by Moxie North
“I figured that wasn’t how things worked with you two, so I didn’t say anything. I didn’t want to be different. I didn’t like that extra noise in my head, so I often tried to tune him out. Ignore him for lack of a better word,” he admitted.
“After that, the first time I was supposed to shift, was excruciating. We fought inside me for control. I didn’t know how to let him out. I knew how desperately he wanted to run, but I was too scared to let go. I was afraid if he shifted, if we shifted, I’d never be me alone, again.”
The shame at admitting the truth, out loud for the first time had the heat building up in Conner’s chest. He felt the tears welling in his eyes, not that what he said wasn’t really how he felt, but that now the truth was out there. No way to take them back, no way to escape his brothers’ judgment.
Dropping his head to his knees, Conner waited for the shouting, the anger. It never came.
Instead, he heard scraping, the sound of movement on the cave floor. Then he felt strong arms wrapping around his shoulders.
“Runt, you should have told us, we could have helped you. Talked about it,” Wyatt said close to his ear.
“He was afraid we would judge him for it,” Cage said wisely.
Conner managed to nod against his knees. He didn’t feel like he deserved his brothers’ understanding. It would have been easier if they were mad or disgusted. The quiet acceptance was too much for him to take.
Pushing away from his brothers he raced out of the cave, shifting hard and letting his bear out. His animal didn’t balk at giving himself over. They ran until they were back at his cabin, he grabbed a clean set of clothes and threw them on. Heading outside he jumped in his Jeep and peeled out heading towards the highway.
Pulling into The Chinook, he parked and exited the Jeep. Slamming through the door, he barely took in that the place was packed to the rafters. He’d walked past a number of motorcycles out front and knew the crowd wasn’t going to be the kindest of sorts.
Not really caring, he strode to the bar and gave the bartender a head jerk. Recognizing him, he poured a double of whiskey. Tossing it back, he shoved the glass back and gave another nod. A double pour again.
“Hey buddy! You mind letting that barkeep serve the rest of us?” A man called from the other end of the bar.
Conner looked up to see a barrel-chested biker, who was more fat than muscle, glaring at him. The glass in front of him empty.
“Hey, asshole, you hear me!” The fat man called out over the din of the bar. The conversation dropped to a dull roar at the loud proclamation. The biker’s buddies taking notice now, their eyes scanning down the length of the bar to Conner.
His animal’s fur was rising in anticipation of the aggression radiating through the bar now. He didn’t even try to deny his bear the opportunity to get mad. If Conner felt riled up and confused, his bear was one hundred times worse. His bear had no outlet, no way to blow off steam. And some guy taunting him was just what his bear was looking for.
His finished the drink in front of him and he stood to his full height, slamming the glass down on the bar top.
“Why don’t you shut your fat mouth,” Conner threw out, glaring down the bar. He took in not only the man, but his whole crew that was starting to get to their feet. A small part of him was thinking maybe he’d bit off more than he could chew. His bear was growling loudly, egging him on.
Thinking maybe getting into a fistfight would help him burn off some anger, he took a step towards the bikers.
He made it all of two feet before a sweet trilling voice sounded out, “There you are sugar! I’ve been looking all over for you silly Billy.”
Turning around, there stood his mate, shining in all her glory. Hands on her waist, one hip cocked to the side. Her blond curls hanging around her like a halo.
“What the fuck are you doing here,” he growled at her.
Completely ignoring his surly comment, she kept on with her sugary banter. “Oh sweet pea, you know I said I was sorry. I didn’t mean to harp on you about takin’ out the trash. No need to go drinkin’ just to stay away from me. I’ll stop nagging, if you just come home. Please honey, I’m so lonely sitting at home all by myself,” Mackenzie said offering up an exaggerated pout.
Conner’s bear was loudly chuffing, trying to soak up her scent that was stronger than even the numerous unwashed bodies in the bar. Damn, she smelled like sunshine.
“You shouldn’t be here.”
