by Brenda Novak
Was it Scott? That hadn’t been a Camaro, but Scott could’ve been with someone else...
Because Savanna had just moved in, it didn’t occur to him that whoever it was had been visiting her—until he heard footsteps running across the bridge.
“I’m so sorry,” she said, coming up behind him. “I can’t believe she did this!”
He turned to face her. “She?”
“That was Gordon’s mom. She came all the way out here from Utah, arrived a few minutes ago. We argued on my porch, but not for long. Something suddenly came over her, and she jumped back into her car and took off.”
“You don’t know why.”
She shook her head. “I thought it would be much more difficult to get rid of her. I’m still trying to figure out what happened.”
It wasn’t until that moment, when Savanna stepped up next to him, that he even thought about the fact that he hadn’t taken the time to dress before dashing out of the house. He was standing outside in his underwear and no shoes. But he wasn’t concerned for the sake of modesty. Savanna had seen him before. He wasn’t completely naked, anyway.
Resting his hands on his hips, he frowned at the crushed metal. “Was she drunk?”
“I don’t think so. To be honest, she sounded more lucid than usual.”
“So what’d she come here for?”
“To get what she’s wanted from the start—money for Gordon’s defense.”
He pulled his hair back. “What’d you tell her?”
“I refused to give her any. I thought I’d have a real fight on my hands. I had Branson’s baseball bat hidden behind the door, in case I had to defend myself. That shows you what I was expecting. She’d sent me a text earlier saying she was going to make me sorry for abandoning Gordon, as if she was coming out, looking for revenge. So I was shocked when she left out of the blue and without getting too ugly.”
Gavin scowled at her. “If she’s been threatening you, and you thought she might act on those threats, why didn’t you call me? Or at least let me know the moment she arrived?”
Looking a bit rattled, she hugged herself. “I didn’t want to wake you. And it seems as if, I don’t know, as if you don’t really want to see me anymore. I want to give you your space, if that’s true. Don’t want to keep bothering you, especially for more favors.”
That was why she’d asked if she could accept Eli’s invitation to the barbecue. She thought he was trying to pull away, and he was, but not for the reasons she supposed.
“What’s happening in my life has nothing to do with you,” he said, but he realized almost as soon as he’d spoken those words that they weren’t strictly true. He’d barely met her, and yet she’d made a huge impact on everything. He couldn’t imagine himself being quite this reluctant to get back with Heather, to do the right thing by the child she carried, if he didn’t have someone else he wanted more so close at hand.
“I came on too strong the other night. I’m sorry about that,” she said. “My whole world is jumbled right now. I’m not thinking straight, not acting like I should. Most people get to know each other before...well, before that. Hitting you up so soon must’ve put you in an awkward position. Just because I’m flailing around like a drowning person doesn’t mean I need to drag you down with me.” She laughed, a short, self-deprecating chuckle. “Anyway, you’ve been great. Really. I hope you’ll forgive me. I hate that I might’ve messed up our friendship.”
“Savanna...”
She rubbed her arms as she gazed up at him. “What?”
He heard the uncertainty in her voice. “You haven’t messed up anything.”
Her eyebrows gathered. “But you just want to be platonic friends, right? I crossed the line? I mean...I thought you were into it, too, but...I’ve been thinking about how forward I was that night and feeling like an idiot.”
“There’s no need to feel like an idiot. I wanted you then. And I want you now.” Taking her hands, he pulled her against him and lowered his head to kiss her.
She seemed startled when what started as a soft exploration of her mouth turned into an intense and hungry devouring. He knew it wasn’t consistent with the subdued response he’d been giving her recently. But the desire that welled up was carrying him away like a tidal wave. He couldn’t summon any resistance; he wanted her too badly. “You taste like honey,” he told her. “And you feel—God, you feel like heaven.”
He’d never had sex outside, but he’d lived in the country for only two months. He loved the privacy his new place gave him, because he didn’t want to let her go. He knew his conscience would reassert itself if he broke away, even for a short time. Or she’d say she had to get back to her house or something.
Her fingers slipped into his hair, pulling out the tie that was falling out, anyway, and he heard her groan as he kissed her neck. “I don’t have any birth control on me,” he admitted, although that was probably obvious, since he had no way of hiding anything, including his raging hard-on.
“I went back on the pill after...after we were together,” she said.
He lifted his head. “You did?”
“I hoped you’d be interested in more than one night.”
“I am interested.” He peeled off her sweater and lifted her T-shirt over her head before tossing both onto the grass nearby.
“I don’t know how long it takes before it’s effective, though,” she said with some caution.
“Hopefully, it’s already kicked in. I’ll pull out, just in case.”
“Okay, but...wouldn’t you rather go in the house?”
He wouldn’t. He wanted to feel her close around him immediately. Wanted to drive into her as if there wasn’t any reason he couldn’t have her. “No. I need you now,” he said, and it was true. He needed her to help him forget what lay ahead...
