by T. A. Grey
She removed her thoughts, and with it, her tears. But nothing she could do, no matter how hard she concentrated, could remove the suffocating pain surrounding her heart, building in her chest until everything hurt.
“We need to talk,” she said and winced at the croaking miserable sound of her own voice. She hated that sound. It was the voice of a weak person, someone alone and lost in life and that wasn’t her. Closing her eyes, she took a deep breath and called upon her strength. She had it; she knew she did. How else had she put up with Joseph for two fucking years?
When he didn’t say anything, she glanced over. He was looking right at her. His eyes looked sharper than usual, brighter. Probably just from feeding this morning. Her task just became a whole lot harder, because he had really pretty eyes.
“Are you sure you want to do that...?” The way he said it, like she might not enjoy where the talk would lead them, made her hesitate. She shook her head. No, no, they needed to talk. She needed answers.
“Yeah, I’m sure.”
His finger stopped tapping as his hands curled tight around the wheel. “Fine, talk.”
She knew the words that needed to come out, but couldn’t seem to form them. God, what was wrong with her? Was she that fucked up or something? Leaning her head on the window, she banged her head into the glass a three good times. Not enough to hurt, but hopefully to knock some sense into her. God, what she’d do for a drink right now...
Okay, she’d start simple. “What’s with you, today?” She faced him a bit in her seat so she could study him, even though he kept his eyes on the road.
“Nothing. What do you mean?”
She laughed a soft, sarcastic sound. “Excuse me? Don’t lie; you’re smarter than that and I know it. Tell me the truth.”
The corner of his mouth jerked in a twitch. “That’s not an easy answer, Vanessa.”
Pain flared at the inside of her eyes. She squeezed the bridge of her nose and sighed as it alleviated the throbbing if only a little. “Okay, let’s try another one. What are we?”
He glanced at her, then frowned before gazing back at the winding highway. “I’m not sure I understand the question.”
Her jaw slid tight and hard, left then right. She bit out the words feeling anger rising. “What the fuck are we? A couple? Or fuck buddies, maybe? I want you to explain this whole ‘not going back thing’ and what we are. Is that fucking clear enough for you?”
He didn’t look at her. “You should relax. There’s nothing to be upset about.” His words grated on her nerves like a serrated knife.
Her jaw dropped and then unbelievably, she started laughing and couldn’t stop it. She laughed at the absurdity of his response, she laughed at the impossible situation she was in, and mostly she laughed, because otherwise she might break down and cry.
“Please, just answer the question,” she whispered. Her warm breath fogged the window and she watched as the steam appeared then slowly dissipated to reveal the lanes of cars next to them.
She didn’t think he’d answer. But he did, and when the words started flowing she froze in her seat, sight unseeing as she soaked in his words.
“Everything changed the moment I lost control with you. The first time. I come from a strict background, Vanessa. My father married and never strayed as some other men did, and she never strayed either. It wasn’t love or even desire that I know of, but the times and the era. He believed in honor, duty, and law. In doing the right thing. And I believe in that too, all of it. Perhaps, even more so than he did. That’s why I wanted you to obey your father, because it was your duty and for the better of the people. Then you came here.” He shot her a look, his eyes dark with a heady mixture of anger and passion.
“I never thought the man you’d mate would hurt you. A man doesn’t do that. A man protects and honors his woman. That’s the right way, especially for lykaens. I can honestly say that when I met you two years ago, I saw a little girl being rebellious and thinking only of herself. I also never thought your father would settle you with someone unworthy. Not having met him, I still trusted his opinion. I was wrong. So now, what does that make us? That’s a hell of a question to ask and I’m not sure if you’ll like the answer.” His voice faded and though her voice croaked a bit she managed to respond.
“Tell me.”
He rubbed a hand over his chin slowly. The bristly sound of his chin stubble made her palms itch to touch it. “I’m old, Vanessa. Old as dirt next to you. When you came into my headquarters...I didn’t see a rebellious girl. I saw a strong woman. A woman with fight and courage, even if she was creating a scene. It surprised even me, but I liked it. I like you.”