“Snookums, you know I couldn’t let you go off in a huff without trying to make amends,” she said coyly, sauntering up to him. She used one perfectly manicured finger to trail down the front of his shirt.
His bear was happier than a pig in shit from that little touch. Pathetic.
“You…shouldn’t...be…here,” he ground out, letting a little of his bear out in his voice to try and scare her.
He watched in fascinated horror as she closed her eyes and let her lips part. The tiniest gasp whispered out of her and a tremor ran over her body.
Those beautiful caramel eyes opened with her cougar shining brightly from within and she gave him a small smirk. “Do it again,” she whispered back at him.
Fuck him, she was crazy.
Grabbing her upper arm in a firm hold, he swiftly turned her and marched them both out the door into the cool night air.
Once the door closed behind them, she turned, pulling her arm out of his grasp and with one hand on her hip and the other hand poking him in the middle of his chest, lit into him.
“What on earth were thinking coming into this bar looking to pick a fight? I mean really! You might be a big bad bear, but you can’t shift and take out an entire biker gang in a public place.”
Conner really wasn’t sure what he was supposed to say to her. He was a little tongue tied. Every time she poked him, his bear growled in approval.
“Now let’s get some things straight Conner Leslie Rochon.”
Fuck him again, his mother had told her his middle name.
“How the hell did you even find me,” he demanded.
“Had your brother ping the GPS on your phone, not exactly hard,” she snorted.
Then she started in on him.
“I don’t care that you are going to be some whiny bitch about finding your mate. It wasn’t like I was in the market for a boyfriend, let alone a bonded partner. But the fates have made a decision that I’m sure your bear knows is set in stone. I’ll be honest, when you ran out, you hurt my feelings. By the way, my brother wants your balls to hang on his mantle. But then after I was assured by your parents that you were just in shock, I decided that if you need me to be the strong one then I will,” she declared folding her arms across her chest.
Conner used the short speech to try and get a grip on the myriad of emotions swirling in him. First, he was mad that he’d been interrupted before a much needed fight. Second, that she had followed him into a bar that was not a safe place pissed him off. Third, he wasn’t so pissed off as unreasonably terrified for her safety in a place like that. His bear was thrilled to see her, but horrified she could have been hurt.
Then what she said started to sink in. “The strong one? What the fuck do you mean the strong one? I’m the grizzly bear here, kitten,” he said, rising to his full height.
Mackenzie gave an unladylike snort. “Kitten? Don’t even go there, Teddy. I’m still resisting giving you a nice scratch to see how it feels when your mate is mean to you.”
“I wasn’t mean, I just left,” he yelled back.
“Don’t you yell at me Conner,” she returned loudly.
“I can’t deal with this right now, uh, Mmm, uh.” Did he call her Mackenzie? Mate? Or maybe ma’am? He had no clue.
“Mackenzie, but you can call me Kenzi. Not kitten,” she said with a glare.
“Okay, Kenzi, how about I take you back to my parents. Maybe we can talk tomorrow,” he offered. He didn’t want to talk to her tomorrow or the day after. He didn’t want a mate, he didn’t want his
damn bear contentedly rumbling in his head. He wanted to be left alone.
“Don’t do me any favors, Conner. I’ll make my own way home. I’ll be at your parents’ house tonight, tomorrow, and for the foreseeable future. I know what my cat wants and I’m not dumb enough to fight her. So when you’re ready, you can come and find me.”
Mackenzie turned on her cowboy boots, the gravel crunching under her feet, as she strode to the silver Hummer that he knew had the license plate ‘Rochon 1’. Of course, his dad would offer up his rig for her to go chasing after his wayward son.
He did take a moment to appreciate the fine sway of her ass in those tight jeans as she strode away from him. His bear was whining, so he told him to suck it up. He knew he couldn’t go home, couldn’t be so close to her tonight. Once she pulled out and had started making her way down the road, Conner took out his phone and texted Cage that she had left the motel and should be back within the hour. They had learned their lesson after Jinger. Turning back to the motel office, he checked in for the night.