She didn’t seem opposed to that idea. When her hand slipped into his boxers and her fingers curled around him, he felt his knees go weak.
She was wearing a pair of high-waisted cutoffs. They showed off her legs, which he loved, but he wanted to see everything. He helped her shimmy out of them and removed the thong she wore underneath. Then, lifting her in his arms, he pressed her up against the door of his truck and buried himself inside her.
Wrapping her legs around his waist, she clung to him as he began to thrust. Making love while standing took strength. Soon, he was too breathless to kiss her with any skill, so he buried his face in her neck. And that was when everything besides her ceased to exist. All worries. All cares. Even the stars. Nothing could wrest his attention from the softness of her breasts, the scent of her skin, the warm wetness he loved most and the little sounds she occasionally made as he drove into her. He knew he wasn’t being as gentle as he probably should, but he could feel her abandoning all restraint, and that encouraged him to do the same.
When he felt that sweet upwelling of pleasure, he didn’t want to pull out. But he had no choice. With a curse for the self-mastery it required, he withdrew at the last second.
The whole thing hadn’t lasted long, but it had been particularly momentous. They stared at each other for several seconds as if they were both surprised by the intensity of the experience and the connection they felt because of it.
“I should get back inside. Would you like to come over and spend the rest of the night?” she asked softly.
He got the impression she was testing him to see if he’d react as he had before—by distancing himself. And his heart sank as he watched her dress, because he had no choice. “I’m coming over to make sure Dorothy doesn’t return and cause you any trouble. But...”
“But?” She paused to look up at him. Obviously, she’d heard the reservation in his voice.
He raked his fingers through his tangled hair. “Before I touch you again, I’ve got to tell you something.”
* * *
“She’s pregnant?” After the passionate encounter they’d just shared, Savanna didn’t know how to react. She felt numb as she sat in her kitchen, staring across the table at Gavin, who’d gone back to his place to get dressed before showing up at her door.
The regret she saw in his body language helped a little, but it couldn’t do much to soften the blow, because what he’d told her changed everything. She’d believed she wasn’t ready for another relationship, and yet she’d done nothing except fantasize about her new neighbor ever since she met him. He made her feel good, and after Gordon had made her feel bad, for so long, that was a powerful thing. She’d even had the crazy thought that perhaps she’d been meant to come to Silver Springs, that maybe her father was acting as some sort of guardian angel, guiding her to a better man, someone with whom she could be truly happy.
Now that she’d heard about Heather, however, that just seemed silly...
“Yes,” he said.
“And it could be your child.”
“We broke up a little over two months ago, and I haven’t been with her since, but...she’s about that far along.”
“When did you learn about it?”
A sheepish expression claimed his face. “Last Saturday. After I got home from my gig that night, she was waiting for me.”
“So...before we slept together the first time.”
He winced. “Yeah. I’m sorry about that. I should’ve said something sooner, but...I don’t know. I didn’t want to face it myself, didn’t want to voice it because that would only make it more real.”
“That’s why you backed off so fast. Because of Heather.”
“Because of the situation, yes.”
She cradled a glass of water between both hands. “And...what were you thinking tonight?”
“I have no excuse for tonight. I knew I shouldn’t touch you. I just couldn’t help myself.”
“I see.” She cleared her throat in order to fill the silence, to give herself some time to think. “I saw Heather in front of your house when I went out to get my mail yesterday. She seemed quite curious about who I was, when I’d arrived and whether I was married.”
“That last part doesn’t surprise me,” he said wryly. “She views any other single, attractive woman as a rival.”
“Considering what we’ve done, I’m not sure we can fault her for that—”
“True,” he broke in. “With you, she has reason. But that hasn’t been the case in the past.”
Savanna struggled to overcome the disappointment she felt. “Does she know that...that we...”
“No.” He spoke immediately, saving her the trouble of trying to finish that sentence. “I haven’t told her.”
Savanna was relieved. She didn’t want to have an instant enemy in Silver Springs. And yet... “Are you going to?” she asked.
“I haven’t decided. We’re not exclusive, if that’s what you’re wondering. It’s not as if I’ve been cheating on her. But I will have to restrict my...activities at some point. And soon. I can’t be sleeping with you if I’m trying to make something work with her. That wouldn’t be fair to anybody.”
“True.” Savanna wanted to ask if he’d slept with Heather since sleeping with her, but she didn’t feel she had the right. She’d been the one to stipulate that there were no expectations attached to their night together. Of course, they hadn’t established any “rules” for what’d occurred between them at the truck. That had come out of nowhere. But she could see why he might approach a second encounter with the same understanding.
“This might be too intrusive of a question,” she said. “If it is, you don’t have to answer. But I can’t help wondering...”
“What is it?” he asked.
She braced herself, in case she was about to get an answer that would sting. “Do you love her?”
He studied her for several seconds without answering.
She lifted a hand. “Never mind. Like I said, that was too intrusive.”
