by Amber Garza
Biting down on her lip, she composes herself. “I do get it. I know your dad hurt you. I know he never chose you, but someone else did. Olivia gave up everything for you. She was disowned, ostracized, ridiculed. All because she chose you, Christian.”
Emotion rises in me at her words, and I swallow it down, not wanting to feel it.
“And she’s not the only one. Cal chose you. My parents chose you.” Her eyes crash into mine. “And I chose you.” She pauses, holding my gaze steady. “I still do.”
I want her. Lord knows I want her. More than anything. But I can’t hurt her anymore. I can’t pull her back only to push her away again. How do I make her see that I’m doing this because I care about her?
I put my hand over my heart. “There’s something missing in here now. It’s like a part of me died with him, and I don’t know how to do this anymore.”
One eyebrow cocks. “Do what?”
“This.” I point between us. “I don’t know how to open myself up to you.”
When she smiles, I’m surprised. Then she steps toward me, placing a hand on my waist, and I’m downright stunned. What the hell is she up to? I should draw back, but I stay put, rooted in place. “Don’t you remember what I said about uncomplicating things?”
“Oh, we’re back to that, are we?” I can’t help it. I laugh. And it feels good. Damn good.
She nods. Then before I can stop her, she kisses me. And heaven help me, I respond to it. I more than respond to it. I kiss her back with vigor. Flinging my bat bag on the ground, I sweep my hands up, funneling my fingers through her hair. Gripping her face between my palms, my mouth presses firmly to hers, and I thrust my tongue into her mouth. Her hands slide around my waist, her chest molding to mine. And it’s like we fit perfectly. Like our bodies were made for one another. It scares me, and I jolt backwards, our mouths disconnecting.
Exhaling, I turn from her. “I shouldn’t have done that.”
“Will you stop?” She shouts, frustration in her voice. “Stop feeling sorry for yourself. Stop acting like you don’t deserve to be happy. Yes, your dad rejected you. Yes, he’s gone now. But I’m not, damn it. I’m right here. And I’m not leaving, so you better figure this out.”
I’ve never heard Emmy talk like this before, and honestly, it turns me on a little. Spinning around, I study her. In the moonlight her face is so pale it almost appears translucent. Her eyes are bright, her lips shimmering. When the wind kicks up, her hair swirls around her face, a few strands catching on her long eyelashes. Man, she’s so beautiful that it makes me ache. The familiar longing spreads through my chest, cracking me wide open. As much as I want to deny her words, I know she’s right.
I’m pulling away because I’m scared, but it is a cop-out. There’s no way to protect myself forever. I am going to be hurt again. And I’ll probably be rejected again. But that doesn’t mean I need to close myself off to everyone who loves me. Emmy’s here.
She always has been.
Even when I don’t deserve it.
Even when I’m an ass.
So, why am I punishing her for what my dad’s done?
“My heart chimes for you. Every hour on the hour,” she says with a wink. “And sometimes even in between.”
It’s ridiculous, and cheesy, and such an Emmy thing to say.
And it’s the final straw.
Stepping forward, I wrap my arms around her waist and tug her to me. “That was maybe the cheesiest thing I’ve ever heard.”
“Eh, my mom’s the writer. Not me.” She smiles, her hands fluttering over my chest.
“What kind of ending do you think she’d write for you and me?”
“One where you stop running,” she says simply.
“Do you think that’s possible for a guy like me?”
“I think anything’s possible,” she answers.
I nod, wanting desperately to believe her.
****
“Are you nervous about your first official game of the season tomorrow?” Emmy asks.
“No.” Staring up at the black night sky, I reach for her hand, knotting our fingers together between us. We’re lying on a blanket in the middle of the Prairie Creek Panthers baseball field. I wanted some time alone with my girl tonight. With the season approaching, I’ve been working hard and once the season starts, I’m only going to get busier. We discussed having a picnic out by the lake, but it’s too cold, so we opted for the next best thing. The stadium lights are off, so it’s dark except for the moonlight. Frankly, it’s perfect.