He cast a look at her, his eyes hard as if daring her to speak otherwise, challenging. “Having you in my house...I like even more. I’m still not sure why. I can feel relaxed with you. You almost make me laugh.”
“Well, I am funny,” she muttered.
“To say I think you’re beautiful shouldn’t need to be said.” His eyes trailed down her body and his look burned her. She suddenly had the urge to crack the window and let in a cool breeze. “Every time I see you...I feel strange. It’s almost uncontrollable. No, it is uncontrollable and for some reason it feels like a rush when I finally let go with you. I’m not about to lose that.” He glared at her as if daring her to contradict him or make an argument.
She couldn’t even if she wanted to. Her tongue felt too big for her mouth and she had trouble making a coherent thought. All of his thoughts were way beyond, and a little bit stranger, deeper, than anything she’d have guessed.
“Does that answer your question?”
“Umm...” She had to think about it, had to remember what her initial question had been. Oh, right. What ‘were’ they? “I don't know.”
With a frustrated growl, he swerved over to the shoulder and threw the car into park. He turned to her, his big body shadowing her as he rested an arm behind her seat. She started panting at the wild look in his eyes. He looked dangerous, as if he might attack her at any second. He was so out of her league, it wasn’t even funny and now she suddenly felt very small and inadequate compared to him and all that stuff he’d just said.
He cupped her face with his free hand, forcing her to look at him. “That means that you’re mine now. It means that only I touch you. I will take care of Joseph, and I will take care of you.”
She was pretty sure she was panting and she tried to close her mouth, but she couldn’t. “Why?” she whispered.
He looked up as if seeking guidance, then glared at her. “I already explained that.” He looked annoyed.
“But, why?” she insisted. She had to know. Not some long explanation that would take her a day to rewind and think about, but something short that her baffled mind could wrap around right now.
“Because, I want you. Because, you came back into my life for a reason, and because...” he paused to swipe his warm thumb across her bottom lip. “When I’m with you, I feel good.”
Her chest rose and fell in hard, fast waves. With his words hanging in the air, she realized just how close he was to her, how good his hand felt on her face, how much she liked the masculine scent of him, the stubble on his chin...everything. His eyes flicked down to her mouth and stayed there. Her gut tightened in reflex, something hot and wet gushing between her legs. All with that one look. His eyes shuttered to a hooded position, then he was moving closer. His lips caught the corner of her mouth and her breath stilled, her chest squeezing so impossibly tight from the lack of air.
Then she felt it. His harsh breaths blowing across her lips and she nearly burst apart. He felt it, too. He was right there with her, wrapped up in a tight bubble where only they existed in this moment of time.
His lips slid over and covered hers. A needy sound escaped her at the firm press of his lips. Sense and reason flew right out the window. Hands threaded in hair, lips meshed hard and tongues glided against each other. They were like animals eating at each other, trying to get as close
together as possible by the mouth. She folded her body against him, a needy moan rumbling from her as his arms swept across her back and crushed her to him. The seatbelt, the stupid seatbelt held her back, kept her from climbing into his lap and rubbing her core against him. She needed him, here and now.
She pulled back, breathing hard and then they both dove at each other. His hand wound up under her skirt, bare skin meeting bare skin. Only his touch made her hotter; she spread her legs and when he pushed her panties to the side and touched her, she worked faster. She tugged at his pants, cursing very loud how much she hated his fucking belt, then released the zipper just as his finger plunged inside her.
She melted into the seat as pleasure engulfed her like a blast of sunshine. He started pumping, breathing hard, and apparently, unable to wait for her, buried his face in her neck to lavish wet sucking kisses there. Oh God, she was going to come, just from that.
“Mmm,” she moaned just as a piercing screech slammed her so fast and hard back into reality that she only had one second to look in the rearview mirror to the car coming.