“Savanna, if I loved her, I wouldn’t be doing what I’ve done with you.”
She couldn’t help feeling some relief, even though she knew his lack of feeling would only make what he had planned that much harder for him. “So what you’re doing...it’s all for the baby.”
“Entirely. Getting back with her, becoming a full-time parent, is the only way I can guarantee the baby will never be neglected or mistreated.”
Savanna didn’t know what to say. He was trying to do what he felt was right for a child, possibly his child. She couldn’t argue with that. “Okay, I’ll respect your decision, of course—and be careful to maintain the new boundaries you’ve set.”
He looked as troubled as she felt. “I’m sorry.”
“It’s fine. What we feel—it’s probably just sexual attraction, right? Infatuation? It can’t be anything serious, not this soon or this fast. Maybe I can’t keep my hands off you because I’m drunk on my newfound freedom. Or I’m trying to escape the harsh reality of my current situation. In any case, I’m in no position to make sound romantic decisions. This forces me to...to gain control of myself. Depending on how you look at it, it could be for the best.” Except what she felt for Gavin felt a lot more authentic than what she’d felt for Gordon the past few years. That was the strange thing.
“I appreciate your understanding,” he said.
“Of course. We can still be friends, though, I hope. We live so close it’d be a shame if that weren’t true. My kids idolize you already. I’d hate to think I blew their chance to have you around now and then.”
“We can certainly be friends. I’m staying the rest of the night—on the couch—just to make sure you’re safe. And I’ll be only a phone call away whenever you need me.”
“I appreciate that. Truly. I’ll support you in what you’re trying to do, will hope it turns out for the best.”
“Thank you.”
“No problem. But...I should cancel out on the barbecue next week, right?” Her kids were looking forward to the party so much she hated the thought of telling them it wasn’t going to work out, but if Gavin was planning to bring Heather, she wasn’t sure she could stand to watch him with another woman no matter how many times she told herself she had no right to feel jealous.
“No, don’t cancel. I think Branson and Alia will really enjoy it. You and I, we’ll be fine. Friends, like you said.”
“Okay.” She hoped he was right.
His phone went off before he could say anything else.
“Aren’t you going to get that?” she asked when he made no move to answer.
He grimaced. “I’d rather not.”
“But it’s so late. What if it’s your mother? Or brother? Aren’t you worried that it might be an emergency?”
“Not really.”
The truth dawned on her. “You think it’s Heather...”
He scrubbed a hand over his face. “I’m almost certain of it. I’ll call her in the morning, deal with...with everything after I’ve had a bit more sleep.”
His phone fell silent but pinged a moment later to indicate an incoming text. This time, probably because she was watching and he didn’t want her to see him continue to ignore it, he pulled it out of his pocket and looked down at the screen. Then his jaw went slack.
“What is it?” A trickle of concern put her on edge. “Is everything okay?”
“Heather’s in the hospital.”
Pushing away from the table, Savanna came to her feet. “What happened?”
“She says Scott beat her up.”
“The boyfriend she just broke up with.”
“Yes. She told me he was acting threatening, but I never believed he’d go this far. I feel bad for ignoring her tonight. She’s been trying to reach me since I got home from work.” He ty
ped a quick response before getting to his feet and shoving the phone back into his pocket. “I’ve got to go.”
“To the hospital?”
“Yeah.”
“But...how will you get there?”
He put a palm to his forehead, signifying he’d forgotten that Dorothy had hit his truck. “Right.”
“You can take my car.”
“Thanks. That’ll be quicker and easier than trying to make mine drivable.”
She got her keys out of her purse and handed them to him.
“If Dorothy comes back, make sure you call me—or the police, if you think they can get here sooner. I don’t want anything else to happen tonight.”
“Don’t worry about us.” She forced a reassuring smile, but her heart sank as she watched him go. She’d known him only a week; she shouldn’t feel quite as terrible as she did. But he was different, special. Whoever got him would be lucky. And, given the baby, there was no way she could ever hope to compete with Heather.
19
Heather wasn’t nearly as bad off as she’d made it sound in the voice mails she’d left him. Gavin had had time to listen to those while driving to the hospital and felt worse with each one. He should’ve picked up earlier. “Wouldn’t you know, the one time she wasn’t just being obsessive, I decided to ignore her.” That he’d been making love to Savanna while Heather was coping with such pain made everything even worse.
He was afraid Heather would have to stay in the hospital overnight, but they were just getting ready to release her when he arrived. Gavin passed the doctor as the doctor stepped out of the curtained cubical, so he heard the tail end of the conversation.
Heather had a fat lip. She’d told Gavin that in her text. But there didn’t seem to be much other damage. Overall, she’d gotten lucky. The neighbor who lived in the other half of Scott’s duplex had been home. He’d heard the fight break out, called the cops, and, since an officer had been right around the corner, help had arrived quickly.
“I’m sorry for what you’ve been through,” Gavin said.
