And I have no intention of doing that.”
He tore his gaze away from mine. “If she demands that you turn us over…”
“It will not come to that. I will not fail in that, either. Trust me.”
“I do trust you.”
“Good. You should be with the others. And this time it is an order, Quinn.”
He nodded, and I watched him walk away.
I turned back toward the woods and pulled my sister’s dagger out of my pocket, where I’d quickly stuffed it after picking it up. I inspected the blade, noting that it was immaculately clean, as it should be. I unzipped my coat and reached inside, pulling the steel dagger out of its sheath and putting the black stone dagger in its place. The steel dagger, I sheathed inside my boot.
After a while, I returned to my team. “I need to get back to Germany, but I will return as soon as I can. You can rest here.” It was not the most hospitable of places, but I knew souls did not feel cold, or warmth. It was deserted enough that, should anyone else arrive, my new Guardians would be able to detect them quickly and protect themselves.
Claire and Erin nodded gratefully, and they each settled onto a different area of the forest floor. Cathleen went to where Erin was resting, and settled in next to her. Quinn still sat where he was, back against a large log.
“Something is troubling you,” I said quietly, settling myself next to him.
“Can’t quite get the way you looked earlier out of my head.”
“What do you mean?”
“Seeing someone so emotionless when they’re causing the kind of damage. It’s not natural.”
“It would have been better if I’d been hysterical?”
“No. I just—“
“Or maybe if I’d been crying? If I’d needed someone to soothe me? Someone to hold me together before I fell apart?”
“That would be more normal, yes.”
“It will take a lot more than that to break me,” I said, running my fingers through the thin layer of snow on the ground between his thigh and mine. “And I am not a human. Do not expect me to act like one.”
“That other one, though. She was angry. And scared. What makes you so different?”
Good question, I thought to myself. “She is broken. Compromised. I am not.”
He did not answer, and I sensed that he was trying to figure it all out somehow.
“She called you defective,” he reminded me.
“Yet she was the one riding the soul of a mass murderer as if he was a prized pony. If I am the defective one, I choose to wear the label proudly.”
“Zing.”
I hid the smile that came to my lips.
“When I said earlier that you’re the type of woman who would have driven me nuts?” he said.
“Yes?”
“I meant that in a good way. Just so you know.”
“Hmm, compliments. Trying to get on my good sides? Are you scared of me now?” I asked with the hint of a smile on my lips.
“Completely terrified,” he said. “But I’ve always had a thing for dangerous girls.”
“Is that a hint, Quinn?”
“A not very subtle one, boss.”
“Are you wanting me to ride you like a prized pony?” I asked.
“Without a doubt.”
I rolled my eyes. “You must have been a real charmer when you were alive,” I said drily.
“Not so much, no.”
“That was sarcasm.”
“Oh,” he said, and I laughed.
We sat in silence for a few moments. “You say you’re one of the oldest things in existence,” Quinn said, and I nodded, still absentmindedly messing with the snow between us. “Yet this, us being here and your Queen not knowing… you’ve never seen this?”
I shook my head. “It is wrong. And the fact that I discovered a sister who I’ve since confirmed did, in fact, die, is wrong. These souls getting helped out of the Nether—“
“Wrong,” he said, and I nodded again.
“I wish I knew anything that would help you figure it out. I keep trying to think about when I died and what happened after. The only thing I know for sure is that nobody came for me. Nobody like you, no crows, nothing.”
I didn’t answer. “We know you all died violently. That you were drawn to the idea of forcing those trying to avoid their judgment to stay put until they could be retrieved. There is something there. And if my Queen knew of you, I’d feel better about all of this. But something like this just doesn’t belong. I do not understand it.”
“That must not be something you say often,” he said, watching my hand as I drew in the snow.
“I say it much more often than I’d like to,” I muttered. “Humans are nonsensical.”
“He’s a human, then? This person who’s all under you
r skin?”
I glanced up, met his gaze. Was I really that obvious? “We are not talking about this.”
“Fine,” he said, shrugging. “Just seems to me maybe a male perspective might help.”
