“I don’t want shit from him. This might not even be his baby.” Portia nodded and looked away.
“And if it is? Then what?” I sighed and allowed for a few tears to fall down my face.
“Then we co-parent. I don’t want him,” I replied.
“Good,” Portia said and walked out of the bathroom. I sat down on the bench in the bathroom and knew I was fucked. For some reason, I just couldn’t find my happy.
****
“Well, you are pregnant, Olivia. Twenty weeks to be exact,” my doctor said and Sophie gasped. I asked her to come along with me for support. Out of all of the women Sophie and I just clicked. I wanted Sariel to come also but she was out of town with her husband Luke.
“Okay, so what does that mean? I don’t even look pregnant,” I said looking at her. Doctor Stanley smiled at me.
“Well, you do have a little pudge. I don’t recommend for my patients to get pregnant so soon like this. Your body hasn’t had time to heal from Orabella, but still this is a blessing. Do you wanna know the sex?” she asked. I looked at Sophie then at her. I couldn’t believe this was happening.
“Yeah, I guess.” Doctor Stanley put the monitor back onto my stomach and zoomed in between my baby’s legs. I closed my eyes and Sophie laughed.
“He has his thing out already, O,” she said and I couldn’t help but to cry. Damn I’m having a little boy. A son like wow. I covered my face with my hands and started crying. Sophie hugged me while Doctor Stanley cleaned me up.
“It’s okay. Fuck everything else that you’re thinking about and look at what you have. Another son, Olivia. God’s giving you another boy,” Sophie said getting choked up and hugged me tighter. I nodded and we cried together.
Two hours later, I walked into my house with a wet face. All day I had been crying at the what’ if’s. What would Kadar do once he found out? What would he say? Wondering if I was going to have to shoot his ass for jumping on me or some shit. I couldn’t believe I was about to have another baby and a son at that. I was so conflicted because I was pregnant with another little boy, but this wasn’t Kadar’s son. It couldn’t be because we had just started back having sex. I could play with the hope that he was, but I would only be fooling myself. I couldn’t lie to him like that.
“Bae ,why the fuck haven’t you been answering your phone! Is everything okay?” Kadar asked walking down the stairs with Bella in his arms. He looked at me and his face softened. He rushed over to me and grabbed my face.
“What’s wrong? What happened?” I shook my head and walked into the family room. I sat down on the sofa and pulled the ultrasound pictures out of my purse. My heart was beating so hard that I felt like I was going to have a fucking heart attack. Kadar sat Bella in her playpen and walked over to me. I was terrified to look him in the face, but I wasn’t going to be a bitch about. What was done was done. I hadn’t cheated on him, but still I knew that this was some fucked up shit. Now, I would see what the consequences of my actions would be.
“Kadar, you know that I love you, right?” I asked looking up at him. Kadar touched the bottom of my face gently.
“Yeah, I do. Calm down and tell me what’s up? You got a nigga scared,” he said chuckling. I handed him the pictures with shaky hands and Kadar looked through them. He looked at me with a smile. “Damn so you pregnant? I know it’s a little early after Bella, but we’ll be good. You thought that we wouldn’t?” I shook my head trying to find my voice. I stood up and decided to get a little space in-between me and him. In the past, I wouldn’t have been worried, but after fighting his ass in my old house I knew what he was capable of.
“Yes, I am worried, Kadar, because this isn’t your son……..it’s Angel’s.”
Boom!
My lamp flew into the wall and Bella screamed at the top of her lungs. I rushed over to her and picked her up. Shit, I knew he wouldn’t do anything to me while I held her.
“Yep, you got it,” Kadar said putting the pictures in his pocket. He walked towards me and I took several steps back. His brows drew into his face until he frowned. “I’m not about to do shit to you, O. I just need for you to clarify what you just said. Are you telling me you pregnant by Angel?”