The crash came hard, fast. Everything exploded. The loud grinding sound of metal crushing metal pierced her ears. Time slowed. She couldn’t hear anything after that, only a slight high-pitched ringing as she was jerked forward in her seat. Her face nearly slammed into the airbag just as it exploded, blowing hard against her face and shooting her head back into the seat. Her head bounced, her brain swishing around hard form the jolt. It didn’t stop. She felt the momentum. The big SUV surging forward. Somehow, she managed to loll her head to the left to see the window gone, bits of glass covering the console and hood. The sharp shards flew back inside at her as the car’s momentum pushed faster. Then it stopped.
She blinked at the empty seat next to her. Brayden was gone. She couldn’t think much more than that. She knew she should move, unbuckle her seatbelt and go help Brayden, but everything felt sluggish.
She blinked and it seemed to take forever for her eyes to open back up again. Black and gray spots dotted her vision. She thought she whispered his name. Thought she reached for her seatbelt but felt a sharp stab and stopped, then the squeal of peeling tires registered, but it sounded soft and faraway. A hard jolt smashed into the car again and she was flung forward again in her seat, even harder than before.
Her ribs screamed in pain as the seatbelt jerked on her hard to keep her in place. Her face bounced off the already deployed airbag and her head slammed back so hard into the seat everything went black. She didn’t even have to time to call out his name again.
Chapter 13
Vanessa’s eyes shot open and confusion quickly dawned. She was in a room that put Brayden’s house to shame. She was on a canopied sleigh bed with white gauzy curtains hanging in beautiful arches from each corner. The walls held works of art that looked old in their aged wooden frames.
A massive wooden hutch sat against the far wall with an assortment of the matching furniture along the walls. It looked expensive; it looked rich. Where the hell was she?
“Brayden?” she called out, only to find her voice a mere croak of sound.
Then, the pain registered in a flash. Her hand flew to her throat and found the skin rough and scratchy like sandpaper. She winced as she prodded it then tossed back the covers and slowly stood. A rush of blood flowed through her straight to her legs. She stood wobbling at first, then with growing strength. She walked across the room on a plush middle-eastern looking rug to the door. Some parts of it, especially near the corners, were thread-barren and worn out in color, but the overall pattern and vivid red, blues, and tans, still looked beautiful. She had to stop halfway across the room and lean heavily against a rocking chair for support. Breathing was hard and each breath pinched her ribs where the seatbelt had been. She didn’t want to look, but she’d bet she had a nasty bruise covering her waist where the belt had been.
Footsteps came, closing in on the door, then it opened and confusion set in. “What are you doing here?”
The older pack healer from her Kategan cousins’ pack smiled big. Her blonde hair hung loose and curling around her shoulders. She looked so vibrant and happy. “I live here, honey.”
Vanessa scrubbed a hand across her forehead trying to make her brain work. She remembered the car accident, then that was it. “What happened? Where’s Brayden?”
“Here, sit down first, then we’ll talk. You really shouldn’t be out of bed yet.”
Her legs felt so weak that she let Christine lead her back to the bed and put her in it like a child. After she settled, she leveled her gaze on the older pack healer. “Okay, spill.”
Christine smiled and pulled a bag out from beneath the side table next to the bed. She pulled out a jar with some kind of wet gunk inside that made Vanessa’s nose curl even though couldn’t smell it yet. It just looked nasty.
“You’re at Dmetri’s and my place. Brayden brought you here.”
“Is he okay?” she blurted out.
Christine’s saucy wink instantly made her tense shoulders relax. She wouldn’t wink if it was bad, right? “He’s fine. You took the brunt of it. He had some cuts, but he’ll heal fast. Even faster, if he’d of let me put my salve on him. Oh well, men, you know? Anywho, good to see you, Vanessa. Though it’d be nice to actually see you when you weren’t hurt for once.” She laughed at her own joke, then gently tugged Vanessa’s shirt up.