“Really?” She sounds doubtful. “But you always get nervous before a game. I know Cal’s super nervous. Not like he’ll admit it, but I can tell.”
She’s right about Cal. I was with him earlier today and he was super intense. Of course he’s always intense when it comes to baseball. And there’s a lot riding on him this season. A lot riding on all of us actually. I was kind of surprised he didn’t get upset with me when he found out I planned to go out with Emmy tonight. He said he was going to turn in early, get a good night’s sleep. But he encouraged me to hang out with his sister.
In fact, his exact words were, “She helps you get your head on straight.” Then he laughed, shaking his head. “Never thought Emmy would have a calming effect on anyone, but I guess she does.”
Smiling at the memory, I roll my head to the side, studying Emmy’s profile. “No reason for me to be nervous because I’ve got my good luck charm right here.” Squeezing her hand, I flash her a grin. When she smiles back, I marvel at how far we’ve come. It seems crazy that a couple of weeks ago, I was avoiding her. Avoiding this. Contentedness washes over me. With Emmy I feel a peace I’ve never experienced before. I feel whole. I feel accepted. I feel cared for. And it makes me feel like an idiot for trying to run from it.
Her face upturned, she stares at the sky.
“How many stars have you counted?” Hundreds of twinkling lights are splashed across the inky canvas. She’s probably having a field day right now.
“One.” Her neck swivels, her eyes catching mine.
I raise my brows. “One?”
She nods. “Yep. There’s only one star I’ve been focused on tonight. It’s the brightest one out here.” Disconnecting our hands, she hoists herself up on one elbow, her gaze crashing into mine. “You.”
My heart flips in my chest. I roll onto my side and reach for her. Curving my palm around her waist, I scoot her closer. Then I gently cover her lips with mine. After kissing her fruit scented lips softly, I draw back. “Thank you,” I say.
“For what?”
“For not giving up on me.”
“I’ll never give up on you, Christian.” Lifting her hand, she lightly touches my face. Her words are powerful, and her touch is healing. As her face nears mine, I know I’ll be okay. Emmy is mending my broken heart one crack at a time. She’s erasing my pain, stroke by stroke. And one day I know it will be gone for good.
EMMY
It smells like excitement.
It smells like fresh cut grass and leather baseball gloves.
It smells like popcorn and chips.
It smells like my childhood.
I’ve spent so many hours sitting in the stands during baseball games throughout my life, but I love it. I especially love the first game of the season. Nothing beats the buzz of anticipation, the energy radiating around me. Mom and Dad sit a few rows over, sharing a bag of kettle corn. I would sit with them, but I wanted to be in the first row. I wanted to be close to Christian. So close that he could glance over from where he crouches at home plate, and have a clear view of me cheering him on.
It’s the first game I’m attending as his girlfriend. The sentiment is not lost on me. For years I sat in the stands lusting after Christian. I’d watch him with rapt attention, knowing that he saw me as nothing more than his best friend’s little sister. But now he saw me as so much more.
The game is about to start and my legs shake agitatedly. I find myself counting each bounce of my
foot without even meaning to. One. Two. Three. I freeze, smelling her before seeing her. She always did wear too much perfume. I ignore Ashley as she passes me, and I don’t have to see her face to know that it bothers her. She hates when people don’t notice her. Being noticed is pretty much her only goal in life.
Out of the corner of my eye, I see her sit down a few feet from me. Pink flickers in my line of vision, but I keep my gaze trained forward. I’m not exactly surprised that she’s here since she and Josh are still dating, but her presence does put a damper on things. Determined not to let her steal any of my joy, I search for Christian. When I catch a splash of his catcher’s mask from the bullpen, my pulse quickens. And suddenly Ashley and her antics are a million miles away. Chris is all that matters to me right now.
“Hey, Emerson.”
My head snaps up at the sound of Olivia’s voice. She wears a flowing shirt, cut off shorts and Birkenstocks. Her hair is pinned back with bobby pins, and bracelets line her arms. Dan stands on the other side of her. I greet both of them, and then they take a seat next to me. Biting my lip, I return my attention to the field. I’m not sure how Christian will take Dan sitting with us, but I’m hoping he’ll be okay with it.
