“You rejected us,” Hugh said flatly.
Aghast, Parker shook his head in instant denial. “That’s not true.”
“Of course, it’s true,” Justin shouted. “What else would you call it? You walked out without looking back. That’s rejection. Just tell us this.” His eyes were hard. “If you’re not our real father, who is?”
Parker flinched. “I’m your father. I’ve told you that already.”
“Stop splitting hairs and just tell him,” Justin snapped.
Parker’s jaw clenched. “I don’t know.”
Justin’s voice rang with rigidity. “Should I tell him who I think it is?” he threatened, “because you seem to have difficulty with the truth. I heard you mention about Grant Ellis. Is it him? Is he our father?”
Parker looked away, unable to meet Justin’s cold eyes. “I’ve always thought...I’ve always thought it was him. Grant Ellis. He spent more time with your mother than I did, as I was often away travelling.”
“Grant Ellis?” Hugh’s jaw went slack with sick horror as he stared at Parker. “You better be joking.”
“Just our luck.” Justin squeezed his eyes closed.
“But...but...” Hugh looked like he was about to cry. “He always got stoned with mum. And had that greasy ponytail and snakeskin shoes.” Hugh shook his head in painful denial. “No. No way. He’s not my father. He’s not. I won’t have it.”
Parker felt ill. “Only your mother knows for sure,” he answered flatly. “She would never confirm it to me.”
“There’s no way that loser’s my biological father,” Hugh insisted. “No way.” His eyes zeroed on Parker. “Who else could it be?”
Parker’s hand shook. He didn’t want to have this conversation, nor could he discuss this anymore; it was tearing him to shreds. “Listen,” he began urgently. “You’re getting yourselves upset. I’m your father. You’re my sons. You’re the ones I held when you were born. The ones I taught how to ride bikes and play football. Nothing has to change. Nothing. I love you both like you were.” But the boys were barely listening, he realized a moment later, when Hugh broke in.
“I don’t believe this,” Hugh whispered. “Why is all this coming out now?”
“He was telling Nina. I overheard.”
“Nina? Why does her name keep popping up?”
“She wanted to know why your battle with alcohol landed her in this mess. Landed us all in this mess.” Now Justin turned his anger towards his brother.
Hugh’s Adam’s apple bobbed. “Of course. I’m a murderer and a drunk.” He sucked in a breath. “I didn’t–I’m sorry.” He looked away. “I’m just like her, aren’t I? Just like mother.” He licked his lips. “Hurting people without knowing or caring?”
Parker and Justin exchanged a look. “Hugh–” Parker reached across the small room to him.
“Leave me alone.” Hugh turned away from them to face the wall. “Just...shut up and leave me alone.”
Chapter 5
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He couldn’t believe this was happening. How could he have caused all this? Hugh stared blankly at the snow wall in front of him. Ben had gone, now Emily, and the person whom he had always known as his father was gone too. All were punishment for what he’d done on the jet. If he hadn’t boarded the plane drunk...if he hadn’t continued to drink once he had boarded, none of this would have happened. First Ben, then Emily, and now this bombshell about their father. God.
He squeezed his eyes shut, shaking fingers digging into his eyes. Emily had splinted his broken leg, he remembered as guilt and remorse threatened to choke him. He had begged her to because she had been the only one who knew how to do it. He had felt like a worm for asking a favor from her after he had inadvertently killed her husband. But he hadn’t meant to hurt Ben, or hurt anyone. He hadn’t been in his right mind. He never was when he got drunk. And for him, drinking always turned to getting drunk. For some reason which he didn’t want to investigate, he could never have one or two glasses and leave it at that. He always needed more, one more glass, one more shot, one more hit. Oh, he told others that he could quit anytime he wanted to. It had become his mantra. And he believed that if he said it enough that it would eventually be true.
But it had been his mantra for years and he’d yet to see the realization of it.
He knew the rest of the group would have let his leg fall off it had been up to them. The rest of the group out here didn’t share Emily’s compassion, but he couldn’t blame them for that. He doubted if he would’ve had Emily’s compassion too if someone’s drunkenness had caused his brother Justin’s death.
His broken leg had kept him immobilized in his room since their first night out here when the others had built it. He hadn’t been able to be a part of the build due to his leg. He couldn’t put weight on it, couldn’t move it, and so remained stuck in this room, nothing but white snow all around and under him. Though the pain in his leg remained crippling – a constant itchy throb that he couldn’t touch because it was splinted – kept him in this room, avoiding the others. Cowardly, he knew, but the thought of being out there amidst the others, confronted by their hatred and condemnation made him shrink even further into himself.
When Justin had told him and Parker that Jake and he were going back out to bring back the women, Justin had been muttering and rolling his eyes, saying that Jake was acting like an anxious father, that the women had probably only gone out to stretch their legs. Hugh didn’t envy Justin for having to go with Jake to search for the women, Jake made it plain that he hated all three of them: Parker, he and Justin. But Hugh hated himself for putting his brother in this situation in the first place. And he would never be able to forgive himself for crashing into that cockpit. Everyone had gone southwards since then. Jake hadn’t been overly anxious about going out to search for the women. He had been right.