Vanessa lifted her back off the bed so she could tug it up past her bra. She looked down and grimaced. Nasty barely covered how awful her stomach looked. She had a black and purple bruise that went from her right ribcage down to her left hip from where the seatbelt had been. The thing looked radioactive or something, because surrounding that nasty dark line was even more colors—all an assortment of ugly ones in dark yellows and sunburn reds and garish blues.
Christine fingered some of the goop on her hand then rubbed it across her stomach. “This’ll help, trust me. And don’t worry, it doesn’t stink.” She gave Vanessa a pointed look then laughed. “I know that’s what most people think when they see it. But really, it’s a mixture of herbs with some petroleum jelly; my own concoction! The jelly helps it to glide and stay on. I even added a touch of mint just so it’d smell kind of nice.”
Vanessa sniffed and still winced. “Smells like Vapor Rub.”
Christine shrugged. “Would you rather it smell as bad as you thought it would?”
“Hell, no,” she muttered.
That done, Christine went into the adjoining bathroom to wash her hands then came out drying them on a dark brown towel. “Brayden went to interview some lady or something, I don’t know. Said he’d be back soon.”
“Oh.” She tried to hide her disappointment, but she must have failed, because Christine’s face instantly drooped with a frown. She came and sat on the bed next to her.
“Hey, what’s wrong?”
What was wrong? Hell, she wasn’t even sure yet. What she did know was that she didn’t like waking up in a strange place without him. She didn’t like not being able to see his injuries for herself, and she really didn’t like that he left without waiting for her to wake up so he could at least fill her in on what happened.
“Nothing.” She forced a tight smile. “Do you know when he’ll be back?”
Christine gasped and her eyes widened as if something important just dawned on her. “You and him...” She didn’t say the words, but instead made crude moaning and kissing sounds as her eyes rolled to the back of her head.
Vanessa tried not to laugh, but she couldn’t contain it. “Sort of...” she said with a shrug.
Christine’s eyes lit up. “That is awesome! I always told Dmetri that man needed a woman. What kind of good looking guy spends all his time alone like that?” She shook her head. “What a waste.”
“Yeah,” Vanessa agreed with another tight smile.
Christine eyes grew serious, her smile small but strong, then she cupped Vanessa’s hand in her own. “Okay, tell me everything. What’
s going on?”
Maybe it was having another woman to talk to or Christine’s open honesty, but Vanessa found herself spilling the beans about everything. From what happened after she was kidnapped at the Kategans two years ago, to the mating and finally leaving Joseph. When she got to the parts involving Brayden, her cheeks burned and she wished like hell they didn’t. She didn’t mention any of the kisses, the amazing sex, the way he could make her entire body burn even on the side of a busy highway in broad daylight. But Christine saw that blush, heard her stumble over those parts of the story, and smiled. And what a smile it was—pure sexy knowing woman.
Christine winked. “You’re in real good hands with Brayden. Considering I’ve never seen him with a woman, you must really mean something to him.”
Vanessa’s heart leapt at the thought. Stupidly she said, “Really?”
Christine nodded slowly, her smile curling bigger. “Oh, yeah. You’ve broken him out of his shell. Hell, look at it—you both stayed here with us last night. Everything he’s used to is jumbled right now. I say take advantage of it while you can.” Her smile turned kind of sad. “You find love like that and you shouldn’t let it go, no matter who’s in the way.”
Vanessa’s face burned red and hot. “I didn’t say anything about love,” she said quickly.
Christine grinned, then winked. “I know. I’m going to get some food for you then I’ll be right back. Stay put,” she added firmly.
She left and Vanessa slammed her head back into the pillow. Love? Why did that word make her heart flutter and beat in fear at the same time?
After a full belly and a long bath, Vanessa’s moods managed to swing from happy, to content, to angry, to really pissed off. It really didn’t help that every single room she went in, even the damn bathroom, had a clock in it. So, as she bathed, because standing for too long wore her out, she got to stare at the clock and watch the hours fly by. First one, then two, then more and more until her teeth were grinding into sawdust.