Honestly, he seems to be accepting Olivia and Dan’s relationship better than at first. The last couple of weeks he’s softened a little toward Dan. I think it has a lot to do with the change in Olivia. She’s happier now, not so sad or stressed. Not that Christian talks about it much. But I don’t press him. Christian has always been a little guarded about his family issues, and I respect that. He’ll open up when he’s ready. Besides, I have an older brother. I know how out of touch guys are with their feelings. I don’t expect Christian to blab on about his feelings like a girl.
The announcer begins talking, pulling me out of my internal thoughts. Olivia reaches over and squeezes my shoulder. I smile, the enthusiasm in the stands contagious. Sitting forward, I watch as the Prairie Creek Panthers take the field. Christian looks so hot in his uniform that my insides quiver. He glances over in my direction swiftly, and I swear I see the flicker of a smile before he takes his position behind home plate. I wish he’d given me more, but it’s okay. I’ll take it. I know how focused the guys get during a game. Any acknowledgment is huge.
Cal throws out his first pitch, and it sails past the batter, sliding seamlessly into Chris’s glove. First strike. I smile. It’s always amazing to watch Cal and Christian in action. Only someone who knows them well can see the silent signals they flash to each other, the unspoken language between them. But I see it, and it makes my heart swell. My boys. That’s what they’ll always be to me.
Since Christian and I started dating, the dynamic has changed. It’s no longer Cal and Chris with me trailing behind. Now I’m more intricately involved. There are times when Christian and I want to be alone, but there are times I give them their space too. Either way, we’re making it work, and Cal is coming around. He doesn’t cringe or whine as often as he used to. We still can’t kiss in front of him without him covering his eyes, but we can hold hands, even hug. Baby steps.
But no matter how we evolve and change over the years, one thing will remain the same. The bond they share, and the bond I share with them. They’ve always provided me protection, a safe place. They’ve been my confidantes, my mentors, my friends. And I know they always will be.
After that batter is struck out, another one approaches. I clap loudly, cheering on the boys, having no doubt the Prairie Creek Panthers will begin their winning streak today. This time the batter hits the ball, and it careens toward second base. Josh leaps for it, but it grazes his glove and lands in the grass. Cal shakes his head. I feel bad that the team didn’t get the out, but a small part of me feels satisfaction that Josh bumbled the play and not Cal or Chris.
Josh kicks the dirt with his cleat, expletives pouring from his mouth. Dan sits forward, as if silently willing his son to get it together. Hayes shouts something out to Josh. I can’t hear what he says, but knowing Hayes I’m sure it’s encouraging. Chase and Nolan offer words of encouragement too, and Josh nods, his confidence returning.
Then to my right, Ashley hollers. “It’s okay, baby.”
I stiffen, knowing it’s not the right thing to do. The girlfriend doesn’t speak during the game. I learned that the hard way. Josh glances over, shooting daggers in her direction. Closing her mouth, she slumps in her seat. Man, this game keeps getting better and better.
Holding my breath, I watch the next batter step up to the plate. He’s a big guy, his muscles bulging. As he swings the bat, I cringe. Clearly he’s a hitter. Cal doesn’t look fazed though, so I sit up straighter. The first pitch is a ball, and I wince.
C’mon, Cal.
The next one is a strike.
Here we go.
Chris and Cal have one of their silent conversations, and I sit up straight, waiting. Sure enough, two more strikes and that guy’s outta here. Only one more out to go, and then we’re up to bat. I find my shoulders relaxing a bit. We’ve got this.
After the next batter takes the plate, Cal fires a pitch. It looks good. And apparently it is, because the batter hits it straight up. I squint trying to see where it goes, only I don’t see it at first. Then again, the sun’s in my eyes. But Chris takes off, moving back toward the fence. Moving toward me. Ah, it must be a foul.