Hugh hadn’t believed it when Justin had told them that Emily had killed herself by drowning, almost succeeding in taking both Angela and Nina with her. He hadn’t wanted to believe it, but Justin hadn’t been mistaken. Neither had Justin been mistaken when he had heard that Parker Drayton was no longer their father.
Hugh drew a deep shuddering breath. Now...now he didn’t know what to think. Since the plane had crashed he had had to come to terms with the fact that he had caused their co-pilot, Ben Denny, to die on their jet. Now he had to try and get his head around the fact that Ben’s wife, their air stewardess Emily, had killed herself. If that wasn’t enough to send him under, Parker Drayton was no longer his father. How would he ever be able to cope with even one of these, let alone all three?
He shook with anger that he and Justin had been lied to for so long about who their true father was. They hadn’t only been lied to by Parker, but his own mother too. Though his mother’s deception wasn’t much of a shock. Julia Grosvenor lied as easily as breathing. But his dad, no – Parker Drayton – had always been honest.
The tension that had now fallen over their small room here in the snow cave was thicker than that of his sleeping platform. Parker hadn’t said anything since he had turned his back to face the wall, and Hugh hoped it stayed that way. But he would’ve liked to talk to his brother alone. He wanted to ask Justin what had happened out on that lake with Emily. Wanted to ask him if there was any way that he could make amends. Justin was the only person he wanted to have that conversation with, but Parker stood in his way. Justin always had a solution, always knew things that Hugh didn’t. Justin was the classic older brother in that way. But as much as he wanted to talk privately with Justin, he knew that it would be a tall ask to expect Justin to know how he could get out of what he had caused here.
He clenched his jaw as he shifted on his sleeping platform, trying to erase the cramp in his side. He still didn’t know what he struggled to deal with the most: the fact that he was responsible for the death of two people, or that his inability to admit that he was powerless over alcohol had landed them all in this situation. T
hat admission was the first step in the Alcoholics Anonymous famed 12-step programme. A programme that he had failed miserably at the first step.
More than once.
Telling his father that he had been attending AA had been one of the most shameful things he’d ever had to admit. That, and the fact that he had stretched the truth a bit. Technically, he had registered to attend AA, and had gone to a few sessions. He even kept in regular contact with his sponsor. But had he attended every weekly session since joining two years ago? No.
Justin and Parker had tolerated a lot from him over the years in regards to his drinking, especially Justin who lived with him. It had been Justin who had first caught him drinking when he was younger. Hugh shuddered, not wanting to remember the age he had been when he had started drinking. Justin had taken him by his skinny young shoulders and tried to shake some sense into his young brain, Hugh remembered now.
The fear of admitting that he remained powerless over alcohol remained a stumbling block for him. Whether it was pride or fear he wasn’t sure, and in all honesty, wasn’t something he wanted to examine.
But somehow, someway, he had to make amends for what he had done out here.
Problem was, he didn’t know where to start, or if he would even be able to.
Chapter 6
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She was going crazy doing nothing.
Lying on her bed, Hazel stared up at the ceiling. She and Becky had returned from Nina’s home two hours ago, and Hazel had urged Becky to return to class.
On a deep breath, Hazel reached for the silver framed photograph on her desk. All four of them together–Nina, Alistair, Sebastian, and herself–and they were all laughing. The photo had been taken a year ago at Alistair and Seb’s twenty-seventh birthday party. Two days later, they had left to go backpacking around the world. She set the photo back down. She had contacted them, an email with the words EMERGENCY – PLEASE COME HOME!! in the subject line. What other choice did she have? She couldn’t face the worry alone, and they wouldn’t have wanted her to. Knowing now that there was a definite problem and not merely a figment of her overactive imagination, she needed her brothers. They’d been calmer in their reply email than she would have been, and she smiled a little. She needed calm. They were on the next flight back to London this evening.
Her mind felt crowded with what had happened. If it hadn’t been for Jake being able to make contact, none of them would even know what had happened. Worse, they could have all been killed, not just the copilot, and she would never have known.
The thought nauseated her.
The front door opened, and she cocked her head. A moment later, her housemates were calling her name.
“I’m in here.”
They crowded into her small room, pulling off their coats, gloves and hats as they did so. The cold had added color to Becky’s fair skin, but Hazel knew it would soon be peeling. Like Nina’s skin, Becky’s didn’t take to cold weather well. Paula, a tall and slender with dewy caramel skin pulled off her woolen beanie hat, letting her rich cascade of black woolly curls tumble free. Katie, a brunette, blew on her fringe as she tugged off her scarf.
Becky pulled a sheaf of papers from her bag. “Mr. Philip’s asked us to have this in by next Thursday.”
She couldn’t give a rip what Mr. Philip had asked for, but Hazel took the notes from Becky with a murmur of thanks, and put them on the table. She immediately, forgot about them.
“What time are Alistair and Sebastian arriving?” Becky asked.
“Oh?” Katie perked up, her eyes widening with excitement. “Seb’s coming? I thought he and Alistair were backpacking?”