I gave him a disbelieving look. “Males are the most clueless of all humans.”
“Hey now,” he said, laughing.
“That is not saying much. The females are not that much better.”
“Yet one of them has confused you so badly you don’t know what to do with yourself. What does that say about you, boss?”
“It says I need to focus on the things I am supposed to be thinking about. Some things are better left alone.”
“That wasn’t exactly the point I was trying to make.”
“The point you were trying to make was idiotic,” I said, standing up and dusting my pants off.
“You definitely have a way with people,” he said, standing as well.
I did not respond. I cleared my throat. “I will be back when I can,” I said. “We have a handful of targets here in Russia. Once we’ve apprehended them, we will move on to Japan. Hopefully we will get these souls tracked down quickly. Time is rather of the essence.”
“Maybe we’ll find more like us, who’re looking for ye,” Claire said from where she was resting.
“Gods, I hope not,” I muttered, and focused, and when I next opened my eyes, I was in the room I shared with Hephaestus at the inn in Germany, and he was sound asleep.
We moved through five cities in Russia, and it quickly became clear that my little team of souls were becoming a disciplined, well-organized force. Once I’d found the energy signature of each soul, they’d spread out, almost like hounds tracking their prey. They were relentless, tireless, and they did not let up until the souls were found. It was all much faster than I’d ever been able to track a soul on my own. So much more efficient.
And with each soul we found, they seemed to grow even more dedicated to me, to their role at my side. And I found myself feeling the same about them. To his credit, Hephaestus was very good at staying out of my way and asking no questions. He knew me well enough, and had known me long enough, not to worry when I went out to hunt.
Aside from the bond I was starting to feel with my New Guardians, as I’d begun thinking of them, there was more.
I also felt something changing in their energy signatures. They were stronger. A glance at Quinn showed that he looked more solid, more real.
They were on their way to developing fully corporeal forms. Without the grisly methods that usually brought the change about.
I studied Quinn as we stopped to rest after apprehending our final Russian soul.
“See anything you like, boss?” he asked with a smirk.
“Don’t be an idiot,” I said. “You’re becoming corporeal.”
“Huh?”
“You’re becoming solid. Soon you’ll be easily visible to other immortals. And likely to humans as well, if you aren’t already.”
“I don’t think so,” he said, shaking his head.
“What makes you say that?”
“We’re becoming more real to you, maybe to the rest of your kind, I suppose. More full. I know I’m stronger the longer we fight by your side. Them, too,” he said, nodding toward the women. “We’re only real and solid in your eyes. Watch,” he said, walking away from me, where a teenage boy was walking past, earbuds in his ears. I was about to shout to stop him, but I reminded myself at the last moment that the humans could actually see me and it would look ridiculous. He drew back and gave the teenage boy a hard shove… And the teenage boy did not move. Quinn went straight through him, despite how solid he looked.
I crossed my arms, and he shrugged. “Just you, boss.”
“Did you have to be quite so dramatic about it?”
Quinn grinned. “Was fun watching you trying to decide whether to freak out or not.”
I rolled my eyes and turned away.
I checked my phone and there was a text messages from Mollis. I opened it immediately. I’d been almost ceaselessly haranguing the Furies and Mollis for any information they had managed to get from my sister, so far, to no avail. Unfortunately, there still was no news, and her message did nothing to alleviate my stress level.
“I want Brennan to go with you to Japan.”
“Shit,” I muttered.
I thought for a moment and then typed. “Do not need his help.”
A moment later, a response. “I know. Heph told me. You’re getting it anyway.”
Before I could respond, another text. “Heph is swapping with Brennan right now. No more arguing.”
“Why? Send someone else.”
“Him. He is driving me fucking nuts because you went without him. If you don’t take him, I’m gonna kill him.”
I threw my hands up in irritation. “Fine,” I texted back.
A moment later, “Love ya, E. Be safe.”
I smiled to myself. “Back at you demon girl.”
By the time I made it back to where Hephaestus and I had been staying, Brennan was the one waiting in our room for me, his bag tossed onto the bed Hephaestus had claimed as his own. He was sitting on the edge of his bed, arms crossed.