He sprints for the ball, holding out his arm and skidding in the dirt. I hop up, peering down at him. Then I let out a loud shriek when I see the white ball nestled in his brown glove. The stands erupt in cheers. When Christian stands, he holds up the glove, and his teammates holler. Then he throws off his catcher’s mask and whirls around to face the stands.
My heart stops.
His gaze crashes into mine.
I freeze.
Stepping forward, he lifts his free arm and points at me. Then he curls his index finger toward himself, as if motioning me forward. I cock my head to the side, my lips curling a little. What is he doing? The entire place goes silent. My palms moisten, and my legs wobble. But I force myself to move forward like he’s asking.
When I reach the fence, he says, “You’re not gonna leave me hangin’ in front of all these people, are you?”
“What?” I’m confused.
“I need a kiss from my girl.”
My mouth goes dry, my body warming. I look around. “Won’t you get in trouble?”
“Baby, I’m already in trouble. Don’t make it for nothin’.”
Giggling, I move closer. Wrapping my fingers around the cool metal, I angle my face toward Christian’s through the fence. Leaning forward, I press my lips to his. I figure it will be a short kiss. A tiny peck. So I’m surprised when his tongue slips out, coaxing my lips open. I hold tighter to the fence in order to stay upright as our kiss deepens. It’s amazing the affect Christian has on me. I know that I’m in front of a baseball stadium full of people, but for some reason it feels like it’s just the two of us. Like we’re the only two people in the world.
“Alcott, what the hell are you doing?” Coach Hopkins’ voice rings out, jolting me back to reality. “This is a baseball game, not a scene from the Bachelor. Get over here!”
Chris draws his lips back. I blink as if I’m coming out of a daze.
“Emmy,” Christian says softly, his fingers touching the edges of mine where they curl around the fence. “I love you.” With a quick smile, he spins around and jogs toward his coach.
My head spins, and I feel dizzy. Did he say that he loves me?
“Wait!” I call after him. I can’t let him leave after what he said. I need to tell him I feel the same way.
He cranes his neck.
“I love you too,” I say.
“I know,” he responds with a smile.
Stunned, I watch him as he follows his team into the dugout. My whole body heats up, sweat forming on my brow. I feel simultaneously embarrassed and giddy. Unhooking my fingers from the fence, I step away from it. When my gaze sweeps the stands
, I am greeted with awed expressions. Expect for Ashley. She looks downright pissed.
Ignoring her, I walk unsteadily back to my seat. Lowering into it, I try not to look at Olivia. I know she loves me, but I’m not sure how she feels about me making out with her son in the middle of his baseball game. Not exactly a moment for the scrapbook. That reminds me that my parents are sitting a few rows up. Curling in on myself, I wish I could be like a turtle with the ability to hide in its shell. That would be useful right about now. Still, I don’t regret what happened. It was the single most romantic moment of my life. And to top it off, Christian admitted that he loved me. That’s huge.
It’s more than huge.
It’s everything I’ve ever wanted.
THE END
PLAY HARD (Make the Play #2) – Cal’s story - coming winter 2016!
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Author’s note and acknowledgments
The Playing for Keeps series was my first sports series. When the first book, FOR THE WIN, released almost a year ago, I wasn’t sure how my readers would respond to it. But I was pleasantly surprised. Not only did my readers embrace it, but I gained many new readers. I found a whole new audience for my work – a readership hungry for sports romances. So after penning FOR THE SAVE, the last book in the Playing for Keeps series, I decided to keep writing in the sports romance genre.
I’ve always been a fan of small-town romances. I was once a big fan of shows like Dawson’s Creek and One Tree Hill. So I decided to write a series centering around one high school baseball team set in a small town. At first I kicked around the idea of following one couple throughout the series, but the truth is I’ve never been good at that. I like to write spinoffs much more than I like to write actual series. As much as I love every couple I write about, I do get a little bored writing their story after awhile. I enjoy the rush of starting something new, of getting to know new characters. So in the end, I decided to write about a new couple in every book. Still the book is considered a series because the books will need to be read in order. And if you love Christian and Emmy, don’t worry, they will be in the subsequent novels.