“They were, but I’ve asked them to come home.” Sitting up on the edge of the bed, Hazel turned her desk clock toward her to check the time. Three hours remained until her brother’s flight got in. “Once Neen is found they’ll head back but, right now...” Right now, she needed the comfort of her brothers. “I’ve already sorted out their accommodation and made dinner for them.”
“You’ve been busy,” Paula commented.
“Not with anything really important.”
“A good meal is always important to blokes,” Paula contradicted with a smile.
“What time are they getting here?” Katie had gone to inspect her appearance at Hazel’s mirror.
“About three hours. I have their flight number. I’m going to pick them up.”
“I could do with a drive,” Katie told her.
Becky smirked. “Really, Katie? On the way home, you said you wanted to get started on Mr. Philip’s assignment straight away.”
Katie tossed a grin over her shoulder. “A gal’s allowed to change her mind.”
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Katie’s crush on Seb didn’t bother Hazel. As she and Katie waited behind the metal rail outside the arrival gate at Heathrow airport, she mused that having Katie ask questions about her brother had lightened her mood. She watched returning travelers stream out of the arrival gate, heard the squeals of delight from family and friends, while businessmen and women walked briskly past, their minds clearly focused on the next item on their agendas.
“I love the airport.” Katie beamed as she watched people flood out of the arrival gate. “It’s got such a buzz.”
Hazel drummed impatient fingers on the metal rail. “I only like it when I’m the one traveling.”
“There they are.” Katie couldn’t quite hold back the excitement in her voice.
Hazel started forward. Alistair and Seb, like several of the other travelers returning, looked fit and relaxed. Except for their eyes. Hazel saw on closer inspection that their eyes portrayed the fear that she too felt.
“Hey, you.” Alistair pushed the trolley with his and Seb’s luggage aside and embraced her before stepping aside to allow Seb to do the same.
Fraternal not identical twins, Alistair and Sebastian Bishop stood at the same six-foot-two, but Alistair resembled her with dark blond hair and hazel eyes, while Seb resembled Nina with dark brown hair and dark eyes.
“You remember Katie, my roommate?” Hazel said.
Katie beamed. She’d washed her hair before leaving, and had dabbed on Paula’s Coco Chanel perfume. She knew the slim-fitting red leather jacket and white jeans she wore were completely inappropriate for the current temperature, a merciless minus two, but she felt great, and that was all that mattered right now. She hugged both brothers, holding on to Seb slightly longer before pulling back. “How was the flight?”
“Long and boring.” Seb gave her a tired smile before turning back to Hazel. “But, as it was the only one out of Fuji today, we were lucky to get seats.”
“I’m so glad you’re here.” Hazel burrowed into Alistair’s solid chest. “I’ve been going cray-cray crazy.”
Alistair curved a strong arm around her shoulders while Seb took hold of the trolley and led them out of the arrival area. “They still haven’t found them” His eyes held a worry he couldn’t conceal. “It’s been days now.”
“Four days,” Hazel whispered. “I found out late. By the time I found out the media had already reported it. It was all over the news.” And for as long as she lived, she would never forget how it had felt to get news like that on a television screen.
“I still can’t believe this has happened,” Alistair breathed.
Hazel pulled out her car keys as they approached the car park. “I have the car waiting. Let’s get out of here.”
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“You made dinner for us?” Touched, Seb sat down at their communal kitchen table. “They fed us on the plane, but it was a while ago.”
Hazel spooned a large heap of spaghetti bolognaise onto his and Alistair’s plates. It felt good to be useful. She looked up when Katie breezed in with Paula and Becky. “You guys want some leftover spaghetti? There’s plenty.”
“I’m good, thanks.” Paula smiled at Alistair and Seb. “Welcome to our humble abode.”
Seb chuckled and sprinkled salt over his bolognaise. “Thanks. It’s a lot nicer than the digs I had when I was at university.”
“Becky and I have had our dinner so we’re going to start the assignment we were given today.” Paula sent Katie a mocking glance, which Katie pretended not to notice. “But we wanted to pop our heads in and say hi.”
“Glad you did,” Alistair said. “It’s nice seeing you again.”
“Likewise. Shame it couldn’t be under happier circumstances, though.” With a soft sigh, Paula and Becky headed out.
Purposefully leaving the seat beside Seb free for Katie, Hazel sat beside Alistair.
“You said no one knows how the crash happened?” Seb said to Hazel.
“No. No one seems to know yet.” Hazel bit her lip. “Frank Gwynne– he’s the man who owns the company hired to fly them to Salzburg– said he would keep me informed once the search team finds anything.” She frowned down into her spaghetti, her appetite slim.
“It’s going to be near impossible to sit around here and do nothing but wait for their calls,” Seb stated. He gave Katie an absent smile as she sat beside him with her plate of bolognaise.
Hazel began to eat. “When Neen didn’t call, something didn’t feel right. I mean, we always let each other know when we’ve reached the place we’re traveling to. All of us.”
“And it’s not always easy to do,” Seb said. “Some places you just can’t get a decent phone signal. So we send an email instead because we know both you and Neen will sleep easier.”
Spiral and Torn Books 1 and 2 of The Salzburg Saga Trilogy Page 19