I nodded looking him in the eyes and he bit down so hard onto his bottom lip that he broke the skin. He turned and walked out of the condo taking his cellphone and car keys with him. I pulled out my phone to call him and he sent my call to voicemail. I didn’t want him to do anything crazy, so I called Aamil. He picked up on the second ring sounding fatigued.
“What up, O, you good?” he asked and yawned. I wiped my face wishing I were.
“Aamil, I’m sorry for waking you up, but this is serious. I just found out that I’m pregnant with Angel’s baby and Kadar left with the ultrasound picture. I don’t want him to do anything dumb, so can you please call and check up on him?” Aamil let out a ragged breath and sighed.
“Damn…yeah, alright, I’ll call him now,” he said and hung up. I took my baby upstairs and prayed that her father wasn’t out making any bad decisions. She needed him in her life even if he planned on walking out of mine again.
Chapter Twenty-Two
Kadar
“I done been shot in the face, jumped by ten niggas and even in a car accident and none of that compared to how bad I feel right now. I wanna go kill this nigga,” I said with my gun on my lap. My brothers nodded looking at me. We sat inside of the warehouse in Southwest Detroit drinking and smoking. My first thought was to run over to Angel’s and put two in his shit, but I knew that killing him would only be the beginning of more fucking drama. I decided to come to the warehouse and chill out. I was so fucking hurt. I had never felt no shit like this not even when Drew left me.
“Man, I don’t even know what the fuck to say other than y’all wasn’t really together when it happened. You was jumping from bitch to bitch so you couldn’t expect O to play the sidelines. She has never been that kind of woman,” Kasam said and I nodded my head agreeing with him. I finished off my 1738 and looked at him.
“I know, but damn Angel? You fucking this nigga raw and shit like you ain’t my fucking bitch. A motherfucka I gotta fucking do business with and now you carrying this nigga’s seed? I could crack her fucking head open!” I yelled. Aamil shook his head and patted my back. He passed me another bottle of 1738 and I opened it. I was so fucked up behind this shit. I honestly didn’t know what to do.
“So, you not proposing to her in Mexico? I done brought that damn white tux and shit you gon’ marry her ass nigga,” Kasam said making us laugh. I was planning on proposing to O at my grandfather’s house in Mexico then marrying her on her birthday, but shit now I didn’t know.
“Man you know you love that fucking girl. This nigga Angel though. His ass need to be handled though. I told that nigga to leave her alone months ago and he told me I was tripping. That he would never do no shit like that. That’s why when I saw him with her in Chicago, I checked his ass and he told me that they was only friends. He a pussy ass nigga and I’m mad at myself because I let that fucking contract blind me to what that nigga was really doing,” Ameer said shaking his head. I did feel like Ameer was hot and cold with that shit with Angel, so I nodded agreeing with his ass. One minute Ameer would tell me to watch the nigga the next Ameer bringing the nigga over to my fucking house. Ameer’s ass loves money, but I’m his fucking brother; he should have put me first.
“Look it is what it is. The shit is done and now my O is about to have this nigga’s baby. If I can’t kill this nigga, then I just might lose my fucking mind.”
“I feel you this some fucked up shit….Aye ain’t his old bitch a model?” Kasam asked suddenly smiling. I shrugged but Ameer nodded.
“Yeah, she do shit for department stores, but she be in them booty magazines too. Wasn’t she just on the set the other day?” Ameer asked Kasam and they both started laughing. Aamil and I looked at them niggas wondering what the fuck was funny.
“What the fuck so funny?”
Aamil asked them. Kasam pulled out his cellphone and went down to his text messages. He pulled up a video and sat his phone on the table so we all could see it. A video of who I guessed was Angel’s bitch all over the nigga from Kasam’s group Malano. She was giggling and telling him she liked his music. Being a typical groupie bitch. You could see that they were on a video set. The video cut off and I frowned looking at him.
“What the fuck that’s supposed to do for me?” Kasam laughed putting his phone away.