Chapter 7
Mackenzie drove home talking to herself the whole time. “Who does he think he is? The fates have seriously screwed me over. A bear, a goddamn bear! What the hell am I supposed to do with a bear? Besides the obvious honey jokes, I’m at a loss. Mom is gonna be sooo pissed.”
Her mother was a lioness in the truest sense. Their family was wealthy, strong and well-liked. They had lived in California for as long as anyone could remember. Her mother had high hopes that her daughter would find the perfect cougar to mate with and continue their, in her mind, distinguished line.
“Fat chance of that,” she huffed.
Thank goodness she had excellent directional skills. She was able to turn on the unmarked road that led back to the Rochon family’s houses. She liked it here, she liked home too. The warm California days, tanning by her family’s pool. Mackenzie guessed long hot days were not something often seen in the Pacific Northwest.
Shit, she’d have to move. She hadn’t even thought of that before. With the rush of emotions and her cougar’s clawing and growling to get out and to her mate she hadn’t realized. There was no way a bear like Conner would be able to fit in the heavily populated wine country where she lived. They needed trees and mountains and ugh, fish.
“I have to get him to talk to me first, before I need to worry about moving.”
Parking the huge Hummer in front of the cabin, she saw the lights were all still on. Walking up to the house, the door swung open and Connie Rochon rushed out towards her.
“Oh, sweetheart, I’m sorry I raised such an asshole.”
At his mother’s acknowledgment of the shitty situation, Mackenzie burst into tears. The kind women folded her into her arms and squeezed.
“We will figure this all out. He’s my youngest and I’m afraid we’ve spoiled him,” she tried to explain.
Turning, Connie led her back into the house. She saw Edward, Dax, and the rest of the family in the living room including Cage and Wyatt.
Dax walked up to her and Connie let her go into her brother’s arms. “You okay, Kenzi?”
“Yeah, he was in the bar trying to pick a fight with a bunch of bikers.” At this, she saw Cage and Wyatt both turn to her.
“He what,” Cage growled.
“Don’t worry, I got him out of there. I don’t think he was going to go back after I left. He did let me know that he wasn’t interested in me. That kinda sucked,” she admitted.
“We talked to him, Kenzi. He does want you, his bear is over the moon. It’s just that…” Cage tried to explain.
“Conner and his bear tend to butt heads and until one of them wins out, they stay in limbo about things. I know he wants you, he just has to work it all out first. Get his head on straight, then I’m sure he’ll come for you,” Wyatt said encouragingly.
“Your brother better get his head out of his ass and fast. I don’t like my sister upset,” Dax growled towards the three bears standing across from him.
Cage couldn’t help but return the growl; his Alpha bear didn’t like being challenged. Even if it was from another Alpha shifter. “I understand how upsetting this is Dax, but I think we all need to work together so we have the best outcome here.”
Dax snorted, “Best outcome huh? Why don’t you call my mother and tell her what went down tonight and I’ll go kick some sense into your brother? Deal?”
“Although I can see how some ass kicking would be beneficial, I think we need to all sleep on this. Give everyone some time to settle down and we can meet here for breakfast and come up with some kind of game plan to make sure Kenzi and Conner end up happily together. Because that is what we all really want, right?” Edward sagely suggested.
“That seems like a splendid idea,” Connie called out clapping her hands. She was not about to let her sons and Dax tear up her living room scrapping over Conner.
“Let’s get poor Kenzi tucked into her bed. She’s had a long day, and the rest of you can head home. Breakfast is at seven, I’ll make Swedish pancakes,” she said.
Cage laughed at this, he was surrounded by women who thought every problem could be solved with food.
Hearing the pancake plan, Sophie jumped off the couch where she and Jinger had been doing a tennis match of head swings as the shifters in the room barked at each other. “Ohh, I’ve never made those! Will you teach me?”
The women gathered around Mackenzie, pulling her from her brother’s arms and chatted about batter and lemons as they hustled her down the hallway. Kenzi managed to look over her shoulder as she was dragged down the hall to see her brother give her a head nod telling her it would be okay.