All right. He was not happy with me.
“We will move on to Japan soon. I need to get cleaned up first,” I said in greeting.
“You left without saying anything to me,” he said.
I stopped, resting my hand on the doorframe between our room and the bathroom. “I did.”
“And you said I’m too young for you.”
I nodded. “I did. But only after you shared your concern that I am too independent for you. You have reservations about whatever this is. So do I.”
“Which is exactly why I’m not pushing you,” he said.
“Same. I am not even sure what this is, and I am even less sure that it should develop any further.”
“Great. Perfect,” he muttered.
“Was that not what you were going to say to me?” I asked him, crossing my arms over my chest.
“I don’t know,” he said, running his hand through his hair. “I missed you though, Tink,” he said and when he looked at me, there was that tiny lift of the corner of his mouth that I liked so much.
“You were worried I was unable to handle myself without you shadowing my every move,” I said.
“I was worried. I know damn well you can handle yourself just fine without me. It doesn’t mean I have to like you being in danger. There’s a difference between not believing in you and wanting to be able to help you. I know you’re a badass. I know you’ve got this. I still want to be here for you. Okay?”
I sighed, shook my head. “You confuse me.”
“I know.”
“I do not like it.”
“I know that, too. I think that’s part of what’s making this so weird.”
“Oh? Enlighten me then, Cub.”
He grinned, and stood up, and walked toward me, and my stomach twisted and my body warmed a little more with each step he took toward me. “You are used to being in complete control. To knowing exactly how every aspect of a situation will play out. You have seen everything, you are surprised by almost nothing. But you don’t feel in control now, and you hate that.”
“I am still surprised by things,” I argued, and he stopped in front of me, looking down into my eyes.
“Way to not comment on the rest of what I said,” he said.
“The rest of what you said was ridiculous,” I said. “Be ready to leave in twenty minutes.” With that, I closed the bathroom door behind me with a deep breath of relief.
Once this was over, I was really going to have to figure out how to stop being so affected by him.
Chapter Fifteen
We had three souls to find in Japan. All three were your typical serial killers, and how sad was it that I was beginning to see serial murderers as run of the mill? One was from the thirteenth century, a woman who’d come to be one of the most
powerful concubines at the time. Mostly because she murdered and schemed, along with the man she served, accumulating wealth beyond imagine. The other was a man who’d enjoyed drowning his victims. He hadn’t been selective at all; it was bad luck if someone just happened to be around when the mood struck him. The third had been an American soldier who had died in Japan after the second World War. The atrocities he’d committed against a people he’d seen as “the enemy” disgusted me.
War was never pretty. There were always those out there who took that additional step and made it even uglier.
Brennan and I appeared on the shore of the small island of Sarushima, which was where our drowner had worked. He’d been a fisherman, and he’d often mixed business and pleasure. It wasn’t until the other people from the area realized that all the murder victims were washing up on the same beach, and always on days when his boat had been seen in the area, that they caught on.
They’d drowned him.
I know that humanity has a distrust of vigilante justice. But I believe that sometimes, it really is the cleanest and most suitable form of justice. I knew for a fact that Hades had not found much fault with those who had partaken in bringing the man to justice. According to Tisiphone, he’d shaken their hands before passing judgment.
We walked along the docks, both of us with a duffel bag slung over our shoulder, ready to drop if we came across our lost soul. We hadn’t said a word to one another since leaving the hotel room in Russia.
My New Guardians were here already. I’d moved them quickly after I’d locked myself in the bathroom for my shower. I’d instructed them to stay out of sight, but I could feel them not far ahead.
And there. There was the energy signature I’d been looking for. I tugged the sleeve of Brennan’s shirt and gave a slight nod of my head to the west, further down the docks.
He gave a short nod. And then he walked off behind a tiny shack with the Japanese word for “bait” emblazoned on it as sign. Within moments, I saw the dark shadow of his panther slinking in the shadows, and I headed toward my soul.
The soul of Hidemi Sato, the drowner, stood on a pier immediately ahead of me.
Guardian (Hidden Book 6) Page 18