“The best revenge would be popping that bitch open and showing it to him but O scares the fuck out of me, so I got the next best thing. I’ma send my young niggas on that bitch and when I say this video gon’ be World Star ready, it will be. You see how she was geeking? Lano said that bitch like to snort coke so she will be an easy target. Let that nigga start talking out the side of his neck to you and we will make his baby momma the next Pinky in this bitch,” Kasam replied. I nodded and we all chuckled. I appreciated these niggas being here with me because if they wasn’t I was sure I would have had my ass back in Angel’s house probably killing him this time though.
A few hours later, I found myself climbing into bed with O drunker than a motherfucka.
“Please don’t leave me,” O said quietly. It had to be four in the morning and I was so drunk Aamil had to bring me home. I rolled onto my back and looked up at the ceiling. I felt like maybe this was my fucking karma for doing her so wrong. I fucked around on her with Drew and did the shit until I had to stop. Then when she called out Angel’s name, I lost it and started fucking any bitch I wanted to. If she knew how much pussy I had when we was apart, she wouldn’t be lying next to me right now. I wrapped it up though. I would never fuck some random hoe raw, but yet she had went and fucked Angel raw. My only question was why. Did she love that bitch ass nigga?
“What’s really good with you and this nigga, O? Did you love him? Why the raw fucking?” I asked just having to know. Olivia turned to me and grabbed my arm. I moved her hand away and she sat up in the bed.
“No, I didn’t love him. I was caught up in the moment and it happened. I love you, Kadar. We’re happy baby and on the right track,” she replied. I chuckled still feeling drunk as hell. All types of thoughts were swimming around in my head.
“Yeah, okay. On the right track to you bringing another nigga’s baby into this world. I would never ask you to end that life because I’m not that type of nigga, but I honestly don’t know what to say, O. You got me questioning a lot of shit right now.” I could hear her start to cry, but I just didn’t have it in me to comfort her. Shit after what she dropped on me I needed her ass to be comforting me not the other way around. “If I would have gotten somebody pregnant, you would have left my ass. Have you told him?”
“No,” she replied quietly. I rolled onto my side and stretched out.
“Don’t. I know that you and him will need to co-parent, but I don’t want that nigga coming at this situation like he winning. We can tell him together and then I guess go on from there.”
“Well, am I still coming with you to Mexico?” I thought about all of the shit I had planned for her then I thought about her son that she was carrying by another nigga and I could feel my fucking stomach turn. I loved the shit out of O and I guess now would be a test at how much. Did I walk away from her or try to make it work with an outside child and all?
“Let me think about it, Olivia,” I replied and closed my eyes. I needed to really debate on what to do and I couldn’t do that shit with her ass all over me because no matter how mad I was at her, I still loved her. I still wanted her to carry my last name even though I felt like she had betrayed me in the worst way.
****
“So, you’re not doing it?” Quinn asked me. I sat inside of my newly opened loan company with Olivia on my mind. For weeks, I had to put off going to Mexico and hadn’t discussed the baby with her, but she was now showing and I knew that it was time for us to tell Angel. Shit it was time for me to handle that situation as well. I had been so fucked up behind all of this that I had been fucking sick myself. Sophie said I had symptoms with O, but how could that be when I wasn’t her son’s father?
“Look, I just don’t know. I still do the counseling with her, but shit is weird between us. I keep looking at her stomach and I don’t know how to act. I’m lying in bed with a woman that’s carrying another nigga’s seed.” Quinn’s brown face hardened as she looked at me. Hayward shook his head and slowly stood up. He quickly walked out of the room and closed the door behind him.
“You gotta be fucking kidding me? The reason y’all was separated was because of you. She moves on even if it was to someone you didn’t like and now she’s the bad guy because of it. That some pussy ass shit and you know it!” Quinn jumped up and smoothed out her black sweater dress. “My sister don’t need no nigga because she has me and if I gotta be a fucking daddy to both her kids, I will be. She loves your black ass even when we all said she shouldn’t. If you walk away from her right now when she needs you the most, then you a hoe ass nigga and she don’t need you any way. Wasting my fucking time by having me come down here when I could have been getting some dick. Here’s the ring,” she said and slapped the Harry Winston box onto my desk. Quinn walked out of my office and slammed the door so hard that the wall shook. I wanted to fuck her ass up for doing that shit, but I didn’t even have it in me. I had bigger shit to worry about. I put Olivia’s ring away and called Angel. This phone call was way overdue.