Once the women had vacated the living room, the men turned back to each other.
“Who needs a beer?” Wyatt was already heading to the kitchen.
A chorus of yes’s echoed in the room. Dax dropped to a chair across from the two sofas that faced each other. The Rochon men took their seats once they had beers in hand.
“Well, fuck,” Dax said, popping the top of his beer and taking a long swig.
“Yup,” Cage agreed, tipping his bottle back.
“You boys will be the death of me,” their dad said shaking his head.
“Hey! I’m the good one! No trouble from me,” Wyatt said, smacking his lips after chugging half his beer.
Their dad just snorted.
“How the hell am I going to tell my family that my little sister is mated to a bear?” Dax sighed.
“What’s wrong with bears?” Cage calmly asked.
“Don’t get me wrong, nothing wrong with bears. Big, strong, and capable. But my family, or I should say my mother, had big plans for Kenzi. There was a cougar family in Nevada that, well let’s just say have a vested interest in a number of casinos. My mother was expecting to form an alliance of some sort.”
“Well the fates decide who your mate is to be,” Wyatt said around his beer bottle.
“I know that, and you know that. But my mother…she thought she knew better than the fates. I think she hoped if Kenzi just spent enough time with that family that she’d find her mate somehow,” Dax explained.
“Well, I guess she might not be too happy about this situation,” Edward chimed in.
“Nope, not too happy,” Dax agreed.
Down the hall, the ladies were all swirling around Mackenzie who was sitting on the bed. They were all talking over each other and answering each other at the same time. It was very confusing.
“You have to help with the wedding plans!” Sophie squealed. “Cage and I are bonded, but we still need a wedding. My parents are flying in a few weeks early to get acquainted and let’s just say they are going to be in for a culture shock. Plus I’m doing a lot of the catering for the wedding so we’re having some big cooking days leading up to it. I would sure love an extra set of hands.”
“Uh, sure, I mean I’m no chef, but I can stir and chop,” Mackenzie offered lamely.
“Perfect! I’ll take anything I
can get. Connie is all over the decorations and party rental stuff. Because we are having it here, I was able to keep most of my family back in England. Trust me, it’s better that way. Anywho, we are having it at the sweetest little chapel not far from here. Cage said it was built at the turn of the century as a place for the loggers to spend their Sundays. They haven’t had a regular minister there in years, but it’s available to use. We are setting up tables outside under the trees. I think it will be perfect!” Sophie chattered excitedly.
“It will be perfect. Of course if it had been a double wedding, we’d only have to rent the tables once,” Connie sighed.
“We’ve talked about this, Wyatt and I will let you know when we feel the need for a ceremony,” Jinger said. She was more than happy being mated to Wyatt. Enjoying their time together gave her parents the feeling of them just dating. Explaining a quickie marriage would have them freaking out.
Sophie’s family wasn’t at all surprised to get the call that she was marrying her boss. They sounded properly resigned to their non-conformist daughter’s shenanigans.
“I’d love to help out Sophie, if I’m still here,” Mackenzie couldn’t help but add.
“Of course you’ll be here sweetie, don’t you worry. We’ll get everything sorted in no time,” Connie assured.
Mackenzie nodded. “I’m really tired, it’s been a long day. If you don’t mind I’d like to go to sleep.”
“Oh my goodness, I’m so sorry. Here we are yapping your ear off. Poor thing has had more than enough excitement. Let’s go girls; we’ll see you in the morning. Sleep well Kenzi,” Connie said, leaning over and giving her a motherly kiss on her head.
Sophie and Jinger called out their goodbyes and left her to her thoughts. Her cat was anxious and upset. She didn’t blame her. She wanted to head outside and let her animal run, but she didn’t know the area, and to be honest, she was exhausted. Maybe after a good night’s rest, Conner would come to his senses.
Chapter 8
The next morning brought fluffy pancakes as big as a plate, covered in lemon juice and powdered sugar, but no Conner.