“Damn I didn’t expect to see you calling me,” he said picking up the call. I pulled out O’s ring and looked at it. I knew even though I couldn’t say it right now that I still wanted to marry her. I sure as hell didn’t want her to be with this fuck nigga.
“Look me and O need to talk to you.”
“About what?” he asked with an attitude.
“Some shit, so when can we meet up?”
“I’m in Chicago right now. I won’t be in Michigan for a few weeks, so I’ll hit you up then,” he replied and ended the call with his bitch ass. I put my phone away and my cellphone vibrated on my desk. I looked at the screen and O’s name popped up.
Olivia: No matter what I love you Kadar and I never stopped. The real test of love is holding on when everything is telling you to let go. Fight for us and fight for me because it would never be this easy for me to say goodbye to you. I’m home waiting for you, Kadar. O
Me: I’ll be home, you know that.
I put my phone away and grabbed my head. I had a fucking migraine out of this world and I still had a few more people to meet with. Hopefully, once the day was done, I felt better about my situation with O.
Chapter Twenty Three
Drew
“So what did she say?” I asked Aamil. He looked up from his phone and slowly shook his head.
“She said that he was walking home from school and somebody robbed him. He’s okay, but he had to get stiches. I’m happy he good, but I told her ass to not call me,” he replied. Mina’s oldest son was robbed walking to her best friend’s house and he was cut pretty bad. Aamil was playing it cool for me, but I knew he was worried about them. I knew he loved those kids and as much I was wanted to tell him to just be through with them, I couldn’t find it in myself to say it. I walked over to my husband and sat down next to him. I rubbed his strong back and could feel all types of knots in his shit.
“Baby you are so tense. Let’s go check on him so you can see for yourself that he’s okay.” Aamil quickly shook his head and stood up.
“Nah, we not doing that. Mina done did all types of shit to you and that bitch still on the run,” he said shutting my suggestion down. I stood up and walked up on him. I wrapped my arms around his body and hugged him tightly.
“Aamil, I love you and when you hurt I do too. If those kids need you, then you should be there for them. I had the problem with their mother, but she done said fuck them and focused on trying to kill me now. If you wanna be around them, it’s fine.” Aamil looked at me
.
“I appreciate you saying that, but I can’t. I know how you feel about the situation and without them in the mix, we been better than we ever been. I got my wife back and I’m not going back to how we were before. I can’t focus on anything but you and my family. Let me call some people and see if her brother can take them in. He don’t fuck with Mina like that, but he they only option. If not then her friend is going to have to give them to the state. I want nothing but the best for them Drew, but we better without them,” he said and I nodded. Damn who was this man? I mean he was right things had been better and we had been so fucking happy. Shit he had me feeling like a fool for even suggesting he get back started with Mina’s kids. I was just trying to be there for him because I knew that he was feeling bad about leaving them like that, but his suggestion was way better than mine. I leaned up on my toes and kissed him. Damn I loved him so much.
“Sounds like a plan daddy. So, what do we do now?” Aamil picked me up and carried me to the bed. We fell back onto it and he smiled up at me.
“Right now all you gotta do is ride this dick. Let your man handle everything else. You think you can do that?” he asked getting hard beneath me. I nodded and bent down to give him a sensual kiss on the lips. Aamil bit my bottom lip and smacked me on the ass. I undid his belt buckle and pulled his dick out. Aamil pulled my nightgown over my head and leaned up to pull one of my nipples into his mouth. I moaned as slid my panties to the side so that I could slide down on him.
“Oh…fuck, Aamil!” I moaned as he entered me. Aamil let my nipple go and slapped my ass with both hands.
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